chapter 1 God + angel + mustaches = cheese
Me: Sorry for the late update and I have changed my name from 1dfanboy99 to the undead bro.
Pewdiepie: I DON'T CAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRREEE EEEE! Just kidding always happy to get another bro.
Mr. chair: Pewdie. Help me Pewdie, the barrels got me Pewdie.
Me and Pewdiepie: FAHKING BARRELS! LEAVE MR. CHAIR ALONE!
Stephano: Jesus Christ Pewdie you can't do shit can you?
Me: WTF! No more argument story time.
*Several hours later*
Ow my head hurts. I thought slipping back into reality from my subconscious state. I then realized I was lying down with my back on the ground with a broken vase and dirt near where my head was. I sat up a moment later to get a better look at the room when I saw Nikki on her hands and knees hunched over a very blue haired lady who was wearing an akatsuki cloak, a blue origami flower in her hair, and was wearing some very white sandals, she also had her nails painted a pinkish-red kind of color. Overall she looked almost exactly like Konan from Naruto but she had to just be a cosplayer.
She was drawing a mustache on her. "Nikki why are you drawing a mustache on the cosplayer?" I asked her very curiously.
"Ssshh. She's not a cosplayer." She replied with an evil smile.
"What do you mean of course she is, otherwise wouldn't Pein be here too?" I asked her sure that that Konan was just a fake.
"He is here now shut up you fucking moron." She replied annoyed and pointing to her other side.
I then began slowly crawling towards where she pointed at, and when I finally got over there I was surprised to see that she wasn't joking. Pein or a really good cosplayer was lying right there on the floor asleep? I still wasn't convinced that that these were the real Konan and Pein though so I decided to wake up the 'leader' and ask him myself. Because this guy had to know one way or the other if the they were cosplayers or not.
So I decided to wake him up with the most annoying thing ever MULTILPE POKES TO THE CHEEKS! I decided I was going to say poke every time I poked him out loud to make sure that he woke up and if this didn't work I was going to slap him with cheese while making him listen to 'Baby' by Justin Beiber to torture him.
"Poke, poke poke, poke, poke, poke, poke, poke." I said aloud when poking him getting absolutely no reaction.
"Hey Nikki I think there dead." I told her not sure if they were or not.
"Do you know what this means? She asked me with no emotion in her voice like always. Sometimes I swear she's a robot.
"We torture them?" I asked her evilly.
"No." Nikki replied sounding strangely unfamiliar.
"Now tell me where am I?" I heard her ask still sounding strange again.
I turned around to look at her when I realized that it had not been Nikki at all that it had actually been the Konan cosplayer who was now standing up and had covered everything but Nikki's head in paper. "How the hell did you do that!?" I asked surprised.
"Answer her question." I heard another unfamiliar voice say from behind me.
"WHAT THE FUCK!?" I yelled turning around to see the Pein cosplayer standing there looking at me angrily.
"Answer the question!" He yelled at me angrily.
"Not until you tell me who you people are and what your doing here." I said calming down and trying to assess the situation.
"You dare tell GOD NO!?" I heard 'Konan' yell at me.
"Tell us where we are and we shall tell you what you want to know." 'Pein' said calmingly.
"Fine your in Wewoka Oklahoma of The United Sates of America." I informed them.
"Where I have never heard of Wewoka, Oklahoma, or The United States of America, now tell us what village were in." He said annoyed.
"What are you talking about? Wait you guys aren't cosplayers are you? Quick tell me your names!" I began thinking out loud.
"I am Pein." I heard the ginger haired one say.
"And I am Konan." The blue haired one said.
"Alright what was the last thing you remember doing before you woke up here?" I asked both of them.
"Why do you care?" Pein asked me as I began to hear paper ripping.
"Look do you wanna know why your both here or not if you do I suggest you tell me what I want to know that way I can try to figure this out." I said quickly hearing even more paper ripping.
"We were…talking to our friends when there was a loud crash as our hideout door was destroyed by a girl with pink hair. Then there was a bright green flash from the roof and something fell from the roof and hit the ground making another huge green flash and that was when we woke up here." Konan said.
"Ok then thank you I think I figured it out." I said about to inform them of my discovery.
"You see your in a different world one that watches your world for entertainment and somehow when this thing hit the TV it teleported you two here." I said grabbing Nikki's fake sonic screwdriver of the floor and showing it to them.
"Well that is if the green flash you seen looked anything like this anyway." I added hitting it against the wall causing it to create a huge green flash just as Nikki ripped through Konan's paper and joined us.
"It… looked nothing like that." I heard Konan say displeased.
"Of course it didn't I mean come on Austin even you should've known that this wouldn't be that easy to figure out. Although lets see what happens if we turn it on and hit it." Nikki said grabbing it from my hand and clicking a button on it before throwing it at the wall creating an even bigger and brighter flash.
"What about that one?" Nikki asked the people I was starting to think were just cosplayers again.
"That one was closer but still no." Pein said slightly annoyed at us failing to figure out what brought them here.
"Do something prove you are who you say you are" I told them not asked told them.
"Look here you little brat, you cannot order me around do you have any idea who I am? I am god and I have been putting up with you then longer than I wanted so just tell us where we are and get us back to where we need to be!" 'God' said truly pissed now.
"No you look here this isn't Konaha, Suna, Ame or any of the other villages your in MY village! Our village me and my sister WE run this place and if you've got a problem with that that's to bad we'll tell you anything you wanna know later but right now I need to see something and I need your help to do it!" I told them making sure that they realized that they weren't going to be thinking that they were going to think they could boss me around
"…Fine. What do you want us to do?" They asked while glaring at me.
"Just use a jutsu prove to me that you are who you want me to think you are." I said calmly.
"Is that all before you'll answer our questions?" Pein asked calming down a little.
"Yes and if you would like something to eat or drink afterwards that would be just fine." I explained to them.
"Fine then lets just get this over with." Konan said making me remember she was still here.
Konan then created some origami figures out of thin air while Pein used his magnetic ability to flip and move the couch back to where it was supposed to be.
"Alright now what do you two wanna know?" Nikki asked them.
"Where are we?" Asked Pein while Konan threw some origami shuriken at me hitting me with six of them causing me to bleed on my already dirt covered clothes.
"We already told you Pein your in a different world and one that watches, and reads about your world but something happened." I told them looking at Nikki hoping she would finish explaining.
"We've seen into the future, things weren't supposed to happen like this. The barrier was supposed to be broke by the pink haired girl who would end up killing Sasori while Deidara was trying to capture the nine tails jinchuriki Naruto, he failed only because Kakashi Hatake was there." Nikki said carelessly.
"Oi Nikki can I talk to you for a second?" I asked stopping Pein from asking her a question.
"Austin I know your question and just trust me doing things this way we get rid of some serious moments later on and we get to have more fun." Nikki said without moving from her spot.
"What do you mean?" Pein asked confused.
"So are we just going to tell him everything, most or just what they need to know for now before we start screwing with them?" I asked knowing that they could still hear us since we hadn't moved.
"Just most… for now." Nikki replied trying to annoy Pein.
"Alright well while you explain that to them try not to get killed cause I'm taking a shower ok. Later." I said walking towards the bathroom that was up stairs while taking off my shirt.
"Nope. First we talk to them and explain to them everything they wanna know." Nikki said looking happy with her self.
"You said you've seen into the future so how much do you know about our organization and how far have you seen." Peon asked sounding worried as well as curious while staring at my scars and cuts.
"We've seen farther than you could ever imagine… past yours and Konan's deaths and into the war. We also know your real name, that you and Konan are students of the toad sage Jiriya, that we aren't looking at your real body that the body were looking at is your dead best friend Yahiko's, and we know more about your organization and the people in it then you do, for example we know that your not the true leader of the Akatsuki that the true leader is Tobi, we know how all your members deaths except for Tobi and Zetsu's, and we've even seen the past of your organization." I told them passing the rest onto Nikki to explain.
"That about covers what we can tell you for now." Nikki said with a smirk.
"What do you mean for now?" Pein asked us.
"Look we'll tell you more tomorrow, but it's late and we all need to sleep we got a long day tomorrow. But first are you hungry?" Nikki asked both of them while I walked to the bathroom for my shower.
"…What will you be feeding us?" Konan asked as her stomach growled.
"Ramen of course." Nikki said smiling at them.
"That will be fine, but we do NOT plan on staying long and I am ONLY accepting this food because of my hunger, now if we are staying over night I demand that we get a comfortable place to sleep." Konan said which surprised me because I thought they would need a lot more convincing.
"Of course and I will show you to your room as soon as your done eating which won't take long the ramen is almost done." Nikki said as cheer fully as possible which confused me because she was being way to nice.
Although I didn't hear much after that as I had decided to my shower tonight and just to go straight to bed because I was suddenly extremely tired. So I walked straight to my room after I got upstairs which was down the hall and instantly went to sleep the moment my head touched the pillow.
"Oi, Austin wake up we got a bit of a problem." Nikki said as she shaking me to wake me up faster.
"What the bloody hell do you think your doing waking me up this early?!" I asked her opening my eyes to see that it was still a little dark out.
"Just follow me and you'll see why." She said with slight excitement in her voice while dragging me out of bed and towards the hall, down the stairs, and straight into the living room.
"HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK WHEN THE HELL DID THEY GET HERE!?" I asked Nikki while looking at the problem.
Well problems. Standing in the middle of the living room were none other than Itachi Uchiha, Kisame Hoshigaki, Kakazu, and Hidan.
"Hey kid can you stop screaming for five fucking seconds so I can hear again?" Hidan said while sticking his finger in his ear checking for blood.
Me: Thank you for reading the official chapter one cause I had a lot of fun writing it and I would just like to thank you one more time for spending your time to read this story because this is only my second story and the first one kinda sucked. But thank you and if you found any typos or anything just tell me and I will fix it ASAP.
Nikki: You thank these dumb asses way to much.
Me: They're still reading this!
Nikki: Pewdie do you wanna say it?
Pewdiepie: I DON'T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR RRREEEEEEEEE!