Girl Talk

by Amy L. Hull

for commentfic meme at bertie456's LJ, in response to a prompt from bertie456

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"I feel disgusting."

Brennan didn't look up from the table where she was carefully arranging pieces of pelvis. "What's wrong?" she asked, her voice sounding a little bit strained from having her neck bent.

Angela waved a hand dismissively, but her lip curled as she said, "I have my period."

"Ah."

"Usually it's fine, but it's really heavy this month."

"That's never fun," Brennan said, still staring at the bones on her table.

Angela shifted one shoulder and tilted her head, her opposite hand massaging her neck. "Yeah. I've already gone through two pair of underwear this morning and my emergency pair most emphatically does inot/i go with these pants."

"Ms. Montenegro, do you really believe this conversation is suitable for a work environment?"

"Morning, Dr. Goodman. I didn't see you there," Angela said, a slightly awkward smile quirking her lips before she waved her hand again and muttered, "What the hell."

"How do certain underwear not 'go with' certain pants?" Zack asked, adding several bones to the growing skeleton.

"Well," Hodgins said, glancing from his computer screen to the group, "it could have to do with what she's planning to do later, though, if she's on the rag, that's less likely than..."

Dr. Goodman glared.

"Or it could just be color coordination. So, it looks like the clothing remnants were composed of linen, cotton, and wool fibers that were probably a shade of dark blue or purple."

"Thank you, Dr. Hodgins."

Brennan stood and interrupted her boss to say, "Sadly, that information is nearly useless. That combination of fibers and dye color doesn't even narrow us down to a century." She removed her safety glasses. "I'm fairly certain from the dental evidence that these remains are between one hundred thirty and one hundred eighty years old, but we'll have to wait for the carbon dating on the garment particles. Zack, let me know this afternoon what evidence you've found on the bones that gives information about person's life."

"Yes, Dr. Brennan."

Brennan removed her gloves. "Angela, have you thought of trying a menstrual cup? I started using one in college when doing extensive work far from modern conveniences and it's comfortable, convenient, and much better for the environment in terms of waste."

"Really? I've heard of things like a moon cup or a lady cup, but I never knew anyone who used one--"

"Ms. Montenegro? Is there any compelling reason you joined us that has to do with the work of this institution?"

"Not really. I got to work about an hour and a half ago, I'm uncomfortable, and I don't have much to work on, so I decided to take a walk."

"You went through two pair of underwear in an hour and a half? That sucks, man."

Angela turned to Hodgins' sympathetic tone. "Tell me about it, even if one was just on the way to work."

"I still don't understand how underwear 'go with' certain pants." Zack was walking around the table, surveying the skeleton.

"I've found that the fit of certain pants lends itself better to a certain cut of undergarments," Brennan offered. "Pants that are more tight-fitting seem more suited to underwear with less fabric. I find certain fabrics complement one another better as well, and tend to prefer to match the hand of the fabric of the two garments."

Zack looked up from the clavicle he was examining. "I see your point. I myself prefer briefs regardless of pants, but I can't imagine that tight-fitting pants would be comfortable with boxers."

"I'll be going now. Dr. Brennan, let me know if you learn anything further." Dr. Goodman straightened his tie as he walked away.

Hodgins and Angela exchanged glances, their eyes sparkling with humor. They contained themselves for only a little over a minute--until Dr. Goodman was out of earshot--and then cracked up.

"What?" Brennan asked.

"Did you see the ilook/i on his iface?/i" Hodgins gasped.

Angela just held a hand to her mouth, giggling. "I know. I mean, I think he turned a whole shade paler when Brennan said the word 'menstrual.'"

Brennan looked back and forth between the two of them and her mouth fell slightly open. "Okay, that was just mean."

They both attempted to pull straight faces, but kept giggling.

Brennan rolled her eyes. "Angela, were you at least serious? Because I can recommend..."

"I was, honey. I am. It's just that Goodman's such an easy mark."

"Because I can show you sites where you can shop for a cup."

"Okay." Angela waved to Hodgins as she followed Brennan off the platform.

Zack looked at their departing forms, then at Hodgins. He stood silently, frowning, then, just as Hodgins stood to leave, said, "Clearly I missed something. What was mean?"

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