Officially Missing You

Miranda sat in the locker room staring at the screen on her phone. It was a text message from Ben. It was the first one that she'd received after telling him not to contact her until she was finished putting herself back together. The man clearly couldn't follow instructions. She smiled at his persistence. Miranda, I know Im supposed to wait until youre ready, but its been a little over 6 months & I just want to know how youre doing? How is Little Tuck? Im thinking about you. Always. I miss you. Miranda stared at the message, reading and rereading it. She wanted to respond and tell him that she was doing alright. That Tuck was doing very well and that she missed him, too. Miranda tapped the screen and started to type out a response.

"Dr. Bailey?" Teddy said interrupting her and making her jump. "Oh! Sorry!" The awkward, blonde-haired cardiologist said.

"Yes, Dr. Altman. Teddy. How can I help you?" Miranda said stuffing her phone into her pocket, the message still unanswered.

"You're still coming out with us to celebrate Shepherd's awesome brain thing, right?" Miranda nodded. "Great. We're about to walk over now."

"Let me just, uh, grab my jacket," Miranda said. She stood up and grabbed her favorite purple jacket and followed Teddy out of the locker room.

After leaving their patients in the hands of their residents, Callie Torres, Orthopedic Surgeon, Mark Sloan, Head of Plastics and Teddy, Head of Cardio, along with Miranda who was a General Surgery Attending, walked to Joe's Bar, chatting away. Callie Torres, Miranda's best friend at the hospital, locked arms with her as they strolled. Teddy and Mark were walking back behind them. "Mark, stop staring at my ass," Callie said feigning annoyance.

"Tell it to stop looking at me," Mark responded, making Teddy laugh. Callie looked at Miranda and they rolled their eyes. "We're meeting Derek at the bar," Mark added referring to his best friend Derek Shepherd, Head of Neurosurgery. He'd just landed the grant that he would need for his clinical trial. And all the attendings were treating him to drinks at their favorite bar.

"Yeah, and Owen will be joining us soon," Teddy said talking about her closest friend.

They walked into the bar. "Hey!"

"First round is on me!" Miranda shouted and they headed to a table.

"What's everyone drinking?" The waitress asked. Miranda looked up to see that the waitress was also Cristina Yang, one of her most promising residents. During the shooting, she'd had to perform surgery at gunpoint and, after a while, she'd taken a break from surgery. "The first round is on the house."

"Hey! If everything is on the house, there'll be no house," the bar owner, Joe, called across the room.

"Right. Uh, never mind. I know exactly what to make," Cristina said and went back behind the bar. She came back to the table with seven blue drinks. "I call this the Early Onset Alzheimer's because you won't remember anything after you drink it." The attendings took a sip and choked on the drink.

"I'll have a scotch," Derek and Mark said at the same time. They slid their drinks to the middle of the table.

"I think it's delicious," Miranda said with a smile as she downed the first of many drinks.

The doctors sat in the bar for a few hours talking about love, sex and surgery. While going to the bathroom, Miranda felt a pair of eyes on her, too drunk to comprehend, she continued on her way. Back at their table, the doctors continued to talk about their many life problems.

After they paid their tabs, Miranda stumbled into the hospital and ran into another one of her residents, April Kepner. "Dr. Bailey!"

"I'm not here, you don't see me," Miranda responded. The girl helped Miranda into an empty hospital bed. The attending's phone started to ring and for a split second, Miranda hoped that it was Ben calling. Her heart fluttered as she looked at the number. "Ahh! It's the OR. Answer it, Kepner." Once April got off of the phone Miranda said: "Good, now give me my phone. I need to call Ben."

"Who's Ben?"

"My ex. I dumped him, which I now realize was a big mistake, so I want to call him. I want to call him and tell him I have needs," Miranda said reminiscing. There were so many things that she missed about Ben and his skills in bed were definitely high on the list. "'Cause he understood how to take care of my needs in a way my husband did not. I want to tell him that. So give me my phone." Miranda decided that she was going to answer the text message that she'd received earlier.

"Are you sure about that, Dr. Bailey?" Miranda closed her eyes and nodded. "'Cause drunk dialing never really ends well."

Miranda dismissed the girl, waving her off. She snatched the phone from the resident's hand. "Look, you are a virgin, so you don't understand. And even though you haven't met your Ben… yet. You will meet your Ben. Not my Ben, but your own Ben." Miranda paused. The drinks were taking a toll on her. "Who might or might not be called Ben." April nodded, taking in the advice from the drunk doctor.

Miranda shooed the red-haired girl out of the room while she clutched her phone. She was debating. Should she follow through on her feelings and call Ben or wait? She opened her phone and looked at the text message again: I miss you. Miranda closed her eyes as she thought and pretty soon she was asleep, the phone still in her hand, the cursor waiting for her response.