July, 2012. St. Louis, Missouri

The harsh sun rays beating down on her was already enough to make her want to retreat back into the sweet coolness of her hotel room. Sweat had already begun to bead down her back and on her chest, creating damp spots that could surely be spotted by anyone if it isn't taken care of that instant. Great, just what she needed to start the day; she really chose a bad time to wear a white cardigan. The burning, angry orb in the sky caused her to squint as she tried finding where she had parked at, it was so bright outside it was damn near blinding. Mother Nature had certainly shown no mercy this morning and Rebecca cursed it; why today of all days? After going around and back and forth, pressing the lock button non-stop and listening for the tell-tale beep for what felt like a half hour, she finally found her rental and unlocked the door, making a dash for it. The door flew open and she all but tossed her laptop bag and her purse into the passenger seat before climbing in herself and immediately cranking the A/C to blast once the car was on; she relished in the feeling of the cool air hitting her now damp skin, which created an even cooler feeling that felt incredibly relieving. Sweat had made her hand that held her key tightly all gross and moist; she grimaced and wiped both hands onto her dark grey slacks in hopes of drying them enough to handle the wheel.

Finally she was well on her way to the campus and with what looked like time to spare. With the GPS guiding her to the fastest route, she decided to make a small pit stop at a Starbucks; there was no way she could start the day without her morning caffeine hit. Normally she would try to resist it when she was crunched for time; but with how this morning was going she would certainly make an exception. Tongue poking through her teeth as she searched left and right for the nearest one, she spotted it and quickly but carefully guided her car in that direction; much to what she percieves as dismay from the woman on the GPS. The line was quite long, coming as no surprise to her considering the time; but she was determined. She waited in the back of the line, deciding to enjoy the now almost too cool air in her car while she can. The radio was playing some generic, light 80s music, which she settled for. Not that she was very picky in the first place; at this point her mind was set on just getting through the day. The time states she had about 30 minutes to get to the campus and the line was moving at a snail's pace.

"We can make it." She said to herself in the rear view mirror and attempted a smirk. Unfortunately, the stress on her face completely foiled her attempt at looking remotely confident; the kids would love her. A closer look and she could see how little sleep she had gotten, her bags dark and deep, eyes bloodshot and her skin paler than usual. She crinkled her freckled nose in disappointment and looked away.

Sighing in defeat she looked forward and inched ahead slowly when there was space. She leaned back in her seat and began to fidget mindlessly, her itching anxiety, which had begun the moment she woke up, was starting to get the best of her again. Swallowing hard, she took a few deep breaths and soon found herself carelessly fiddling with the silver chain around her neck; fingers dancing across the bead like chain and pulling it lightly back and forth, creating enough friction on her neck with it where it began to heat up her skin underneath, eyebrows furrowed deep in thought, paying no mind to her actions as it wandered further and further away from her. Her hand soon went low enough on the chain to touch the little engraved plates, the same ones that she had gotten so used to grazing her fingertips over; it was then she realized what she was doing. Immediately she brought her hands to the steering wheel and forced herself to focus; treating herself like as if she were a child playing with something she had no business playing with.

'We were done with that Rebecca' she chastised herself. 'You said after today we were done..' another voice that didn't sound like her own had retorted; she paused and thought back to the night before and how she caused herself nothing but grief over the damn things. It took her a moment to ponder it before mumbling and allowing herself to go back to doing what seemed to be some form of coping mechanism.

Could it really be that? Is it just coping?Well, she did always have a fidgeting issue growing up; her mother would always scold her for biting her nails when she was studying, or playing with her hair when speaking to authoritative figures. So in a way, she guessed it was.

'Cool, but now you're a little obsessive with a chain that belongs to someone that might as well be a fucking ghost.'

Ouch. With that last unpleasant thought she dropped the chain, allowing the plates to smack against her clothed chest, and brought her hands back to the steering wheel, squeezing tightly until her knuckles turned white. Much to her relief, the line was finally moving at a faster pace and she couldn't have asked for better timing. Sometimes, with as brilliant as her mind can be; it was also the most terrifying place to get lost in. Once she finally got her treat from the barista at the window that she seeked, she left the drive thru and sped out of the parking lot making her way to the University in a timely manner.

Small, quick steps echoed in the near empty hall that still smelled like lemon pledge from what must have been the janitor mopping earlier. The scent hitting her as she had gone through the double doors at the front of school and it had persisted in following her as she made her way through the building. Eyes darting back and forth feverishly, she searched for the door number she was given from the front office. The light blues of the halls made her a little dizzy with how they blended in with the just as blue lockers. Once upon finding the lecture hall, she gave a light but sound knock before opening the door. She was greeted by a balding, heavy set man with a weary smile. She returned the smile and half-heartedly presented her laptop bag that hung from her shoulder.

"I'm here." She said with a tune. The man nodded and walked toward her to shake her hand.

"Ah, Professor Chambers, thank you so much for taking the time to come out here and speak with us. Its good to meet you finally." The man attempted to sound cheery but his tired eyes failed him, he looked nearly as bad as she felt. She feigned the same sentiment and beamed as brightly as she could muster. "Its great to be here, I'm eager to speak with the students."

For now, the hall was empty; which allowed Rebecca to set herself up at the front of the room, connecting the laptop to the projecter and ensuring the clicker was receiving well and there wouldn't be any delays. The room was fairly large, allowing ample seats and space for the students but also causing some concern that it wouldn't be filled completely. Not that it really mattered to her, the money was good enough just for her to show up. Once she decided that she was all set, she stood by the podium and sipped at her coffee, which brought a small smile to her face. The whip cream and bits of sprinkle giving her that good bit of dopamine she needed. She looked at the tired professor and shrugged, the smile never leaving her face. "So now we wait."

Soon enough, students piled in and found their seats, some coming in the last few minutes before she was supposed to begin. She eyed the professor carefully as he strode in front of the now seated class and greeted everyone. He reminded everyone that this would be counted toward their participation in the class and he expected them all to be fully engaged. Rebecca nodded along following his tone as she waited for her cue.

"Now, without further ado, I give the floor to Professor Chambers." Rebecca gave her winning smile and stepped forward to give her own greeting as well before beginning her presentation. Starting with a hook-in opening that may or may not have actually worked; she went into auto-pilot, her mouth moving before her mind could fully understand what she herself was saying. It was all a special science in itself, something she had perfected over the years since she began taking speaking roles. Sure, the subject itself would sometimes change, but it was always something she was very knowledgeable in especially with her background. Pacing the room, maintaining eye contact with each student at a time, taking only seconds to peak at her outline on the desk and hardly if ever looking at her own PowerPoint; there was a reason why she was always called to these things. Once she had completed her lecture, she paused and looked around the room, taking in all the tired but interested faces.

"Any questions?" She asked cheerfully, shooting a bright smile. A few hands shot up simultaneously and chuckled; she figured as much. After answering each and every question, sometimes repeating herself multiple times or rehashing something, the presentation was over. "If nothing else, then I thank you for your time and I wish you guys luck on the rest of your semester."

Rebecca steps to the side and the professor speaks with the class briefly, giving his final words before dismissing them. The students were then filing out in a quick flurry, some in a hurry to get to their next class or to go home. Tossing her now empty coffee cup, she began to gather her things and said goodbye to the students that passed the podium to thank her for the lesson. Laptop bag in tow with everything inside, she threw her purse over her shoulder and walked up to the professor standing by the door. "Thank you for having me here, it was a pleasure."

He extended his own hand and gave her a much brighter grin than he had early that morning, the coffee probably finally kicking in. "Thank you again Professor, really; you had the class' undivided attention and I'm sure your lecture will stick with them for the remainder of the semester" he gave a hearty chuckle. "That is as long as the alcohol doesn't make 'em forget it all." She forced a laugh and nodded along, quickly excusing herself.

Making her way down the halls, she attempted to dodge the suddenly heavy traffic but with little success. She pursed her lips together and looked around, everyone seemed to be far taller than her and it made moving much more difficult when she couldn't even see. She groaned and settled for standing by a water fountain in an indentation of the wall until the halls somewhat cleared. With every visit she made to a school, the less she missed when she was a student herself. Granted, she hasn't been a student since she was 18; it still help stomp out whatever nostalgia she could have held. Once the hall seemed navigatable, she made her way out of the school and head for her rental. Once in, she took a deep breath and checks the time; it was only 11:20. She tapped at the steering wheel and thought about her options. Her job was done and her flight wasn't until the next day. Biting her lip, she shrugged and whipped out her phone.

"Let's see what St. Louis has to offer."