Chapter 2
"LUCY!" The little world of black that I had become so accustomed to seemed to quickly fade away as I was being roughly woken up. Opening my eyes I see something I have only seen once, Erza in a cat costume. World, you shock me at so many times. But then again... this is Erza. "Er- Erza?" I asked, unsure if this was the dream or the world of peace and quiet was.
"What the hell happened?!" Erza roared. "Where are Natsu and Gray?" Erza questioned, we were on a mission last time I checked. "I don't know, what time is it?" I was seriously getting scared, hell, I'm pissing my... panties(?) Where is my skirt? I sit up and immediately regret that action because the world is spinning faster then it should be. "Okay," Erza began, very calmly for someone in this sort of situation. "The last thing I recall us doing was finishing a request, you sug-" "AND Natsu." "You and Natsu suggesting we go out for a drink."
That was mostly accurate, seeing as I AM a party goddess, and Natsu happens to be a party god as well. I sighed, Erza could only remember so little considering she's a lightweight. "Black hair." I suddenly spewed. "Huh?" "I remember seeing people with black hair and no clothes on." I told her. Erza growled lowly, couldn't blame her, it is probably Gray's doing. "Must be Gray's doing, when I find him he shall be punished." You could practically see pain that will soon be inflicted on Gray rise from the word 'punishment'. "I bet Juvia wants to be the one doing that to Mr. Stripper Man." I muttered. "Huh, Juvia heard Juvia's name." Me and Erza looked over to see Juvia in a flamingo costume covered in feathers, nothing BUT feathers.
"Juvia, do you know what happened?" I asked, it was worth a try to ask her. I don't think a little beer or whatever will make her drunk, I mean she IS water. "Juvia thinks so, the alcohol Juvia consumed was very heavy." Juvia walked over and sat down next to me, she turned and slapped me with the flyaway feathers on her costume. Personally I think she did that on purpose.
"Juvia remembers going to a club and everyone staring. Gray-sama made an impression on the people and they started stripping their clothes off, Natsu made some buffalo wings with his 'Fire Dragons Roar'-" Lucy interrupted her. "Whoa, whoa, whoa... Natsu can cook?" "Anyway, Erza became famous with the men there and you did too love rival."
Erza looked intrigued seemingly trying to hide her blush. "So... do you know where we are?" Juvia looked at the ceiling. "We're in China." Lucy nodded in understanding. "That explains a lot actually, the black haired people and the fact I couldn't understand a word they were saying."
"Lucy! Get down here!" Erza yelled, she was clueless to as why Lucy was up there in the first place. "Not yet! I trying to find a tall black haired guy and pink haired guy." That did not explain why Lucy was wearing army fatigues on top of someone's roof throwing skittles at people yelling, "TASTE THE RAINBOW!"
"Just get down here." Erza shouted. "Am I not allowed to have a little fun while I'm up here?" Erza facepalmed. "Where did you even find the army fatigues?" "I-I... I don't know..." Juvia looked at Lucy and sighed. "Juvia thinks Gray-sama and Natsu are still at the club." Lucy climbed in through the window into the stranger's home. "Nǐ shì shuí?!" "Sorry, mam... wait do you have any wine?" BANG! "Ow, ow! I get it! You have no wine! Can I borrow some clothes? Thank you." "Māmā, tā tōu nǐ de yīfú!"
Lucy came out the building wearing a white graphic tank top that said something in Chinese, black mini skirt, and black ankle boots. Her hair was tied in two ponytails using red ribbons.
"Alright, one problem: Where is the club?" Erza and Lucy looked at Juvia who blinked. "Do not look at Juvia, Juvia does not know."
Lucy walked over to the closest person, a girl who was a map. With a super huge smile, "Ni hao." The girl looked up at Lucy. "Ni hao, nǐ zhīdào jùlèbù zài nǎlǐ?" Lucy still had that huge smile on her face. "Super!" Then she jumped into the air clapping, then her smile started to fade. "Dammit! Why didn't I watch that much Ni hao Kilan!" Lucy looked at Erza and Juvia and asked the question that made then groan in frustration.
"Do any of you know how to speak Chinese?"
There was practically a human traffic jam, shimmying through tons of people is very difficult. Especially when it seemed every each they moved took ten minutes. What happened? Last time they were around this area it was a very loose place to be, it seemed like they multiplied in less than a day.
"Juvia! Do you think you can cry and drown everyone around us so we can get by? Just don't kill them." Juvia looked down in realization, "Why didn't Juvia think of that?" Juvia raised her hands and water flooded the street and people started swimming by, Juvia made a air bubble so they could breathe while underneath the water.
"I'm actually more curious now, what exactly happened at the club?" Lucy asked, hearing about it earlier this morning made her question. "Well, Juvia doesn't have it all down since Juvia was protecting Gray-sama from other girls. Though Juvia remembers Erza dancing with plenty of guys, Gray-sama in a drinking contest with Juvia, Lucy dancing with any guy she could see then street dancing then getting called into a dance competition with Erza, winning, then you and Natsu flirting and dancing together. Juvia learned Natsu is very perverted, he stared at your breast for quite some time."
"Well then, how did I end up in a hotel in my lingerie, Erza in a cat costume, and you wearing a flamingo?" "Juvia saw you take someone with us but he left after five minutes so you stripped out of your clothes and passed out, Erza was playing with a cat she found that turned out to have rabies and changed her outfit to that. Juvia was wearing a flamingo costume because Erza made Juvia, the cat had no food so Juvia was a sacrifice. Juvia would have stayed by Gray-sama's side but he said to watch you guys before he passed out from excessive alcohol."
"Oh, we're here." Lucy opened the door as soon as Juvia dropped the water, she was met with a weird sight.
Natsu was wobbling around babbling nonsense about how boobs will take over the world and how he had no problem with that, no second later he collapsed. Gray was just sitting on the floor with cats licking his face, staring at a puddle of liquid. "Did I kill Juvia? I think I did. Are cats licking my face? Yes they are, boy I'm a retard for letting this happen."
"Gray," Natsu said as he lifted his face from the ground. "Shut up, that's cat pee and beer." He turned his face to the closet. "Is Happy in there? I hear mumblings of 'Carla'."
Lucy walked towards the closet and opened the door, surely enough Happy was snuggling with a fish mumbling Carla's name. "Oh Luce, your here!" Natsu shouted excitedly as he stood up. "How are you? Care for some tea?" Natsu asked. Erza walked over to Gray and punched him. "On my way back here, I noticed some naked people... You should know what will happen."
"Actually, I could go for some tea." Lucy sat down at the empty bar next to Natsu. "Hopefully spiked tea." "NO MORE BEER!" Erza roared.
"Awww... your no fun."
An hour later
"Natsu, you should totally have these-" Lucy pointed to her breast. "This is the nicest thing any man can get!" Natsu grinned widely as he leaned on Lucy's shoulder due to being drunk again. "Thank you! You're my best friend!"
"... Wait a minute... are we talking about the same thing? You growing your own boobs or are you planning on taking mine?" Lucy asked confused. "I'm taking yours you weirdo!" Natsu tried to grope Lucy but he was smacked in the back of his head instead. "I need these!" "Can't I have them for a minute?" "NO!"
Thanks for reading... vote for the next character Lucy spends her drunk time with.
~Sen'ninriki says peace
