Chapter Two:
Hours passed and then he was back with her.
He stood there and stared at the machines that engulfed her body.
A nurse appeared.
"You want an hourly update?" she asked.
He said nothing as he tried to take in every inch of her body.
He wanted to panic.
"Mr. Grissom?" asked the nurse.
"I'm sorry…yes I want an hourly report of her condition."
"Typed or verbal?" she asked.
His eyes were drawn to the heart monitor and he became entranced with it.
"Mr. Grissom?"
"Verbal is fine," he said softly.
The nurse eyed him. "We were told you were here as a precaution. You work with her?"
"Yes. I'm her…supervisor," he replied reluctantly.
"She's too young to die," sighed the nurse.
His blood pressure soared. "Give me the stats."
She rattled off heart rate which brought his eyes back to the monitor.
The nurse watched his reaction with each detail.
"She means a lot to you, doesn't she?" asked the nurse.
"I need her," he replied.
Grissom glanced at the nurse. "What is her prognosis?"
"I'm not at liberty to say. The doctor can…"
"My experience is that most nurses have seen cases like this and know more than the doctors."
The nurse glanced around. "Between you and me, she should have been started on a round of antibiotics. She's already showing signs of peritonitis."
It was Grissom's worst fear.
"What is the current antibiotic therapy ordered by the physician?"
"He hasn't written the orders yet."
Grissom fumed. "I want to speak with him."
"You won't tell…"
"I have access to view the chart. It's something I would have discovered on my own. I would appreciate your advice or concerns brought to me…confidentially of course," added Grissom.
The nurse smiled. "I'll notify the doctor immediately."
The doctor stood there as Grissom used thirty years of experience to rip him to shreds.
When he was finished, the doctor quickly wrote out the instructions and fled the floor.
The nurses smirked as one particular nurse smiled brightly toward Grissom.
He returned the smile and then stepped back into Sara's room.
His hand held hers tight as his head rested by her side.
The room was quiet except for the hissing of the sounds emanating from the machines that helped keep her alive.
He watched them intently.
It was those sounds she heard when she chose to surface toward the blinding pain.
Once she surfaced, she teetered between existing and letting go.
It would be easy to let go.
There would no longer be any pain.
The searing pain was unbearable.
She felt herself wanting to sink lower.
It was the voice that anchored onto her soul and kept her imprisoned in the battered body.
It always seemed to know when she wanted to slip away.
It would become persistent and she would drag herself back toward the sounds, fighting through the immense pain.
She focused on the voice now.
It was familiar and comforting.
It was just a single word that was uttered but it was her name on his lips that said more to her soul than any combination of words.
She recognized the voice.
She knew the voice.
She'd dreamed of that voice.
Now, the voice was calling to her and she pulled herself toward consciousness.
Not much further…
He felt her hand being pulled from his grasp.
Blue eyes met brown.
She looked confused but then a sense of fear gripped her as she glanced around.
"You're in a hospital," he said quickly.
She stared at the monitors, recognizing the hissing sounds.
It sounded hideous.
She tried to speak but panicked when she felt a tube down her throat.
Her eyes followed lines and cords and suddenly she wished she had remained in that place between consciousness and coma.
Too much pain…
His hand was there on her forehead forcing her eyes to leave the monitors and focus on his face.
"You have two broken ribs…several bruised…a collapsed lung…you have a deep gash on your head…no concussion."
He waited for her to digest the information.
I shouldn't feel this way…
I've had worse…
Beaten much worse…
He continued.
"The bullet nicked your liver…your spleen had to be removed."
Her eyes were wide with terror.
She tried to lift her right hand but it was encased with wires and an IV.
Her left hand came up and he quickly took it while his other hand caressed her cheek.
"I'm here," he soothed.
Her abdomen burned.
She wanted nothing more than to double over with the pain but did not have the strength to move.
"Are you in pain?"
She nodded sending shock waves through her brain.
Too much pain…
Just want to let go…
He glanced down her body.
"Abdomen?" he asked.
The squeeze of his hand was faint but he understood.
It hurt to move.
"Sara, you have an infection. They're going to treat you with a regimen of antibiotics."
He felt her feathery fingers against the palm of his hand.
Her grip was faint but he could sense she was bracing herself from the pain.
He quickly buzzed the nurse.
The nurse arrived quickly.
"She needs something for the pain," he urged.
"I'll call the physician."
"If he doesn't return your call within five minutes, let me know," gritted Grissom.
The physician arrived rather than calling in the pain medication.
He checked Sara's incisions, taking note of the sensitivity in her abdomen.
He glanced at Grissom.
"It's definitely peritonitis," he said softly. "We'll continue with a high dosage of antibiotics and give her a regular dose of pain meds."
The physician listened to her lungs.
"Her right lung hasn't improved. Pneumonia has set in."
Grissom did not react to the physician.
He merely caressed the palm of her hand.
"Ms. Sidle, do you understand what I've just said?" asked the physician.
I understand…
I'm dying…
He doesn't get it…
He still insists on keeping me here…
"She said yes," replied Grissom.
Grissom waited until they were alone to lean over so that his face was mere inches from hers.
"Stay with me, Sara," he pleaded.
He does understand…
She hated him at that moment.
She wanted to curse, slap him, hurl every hurtful thing he had ever said to her over the past few years in his face but instead she closed her eyes letting a single tear slip down.
"I need you," he whispered as he wiped the tear from her cheek.
She felt herself drifting deeper again.
The pain eased but it was still there.
It was still bone crushing pain but at least she did not want to let go at the moment.
Her soul cursed at her.
Let go Sara…
You've given it a good fight…
She drifted deeper.
She could barely hear the sounds of the machine or the sound of his voice calling her for that matter.
It was a good place to linger for the moment.
Grissom refused to let go of her hand.
Even when his head bobbed and his back screamed, he did not let go.
The nurses took pity on him, bringing in food and drink.
He ate and slept little, not wishing to take his eyes from the machines.
There were fleeting sensations of his presence that nagged her to the surface every now and then.
Her eyes would flutter and listen to the familiar sounds.
If her fingers moved, his voice was there, speaking softly to her.
He repeated her name like a mantra.
His voice drew her towards him until the pain became unbearable again.
It was those moments when her fingers caressed his palm that his voice became urgent.
Her name was replaced with a plea.
"Don't let go," he repeated.
Please let me go…
"I need you," he begged.
The lab needs me…
You never needed me…
"Stay with me," he pleaded.
You never wanted me before…
"The pain will be better tomorrow," he stated again and again.
The pain is worse…
I'm not getting better…
She felt her hand against his cheek.
It was warm and moist there.
His lips kissed the palm of her hand.
What I would have given for you to kiss me just once…
He kept up the vigil.
Crucial hours passed and he remained by her side.
He cursed when the nurse called him from her side.
Ecklie was there for an update.
"Call me…if she wakes…if there's a change. I'll just be a minute," he said as he reluctantly stepped out of the room.
Grissom breathed in deeply as he walked out into the hallway.
Brass and Catherine stood beside Ecklie.
"How is she?" asked Catherine quickly.
"She's in critical condition," replied Grissom.
"Is she conscious?" asked Ecklie.
"She's in and out," answered Grissom.
"Has she said anything about the shooting?" asked Ecklie.
"No."
"The D.A. can assign an officer to stand outside…"
"I'm not leaving her," barked Grissom.
"I don't see where this is helping…"
"No, you wouldn't," retorted Grissom.
"You have a job…a responsibility…"
Ecklie was interrupted by Grissom.
"Yes, I do and I'm doing it. Catherine is covering the unit along with Warrick. Brass is keeping me up to date."
"How long…"
There was a flurry of activity behind him and he whirled around to see the nurse rush into Sara's room.
Grissom followed.
Sara felt a lifting of her spirit.
Gone was the hand that held hers.
Here's your chance…
Just let go…
He did…
End the pain…
His hand covered his mouth at the flat line on the screen.
"Code blue," yelled the nurse.
Grissom quickly grabbed Sara's hand.
"Sara!" he called out over the noise. "Don't let go!"
He kissed her hand feverishly before releasing it as he watched the physician attempt to restart her heart.
One….
Two….
Three…
The physician glanced at Grissom.
Four…
There was nothing but silence.
The physician attempted once more as he slowly shook his head indicating it would be the last attempt.
There was a slight bleep but it faded followed by a flat line.
"Mr. Grissom, I'm sorry but…"
A slight bleep appeared and then another followed by another and the physician was scrambling to check her vitals.
"She's back. I'm not sure how but she's back," said the physician.
Grissom's eyes remained glued to the screen as the beeps became stronger and stronger until it was as if nothing had ever happened.
Instructions were rattled off as Grissom grabbed her hand and held it firmly in his.
The nurse watched as Grissom stroked Sara's hair as he whispered something in her ear.
"That's my girl. Don't let go," he said as his lips gently pressed against her forehead.
"Sir, the men…"
"I'm not leaving her," insisted Grissom. "Tell them I'll check in later…after I've done something about this."
Note from author:
I am back early from a day at the house...now referred to as the money pit....with a mouse....I like to refer to as a huge rat...that is going to meet a mouse trap tomorrow! Thanks for reading along. As always you know the drill, leave a review so we can continue.
Take care!