'i just don't want to forget you'

He left her on that desert planet years ago, wiping her memory so no one could ever know, would ever know that this little orphaned scavenger was the secret weakness of the mighty Kylo Ren.

When he remembers her face then and now all he can see are the tough smiles and the rough lines that Jakku, with all its hate, has pressed upon her. The days with no food and the ones with no rest and the ones with no love. Each of them is scratched into her wall, marks and marks and marks made with careful precision all yelling out 'someday he'll be back'.

He can almost see it when he looks into her mind—far more than starvation, it was the loneliness that almost broke her soul.

Seeing her pain almost breaks him.