Title: underneath our bones
Summary: A little honesty goes a long way. Or, Masaomi decides to tell Mikado about the Yellow Scarves.
Pairings: Mikado/Masaomi is endgame, with some mentions of Masaomi/Saki.
Notes: Hey, look, it's chapter two! :D
Chapter Two: Anri
Sonohara Anri is tired of secrets and lies. They sit heavily inside her body, turning to stone, dragging her down into the river called Saika. When she meets Mika, she's the one who keeps her head above water, who takes her places, who makes her feel like she is still herself, deep inside. So when Mika disappears, Anri panics.
She tries to find her, searches in every nook and cranny Mika might have disappeared into. Everywhere she goes Anri sees her face, smiling and laughing and then twisting into people she doesn't know, people who might have been Mika in some other life but can't possibly be now.
When she meets, or rather, sees Ryuugamine Mikado for the first time, she thinks she will be able to hold on a little while longer. She might just be desperate, but he's shy, just like she is, and she likes the way he looks at her, like he wants to share his every thought, but doesn't yet know how. (Sonohara Anri knows she doesn't deserve to be trusted and looked at like that.)
For the first time since Mika disappeared, she feels happy again. She has found a place where she belongs. Kida-kun is nothing but kind, and Ryuugamine-kun.. She knows he can be brutally honest, but he's never cruel about it, and the words he says... Sometimes she needs to hear them.
While she definitely hasn't known her new friends for as long as they've known each other, Anri is perceptive enough to notice something has changed between them, after they've been dancing around each other for the last couple of weeks. Kida-kun jokes a bit less, he's more serious, and she also notices the way Ryuugamine-kun looks at him, like he's proud of him for something she's not aware of. She can't place it, exactly, but she knows they've grown closer to one another, and that means she's really just a third wheel to their close friendship.
She knows she should have expected it, but it doesn't stop her from feeling disappointed. Not even when Ryuugamine-kun goes through the effort of finding back her shoes for her, and, as she remembers, when he tried to rescue her from those horrible girls before. So it surprises her when he knocks on her door one night, to ask if she wants to come out. There's something he wants to show her, he says. She can admit her heart jumps a little, and Anri reluctantly agrees to go. (She just doesn't know yet what she has agreed to.)
He's not dressed in his regular school clothes, but he blends into the crowd easily anyway, all the while making sure they don't lose each other in the crowd.
"Didn't you say I was supposed to be here half an hour ago, Mi-ka-do?" Kida-kun's voice suddenly appears beside her, and she nearly jumps.
"Sorry, Masaomi," Mikado apologises, and his friend waves the complaint away. "I would've texted you, Sonohara-san, but I don't have your number and I still thought it was rather important that you see this."
Kida-kun leans forward to her conspiratorially, pretending that he's about to whisper a secret into her ear, even if she knows it's merely a way for him to tease Mikado. "Mikado is actually hiding a girl he apparently rescued in his apartment," he tells her, and Mikado immediately flails, gets flustered, and tries to get Masaomi to stop talking by throwing a hand onto his mouth. Anri can't stop herself from smiling, even if she's surprised. Ryuugamine-kun, saving a girl?
"And Mikado was a knight in shining armour!" Masaomi continues, temporarily freeing his mouth from Mikado's hands, "and he saved this poor damsel from the black bike and took her to his house!"
"Masaomi!" Mikado's face is a brilliant shade of red by now, and they struggle a moment or two longer before he finally gives up and Masaomi smugly smiles, Mikado obviously having failed in getting him to shut up.
After the boys get over their little spat, they make their way to Mikado's apartment (or his fortress, as Masaomi mockingly calls it now). "She was sleeping when I left," Ryuugamine-kun explains before he opens the door, "so please be quiet. I don't want to wake and scare her. She was really frightened today when I met her. If we can help her, the last thing we should do is scare her away." Anri nods, but Kida-kun looks tense for a moment, as if he wasn't entirely taking Mikado seriously up until this point.
When they all step inside, she can make out the shape of a person on the floor, unmoving in their sleep. Cautiously, they all approach, and she wonders who this girl is when she sees her closed eyes. She really reminds her of someone she used to know.
When she looks up, Ryuugamine-kun is waiting for her to say something. "You're thinking it as well, aren't you?" he asks, and slowly, she nods. Kida-kun has crouched down next to the girl, his head tilted slightly while he studies her features. Finally, he rises.
"You've noticed the scar, haven't you," he asks, and Mikado nods.
"She said she can't remember anything, but I can't help but think she does." The three friends all look at each other, and then almost jump when the girl on the floor stirs. They all stand frozen when she slowly opens her eyes and turns her head, her eyes widening comically when she sees all of them standing next to her. She's shrieking hysterically before any of them can manage to get a word out, and Mikado quickly kneels next to her. "Please don't scream," he says, trying to placate her, "they're my friends, they're only here to help you. I promise."
Considering the loudness of her screams, it's a miracle she even managed to understand him. When she finally closes her mouth and slowly nods, they all sigh in relief.
"This is Kida Masaomi," Mikado introduces, "and Sonohara Anri."
"Okay," the girl says, soft-spoken, but her eyes linger on Anri. She can feel it even when she hides her own eyes underneath her bangs. Awkwardly they stand around, until Masaomi decides to sit down so he's more at eye level with the girl, and Anri follows his lead, carefully sitting down with her feet folded underneath her.
"I know it's late," Mikado continues, "and that we're all tired, but I know there are people looking for you, and I want you to be safe. That's why I asked my friends to come. The black rider has seen me, and it's probably not a good idea if you stay here for too long. There's a big chance they're going to be looking for me."
"You were followed by the black rider?" Masaomi interrupts, and Mikado nervously laughs.
"It's... kind of a long story?" He seems to accept that answer for now, so Mikado continues. "I was sure my friends would want to help you out if they heard your story. Won't you, guys?"
"Of course," Masaomi says, and goes off on a tangent about how he'd always have time to save a pretty lady. Mikado just ignores him and directs his eyes at Anri instead.
Anri hesitantly finds herself nodding. The girl still sneaks glances at her every now and then, she notices, like she's trying to send Anri a message somehow. She's scared, she realises. And maybe she wants to tell them why, but she's too afraid to say anything at all. Anri knows all about not being able to talk, because being scared is sometimes easier. The truth can be a terrifying thing.
She understands why Mikado needs to ask this of them, even if he's not direct enough to say it. They're all out of their depth here, aren't they? "She can stay with me," she says. Her eyes are focussed at the floor, though, so she doesn't have to see them looking at her.
"Is that okay with you?" she hears Mikado asking, and she knows he's asking the girl, not her. (She has already agreed, hasn't she?) Ryuugamine-kun trusts her, she instinctively knows. Perhaps not as deeply as he trusts Kida-kun, but he places value in her words, and he knows that she means to do right by them. It makes her feel oddly wanted.
"Yes." She seems to be a girl of few words, Anri thinks to herself, unlike... Unlike Harima-san. Her best and only friend throughout middle school was a chatterbox, speaking more than enough for the both of them. And yet, this quiet girl reminds her of Mika, somehow. It can't be the colour of her eyes, or her hair, or the way she holds herself, but there are traces of Harima Mika in her. It's only a feeling, but Anri has comforted her friend many times before, and this girl, she looks frightened as only Mika can. Over the top, and loud, while she creates as much distance between her and what scares her.
The girl who is not quite Harima Mika quickly gathers her things, but Anri feels comforted in the fact she may have a slight part of her friend back – and feels even better when she realises she doesn't need that comfort anymore, not with both Ryuugamine-kun and Kida-kun by her side.
Masaomi walks the both of them to Anri's house, after Mikado has said goodbye. When her guest has gone inside, he asks for her phone and programs his number into it. "You can always call me, if anything happens," he tells her, and she nods, out of politeness, but also because she believes him.
"Thank you for letting me stay here," the girl says, the moment Anri steps inside. "I wouldn't have known what to do without your help…"
"It's okay," she says, and allows herself to smile at her. She knows from experience that everyone needs encouragement, after all. She can return the favour, now.
Considering how late it is, the both of them go to sleep, or try to, anyway. Anri spends most of the night staring at the ceiling in the dark, and at some point receives a text from Kida-kun, who asks her if she's also still awake. 'Yes,' she replies, and rubs her eyes.
The next day, the three of them all look tired, and she knows she hasn't been the only one losing sleep. She has trouble staying awake in class that day; her thoughts keep drifting to not-Mika alone in her house, and whether she stayed there, like she promised she would. Although, Anri wouldn't blame her if she had decided to leave. She's not sure if she would be able to accept the kindness of strangers, no matter how well-intentioned it is.
After school, Masaomi miraculously still has energy left over to go debate with the student council, and she and Mikado decide to walk home to her apartment together, because they need to discuss what to do next.
However, their plans are thwarted by two ominous looking figures waiting for Mikado by the school entrance. As usual, Anri tries to make herself as invisible as possible. She doesn't do it on purpose, she just seems to shrink inside herself. Meanwhile, Mikado gets more and more flustered because of his unwanted visitors – until the guy threatening him is roundhouse kicked in the head by none other than the black rider. And then Orihara Izaya appears and it seems they've got themselves a situation set up for disaster. Anri excuses herself quickly – though she doesn't miss Orihara-san's sharp look when she does – and makes her way home, knowing she has to act quickly now.
She calls Kida-kun on the way home, but he's probably too busy debating about longer lunch breaks or the broken toilet on the second floor, she figures when he doesn't answer. She decides to text him instead. She just hopes he will see her message in time, because Mikado is going to need all the help he can get.
At the pace she's running, she reaches her own place in no time, and she nearly slams the door open when she gets there. The girl in her house looks up from the book she was reading and frowns at her. "Is something wrong?" she worriedly asks.
"Ryuugamine-kun is in trouble," Anri explains, and begins to empty her book bag. "I hope Kida-kun will be here soon. I told him it was urgent, but..."
"You seem like a good friend," the girl says, seemingly out of nowhere.
"I'm sorry?"
"The way you look after them, I mean," she elaborates. "You care about what happens to them, don't you?" Anri feels her face heating up, and quickly continues with her bag and places her books next to the wall so she doesn't have to look at her guest. At the same time her phone resting on the table vibrates.
'Be there soon, don't do anything rash,' Kida-kun's text reads, and she sighs in relief. A few minutes later, however, her phone vibrates again, and this time it's Ryuugamine-kun.
'Black rider wants to meet our guest, promised she won't harm her. Okay to come over?' She bites her lip, and when she looks up the girl is watching her expectantly.
"That was Ryuugamine-kun," she says. She ends up handing over her phone, so the girl can read the message herself.
"Would it really be safe?" she asks, and Anri hesitates, because she really doesn't know.
"I trust Ryuugamine-kun," she starts, "so if he says she won't harm you, I believe him. And we'll all be here, in case anything happens." Although she does wonder if they, a bunch of high schoolers, could ever take on the black rider.
The girl nods. "You can... tell him that they can come." The text is quickly sent off, and in less than a minute she receives a reply that he and the black rider are on their way. The only thing left to do now for the two girls is to wait.
About fifteen minutes later, there's a knock on the door, and Anri rises to open it while she feels the tension in the room rising. There's another knock, and she twists the knob, expecting to see Ryuugamine-kun and his companion. "Kida-kun!" she says, surprised. After receiving Mikado's text, she'd almost forgotten that he would be coming as well.
"Is something wrong?" he asks, questioning her sudden outburst. At least he doesn't ask if she was expecting someone else, and she inwardly cringes.
"No," she says, "well, I'm not sure?" She explains their predicament to him while he steps inside and takes off his shoes, nodding and encouraging her to continue when she stops to consider her words. "So, we decided to tell them to come, but we're not sure what's going to happen next."
"Did he happen to mention if Izaya would be coming as well?" Kida-kun asks, and Anri shakes her head. Frustrated, he groans. "We probably should stay here," he admits. "I don't know what else to do either."
It doesn't take long before someone else knocks on the door shortly after Masaomi arrived, and they all apprehensively look towards the hallway. Well, it's her house, so Anri decides to get things over with. She finds Mikado standing on the other side of the door when she opens it, peering through a crack outside. The only person with him is the headless rider, and she wordlessly looks from him to her and back again.
"Can we come in?" Mikado quietly asks; Anri steps aside and removes the chain, albeit reluctantly. Aside from the helmet, the black rider could be any regular woman in a suit. Although normal women obviously don't wear helmets inside the house, she thinks to herself.
Instead of speaking, she shows Anri her mobile phone after she has stepped inside. 'I'm sorry to intrude,' it says, 'I just found out about this girl and I had to find out whether we have anything to do with each other.'
"It's alright," Anri says, even if she's not entirely sure about that.
When they step into the main room, the girl in the corner visibly gets more nervous, twisting her fingers around the hem of her shirt. Mikado tries to smile, but it looks more like a grimace. "Guys, this is Celty," he says, gesturing to the black rider. Anri is certain that, if the girl had been holding anything, she would have dropped it. Her mouth is open, and the two women stare at each other for much longer than anyone else finds comfortable.
Finally, the black rider gets a hold of herself and grabs her mobile to type, 'What's your name?'
The girl, on the other hand, is still in shock and covers her eyes with her hands, softly groaning "no, no" to herself. The black rider seems to be at a loss as to what to do, and turns to the other occupants of the room.
Mikado explains, "She said she can't remember anything, and that probably includes her name..." He shrugs apologetically.
"I can." The whisper is so soft it's barely understandable, yet everyone in the room hears it. The headless rider tilts her head, her helmet dangling in a rather precarious position, and everyone else can't help but stare at the girl in the corner of the room. "I'm sorry," she says, her voice a whisper at first, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Her shoulders shake while she sobs, unable to look at anyone.
Anri is the first one to react, sinking onto her knees and reaching out hesitantly. "Why are you sorry?" It's not right to say there is nothing be sorry about – putting words in someone else's mouth is something Anri has always disliked.
"That I'm- that I- the lies- and- and deceit. I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she starts apologising all over again, "I should've," her shoulders heave, "told someone. Or- or shown them. But I was-" ashamed. She doesn't say it, but Anri can guess what the word is supposed to be.
She can only make an educated guess now, take a leap of faith. "Mika-san?" she says, so softly only the girl next to her must be able to hear. The girl freezes in-between sobs, although she still sniffs before peering at Anri between her fingers. She tries to smile at her, and hopes it gets rid of the uncertainty she feels.
"You know?" the girl, Mika, whispers back. Slowly, Anri nods. "How?"
"We're friends," Anri tells her. "I just... thought I recognised you."
"Anri-chan," Harima Mika says, and then throws her arms around Anri's shoulders, sobbing right next to her ear.
"That's Harima-san?" Anri hears Ryuugamine-kun ask, and she sees Kida-kun nod from the corner of her eye. And although the headless rider has no features to discern, Anri thinks she can see her disappointment. Harima Mika has nothing to do with her, after all.
After she has calmed down a bit, Mika tells them how she ended up like this. About what Seiji did to her, what his sister promised her. She tells them about the surgery, her fake name, and how she ran away when she wasn't certain of her safety anymore, and had been with Seiji ever since. "I know he doesn't really love me," she says, her eyes directed at the floor. "But I did this for him."
When she's done, the black rider – Celty, Anri reminds herself – thanks her and takes her leave, and Anri can't help but feel sorry for her, now. The truth wasn't what she thought it would be.
Anri allows Mika to stay with her another night, as it's been a trying day. She leaves the next morning, confident that she will be able to confront Seiji with the truth. "I hope he can love me for me, and not just for my head," she says, and although Anri wishes she would be as confident as Mika needs to be today, she isn't sure if she's ready for that yet.
She has secrets of her own, and she's scared more than anything to lose what she has built up during these last few months. Trust. Loyalty. Friendship. Perhaps not something she can call love quite yet, but she has no need for that from anyone. She glances down at her wrist, at the glint of the edge of a blade inside her sleeve, and then sighs.
She truly wishes she could tell Ryuugamine-kun and Kida-kun about herself, but she's terribly frightened at the same time. She wouldn't blame them if they no longer wanted to be her friends. Although, that might be the least of her problems. Anri's seen the news, she knows there's someone out there slashing people, someone who must be a child of her own Saika, operating on its own, and only she has the power to stop them. And yet... she can't bring herself to act. She's in a position of power, but she still feels powerless, and alone.
In all these years, she has never spoken a word of what she's seen. Not of her father, or her mother, or that fateful day when everything changed.
On the table, her phone vibrates. Maybe it's Kida-kun, or Ryuugamine-kun, asking how she's doing. Maybe all of this means it's time to step forward. To accept help. Maybe it's time to tell her friends she needs them, as much as they need her.