Dear Diary,

Mail call today and as usual the boss was playing silly buggers with it. He is quite fun when he does that. He was teasing me with a letter from Bella and then showing off to everyone with a paddling pool he got from his mum. How old is he? He is actually 28, I looked it up! While he was conning Nude-nut and Baz Vegas into blowing it up and filling it with water, I noticed that that ANA bloke, the one Smurf had a run in with on the first day here, Sohail, was sort of watching us with his arms folded and a strange expression on his face and talking about us to his mates. I asked the boss what it was all about and he said "Dunno, lets find out" so we went to see what it was all about. Sohail is definitely one of them blokes you wouldn't get in a lift with if you were on your own! Not only is he all sweaty and grubby looking, but he stinks a bit, and he has an evil expression on his gob. The boss asked for tea and Sohail offered him a seat and gave him a cup. The boss said lovely, thanks, only he pronounces it 'luvleee' which sounds quite sarky, needless to say, Sohail didn't offer me a seat or a cuppa. Don't have many manners do they, this lot? Bossman asked him to get one for me and he did after a bit of chat about females being allowed to drink tea with blokes, but I wouldn't drink it. The state of his fingernails and I bet the cup wasn't clean either, ugh! The boss asked him if he knew who had shot up the school but Sohail denied knowing anything about it. I don't think I believe him!

We left shortly after that cos I was getting a bit arsey with him about the girls not being allowed to go to school and the boss hoiked me out of there before I could really get going. I know I never went to school but I could of done if I'd wanted, and it weren't cos some sweaty evil looking bloke said I couldn't that I didn't go. Actually if someone like Sohail had said I couldn't go, I probably would have gone just to prove him wrong! We was walking away and I was trapping off about Bashira not standing a chance with blokes like him around, when the boss stopped me and stood over me, not in his bug squashing way, but sort of looking down at me in a nice way and using his really nice voice, and he said that he wanted me 100% by his side. I said I was but he said I couldn't be if I was worrying about one kid. He made me feel a bit weird actually, all sort of butterflies inside. He really does have lovely brown eyes, all sort of chocolately and gooey, and a really sexy voice, so that now I'm shit scared that I might be starting to get a bit of a crush.

Oh, for fuck's sake, Mols, get a grip! What are you like? he's the boss, you muppet!

…

Quaseem and I were chatting as he helped me make a temp. med. centre in a compound near the school and he was telling me about how his wife and daughter got killed by the Taliban. God, that's so awful, and Quaseem is such a lovely bloke. Nasty things shouldn't happen to nice blokes like him, he don't deserve it! I asked him about Bashira being promised and he sort of shrugged and said "Welcome to my country" so I guess it is quite common here. He was telling me about how all he wants is a peaceful Afghan, when there was a bit of shouting and yelling outside, so we went out to see what was occurring. Turns out it was Bashira's mum shouting at the boss cos Bashira had a black eye and lots of blood pouring down her face and her mum said it was my fault and she wanted me to treat it. The boss said no way, said it was against regulations, that she had to go to her own doctor but I persuaded him to let me look at it cos I would feel bad if it was my fault and I wasn't allowed to sort it. He called me a soft fool, well he didn't actually say I was but that was what he meant. I cleaned her up and butterfly stitched it together to hold it for the time being and then asked her whether her dad had hit her and why. Turns out her dad doesn't like her to talk to us, called us Americans, so I told her that we were English and that we were there to keep her safe, to look after the village and to keep the Taliban out of there and away from the mountain. She got a bit agitated and upset and begged me not to go the mountain tomorrow. Sounded like a warning to me and it worried me a bit, but before I could ask her what she meant, Sohail came in and hustled her away, so I couldn't.

…..

Was tidying away me kit and having a bit of a worry about what Bashira said, when Smurf came in. He does a lot of that, just coming into where I am, and hanging about!. I don't hate him or anything, in fact I quite like him as a mate, but I definitely don't want anything more than that and that's why I'm a bit worried about the way he is. I have told him over and over that it ain't going to happen but I don't think he wants to hear it.

I told him about what Bashira told me and he said we had to tell the boss cos there are ANA soldiers up there who might be in danger. The boss didn't want to know at first. He was lying in the paddling pool with no shirt on, what the fuck is he trying to do to me? But then his mystery guests arrived, not the Royal Ginge as it happens, but the Army Music lads and he got very excited. We was still trying to get him to listen to us, and at last he paid attention to what I was trying to tell him. He was not exactly chuffed and seemed more worried about me getting it arse over tit than anything else. Then the Major seemed to be on my side so the boss (Captain 'I don't listen to little squaddies' – where's he been? haven't seen him for a while!) seemed to back down and started agreeing with the Major that it was an opportunity. He told me and Smurf to wait outside while they discussed it and Smurf tried to hold my hand! Choked him off again, but he does worry me!

I was thinking about the way the boss behaves around me. One minute he's just normal, that is sarky and bossy and what have you, the next minute I catch him looking at me, just looking and he doesn't look away when I catch his eye, in fact, he smiles. I don't know what to make of him, all I know is that I am trying very hard not to fancy him! Keep telling meself not to be a muppet.

….

We are going on a night patrol up to the mountain CP so that we can be all organised by dawn. Then, if there is a raid on the CP, no-one will see us arriving or know we are there.

Can't do any more now, have to go and check my kit for this mission,

Love Mols. x

Authors notes: Know this is a bit shorter but the next entries are quite long and I wanted to split this up a bit. I find watching Molly change her opinions and attitudes fascinating as she begins to doubt things that she has always been certain about. Clever Tony Grounds made it quite subtle. I find watching Captain James is a whole different ball bag (as Molly would say) Thank you so much for the reviews, please keep letting me know what you think, it really helps.