Harley and Ivy Build a City!
Chapter 2: "My Poisonous BFF and One Giant Egg"
A/N: Welcome back to some more Harley and Ivy! Joining Harley and Ivy today is a special guest from the Harley Quinn Rebirth comics. Enjoy!
Harley and Ivy are asleep in their beds. Harley is talking in her sleep.
"No, no! Not the ketchup gun! Stop it! Huhh! Huhhhh!", Harley quietly complains to herself.
There is rustling outside, as the grass is disturbed. Harley hears a yelp, followed by the sound of someone falling into leaves.
"Huh? Wazzat?", Harley asks, waking up.
She takes a peek outside and barely sees something moving behind the tall grass. Harley immediately runs to Ivy's bed, moderately shaking her.
"Red, Red! Someone's outside!"
"Huu-uuUU-UUu-uhH?", Ivy asks, her voice wobbling because of Harley.
"Outside! Someone's outside! I saw someone."
"Okay, I'll take a look.", Ivy says, still half-asleep.
Harley starts to follow her out, when her leg suddenly collapses, forcing her to the ground.
"Whoops! I think my leg is asleep!", Harley exclaims.
"It's okay. You stay here."
Ivy walks out and rides a vine to the bottom. Harley struggles to bring herself to the window.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!", Ivy screams.
Oh, no! Red's in trouble!
Harley tries to help her, but she has trouble moving her limbs.
"I can't moooo—", Harley starts, as she loses the ability to speak.
Ivy comes in a few moments later, unharmed. She sees Harley lying on the floor.
"Harley?!", Ivy shouts.
"Ehh-rhmm-baaah mooo…", Harley struggles to say.
Harley sees the silhouette of what appears to be a giant octopus behind Ivy, but she blacks out.
Harley wakes up in her bed. She sees Ivy standing over her.
"Oh, Red. I had the most horrible nightmare. There was a sound, an' then you left an' I couldn't move anymore, an' there was a giant octopus behind ya, an' I couldn't save you…"
"About that octopus…", Ivy begins.
"MISS HARLEY!"
Harley looks in the direction of a familiar voice. It's a giant sentient egg on a saucer with tentacles.
"Eggy! I haven't seen ya in over a year!", Harley shouts. "Oh, Red. Look who finally came by! It's Eggy, from my time in the Secret Society of Super Villains!"
"Well, I'm glad to see you invited a friend to visit, but we really should talk about what happened last night.", Ivy says. "The reason you went numb and blacked out was because you were poisoned."
"Wha—? Who would do that?"
"Me, Harley. When you woke me up. I told you, you can't touch me."
"Oh, sorry, Red. I was just so scared. Eggy, gimme a minute ta freshen up. I'll be right back."
Harley takes some clothes into the bathroom and closes the door. She changes and puts some toothpaste on her toothbrush. In giddy excitement for the reunion, Harley drops her toothbrush into the toilet. In a hurry to meet her friend again, she grabs Ivy's toothbrush instead.
"Really? You can talk to plants?", Eggy asks Ivy outside the bathroom.
"And apparently, eggs now, too.", Ivy retorts.
"Egh-hrmmh-baaah mooo…", the two of them hear from inside the bathroom.
"Here we go again.", Ivy says.
Several hours later, as the three of them are having lunch together, a crowd of about twenty strangers approaches their home.
"I wonder what's goin' on out there.", Harley says.
"Oh, I just invited a few friends over.", Eggy causally says.
"Oh, I wasn't expecting to host a party.", Ivy says.
"Actually, uh… can we live here?", Eggy asks.
"WHAT?", Ivy screams. "But… no, that's not even possible. The ground water won't replenish quickly enough to accommodate all our needs."
"Hm, what about if we invite Weather Wizard?", Harley asks.
"NO. That man has no respect for nature.", Ivy says.
"Well, yer the mayor. You're the one who make the rules, an' I can keep him in line, no problem."
"There's not even any electricity here for him to charge his stupid wand.", Ivy says.
"What if we put up some solar panels?", Eggy suggests.
"We are NOT building a city.", Ivy says to Harley.
"Why not? I kinda miss havin' TV an' Facebook an'… an'…. Was it just gonna be the two of us? I love ya ta death, Red, but don't ya have any other friends that you wanted ta invite?"
"No."
"What about Kitty?"
"Selina? She's a mutual acquaintance."
"C'mon, you know ya love her too."
"She wouldn't be interested in living here, anyway."
"Yer missin' the point. Why can't we just build a city out here?"
"The moment we do that, Eggy's friends—whoever they are—will chop down trees and replace them with a shopping mall!"
"They won't, I promise!", Eggy says.
"No, but we can all live in little tree houses, like the one ya made for us.", Harley says.
They both look at Ivy.
"Fine. But if anyone invites Firefly, I'm kicking everyone out."
"Yay!", Harley shouts.
Eggy draws Harley close to him and talks quietly.
"Umm, should I not have done that?", he asks.
"Don't tell me ya invited Firefly!", Harley says.
"He said he wanted to come!"
"Of course he did, ya scrambled egg! He likes ta burn stuff!"
"Is there a problem?", Ivy asks, butting in.
"No!", they both respond.
Harley volunteers to go into the treehouse to move things around and make room for Eggy's guests, while Ivy makes fruit smoothies for everyone. Harley joins up, and the three of them sit at a table.
"So, just who are all these people, anyway?", Ivy asks.
"Just some peasants I paid to be my friends."
"Lovely.", Ivy responds ruefully.
"Ooh! What flavor is that?", Harley asks, eyeing Ivy's yellow and green smoothie.
"Harley… no.", Ivy says to her.
"Pleaaaase?", Harley asks, reaching for Ivy's drink.
Ivy snatches it away.
"Harley…"
Harley snatches the straw from Ivy's drink and licks it.
"Are you freaking kidding me?!", Ivy asks. "I swear, you're doing this on purpose!"
"Doin' what?", Harley asks.
"Excuse me, Eggy. I'll be right back.", Ivy says, hastily leaving.
"Sure, take your time.", he says.
Ivy quickly searches her and Harley's room for the antidote. But it's a mess, due to Harley moving everything around. Ivy then notices that Harley's bed is missing.
One bed? If Harley doesn't stop making careless decisions like this, she'll be dead before the week is over!
Ivy continues looking for the antidote. She checks her shelf, where she usually keeps it. Not there. She checks the drawer inside her nightstand. Nope. After about four minutes of searching, she finds it next to Harley's makeup. She makes her way back to the dining room.
"Miss Ivy!", Eggy shouts to her. "Harley has collapsed… again!"
"Move aside. I've got this.", she says to him.
"Ooouf. Uugh. What happened?", Harley asks, waking up dizzy.
"You drank my smoothie."
"I did not!"
"Fine. You licked my straw."
"Ohh! I did it again!"
"Yes. You did."
"I'm sorry, Red. Honestly. How'm I gonna keep livin' like this? What if it happens again? What do I do?", Harley asks her, scared.
"You won't need to worry about it anymore.", Ivy says, assuring her with a smile.
"Wait, what does that mean?"
"I've thought about it… and I figured out a way to make you immune to various poisons, like me."
"Really? Aw, cool! How long do ya think it'll take?"
"Try now.", Ivy says, feeling proud of herself.
"Aw, thanks, Red!", Harley says, hugging her.
Ivy is finally comfortable hugging her back. They smile at each other.
"I've said it before an' I'll say it again: You truly do deserve a hug.", Harley says to her.
"Well, I suppose one good thing did come out of this."
END
"Psst! See? Everyone deserves a hug once in a while. Go hug someone ya love right now! An' see ya next time!"