I figured the funniest songs I could find to do in this story would be for Avenue Q, which is why I'm using another Avenue Q song, entitled The Internet Is For Porn. You'll see. It's going to be totally crazy! So please R&R!

The Internet Is For Porn

If there was anything Carly Shay wanted, all she had to do was ask her brother for it. Today, all she wanted was to have her own web show with her friends, but she figured Spencer would probably say no. It was one of the few things he would say no to, because in his mind, the Internet was just made for profanity, and that Carly didn't need to do anything Internet related.

Freddie had a backup plan: if Spencer asked what the web show was for, Carly would say it would be to teach people about the most exciting topic at the moment: the Internet.

At the moment, they were arguing over why (or in Spencer's case, why not) Carly would need to have a web show. Finally, she dropped the bomb of teaching kids about the Internet. She argued she was thirteen, and that was old enough to teach little kids about things without warping their brains.

"Finally, I get to teach a whole lesson, all by myself!" she said, showing she didn't need Spencer's help. "I'm going to teach something relevant, something modern." She realized that it was time to tell him what this web show was 'going to be about'. "The Internet!" In fact, she started to sing to seal the deal. "The Internet is really really great!"

"For porn!" Spencer argued.

"I've got a fast connection so I don't have to wait!"

"For porn!"

"Huh? There's always some great new site…"

"For porn!"'

"I browse all day and night…"

"For porn!"

"It's like I'm surfing, at the speed of light!" Carly said, trying to save herself from losing.

"For porn!" Spencer said, pointing a banana at Carly. He started to peel it to make a smoothie for himself.

"Spencer!"

"The Internet is for porn!" he said, dropping the entire thing in the blender.

"What are you doing?" Carly asked, not exactly sure why he was making a smoothie when Groovy Smoothie wasn't that far away.

"Why do you think the net was born? Porn, porn, porn!"

"Spencer…" Freddie laughed at how pitifully Carly was doing.

"Oh! Hello, Fredward." Spencer said, just realizing Freddie was there. Freddie stopped laughing. Carly turned to Freddie.

"You are ruining my song!" she said, and Freddie was wondering when a song was thrown into his plan.

"Oh, me sorry," Freddie said, thinking so hard his words came out like little kid language. "Me no mean to." Suddenly he realized what he was saying. Me no mean to?

"Well, if you wouldn't mind, please be quiet for a minute so I can finish?"

"Okey dokie," Freddie said, continuing his little kid talk.

"Good." She turned back to Spencer, and began to sing once again. "I'm glad we have this new technology…"

"For porn!…oops!" Spencer said, as he dropped the lid of the blender on the floor.

"Which gives us untold oppertunity…"

"For porn!" Spencer said. Carly slapped his arm. "Oops, sorry!"

"Right from your desktop…"

"For…" Freddie said, but Carly turned and gave him a dirty look.

"You can research, browse, and shop…" Carly said, and Spencer bit his tongue from yelling out what he thought the Internet was for. "Until you've had enough and you're ready to stop!"

"FOR PORN!" Spencer yelled, not able to take it anymore. Freddie busted up laughing.

"Freddie!" Carly cried.

"The Internet is for porn!" Spencer said, taking over the song.

"No!" Carly cried, feeling she was losing the argument.

"The Internet is for porn!"

"Spencer…"

"Me up all night honking me horn! Porn, porn, porn!" Spencer said, using Freddie's little kid language.

"That's gross!" Carly said at her brother, her cheeks turning red. "You're a pervert!"

"Ah, sticks and stones, little sister," Spencer said, tousling her hair.

"No, really, you're a pervert!" she said, slapping his hand away. "Normal people don't sit at home and look at porn on the Internet!"

"Ohh?"

"What?!"

"You have no idea!" Spencer said, getting an idea. "Ready, normal people?"

Freddie instantly knew what Spencer was getting at. "Ready!" he said.

"Ready!" Spencer said.

"Ready!" Freddie said again.

"LET ME HEAR IT!" Spencer cried.

"The Internet is for porn!" Spencer and Freddie harmonized.

"Sorry, Car-lay," Freddie said, slightly mocking Carly. She was disgusted that Freddie thought the same things as Spencer.

"The Internet is for porn!"

"I masturbate!" Spencer said. It's official, Carly thought. I am completely grossed out!

"All these guys unzip their flies for porn, porn, porn…!"

"The Internet is not for porn!" Carly said, trying desperately to get back on topic.

"PORN, PORN…"

"Now wait just a minute!" Carly said, suddenly getting an idea. "Now I happen to know for a fact that you, Spencer, you check your sculptures and art galleries online."

"That's correct," Spencer admitted.

"And you buy things on Amazon dot com!"

"Sure!" Spencer said, thinking to when he actually bought a donut on Amazon.

"And you sell our old possessions on eBay!"

"Yes, I do!" Spencer said, thinking back to when he got a thousand dollars just for an old broken chair of the Shay family.

"And Freddie, you sent me that sweet online birthday card!" Carly said, remembering something else.

"True…" Freddie added.

"Oh, but Carly, what do you think he do after?" Spencer said.

"Yeah…!" Freddie said, nodding in agreement.

"EEW!" Carly said.

"The Internet is for porn!" Spencer and Freddie sang to add to their song.

"Gross!" Carly said, thinking about the kinds of things Freddie and Spencer claimed to do online.

"The Internet is for porn!"

"I HATE PORN!"

"Grab your…" Carly interrupted at this point, but neither one of them cared. "…and double click for porn, porn, porn!"

"I HATE MEN!"

"Porn, porn, porn, porn!"

"I'm leaving!" Carly said, starting to walk towards the stairs, but Freddie grabbed her shoulder and wheeled her around.

"Porn, porn, porn, porn!"

"I HATE THE INTERNET!"

"The Internet is for…" Spencer started.

"The Internet is for…" Freddie sang.

"THE INTERNET IS FOR PORN!"

"Yeah!" Spencer said, as Carly fled from the room and out the hall. Unfortunately, she didn't notice the calendar—April first.

So how did you like this one? Some April Fools joke…I know it's a little more adult than the other, but I think this one is way funnier! I think I'm going to keep doing Avenue Q songs, and then maybe I'll do a couple Weird Al ones. I have a few more chapters planned out, but I wanted to see what you thought of this one before continuing my story. (In case you didn't understand the ending, Spencer and Freddie tricked Carly into thinking the Internet is for porn because it was April Fools day, and that was the plan all along. They had it planned out for a little while, which is why Carly had to convince Spencer. Because they had the plan, Spencer had to convince Carly he thought the Internet was for profanity, so she would have to convince him to let her have her web show. Woo!)

--Maddie Marie.