Disclaimer: Cat is making me do this. She is holding Vince hostage until she gets her quota of Lester this week. Though I admit that I do like her ideas and think that Lester would be a valuable lifestyle coach.
Why the Definition of Moderation is Different From Person to Person
By Lester Santos as told to Alfonsina
"Put the box back," I said.
"But, please?" she whined.
"No. You may have ONE. The rest of the box goes back in the cupboard or else I am going to dispose of it for you," I said.
"You wouldn't. Would you?" she asked clearly begging me to tell her I wouldn't destroy that which meant the most to her.
"I thought you were serious. I thought you wanted to make a serious change in your body by the end of summer," I said.
I didn't care if she wanted it, she'd agreed to do it, my way. She'd agreed to my reward structure. It looked like I wasn't going to be able to compete with Hostess HoHos. Shit. She was only on the first hour of the first day of her weight reduction program and already it was looking like I wasn't going to get lucky.
How exactly does Steph losing weight impact my sex life? We have an agreement. She reduces her weight and I get to reward her. First it is with kisses and then some dates and finally some LIOs. LIOs are more for her than for me; you see the Lester Induced Orgasm provides the Amazing Lester Orgasm which is for me. I get lots of those, but they are kind of like Chinese food, you want more soon after you are done.
At least Steph had the ability to look a little ashamed of herself.
I closed the door to the break room and locked it.
"Come here," I said using a voice that wouldn't take no for an answer.
She had her head down and the wrapped pastry in her hand. She took three steps my direction.
"I can make a deal with you. Do you want to start out owing the bank on your rewards?" I asked.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, I'm willing to let you have a sample of what's on offer if you promise to be good today and surrender your pastries," I said.
"What will I owe the banker?" she asked with a shy smile.
"You'll have to pay it back with interest, at the end of your program," I said.
"I'm not so good with moderation. I thought all I took was a moderate risk to do your regimen," she said.
"Nothing moderate about me. This is going to be extreme starting now. But I promise the rewards and results will be more than worth it," I said.
"I don't know if I can work a full week to lose a pound to wait for the rewards. I am thinking the schedule should be moved up a bit," she said.
"No control?"
"No will power. Never had any when it came to the sweet stuff. I'll probably cheat as soon as you aren't looking," she said.
At least she was being honest.
"How about this: are you able to be good for a whole day? I can make the one pound reward a daily one, provided you are good." I asked. God, I am a genius.
"I might pressure you," she said. "I have a short attention span."
"I'm good under pressure."
"Can we compromise on desserts? You say none at all. Can you provide me with portion control instead?" she asked.
"Meaning how often, Steph?" I asked. She was used to getting her way with Ranger and Morelli but I was a horse of a different color.
"Every two or three days you provide some kind of a dessert? Your discretion? Please?" she begged.
"Dessert is consumed off site and we don't tell anyone about it. Then you have to work off the calories in a manner I deem appropriate?"
"Deal."
"Let's seal the deal," I said. I started to invade her space and backed her against the wall. I began to kiss her slowly and thoroughly. I spoke lowly, slowly and directly into her ear, "Raspberry cheesecake, tomorrow night, in my apartment 8:00. I provide everything you need and there will be no second helping. Oh and you'll be eating off the chest in the living room."
She was hardly breathing and her eyes glazed over, "Cheesecake. I love cheesecake. Not too cold though or the flavor isn't as good."
"Oh, I know Steph. Believe me I know," I said. I was planning on being the chest in the living room. God this was going to be fun. "I'll help you burn off the calories after you are done."
TBC…