A/N: I love both Taco Bell and Del Taco and I should weigh 50 pounds less for not living near either anymore, but sadly I don't lose weight that easily. xD Anyway, this was going to be longer, but it turned out to be like one of those SNL skits that goes on for ten minutes too long and isn't funny anymore. So, it ends where it does.

And also thank you Hazu, Gnu and Lealah for the reviews. Gnu... -rambles the part in Holy Grail where King Arthur is telling Bedevere it's 'ni' and not 'nu'- Ni!

Adventures in Taco Bell

By D. Ant

"This place bothers me," Goemon said as he and the others sat at a booth.
"Everything bothers you," Lupin muttered, ready to take a bite into his Double Decker taco.
Goemon glanced over at Lupin, then looked down at his drink. "The name doesn't make sense. Taco Bell. Do tacos have bells?"
"Of course they don't," Lupin said in frustration. "Don't be an idiot and just go get some food and shut up."
"I still don't see why we couldn't have gone to Del Taco." Jigen sighed as he picked at his Nachos Bell Grande.
"I already told you." Lupin groaned, more frustrated now than before. "Zenigata goes to eat there. Do you want to run into him?"
"But, they have fries," Jigen whined.
"Remember those cinnamon tortilla things Taco Bell used to have?" Fujiko asked. "Those were so good."
"Yeah, I heard the new things are fried noodles. Hear that, Goemon?" Lupin stared at him. "Fried noodles."
"Covered in cinnamon," Goemon said in disappointment. "No thank you."
"Del Taco doesn't have cinnamon covered fried noodles, now, do they?" Lupin remarked.
"No, they have milkshakes," Jigen said.
"Del Taco doesn't make sense, either," Goemon pondered. "Why don't any of these places make sense?"
"Makes more sense than Taco Bell," mumbled Jigen.
"You two are just sad," Fujiko said as she finished her chicken soft taco and began eating her burrito.
"Double cheese burgers, chili cheese fries, Macho Nachos, seven layer burritos..."
Lupin glared at Jigen.
Jigen decided to shut up.
"Are those any good?" Goemon pointed to Jigen's nachos.
Jigen shrugged. "Have some if you want." He pushed the container towards Goemon.
"I'm gonna get some Cinnamon Twists," Lupin said as he stood. "Anybody want anything?"
"More Mountain Dew," Jigen said as he held up his large drink cup.
Lupin groaned. He knew Mountain Dew was almost pure caffeine and he dreaded Hyper Jigen. Drunk Jigen is much better, he thought. "Okay, fine," he sighed, taking the cup.
"Get me another burrito, please?" Fujiko looked up at Lupin with puppy dog eyes.
She's doing this on purpose. She's only eating burritos to keep me out of her room tonight. "Fine," he once again sighed.
"More nachos," Goemon demanded as he inhaled Jigen's nachos, cheese sauce and sour cream all over his face.
"Uh huh..." Lupin made sure to grab some extra napkins as well. Nacho addict. Great.

Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Zenigata sat down at Del Taco. He had ordered a number 6 and an extra cup of fries.
He loved their fries. "They don't have these at Taco Bell," he scoffed. "Taco Bell," he then thought. "That name doesn't make sense..."

"Run for the border..." Jigen read from an ad.
"Don't even say it!" Lupin yelled in anger. "Shut up and drink your caffeine, you addict!"
Goemon began to say something when he was cut off by Lupin.
"You, too, you nacho addict! Look at you! You're pathetic! Both of you! You two need serious help!"
Jigen and Goemon looked at one another in confusion.
Fujiko was now on her fourth burrito.
"And you! What?! You don't want me to be within a block of you?!"
She too was confused, shrugging as she continued eating.
Lupin stood up and stomped away.
"Where are you going?" Jigen asked.
"I'm going to Del Taco so Zenigata can arrest me and get me away from all of you!"
The three shrugged as Lupin left, all continuing their caffeine, nacho and burrito consumption.