Due Atlantis

Carson and Rodney

Carson Beckett looked up from his meal as Rodney McKay plunked his tray down across from him. The astrophysicist had a look of distaste on his face as he began to shovel his food into his mouth.

Carson sighed as he wondered if he really wanted to know what was bothering the Canadian this time. Watching Rodney continue to shovel food into his mouth, oblivious to his presence, Carson decided to broach the subject.

"Hello Rodney," Carson greeted.

"Huh…oh hey Carson, when'd you get here?" Rodney responded as he looked up quickly before resuming his meal.

Rolling his eyes at his friend's lack of social skills, he proceeded to pick up the conversation, "I've been here the entire time lad! You were the one who joined me remember."

"I was, oh well lot of stuff on my mind, can't be expected to notice everything and everyone now can I," exclaimed Rodney.

"Aye I suppose not," replied Carson patiently, "and just what is it that's got you all preoccupied? You came in here look rather put off."

"Its that new guy," Rodney ground out as he stabbed his fork into whatever it was that the kitchen staff was passing off as meatloaf.

Carson paused as he considered who exactly Rodney was referring to. "You can't mean Benton can you?" At Rodney's confused expression, he tried again, "Fraser." Again there was no recognition; honestly the man was just terrible with names Carson thought. "Constable Benton Fraser…the Mountie. Honestly Rodney you really have to work on remembering people's names!"

"First of all Carson, I have more important things to memorize! Like the technology we need to use to defeat the Wraith. And secondly, is that his name? I thought it was Fenton or something," Rodney replied. "I mean who names their child Benton?"

"Well, probably the same ones that names their son Mer…" Carson began.

"Don't you dare say a word about that," Rodney threatened with a wave of his fork.

"Aye lad, I won't say a word." Carson said as he took a sip of his coffee. "So what is it about Benton that has you in such an uproar? When I spoke with him he seemed to be such an earnest and polite man."

"Yes, and that's the point," exclaimed Rodney with a point of his fork.

"Rodney, I'm afraid I don't understand what your saying"

"Look you've talked to him right?" At Carson's nod, Rodney continued, "And he's been what, nothing but polite, courteous, respectful and downright helpful?"

"Aye that he has…" Carson answered slowly, not sure what Rodney was getting at.

At the look confusion upon Carson's face, Rodney let out a disgusted snort, "You don't get it do you?" At Carson's blank look, he continued, "Can't you see, he's...he's playing up every Canadian stereotype there is. He's misrepresenting Canada!" Rodney practically yelled. "And do you know what he said when I called him on it? Do you?"

"No Rodney, what did he do?"

"He said, and I quote 'Thank you kindly, I appreciate your input as a veteran member of the Atlantis Expedition. I will do my best to be less formal, however I must warn you that I must act in accordance in a manner that will not disgrace the uniform of the RCMP' And then he had the nerve to offer to help me with an experiment I was running!"

Carson just blinked at his friend's rant. "Well did you accept his help?"

"What, of course I did! You know all Sheppard wants to do is play with the "toys," and your too much of a coward to even look at half the stuff." Rodney bit out.

Shrugging off the insult as pure Rodney McKay, Carson asked, "so what's the problem, you've found yourself a courteous and willing lab assistant."

"Haven't you been listening Carson?" Shooting a glare at Carson he continued as he weaved his hands through the air, "he's spreading a stereotypical view of Canadians!"

Shaking his head at his friends stubbornness, as well as insanity, Carson ventured in a soothing tone, "I'm sure he's not doing it on purpose Rodney, from what he's told me, when his father was away on duty, the lad was raised by his paternal grandparents. I'd venture a guess that they instilled in him a need to be courteous and helpful. Nothing to be ashamed of. Besides it wouldn't hurt for some people to embrace the stereotype."

Having completely missed the jive at his expense, Rodney immediately seized the key piece of information with a look of horror, "Oh my God," he exclaimed, "you two talked about your parents didn't you."

Looking embarrassed, Carson nodded, "Aye I told him a bit about me mum."

"Oh why shouldn't I be surprised?" Rodney asked himself. "Alright look I may be able to overlook the whole politeness thing, after all I put up with you don't I?"

"Who puts up with whom?" Carson muttered under his breath.

"Huh, you say something Carson?"

"No Rodney. You were saying?"

"Oh right, like I said, I can probably deal with the attitude, but does he really have to wear that uniform all over the place?"

"Well he is a police officer Rodney, he probably feels comfortable in it."

"Yes well, the red serge is the ceremonial dress uniform, not the active duty uniform! I'm betting he wears it for the women," he punctuated with a wave at the women in the dining hall. "Just like the dog, have you seen all the women petting that dog!"

Carson rolled his eyes at his friend's logic. Though he had to admit that the Mountie did have quite a few admirers. "Now Rodney, I'm sure it's all just your imagination. I highly doubt that Benton is trying to pull a 'Kirk' as you call it. And for your information, Deifenbaker is a wolf not a dog."

"Of course he's pulling a 'Kirk,' I swear he's worse than Sheppa…" Rodney suddenly paused in mid speech as he processed Carson's last words. "A wolf! Dudley Do-Right has a wolf," he exclaimed.

Carson recognized that look on Rodney's face, the man was either about to have a coronary or go into a full-blown rant. He could only be so lucky Carson thought.

"That's just unfair how does he get away with bringing a dangerous canine to Atlantis when I couldn't even bring my cat! I mean I only saved the entire world a few times and would they let me take my little harmless cat? No! But they let Dudley bring a man-eating wolf! Should we be expecting his horse on the next Daedalus run…and another thing…"

Carson sighs as he takes another sip of coffee as he tries to block out Rodney's increasing rant. "I should have just kept my mouth shut," he muttered to himself.