Title: Shards [part 2] Pairing: Starbuck/Apollo
Series: Battlestar Galactica (2008)
Rating: 18R Type: Fanfiction – Dark/AU
Summary: After Admiral Cain assassinates Adama she destroys the Galactica with all possible saboteurs.
Kara Thrace has earned Cains respect, quickly being promoted into the hierarchy of the Pegasus; only to keep her 'pet' alive... Lee Adama.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Battlestar Galactica characters or anything from the universe of Battlestar Galactica. I am just taking the characters and playing with them a while – promising to restore them whole and unblemished! Thanks to the makers of Battlestar Galactica for creating these toys for me to enjoy. Please don't take any of my playing as having any bearing on the actual series. Enjoy.
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Lee was staring at her. It was half-way through the sleep cycle and she could feel his eyes boring into her back… cold and assessing.
Kara had done her best to ignore the feeling, but she had woken under his observation so many times she knew how it felt without having to open her eyes.
"What?" She groaned, eventually.
There was no answer.
"I know you're awake," she huffed, sitting up and twisting round to face him. "What is it?"
In place of the detached, emotionless glare she expected, Kara found her slave regarding her with a calm and fond expression that she had grown unaccustomed to.
"I was thinking of that party we had, back on Caprica…"
Kara blinked, but let him continue.
"Zak was telling me all about this amazing woman he had met and how there was nobody quite like her in the universe…"
Kara listened, feeling her long-dormant heart flinch at the mention of Lees brother…
"When we were introduced for the first time… I was knocked off my feet," Lee huffed a laugh, "Zak had to go and find you. Him… my little brother…" he shook his head, "Never did a thing right his entire life… except you."
Kara couldn't think of anything to say as she watched some of the past horrors they had witnessed fall from Lees face.
He was so handsome. How could she have forgotten that?
And Kara felt something within her thaw and deepen…
Keeping Lee alive wasn't enough any longer. There had to be more…
She had do something.
"And now look at you."
The words hit her like a slap in the jaw.
She blinked.
Lees face morphed from the soft, warm reminiscent haze to the sharp, bitter twist of reality that inked his eyes from love to hate in one small utterance.
And she couldn't blame him.
She had had to change.
She had had to become... this.
It turned her stomach. But what other choice could she have made?
She turned her back on him again.
They had no chance... all she had was the hold over Cain she had developed... the need the Admiral seemed to have for her... even that was tenuous. It relied solely on pleasing the woman; something that sickened Lee and made Kara ashamed to call herself an officer.
And in that moment; she wanted to give up. She wanted to shrug off this life and all it meant. She couldn't have cared if the whole of reality blinked out.
Perhaps the pressure was too much... keeping them alive was too much...
Kara felt herself sigh, "What can I do?"
There was an unbelieving silence.
Nothing moved…
"Yes... I'm asking..."
The skin on her back prickled as she gasped, feeling the tips of his fingers trace down her spine.
"It's a start..." Lee whispered.
Her stomach contracted... she remembered how she had loved this man... this man she had violated and this man in her bed...
And the light, airy, wonderful moment sank in on itself under its own weight, dragging with it all hope and remorse… making her anger
Before knowing it, she had turned to him, "What's a start? You think that any of this is changing any time soon?"
Lees face hardened into a mask, "Nothing will change if we simply comply."
He was right – but the thought of Lee single-handedly changing life aboard the Phoenix by getting himself beaten and shamed every couple of months made a snort of derision force its way through her nose.
"Things are changing, Kara," he insisted, moving his hands to her shoulders, "On board this ship there are new attitudes emerging…"
"Talk like that will get you killed Lee," she said, closing her eyes against the thought, "imagine what Cain will do to the son of Adama if you even begin to whisper about change…"
"You don't need to worry about me."
And just like that, fear turned to rage, "I don't need to worry about you?" The question was calm, quiet and dangerous… he didn't reply. "I don't need to worry about you?" She asked again, feeling herself rage in her mind and scream that if it hadn't been for her, if it hadn't been for the things she had done since they came aboard then he would be dead by now… or worse… far worse…
"No – in fact… it might be best if you distance yourself for the next few weeks…"
And, again, her feelings flipped… Had he thought he was protecting her? Did he think he was still fighting for her?
…keep her distance, "What the hells is that supposed to mean?"
His face was stone, "Goodnight Kara."
And, with that, Lee turned from her and snuggled down into the bed.
Kara wasn't sure what to think… She wasn't sure what to feel…
"Lee!" She felt the anger give to concern, "Lee…"
Nothing.
Gods… what was he planning?