The next few hours of school I'll I did was go through the different ways I could make it up to Matt. Maybe this way of thinking is futile, I'll probably never see him again or if I do I won't be able to make it up to him. The bell suddenly rang and I walked out of my Science class making sure no one watched me as I snuck off to the library. The last time somebody followed me to the library I wasn't able to study for a month!
I can't concentrate! I tapped my heal several times earning a glare from the librarian which gave "Fuck do you want!?" look back. I keep thinking about that utterly shocked look. I wonder if he hates me. Probably, I'd hate me if I were him. If I could I would want a do over on those five minutes. I slightly chuckled. Jeez the shit I've seen and done and those are the five minutes I wish to have back most. I leaned back on my chair, my hair fell back and Matt came back to mind. I shut my eyes tight trying to picture Matt smiling. Damn! I opened my eyes angrily. Why can't I picture it!? But the better question is why do I want to!? Damn I think he may have ninja-ed my brain or some shit because I've never thought about someone this much.
I slammed my hand to my face letting it rack down. God fucking damn it! My head is going to explode! I gave myself ache! I reached in my back pack for my i-pod. I turning it on Starlight by Muse came on.
Far away
This ship has taken me far away
Far away from the memories
Of the people who care if I live or die
Starlight
I will be chasing a starlight
Until the end of my life
I don't know if it's worth it anymore
Hold you in my arms
I just wanted to hold you in my arms
My life
You electrify my life
Let's conspire to ignite
All the souls that would die just to feel alive
I'll never let you go
If you promise not to fade away
Never fade away
Our hopes and expectations
Black holes and revelations
Our hopes and expectations
Black holes and revelations
Hold you in my arms
I just wanted to hold you in my arms
Huh, that's weird I don't remember leaving it on Muse... Wonder if this means something. Most likely not I'm just reading into this to much.
Fuck my Life. I sat in the chair across from Mr. Watari tapping my fingers on the arm's chair. "Hmm its very weird Matt's usually very good about being on time."
"Wait what?" I asked startled by the name.
"Oh, yes that's your roommate's name, Matt." he paused looking at the time. "Well lets just go see if he is in his, well yours too, room." he got up from the chair and I followed behind him. It can't be the same Matt, right? I mean there has got to be at least seven other Matts in this school.
He stopped in front of a door. I took a few steps back while Mr. Watari knocked on the door. I heard a few low thuds before the door swung open and "Oh! Sir, I'm so sorry! I fell asleep and I forgot! I'm sorry!" Shit its him.
Mr. Watari chuckled before "Its alright Matt. Actually I think its better that I tell you here. You will be getting a roommate."
"Really?" he asked sounding surprised.
"Yes, I thought I'd introduce you today and tomorrow he can start moving in." He looked to me and waved me over. There he was, his face dropped form curious to a mixture of stunned and confused. "Mihael this is Matt, your new roommate."
I took an eternal deep breath before putting on a smile and extending my hand "I prefer Mello." he grabbed my hand slightly before pulling it back.
"Well I'll leave you two to get to know one another." Mr. Watari said leaving. We watched after him for.
I turned back to face him, suddenly I felt my face go stiff and hard. "Uh Mel-" he started but I caught him off as I thought: Shit abort! Before fuck this up again! I turned leaving him un-able to finish or say anything else to me.
One way or another I'm gonna make it up to him... just not now but soon! I'll have plenty of time. I sat down next to a box and slowly started putting my stuff in it.
"So your leaving." I heard a voice say.
"That's none of your fucking business, Near." I turned to glare at him.
"Well I would just like to know if I can start extending my tower or not." he looked at the piles of dice in a pyramid shapes.
I looked at him before barking "Fuck off!" and putt my head phones on, turning it full blast to Calling All Cars by Sense Fail:
Calling all cars we've got another victim,
'Cause my love has become an affliction,
What did you expect from me? What did you expect from me?
I'm sorry but I Think I failed to mention
That I lied at my very first confession
What did you expect from me? Well What did you expect from me?
'Cause this has been building since I have been breathing,
And I know how it's going to end.
So will you scatter my ashes where they won't be found?
I kept my word when I swore that I would let you down.
(And now that I'm gone) Try to forget me and just move on.
So will you scatter my ashes where they won't be found?
I kept my word and you hate me for it now,
(But you knew all along) Try to forget me and just move on.
Oh my dear what have I gone and done now?
It's curtain call, I'm about to take my last bow.
What did you expect from me? Well what did you expect from me?
Without giving away the entire ending,
I ruined the evening again.
I don't, have love left inside, inside.
And I don't, have love left inside, inside.
Are you desperate for an answer?
I don't have an ounce of good left in me now,
That's why I walked out.
I am not the one that you should blame,
So take what I left you for the pain.
I am not the one that you should blame,
So take what I left you for the pain.
And do your best to forget my name.
I wish I could just start over with Matt but I guess me and second chances never really did mix well.
A/N: Thank you, thank you for so many reviews and all that stuff! I've decided to update this whenever I finish a chapter. (As long as I get reviews!) Review thank you please?
Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note, Senses Fail, Muse, or Blondie.