Sorry for the delay. I was all set on writing this days ago, but apparently the website had a glitch.
The case was coming to a close, and she felt an odd feeling inside. As if she'd be missing something when it was over. And maybe she was; after this, her dreams of receiving what she wanted would be gone.
Adelaide Taylor beamed as her daughter raced into her arms and hugged her tightly. "Oh, honey, Mommy missed you so much." Olivia heard her whisper into the child's ear. She smiled softly at the mother and daughter, basking in the moment. The little girl let go of her mother and turned to her father. Adelaide was grinning from ear to ear as she approached Olivia.
"I just wanted to thank you," she said through tears. "We owe you so much."
Olivia gave the woman a warm smile. "It's just good to see her safe again."
"You have no idea," she replied. "Do you have kids, Detective?"
Olivia's face changed expression quickly at the woman's words. "No, I don't."
She looked back behind at her daughter, her eyes bright with love. "I never thought I would ever have children. Never wanted them either," she said. "But then she came along and... before Elsie, my world was incomplete. I felt like I missing something, but I didn't know it until she was in my arms for the first time. If you ever get the opportunity to have a child, don't pass it up. It's the greatest feeling you will ever have, a feeling no other compares to."
Then she smiled, her eyes silently thanking Olivia and walked back towards with her family. Olivia stood for what seemed like forever in the same spot, mulling over the words that had just been spoken to her.
She wanted a child so bad it ached.
The streets below her looked so tiny from above as she peered over the balcony. She liked coming up here to the rooftop. She could ponder on their latest case of her latest problems without any disturbances and just the city surrounding her. It wasn't quiet, by any means, but it kept her sane.
She turned as she heard footsteps coming in her direction. "Liv, is everything okay?"
Olivia looked away from him and back over the edge. "Yeah, I'm fine."
"You've said that so many times before, but I know it's not true," he said, moving slightly to be able to stand shoulder to shoulder with her. "Tell me what's going on."
When she didn't say anything and just shook her head, he pushed on. "I saw the way you looked at that little girl, Liv," he said quietly. "I know you too well to not notice what this case did to you."
She breathed in. "Elliot - "
"What are you thinking about right now? And don't say nothing, because we both know it's a bold faced lie."
She sighed heavily, preparing herself for the words she knew were coming from him. "I was just thinking about how much that mother loved her daughter," she said, hanging her head as she spoke. "And how I'll never get to experience any of that."
"Is what you want, Liv?" he asked, his eyes roving her face.
"I... I don't know anymore. I've tried everything, and I've just lost hope at this point. I mean, it's just not meant to be and I've accepted that."
"There are ways... especially these days, the traditional fall in love, get married, white picket fence bullshit is no longer the norm."
Olivia was quiet for a few moments, then lifted her head and looked him in the eye. "I applied for adoption," her voice barely a whisper. "But they told me I wasn't qualified." Her eyes burned with pain at the thought.
"Liv," he said gently, hooking a finger under her chin and pulling it up to meet his gaze. "Whatever they said to you... they're wrong. You'd make an amazing mother."
She shrugged nonchalantly and turned away. "I want to believe that, but I'm not sure I can."
"I know you think you don't deserve the chance because of who you are and where you're from," he said. "But you're the exception."
"What do you mean?"
"Your mother made the selfish choice to care more about her booze than you, and your father was one of the most cruel and vile human beings," he smiled softly at her. "And look how great you turned out."
Even with her head hung low, he could still see the small smile. "You think so?"
"I know so."
She looked back up at him, her eyes shimmering with tears. "I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Especially after what Mrs. Taylor said to me when we found Elsie," she said. "And how I shouldn't pas up any opportunity I come across to have children."
"If it's what you want, then she's right, Olivia."
"I know..." she said, inhaling deeply. "Which is why I need your help."
He raised his eyebrows curiously at this last statement. "What kind of help?"
She ran her fingers through her hair. "You were right when you said that you're the longest relationship I've ever had. You're the only man I've ever trusted, and I don't want to do this with anyone else. I wouldn't be asking you unless I was certain there's no other way," she amended. "And I know there isn't."
He stared at her with those intense eyes, waiting for her to continue speaking. "What do you need, Liv?"
"I want..." she let out a shaky breath. "I want you to give me your sperm."
So, have y'all heard Beyonce's new album? It's incredible. Most of this story is inspired by the song Halo. If you haven't listened to it, you definitely should. That is all. :)