Jasper's sixteenth birthday threw him into an emotional tail spin. He felt like he was sat upon a horse, and it began to buck furiously; trying to knock Jasper to the ground; but somehow his father was holding him to that horse with Iron fists or something of the sort and just watched as Jasper flung about. His stomach was caught in his throat and he was gasping for air.
This past year had been a rough ride for the Whitlock's, well techincally for Jasper and his mother. Jasper's mother had become more emotionally detached then before, and it nearly ripped Jasper's heart from his chest. His father decided that his little brain prodding, emotional tourment wasn't quite enough; to punish his wife for being the stupid bitch she was; those were his words not Jasper's.
Jasper wished everyday since before he could remember that he could make him Mama happy, he swore to everything that was holy that if his Mama could be happy he would give his life.
His father had become meaner, more bitter, and more addicted to the whiskey he keep around the house. His nightly screaming at his wife, had made Jasper feel like a coward, hiding in his room, biting the inside of his cheek and making blood pool into his mouth. Jasper refused to show emotion. But late at night, he could share one emotion with himself. Fear. He knew at that point he was techincally a teenager, and he was just being silly, acting like a scared girl. Worried that one day his father would become so damn beligerant and snap, killing is mother and Jasper with his bare hands.
Jasper didn't have anyone to rationalize his fears with, because no one understood what he was going through. His father mocking him day in and day out. Jasper knew he could handle it, he knew he had to; his mother was a different story.
Jasper was awaken before the sun even rose on his birthday, his father nearly tossing him off his bed. Jasper could already tell that his father had already started with his vice this morning. Jasper's father hollered for him to get up, get dressed and get outside.
"Just because it's you damn birthday doesn't mean you get you sit on your ass all day. Two more years till your a man and you better prepare yourself to be one."
Jasper didn't have time to rub the sleep from his eyes, as he rushed to get out the door, and start doing work outside. He saw his mother sitting at the kitchen table cradling her arm, and when she looked up as he passed her eyes held nothing. No life at all. His father left for work an hour later already half way drunk.
The sun was already at it's highest point in the sky, when Jasper's mama called him into the house. She laid out small lunch and a glass of iced tea.
"Happy Birthday, baby. Eat up. I know you have to be starving."
To be honest, Jasper was. But he shook his head as he took a bite of his food.
"Ma, you didn't have to go about making me food. I would have came in and made it, if i needed to."
"No, baby. It's alright. It's your birthday. Just eat up and get out the kitchen or you'll ruin your suprise."
Jasper smiled up at his mother, and she smiled back wiping her hands on her apron.
Jasper wished it was like this, just the two of them. Not having to worry about the fury that his father brought home everyday.
The day went on without a worry, Jasper worked outside, and his mother kept him out the kitchen. He knew that she was making him a small cake, about the size of both his fists. She did that every year, it was a tradition of sorts, and Jasper never asked for anything more. He didn't ask for presents, he didn't ask for money, he didn't ask for much of anything actually. He was happy with a cake, but he never seemed to get more than one bite of it, swallowed before everything went to hell.
Jasper had prepared himself for the same thing to happen this year. His father coming home drunk, complaing about the food, saying that both his wife and son was good for nothing, telling Jasper that his birthday was nothing to celebrate. Then the hollerin started.
This year was no different. Just as Jasper swallowed his first piece of cake, and was ready to put another in his mouth his father slammed the plate to the floor and let out a laugh. His mother flinched as the pieces of plates went flying and Jasper bit his cheek.
"You are good for nothing." He started nearly knocking the table over when he pounded his fist on it. His chair clattered to the floor as he stood up and grabbed his wife by the arm.
"You slave away in my kitchen, in my house, making a cake for him." He spat pointing a chubby finger in Jasper's direction. His mother mouthed leave the room, and as much as he wanted to stay, he got up a fleed. He heard the crashes from downstairs, and her cries; as he tried to block it out. Tried to stop feeling the pain running through his veins, the anger thudding inside his heart; the terror that shook his whole body.
Jasper hated himself for being so scared.
His mother for letting this happen.
But most of all he hated his father for doing this, and that hate ran through his whole body.
