She's walking through the auditorium, taking small, measured steps as she makes her way to the stage and up the stairs, walking towards the young girl sitting on the piano. Rachel knows that her presence is evident, but Quinn still refuses to look up.

"Hi Quinn," she says quietly. She finally looks up with a small smile on her face. But it doesn't quite reach her eyes, and Rachel doesn't know what to make of it. "You wanted to see me?"

"Yeah," Quinn answers, shuffling to the left of the bench and patting the space next to her. "Sit."

Rachel shoots her a nervous smile, carefully sitting on the farthest end. She doesn't know what's going on and she's wary. She's been wary ever since she found the note slipped into her locker ten minutes ago, Quinn's small, cursive writing requesting for Rachel to meet her here.

"So, what's up?"

Quinn doesn't answer, choosing instead to play a little note on the piano. Rachel looks around uncomfortably, noting the dark lighting of the auditorium and the deafening silence, broken only by Quinn's choppy version of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

"This is Beth's favorite song you know," Quinn tells her. She nods. Okay. Quinn laughs, shaking her head. "You should hear Finn sometimes in the middle of the night. It's like she wouldn't shut up until he sings to her."

Her hands grip the sides of her skirt tightly before she even realizes it, that dull throb in her chest making itself evident yet again.

"What do you want Quinn?"

"Finn told me you were planning to write a song for Regionals this year. You know, back when you begged him to come back to Glee?"

Her words are calm, but Rachel feels the underlining hostility that drips from her sweet tone. She takes a deep breath.

"I want both of you to come back-"

"Well we can't!" Quinn says sharply, startling Rachel when closes the piano with a loud bang as she turns to glare at the smaller girl. "We have Beth to look after, and Finn has to work when he's not playing football, so-"

"He loves Glee-" she tries to argue but Quinn cuts her off.

"We can't always get what we want, Rachel. You should know that more than anyone."

She turns away from the pointed look currently aimed at her.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh please," Quinn scoffs. "You think I don't see you, throwing yourself at him? It's pathetic, and everybody knows that Finn is just too nice to let you down easy."

"That's not-" she starts, but is cut off yet again as Quinn laughs derisively.

"Do you actually think he'll ever choose you over me? Over Beth?"

She doesn't. Not really. She never did.

"Quinn I-"

"I called you here, to tell you to leave my family alone."

"I didn't do anything-"

"God, what is wrong with you!" Quinn yells as she finally stands, her composure lost. Rachel looks up at her, wide-eyed. The blonde girl's eyes are wide and angry as she stares her down. "You can get out of here. You- you're talented, Rachel. When high school is over and you go to New York, you're going to be successful, because you have what it takes. Why are you so hung up on some small town boy like Finn?"

Rachel feels her ire finally seeping through her nerves as she glares up at Quinn.

"Finn is not a small town-"

"He is, Rachel, okay? God, stop living in this stupid fantasy world where you think that everybody is exactly the way you want them to be. Finn belongs in Lima. With me. With Beth. And you don't. You never have. And- and in five, ten years from now, that'll still be true. And you'll be in New York and be on Broadway or whatever the hell it is you want to do, and Finn, Finn will still be here with me. He'll take over Burt's garage, and I'll- I'll be a real estate agent and we'll have a small house of our own for our small town lives and hey, maybe Beth will have a little sister, maybe she won't. But you know what won't happen, Rachel?" Quinn finishes, her voice going lower as she leans closer towards Rachel.

"What won't happen, is you and Finn. That will never, happen."

She doesn't say a word as Quinn's breath warms her face, stifling her. It feels like a slap to the face, this future that's been painted so clearly for her.

"Get this through your head Rachel. I get Finn, and you get heartbroken. He will never leave me. He will never leave his daughter. Do you hear me?"

Quinn is breathing hard as she waits for an answer, and she tries her best to steel herself from the tremors that are threatening to overtake her.

"Glee misses you Quinn. We need you, we need Finn, if we want to make it in Sectionals this year. We're a family, and I hope you hear that."

She stands quickly, turning on her heel without so much as a goodbye as she walks down the stage, composed. She stops herself from shedding a single tear until the auditorium door is shut firmly behind her.

xxx

Her eyes are wide in the dark as the memory presses against her.

Quinn's gone. Quinn's dead and God, what is wrong with her that, in finding this out, all she can think about was that moment? What kind of person is she to be thinking about this when her friend, or as much of a friend as Quinn had been, has passed?

Quinn is gone.

She can't wrap her mind around this.

Pushing her covers off her body, she sits up, looking at the alarm clock on her night stand to find that it's only four in the morning. She sighs, knowing that sleep is impossible as she stands, stretching.

Her mind has decided that it would like to pull out every single memory she's been keeping under lock and key, and it won't shut down no matter how hard she tries to get it to. She can't. Even the sleeping pills aren't working.

Her gaze falls onto the plastic cup collecting dust on the third shelf of her bookcase and sighs, resigning once again to her memories. The plastic gold star that was pasted on it is starting to fade.

Xxx

She went home first after Regionals was over to clean up. She went home to weep, really, alone in her big house without her parents who are both away on a business trip. And wept she did, as the bus stopped just in front of her house. She hadn't bothered waving, nobody bothered to acknowledge anyone after all that had happened.

She sits on the kitchen stool, now freshly showered, her eyes bloodshot because she couldn't stop crying as the water had beat down on her head. She stares dumbly down at the cereal she had poured. She's not hungry. She just can't get over it.

The look on Jesse's face, the way he had completely sidelined her and walked up to claim that trophy. But what else did she expect? That he'd apologized? He made it abundantly clear when he returned to Vocal Adrenaline without a word that it was all just an act for him, his biggest role to date really. Pretending to love the girl while spying on her for her birth mother. She'll bet he and Shelby had many an entertaining night over that one, and the way she fell for it like the idiot that she was.

But what was worse was the way Shelby had refused to look at her. She's leaving. Her mother is leaving after spending almost six months looking for her only to realize she never really wanted her. Her own mother doesn't want her. What does that say about her, really? Rachel Berry, failed Glee club leader, failed daughter, just a failure all around.

I believe in you.

Finn. He's going to be so disappointed when he finds out. She shakes her head, pinching her temple when she remembers the moment Quinn's water had broken. It had been a frenzy, he had been a mess, and he hadn't calmed down until she had taken his hand, soothingly telling him that things were going to be okay while Quinn screamed expletives at him from across the room. Poor Finn, with a baby now out in the world. She wonders if he knows that they've lost. He didn't come back with the rest of them, of course.

She hasn't seen the baby yet. Elizabeth. Quinn wanted to call her Beth, just Beth, but Finn had insisted, claiming that Beth is not a complete name. Rachel's stomach rolls as she wonders if she looks like him, Elizabeth. Does she have his warm, brown eyes and beautiful nose? Does she have his freckles? Will she be tall like him? Maybe she'll look like Quinn, which is better, really, because Quinn is the most beautiful girl Rachel has ever known. She smiles, barely. She'd like to see a baby that looks like Finn. She'll probably be the most adorable baby in the whole world.

Rachel pushes the bowl of cereal away, leaning her head against the cool marble of her kitchen counter, the slight smile growing on her face as she remembered their duet.

"Break a leg," she had told him, and he'd smiled, taking her hand for one brief moment when he looked her in the eye.

"We're going to kill this thing Rach. I believe in you."

And the thing is they did. They did kill it. It was just that Vocal Adrenaline's performance was flawless, at least on the surface, just like Jesse had been. It had been flawless, and heartless, and it had dazzled, and they didn't really stand a chance. She knew it when she saw them.

Her decision is made for her before she even realizes it, as she runs up to her room for her car keys. It's almost midnight, and she's never been out this late before, but as she pulls out of the driveway and head for the hospital, she decides that there's nowhere else she'd rather be. It doesn't hit her that it was too late for visiting until she's almost there. Groaning, Rachel curses herself, getting ready to go through the lobby to turn back around, when she sees a familiar figure, leaning against the wall outside of the hospital. She slows down her car until it stops in front of him, cranking down her window.

"Finn," she calls out. He had his eyes closed, head leaned back against the wall and when she called him, his eyes bleared open in surprise.

"Rachel?" he says, almost confused. "What are you doing here?"

"I- I came to see Elizabeth."

"Now?"

"I know. I wasn't really thinking straight. I was about to turn around actually, when I saw you. I'm sorry if I'm intruding on anything I just-"

"Rachel." Her nerves calm at the amusement in his tone. "Relax."

She smiles at him, giggling. He walks towards her, opening the door and folding himself inside.

"C'mon," he says.

"Where are we going?"

"To park your car. You wanted to see Elizabeth, right?"

"I could have parked on my own," she tells him, amused. He shrugs.

"I know. But it's dark out, I just wanna make sure you're okay."

He smiles that crooked little smile, the one that never fails to stop her heart (like every other smile of his), the one she thought she'd finally be immune to when Jesse came along. Now Jesse's gone, and she's still very much affected by it. Despite her heartache, the fact that he's going out of his way to accompany her makes her smile.

"Thanks Finn."

The hospital is quiet as they make their way up to the maternity ward, walking side by side in silence. It's awkward to be alone with him at this hour, and it's even more awkward when she takes into account where they're headed to. He takes her up to nursery, and she's never known him to be so quiet before as he takes small steps up to the glass window, turning to her and smiling in excitement.

"See that one over there? In the pink blanket like, one row back? That's her."

She stares in awe at the bundle he points to. From where she's standing she can barely see her, but Elizabeth makes a small movement and she holds her breath.

"She's beautiful Finn," she breathes. She feels him shuffling next to her.

"Yeah. She looks nothing like me."

"Really?"

"Yep. I mean, she has Quinn's eyes, and everything. I can't see me anywhere."

"Maybe she'll be tall like you."

"Yeah, maybe."

She stares quietly at the prone figure, and she doesn't know how such a small, immobile thing could be as enchanting as Elizabeth is. She doesn't notice how he's looking at her.

"What's wrong Rach?" he asks quietly. She stiffens considerably at his question, refusing to acknowledge it.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, it's nice that you want to see Elizabeth and all, but it's kinda weird that you're here right now, and you just- you look really sad."

"I-"

"Is it because we lost?"

So he knows.

"No. I mean, yes it's that too, but-"

"But what?" he asks quietly. She looks up at him, the feeling she's trying to bottle up rising just beneath the surface of her skin.

"My mom is leaving Finn" she blurts out, ignoring the way he raises an eyebrow. She looks back towards the nursery, and she wonders if Shelby had ever seen her this way. Or did she just leave without looking back at all? "She told me at Regionals. She's moving to New York and she's leaving me, again, because she doesn't want me, again. And I just- I don't understand! I don't understand why she doesn't want me because- because Quinn, wants Elizabeth and- and you- you want her, right? You're gonna keep her, right?"

She turns to him, and the tears are already falling down her face before she realizes it. The look on his face just makes it worse. She wipes her face clean with the sleeve of her sweatshirt.

"I- I'm sorry. I-"

Her eyes widen when he comes closer, enclosing her in his long arms as he pulls her close and she's engulfed in his scent, her face pressed against his dress shirt. He still hasn't changed out of them. Slowly, her arms circle his back, fingers gripping into the fabric of his shirt as she trembles.

"You know I was a mess right?" he whispers, his lips grazing the top of her forehead. "Back in the changing room, when Quinn's water broke, I freaked the fuck out. I mean, it wasn't just 'cause the baby was coming, but like, what the hell am I going to do now? Because this is real, and this is happening, but- but you told me, that it was going to be okay, that I was going to be okay. And I believed you. I mean, I don't know how it's gonna be, but it will. I believed you Rachel. So like, like believe me when I tell you it's gonna be okay. Okay?"

She doesn't say a word and his arms around her tighten.

"Okay?" he asks again. She doesn't know how it will be, how anything will ever be okay again, because Shelby's gone and Jesse's gone and Glee is gone and Finn. Finn has Elizabeth. Finn's still here, but she feels like he won't be for long. Slowly, she nods.

"Okay" she mumbles, pressing her face into his chest as she tightens her arms around him. She feels his fingers in her hair, smoothing out the back of her head, and it calms her, more than anything else.

She believes him.

She doesn't want to pull back, but when he releases her, she's forced to do the same, looking up at his smiling face.

"Good. So hey, wanna go get something to eat? Quinn's probably still passed out and I'm super hungry, and I think I saw a 24/7 diner on the way."

She grins, shaking her head.

"Finn, it's almost one. And I'm in a sweatshirt and yoga pants."

"I noticed," he answers, grinning. She giggles, allowing him to put an arm around her. He smiles at her, that small, quiet smile she rarely ever sees on him, the one she likes to fool herself into thinking is only for her.

"Okay."

xxx

She hates remembering. She hates thinking about the way they were.

She knows that she's the one who ruined everything.

She was the one who left. And from the way he had acted yesterday, she knows he won't let her forget it.

Xxx

She'll spend her days wisely, she decides, once she realizes that there are only seven days before the party, taking out her homemade party planner the moment she reached home to discuss with her fathers on what they want. They've been very vague so far, which frustrates her, because how is she supposed to throw the perfect 27th anniversary bash when she doesn't even know what they want and they keep trying to distract her attention away from the matter at hand?

Suffice it to say, she has her hands full, too full to even care about the fact that he hasn't tried to contact her at all in the last three days. It's not like she's expecting him to. After all, she came back here with absolutely no intention of catching up with anyone.

But Beth has. In fact, the night of her arrival itself, Beth had called her up to offer her creative services once again. Rachel almost had a heart attack, and Drizzle had stared at her witheringly when she carefully answered the phone after lunging for it earlier.

"Hello?"

"Hi Rachel!"

"Oh. Hi Beth," she answered, recovering quickly with a smile.

"So do you know what you're doing for the party yet? Hold on- I'm talking to Rachel dad! No I'm not! I'm not bothering you right?"

"Not at all, Actually-"

"She says I'm not bothering her! I know dad. I know dad. Sorry Rachel. Dad keeps telling me I need to get ready for Uncle Puck's barbecue. He hasn't even had his shower yet," Beth finishes in a whisper. In the background, Rachel heard him yelling Beth's name in exasperation. Laughing, she shook her head.

"It's no problem. I was just about to say Beth, that I would really appreciate any suggestions you might have. "

"Really?"

"Really. I'm going to tell you a secret okay? Promise you won't tell anyone," she said conspiratorially in a quiet voice.

"I swear."

"I've never planned a party before. I don't really know what I'm doing."

It was quiet on the other end for a while before Beth spoke again.

"I can totally help you Rachel. I mean, I plan parties all the time, for like, dad's birthday and Grandma's and Grandpa's. I even helped dad plan Uncle Kurt's surprise party last year, and the only thing he really liked about it was the Broadway theme, and I came up with that."

"You came up with a Broadway themed birthday party?" she asks, impressed.

"Yeah, 'cause uncle Kurt likes those kinda things. Anyway, I can help you plan it."

"That'll be great Beth."

So imagine her surprise, when at four in the evening, and she's busily poring over pages after pages cabaret themed magazines, Beth shows up, smiling at her in front of her door with her hands shoved in the pockets of her jeans.

"Hi!" she says brightly.

"Hello," Rachel answers, smiling a little cautiously. "How did you get here? Is your father here?" she asks, craning her neck to look for his truck.

"Nah. I came on my bike. He's at the autoshop right now, managing stuff or something, and I just thought I'd come see if you need any help. Sorry I didn't call, but dad had the phone with him and I didn't memorize your number, so I couldn't use the house phone to call you."

"Come in," Rachel says, once she realizes that she's letting the eleven year old just stand on her porch. "Does your dad know you're here?"

"Nope. But he knows I like to just ride my bike around town sometimes, so it's fine."

"Isn't that dangerous?" Rachel asks, raising an eyebrow as she makes her way back to the living room.

"Nah," Beth says, shrugging her shoulders. "It's Lima, nothing ever happens here anyway. 'Sides, my dad says that a little adventure can be good for me, and I like riding my bike. Dad bought it for me two years ago after mom died."

She doesn't know how to respond to that, so she just smiles, motioning for the little girl to sit on the couch next to her.

"I'll just give Finn a call, to tell him you're with me, okay?"

"Sure."

"Hey, why don't you take a look at those magazines on the coffee table. Maybe you can help me think of something?"

"Cool."

She moves to the kitchen, holding her phone up to her ear as she waits for him to pick up. She doesn't even know why she'd holding her breath really. She's being ridiculous.

"Rachel?"

His tone is confused, and she can't tell by that one word whether he's glad she called. She's being stupid. It doesn't even matter either way.

"Hi Finn. I just wanted to tell you that Beth's here, at my house."

"What is she doing there?" he asks, again with that confused tone that almost makes her roll her eyes.

"She's helping me plan my fathers' party," she answers brightly instead. It's a little quiet on the other end before he hears him sigh.

"Rachel, you don't have to do this."

Now she's the confused one.

"What-"

"If she's bothering you, I'll come pick her up. You don't have to feel sorry for us, okay?"

"I'm not-"

"She's fine. We're fine." His hard tone takes her by surprise when she cranes her neck to see Beth hard at work, flipping through the pages.

"I'm sure you are," she answers carefully. "But I don't know why this means that I'm feeling sorry for you, because if I remember correctly Finn, all I said was that she's helping me, which I appreciate very much for that matter, because I actually do need it."

She doesn't mean to sound as defensive as she does, but with the tension that's already between them, she really can't afford another misunderstanding right now. She hears him take an even longer sigh and braces herself.

"I'm sorry," he says. Is she hearing him right? He's apologizing?

"I just- Beth can get a little too attached sometimes, and people think they're being nice when they humor her, but they're really just-" he groans. "And my mom's been ragging on me about how she needs a female influence and that's why she's this way, and I just- I don't know what I'm supposed to do about it- shit!"

"Finn, are you okay?" she asks, alarmed. Her heart is racing, because she doesn't think he even realized that he was opening up to her.

"I'm fine. I'm fine. Just this damn hubcap. Louis! I told you to move it, not in the middle of the pathway."

She giggles when she hears someone apologizing profusely, noting how much Beth is like him. They both love to yell at other people while on the phone with someone else.

"Sorry. Sorry, Rachel. I didn't mean to take it out on you. I just-"

"You just have a lot going on. It's okay, I get it. But I swear Finn, on Barbra herself, that all I want is to borrow your daughter for her expertise," she jokes. He chuckles on the other end, and her heart flutters at the sound.

"I might have to charge you by the hour," he jokes.

"Let's settle for dinner. I'll even throw in meat for her."

"Thanks Rachel," he says, a little more quietly.

"I didn't do anything," she murmurs.

She hangs up, entering the living room to find Drizzle curled up on Beth's lap.

"What are you doing there?" she asks, smiling at the way Beth absent-mindedly runs her fingers on his belly. She'd bet Drizzle's in high heaven now. Beth looks up at her and smiles.

"Is this your cat? What's his name?"

"Drizzle."

"No way! Really? That's what dad calls me all the time."

"Is that so?" she asks, feigning surprise, her heart warming at the excited way Beth is hugging Drizzle to her.

"Uh-huh. Mom hated it though. So he used to do it only when she wasn't around."

Rachel notes the slight frown on the little girl's face as she sits next to Beth. This is awkward. She still doesn't know exactly what to do.

"Do you," she starts tentatively, reaching out for another magazine to leaf through. "Do you miss her?"

Beth shrugs.

"I guess. "

She doesn't say anything else to that, instead pointing out to a page on Cabaret costumes, which made Rachel blush, momentarily forgetting her question. She laughs ruefully.

"I just realized that Cabaret might be a little too mature for you," she tells Beth uncomfortably. She doesn't have much experience with children, but honesty is always the best policy right? Beth scoffs at her to her surprise.

"I hang out with Uncle Puck a lot. He's way worse," Beth tells her. Rachel shakes her head.

"I'll bet he is."

"Yeah, dad always tells him to cut it out when I'm around, but the other day, he left this magazine in his toilet-"

"Oh God," Rachel cuts in, embarrassed. "Suffice it to say that cabaret is fine with you."

Beth grins at her.

"Mom used to say that Uncle Puck was hopeless, whatever that meant."

"Is it always just you and your dad?"

"And Uncle Puck."

"And Uncle Puck?"

"Yeah. I mean, sometimes there's one of his girlfriends too, and they're okay for like a day, but then they always get annoying, so I don't like them."

Rachel wonders what she means by that, taking into account what Finn said, but she doesn't take the conversation further.

"So I'm thinking, streamers," she says instead. "Red and black, right? What do you think?"

Beth's face lights up at that.

"I think we should have silver too, 'cause it like, blends with black and red, right? And it's pretty."

"That's a great idea Beth!" she compliments, grinning when the little girl blushes. From Beth's lap, Drizzle looks up lazily at Rachel, stretching himself.

"He likes you," she says. Drizzle looks up at her and smiles, her small fingers scratching the back of his head as she takes over the rest of the conversation.

Xxx

Beth stays until it's dark out, and Rachel would have taken her home, but Finn insisted that he would pick her up, so she says nothing to that, remembering his defensive stance earlier in the day. Her fathers were surprised to find a little girl at the dinner table, but they were delighted all the same ("Finn Hudson's daughter? Didn't you used to go to school with him?" She appreciates her daddy's ability to play dumb sometimes).

Beth seems to have taken a liking to Hiram, who keeps calling her "pretty green eyes", and complimented her horrendous braid ("Dad did it for me this morning."). She falls asleep against Rachel's shoulder when they're both in front of the television, watching a DVD of The Little Mermaid. Beth had rolled her eyes at the choice, but Rachel just really loves the movie, okay?

She stares at the younger girl when she sleeps, noting how very much she looks like her mother. Beth is a beauty, just like Quinn was. Slowly, she eases herself off the couch, pulling Beth to lay on it before covering her with a blanket.

She's furiously writing in her planner when the knock comes. Finn stands with his hands in his pockets, looking at her sheepishly.

"Sorry I'm so late," he apologizes before she could say a word. "There was this huge mess with a Toyota engine at about six o'clock, and Louis has his anniversary, and Todd's proposing to his girl or something, so I-"

"It's fine, Finn," she cuts in, smiling warmly up at him. He takes a deep breath, grinning down at her.

"She asleep?"

"She's on the couch. Come in." She's painfully aware of him behind her. The house is silent, she had turned off the TV, and now it's just awkward. "Have you even eaten anything?"

"Yeah, I had a hot pocket on the way over."

"I meant real food, Finn."

"That's real food." She rolls her eyes at his teasing tone.

"We have leftovers. I'll heat it up for you."

"No, no. That's okay."

"Oh," she says, feeling the tension coming back up again at his immediate rejection.

"I just- it's getting late, and Beth has school tomorrow. I mean, I'm sure it's great, whatever it is and I-"

She smiles at the way he flusters.

"I'll pack something for you," she tells him softly as they reach the living room. She's about to leave him there, making her way to the kitchen when she turns around to see him kneeling on the floor over his daughter.

"Hey," he whispers, one hand softly combing through Beth's hair. "Wake up Drizzle. C'mon baby girl, it's time to go."

She remembers eighteen, and the Captains' meeting they had after Glee, the way she had demonstrated their final dance number to him with Beth on his lap. She grins as she remembers his big hands carefully holding on to his daughter's, helping Beth clap once she was done with the routine. She knows Beth doesn't really remember her, or the way she used to call Rachel "Ray-ray" because she couldn't pronounce the name properly. It's weird to see them this way, a little surreal to see the little girl that she used to babysit for sometimes turning into an almost young woman.

She snaps out of her trance when Beth stretches, her eyes blinking open. Turning on her heels, Rachel proceeds into the kitchen, making herself busy with the tupperwares.

Finn has an armful of Beth, so she helps him carry the food out to his truck, waiting quietly on the side while he straps his daughter in before throwing her bicycle on to the bed of his truck.

"Thanks Rachel," he says, running his hand through his hair as he takes the bag of food from her.

"I didn't do anything," she insists.

"Well you saved me today," he jokes, "Even if you didn't know it. Andrew Carson is an ass, and I'm glad I don't have to attend to him now that his engine is running."

She smiles. He smiles back. She shuffles her feet back and forth.

"I-"

"Hey-"

They both stop, and he chuckles as he motions for her to continue. She smiles warmly up at him.

"She's wonderful Finn," she tells him earnestly. "I just- I just want you to know. She's a wonderful girl, and I think you're- you're doing a great job."

She sees his eyes softening, his small frown quickly turning into the softest of smiles. Her heart threatens to stop again, because she remembers this smile. She used to think it was hers. It surprises her when he takes her hand, enveloping her small one into his big, warm palm.

"I'm glad you're home Rachel," he says.

And she thinks he really means it.