When she woke things had changed; she had changed. She'd been laying on her side and was suddenly aware of just how thin and stiff the mattress beneath her way. It dug into her hip bone making her uncomfortable, but it also made it easy to see that the pain and soreness she'd had in the lower half of her body was gone and her stomach felt perfectly tight again. It was as if nothing had every happened, in fact, if it weren't for the low, hollow ache that she felt in her heart, she would have thought it was all a dream.

"Belle."

Rapunzel was there, in the little atrium that connected the small infirmary to the door on the other side. She was talking to Celeste when she saw she was awake. She was gentle, coming back into the room to see her as though she was walking over pieces of glass, but she still sat down on the side of her bed so she could face her.

"You look better, a bit less pale, but…how are you feeling? Your body I mean, physically."

She was thankful that Rapunzel had put that little caveat into her statement. Otherwise, the answer would have been too depressing to mention aloud and she wasn't sure if she'd have been able to manage words.

"Better enough to leave," she answered quietly.

Rapunzel nodded, then looked over her shoulder at where Celeste stood, examining her it appeared. She seemed reluctant, but eventually she nodded and turned to leave. Rapunzel offered her a small smirk of encouragement.

"I'll have Flynn pull the car around. He went to the ship while you were sleeping and packed up some of your things. We're going to take you back to his house for a few days, give you his parents master suite so you'll have some privacy."

She nodded, not because she agreed with her, but because she didn't have the energy to argue or come up with an alternative plan to argue for. In truth, she didn't like the idea of displacing Flynn or invading his privacy, but she felt like she had very little choice. Going back to the Jolly Roger would have been ideal but it had no bathroom and she wasn't in the mood to walk to and from the dock and face all those people. Granny might have been able to find her room now that they were rehoming the people from the Land of Untold Stories, but she wasn't sure she wanted to be doted upon. She would never set foot in the pink house again, there wasn't enough room in the library, and though she could go and stay with Rapunzel's parents as they'd once offered she didn't know if she'd find privacy there or doting from her mother. Flynn's place to recover was just as good as any.

When she sat up and began to move it was evident to her that her body was better, but her soul was still hurting, throbbing really; it was almost worse than before she'd gone to sleep. Maybe the pain in her body had kept her from feeling the full effects of the loss she felt. It didn't help that has she stood her eyes automatically fell on the teddy bear in the basket that Rapunzel had initially brought her. It was still there, by her bedside and she couldn't help but reach down and inspect it. It was soft and comforting in her hands. It was something to hold, some little piece of her son even if he'd never had the opportunity to hold it as she did now. It was the same with the little onesie that was also in the basket. He'd never even gotten to wear it. She'd never gotten to dress him. Change him. Wrap him in a blanket and swaddle him. She'd never gotten to learn how to be a mother. Those were experiences she'd been robbed of and would never get back.

As she prepared to go, living seemed to happen in a blur. She clutched the small stuffed bear to her chest and Rapunzel fit her into the jacket she'd forgotten she put on this morning, and kept a protective arm around her as they walked to the car. The fairies were talking to Rapunzel, and to her, offering her advice and kind words and touches. They all seemed empty and meaningless, and she barely felt their touches. She only had two questions for them, the first came when she spotted a young fairy who looked familiar, but she couldn't quiet place until she saw the sad look in her eyes. It was Violet. It was the fairy who had sent her a message. She was young again.

"How?" she heard herself inquire as she was ushered past her.

Regina. Someone told her Regina had returned after saving her sister and worked her magic.

It made sense. Regina was trying desperately to undo all her sister was doing. She would have felt partially responsible for what had happened to the fairy. She'd been sending away her child. Regina had made history. It was just a shame it was too late for her.

She clutched the bear to her chest as Flynn pulled his car up to the steps so that she didn't have to walk far and she found the door opened by Celeste.

"Mother Superior?" was her second and final inquiry before she would disappear. But the woman only shook her head.

"We've heard nothing from her since her departure. But I promise, when we get word you'll be-"

"No!" she insisted with more power than she thought she had. "No, it's…it's best if I don't know where he's gone," she concluded sadly. Yes, the point was to protect him from Rumpelstiltskin and not her, but knowing would make no differences. She might know how many miles he was from her, but she would never know his favorite food or his favorite book or how he liked his eggs or what he threw temper tantrums over…knowing would make no difference. In fact, the fewer people who knew, the fewer people who had the ability to tell Rumpelstiltskin where he was, the better; even if that meant she'd never know.

"It's best if no one knows where he's gone but Blue," she finally muttered before sliding into the car.

Flynn smiled at her from the front seat and promised he'd get her home soon enough, but she only clutched the teddy bear in her hands tighter. She had no home. Home was where her son was. Home was where she could never be.

Outside the car, she heard Rapunzel tell Celeste that she'd talk to her in a couple of days about what she'd just said. Obviously, they disagreed about her ability to know the location of her son, but she would be immoveable. Though it hurt, she did believe that she'd done a good thing today. She wished it hadn't ended the way it had! In her heart of hearts, she wished she was still at the convent, that Rumple was by her side as they stared down at the boy together in utter amazement talking about what this new chapter would bring them.

But she couldn't have that. All she could have was the assurance that whatever destiny their child had was still intact. That he'd grow up far from a father who would love him but never enough. Far from a mother who was weak. Far from a life that was strained.

How ironic. Rumple did magic and terrible things because it felt good. She had done something good, and the outcome was that it felt terrible. She held the teddy bear tighter to her chest as Rapunzel finally got in the car and they drove back into town with the only thing she could carry with her. It was a crude piece of knowledge that she'd been told since before she could remember but never really understood until this very moment.

Life wasn't fair.

So we're all off to a great start, right? I know this chapter seems long and slow and uneventful. I know it looks like it's a filler chapter but the truth is that it's not and it's slowness is intentional. I didn't want to rush anything in this small section. It's only for a few chapters, but I figured that for Belle a single second probably seems like an eternity without her son. I wanted the readers to feel that too. Are these chapters so agonizingly long? Good. Because I'm sure that's what Belle felt. That being said, this doesn't last long. You've got one more chapter until things pick up with the story I know we're all waiting for.

Thank you to Paintbrush123, Grace5231973, Fox24, Rumbellefan, and Theresa Martin for the reviews that you left me! I'm so happy to have all of you reading. I truly believe that you are going to enjoy this fiction even with all the drama in the beginning. I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts! Peace and Happy Reading!