A/N: I just wanted to thank everyone for the kind words and reviews! It means a lot. I have decided that I will turn this into a 5 chapter story. This is strictly Amanda x Olivia friendship. Sorry to all those "Rolivia" shippers. I have to admit, sometimes I find myself shipping them, but in this story I want to focus on Olivia being a mentor (so to speak) of Amanda's and a friend. Thank you all again. This chapter kind of bounces around a bit. Look for a new update within the next few days.
Hours later Amanda found herself sitting on Olivia's couch nursing a cup of coffee.
She starred at the steaming liquid, her mind wandering to all the events of the week.
"There are fresh towels in the bathroom and I put a stack of clothes in there. You can just find what fits best. The guest room is all made up, so make yourself at home." Olivia said returning from the bedroom, her hands clasped together.
"Thanks Olivia. I really appreciate this." Amanda said quietly, her eyes dark and rimmed with red circles.
"It's no problem. I'll be in my office doing some paperwork, so if you need anything at all, you know where to find me. Help yourself to anything in the house." Olivia said retreating into her office.
Amanda rose from the couch, dumping her coffee into the sink and rinsing out the mug.
She made her way to the bathroom.
She turned the shower to its hottest setting and stood under the raining jets, letting the burning water wash away the pain and betrayal.
Her momma always told her that a long shower is good for you, it helps clear the mind.
She made her way from the steamy bathroom into the guest room, pulling back the covers and crawling into the bed.
She tossed and turned, her mind racing.
She has no belongings, no clothes, no nothing. All she has are the clothes she wore that day, her purse, and that damn ice cube tray in the freezer.
She doesn't like imposing on others and what she hates even more then that, is pity. She hates when people pity her.
She's a cop for Christ's sake, things like this shouldn't happen.
She should have seen the signs, the web of lies, and the betrayal.
It was right under her nose and she was completely blinded.
Completely and utterly blinded.
She woke the next morning feeling better, sleeping in a jail cell isn't the coziest.
She padded her way out into the kitchen to find Olivia standing at the counter skimming the paper.
"Good morning." Olivia said, turning around when she heard the blonde walk in.
She handed her a mug of coffee.
"Thank you." Amanda said taking the mug from the brunette.
"No problem. Help yourself to anything in my closest. It should fit no problem." Olivia said sipping her coffee.
Amanda offered the brunette a slight smile.
They got ready for work and they headed out.
Hours later, Cragen had sent Amanda and Amaro to question some neighbors for a rape case.
He wanted to help her get back into the swing of things and thought she could get out for a bit.
Olivia found herself alone in the squad room working on paperwork.
"Liv." Cragen called from his office door, signaling her.
She rose from her chair and went into his office closing the door behind her.
"What's up Captain?" Olivia asked, crossing her arms in from of her chest and leaning on the armrest of the chair.
"We got a situation. Where's Rollins?" He asked.
"Last I knew she was going to question neighbors with Amaro for the McGuire case. They should be back soon." Olivia said.
"Call Amaro. Get them back here." Cragen said, his voice stern but laced with worry.
"Captain?" Olivia asked, sensing the severity of the situation.
"Tucker called. West Virginia police called and found Kim in a hotel room. She OD'd." Cragen said.
Olivia's head dropped and she let out the breath she was holding.
Amanda has been through so much this past week, Olivia wasn't sure how the blonde was going to handle the heart breaking news.
20 minutes later Rollins and Amaro entered the squad room.
She slid off her jacket and ran her hand through her hair.
"Rollins." Cragen called from his office, eyeing Olivia who followed the blonde into the office.
"What's going on?" She asked hesitantly as she entered the room.
Olivia placed her hand on the small of Amanda's back and guided her to a chair as she quietly closed the door behind them.
Olivia rested her hip on the corner of Cragen's desk in front of Rollins.
Cragen gave Olivia a nod and the brunette detective took a deep breath.
"Amanda- they found Kim. She OD'd in her hotel room in West Virginia. There was nothing they can do. I'm so sorry Amanda." Olivia said, her voice full of emotions.
"You take as much time off as you need Amanda. You've been through a lot, we are here to help you in anyway we can." Cragen said.
"No." Amanda said placing her hand on her head. She shook her head. "I don't need time off. I'm fine." She said holding her hand up in protest. "I just want to get back to work. I need some normalcy back in my life." She said rising from the chair.
"Amanda- you don't have to put on an exterior in front of us. It's okay to feel something- anything." Olivia said grabbing the blonde's arm as she turned towards the door.
"I'm fine." Amanda said flashing a southern smile at the brunette. "I'm gonna go finish the report for the McGuire case." She said exiting the office, closing the door behind her.
Olivia let out a loud audible sigh as she watched through the blinds as Amanda returned to her desk.
"Keep an eye on her Liv." Captain said as Olivia left the room.
She nodded and closed the door.
He collapsed back into his desk chair.
Over the past ten years his detectives have been through so much. From being framed for various crimes, loss of family members, and trouble with the law to sexual assaults, shootings, and stabbings. They've had on of their own turn on them. But they are a family and a family can survive anything.
Two days passed since Amanda got the news that her sister died.
She stayed clear of Olivia and the others and did her work to the book- as always.
They noticed she was extra quiet, but didn't want to crowd her so they let her have her space.
Olivia woke to find Amanda gone and when she entered the squad room an hour later she wasn't surprised to see the blonde sitting there, heavy bags under her eyes.
"You're early." Olivia said slipping off her coat and handing Amanda a cup of coffee.
"Thanks-" Amanda said sipping the Starbucks drink. "I actually have an idea about the McGuire case."
"Alright." Olivia said sitting down in her desk. "Let's hear it."
They spent the next 30 minutes talking about the case until the rest of the squad came in.
It seemed to be a typical day in the SVU squad room. Officers and detectives shuffling around, people here and there. Just as things seemed to be calming down for they got a call about a rape of a young girl.
"Liv- why don't you and Rollin's take this. The boys need to catch up on their paper work of the DA will hang us out to dry." Captain said handing Amanda the address on a piece of paper.
They arrived to the crime scene and entered the caution-taped house.
"What have we got here Mel?" Olivia asked, her and Amanda joining Melinda Warner in the bedroom.
"16 year old Jamie Winters, raped and murdered. Her sister found her." Melinda said examining the body.
Amanda took in the crime scene, the young blondes hair now tinted red. The light blue eyes still open. Shivers ran down her spine as pictures of her sister began to fill her head.
Olivia noticed the blonde starring at the body.
"Where's the sister now?" Olivia asked Melinda.
"She's downstairs with a uni." Melinda said.
"Let us know what you find?" Olivia asked as she stood up.
"Sure thing. Plenty of fluids and DNA here. This should be a breeze." Melinda said.
"Hey." Olivia said walking up to Amanda. "Let's go talk to the sister."
Twenty minutes later Amanda entered the interrogation room with a cup of water for the young blonde.
The young girl sipped the water and wiped her tears.
"Jasmine, is there anyone who would want to hurt your sister? Did she have any ex boyfriends or enemies?" Olivia asked.
"No." The girl cried. "Everyone loved Jamie! She was so kind. Why did he do this to her? She didn't deserve this!"
Amanda's heart broke.
"Did anyone have access to the house besides you and your sister?" Olivia asked.
"No. My parents are on a business trip. We begged them to let us stay alone. We kept the door locked." She said, new tears springing from her eyes.
"She was my sister." She said quietly. "I love her."
"I know you do sweetheart that's why it's important you help us. I know it hurts, believe me I know, but it will get better. We will do everything in our power to get justice for Jamie." Olivia said, grabbing the young girls hand.
"How am I supposed to live without her? She was my best friend. I loved her so much. Yeah- sometimes we fought, but I loved her." The girl asked, burying her head in her hands.
Amanda felt something inside her break.
Her throat tightened and her mouth went dry.
She had to get out of this room.
The young girls sobs filled the emptiness of the room and Amanda was fighting to hold back the stinging tears in her eyes.
She loved Kim.
"I want my sister back." The young girl cried.
Amanda dropped her head.
Olivia watched silently out of the corner of her eye as Amanda pushed off the chair and left the room.
She pushed through the squad room and into the bathroom.
The blonde leaned over the bathroom sink sobbing, her shoulders shaking and her chest fighting for air.
Her heart ached. She loved Kim.
She was her sister, no matter what Kim did to her. She was her sister.
The bathroom door quietly opened.
Olivia entered the bathroom silently, not wanting to startle the broken blonde.
Olivia approached Amanda.
"Hey. Shh. It's okay." Olivia said placing an arm around the blonde, comforting her.
Amanda turned into the brunette's embrace and cried.
She cried harder then she ever cried in her life.
She cried harder then she did when her dog died.
She cried harder then she did when Kim pushed her down the stairs and she broke her arm.
She cried harder then she did when her Poppop died.
She cried harder then a person is supposed to cry.
The kind of cry that squeezes your throat and chest and your head pounds and your body shakes.
The kind of cry that makes you want to throw up.
The kind of cry that makes Olivia want to cry- and Olivia Benson never cries.
