Of course I don't own any of the original characters, stories, concepts etc. of NCIS or otherwise, they belong to their respective owners. However any characters and/or storylines that I created for this story are mine.
The story happens during and after episode 5x08, but refers to previous episodes all the way into season 3.
Please forgive me any inaccurate quotes, as I have to translate them back into English for all episodes of season 5.
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Chapter 2: I wish we'd never met!
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Ziva's POV
„... I wish we'd never met!"
I winced as he spat these words at me, every word, every syllable, every single letter hurting me like the stab of a knife. He stormed out of the room, leaving me sitting there, all alone with my pain, still trying to compose myself, fighting to keep up the facade I had been taught to maintain all these years. A thought flashed in my mind: „Maybe I needed to deal with all these bottled up feelings, at least at some time?" But I quickly dismissed that line of thought as it contradicted everything I ever learned. Showing my real feelings made me weak and I was determined to be strong.
It took me at least 10 minutes before I felt I was ready to get up. But when I looked up the first thing I saw was the smashed vending machine. Seeing the sad reminder of my uncontrolled temper was bad enough, realizing that some of the glass shards had blood on them was unspeakably worse.
Yet again I had hurt the man I loved and even though I didn't come close to process what he had said about me neither trusting, nor supporting him, the realization that he obviously thought so hit me impossibly hard. I needed to be alone, to think, to find answers.
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Tony's POV
After what seemed like an eternity I had no more tears to shed for her. But I had thought that before.
„... I wish we'd never met!"
Had I really said the same words Jeanne had howled at me after she found out I was a cop? Realizing that my being with her was just a means to an end? Or had at least started that way?
Stupid, DiNozzo, you're just stupid!
Suddenly I realized it was already dark outside. I needed to go to my apartment. I needed to eat, to sleep. But most of all I needed to fgure out where to go from here.