Penance
by faelyn leaf
2/14
Chapter Two
"But Mama!" It was a lost argument, but Usagi had to try anyway. After what happened at the ... last senshi meeting, her mother had announced that Usagi would be going to Mugen Academy. There was a letter from the school, and it had come with scholarship money and everything, but it didn't make sense to Usagi. She didn't remember even applying for Mugen!
"I don't want to go!" Usagi cried. It wasn't fair! First the girls left her and now this? She was starting to hate Mugen Academy and she'd only just heard of it!
"Usagi, be reasonable." Ikuko smoothed out her daughter's hair. "Just by going to Mugen, you'll have the chance to pick from any high school you want when the time comes."
"I didn't sign up for any scholarship! I'm not smart enough to go to a fancy academy like that. I don't know why they messed up and picked me, but they should have picked someone else!" Rei and Ami came to Usagi's mind, but she didn't say their names.
"Nonsense! My daughter is anything but stupid. You're smart Usagi, in your own way. Maybe Mugen sees something in you that you don't."
"Like how fast I can eat lunch," she said glumly.
"Usagi!"
"Who's going to study with me for high school exams? My friends won't be there!"
"Usagi," her mother said as kindly as she could, "I know you aren't like your friend Ami, but with your grades right now, high school entrance exams are the least of your worries."
Normally, Usagi would protest and whine and tell her mother that she wasn't Ami, and Ami was a genius so it wasn't fair to compare them anyway. But thinking of Ami made her chest feel hollow and tears well in her eyes, so she didn't say anything. She thought things over for a minute.
"I don't want to live so far away from you and Papa and Shingo."
Ikuko held her daughter close, but it was clear that she been prepared for the discussion. "Sometimes, we all have to do things we don't like, Usagi. It's part of growing up. Besides, Juuban has hardly been safe lately. Your arm just got out of its sling – what if you get attacked again and the Sailor Senshi aren't there to rescue you?"
Usagi started to cry again, but not for any reasons her mother might imagine. The senshi wouldn't be there for her any more, that much was true. They wouldn't be ever again. Usagi worried at her lip.
"What does, what does papa say?"
Ikuko settled herself so she could cradle her daughter. Kenji had been away on business the past few weeks, and hadn't come home yet. He had hated the idea of his perfect, sweet, innocent girl going off to live on her own, but even he couldn't deny both the opportunity and safety going to Mugen would offer. He had been horrified to learn of the monster attack on their daughter when Ikuko had called him, and it had taken every ounce of her patience to explain to her husband exactly why they couldn't lock Usagi up in the house forever.
"He's going to miss you, Usagi, we all are." Usagi opened her mouth to protest, but her mother stopped her. "Yes, even Shingo."
"We just want you to give it a try. And..."
"And?"
Ikuko smiled. "And, if you still hate it by the end of the first term, you can come home."
"Really?" Like magic, the unshed pools of tears evaporated from Usagi's eyes.
Her mother suppressed at laugh, and nodded. "Your father insisted. But. And it's a big 'but', Usa, you have to promise to try your best."
"I will, I will!"
"That's my girl." Ikuko hugged her tightly. "This isn't a punishment, it's a chance. Your father and I want you to understand that."
"Yes, Mama," Usagi said automatically. "I still don't want to go," she said petulantly.
"I know, Usagi."
"What if I don't make any friends?" Usagi asked suddenly, the thought occurring to her for the first time. "What if they all hate me for not being smart enough, or good enough?"
"Usagi, if there's one thing you're good at, it's making friends. You make people happy when they're around you, and that's a rare gift. You'll meet tons of new people and become friends with them all! Remember when we first moved to Juuban and you were scared no one would like you?"
Usagi didn't, but believed her mother. She shook her head emphatically no. "What happened?" she asked encouragingly, hoping her mother would tell the story.
"Well, you were very young." Ikuko smiled at the memory. "You cried all the way to school your first day; I was so worried that you wouldn't fit in! You proved me wrong; there wasn't anything to worry about. When I came to pick you up, you were already friends with half your class, and you told me that Naru would be your best friend forever."
"I guess it wasn't so bad."
"No. And your father and I will only be a phone call away, so will Naru and the girls. You'll have Luna with you, and you'll come visit on Sundays. Maybe we can pick you up Saturday after school, and have Naru stay the night?"
Usagi smiled, and Ikuko instantly felt pleased. "I'd like that."
"I thought you might."
"Um, Mama?" Usagi asked shyly.
"What is it, Usagi-chan?" Usagi was a teenager, so Ikuko was used to her daughter being petulant and sad, but shy was something new. Her daughter was never shy. It worried her.
"You're not sending me away because, because you don't want me here, are you? I'm not, I'm not a burden am I?"
"Of course not, Usagi! Why would you think that?"
Usagi wouldn't meet her worried gaze, instead she seemed to find her shoes fascinating. "No reason, Mama. I'm sorry."
"Usagi, your father and I love you. We want you with us, but we can't deny that Mugen offers you so much. We're trying to think of your future. As much as we love our carefree girl, she's not going to stay a teenager forever."
"I'm sorry Mama," Usagi said softly. "I don't know why I said that."
"It's all right," Ikuko smiled reassuringly. "It's understandable for you to think that. Just remember we always have your best interests in mind."
"Okay, Mama," Usagi said solemnly. "I'll remember."
"Now, why don't you run along and finish your homework?"
"Um, actually, I was wondering if I could go stop by the arcade, to say goodbye to Motoki?"
"All right, Usagi, but just this once. You have to pull your grades up."
"Yes, Mama!"
"And be sure to come home for dinner. We're having curry chicken and, if you eat all your vegetables, there's lemon pie for dessert."
Usagi's smile was brilliant. "Lemon pie?"
xXx
The senshi meetings had fast become subdued, and not even Makoto's home made chocolate cookies seemed to help. Not only did their betrayal hang over the senshi like noose, but without Usagi's sunny presence it was easy to get weighed down by the sheer enormity of their mission. She may not have been the best senshi, but Usagi had a way of keeping things light, and reminding her serious friends to laugh and smile. With Usagi beside them, the defeat of Queen Beryl and the Dark Kingdom felt possible, but now it just felt daunting and insurmountable. Especially since they were missing not only their princess, but their two feline advisers as well.
Makoto watched as Rei made tea while they discussed Artemis's disappearance. They were all worried, but Makoto knew that Minako was the one hurting the most, though she tried not to show it.
"We've already called all the animal shelters within Juuban district, and most of the others in the city." Ami said. "I think the next logical step would be to start calling veterinarian offices, as well as expanding the shelter search to areas surrounding the city. If Artemis was looking for the enemy's youma portal, it's possible his investigation took him out of Tokyo entirely." Ami accepted a cup of tea from Rei's outstretched hand. She sipped on the hot drink, and mulled over her new train of thought.
"Maybe someone picked him up and he hasn't been able to call us yet," Makoto suggested. She couldn't help it, but the entire thing reminded her of the Rhett Butler incident, and she kept picturing poor Artemis being mauled at by some kid.
Minako tried to smile, and Makoto had to give her credit. "He probably got distracted by some cute, barely legal kitten, and went on a bender when she rejected him." The blond grinned as if she expected a rebuke, but sighed when she was met with silence.
"Maybe we should try calling Luna," Ami advised. "We left Usagi her communicator, after all."
"No," said Makoto. That was the very last thing they needed to do. "We took everything away from her, we can't come crawling back to her now. Usagi's strong, but I don't want to keep hurting her." She glanced at Minako. "Even if it is for Artemis."
"It wouldn't help anyway." Rei said thoughtfully. She had finished with the tea, and now sat beside the rest of them at the table."If Artemis told her anything about where he was going, she would have contacted us by now."
"Yeah," Makoto agreed. "Luna keeps on top of things like that. I wonder what she and Usagi are doing?" She really didn't think she would miss her cheery blonde friend, or the staunch royal advisor so much.
No one said anything, and Makoto felt the tension rise in the room. Unless it had to do with the mission, Usagi's name had become taboo.
"I'll keep trying to read the fire," Rei said eventually, "but so far it hasn't told me anything."
"Lost your touch, pyro?" Minako teased.
"You wish!"
"Have we decided on course of action against the Dark Kingdom? " Ami asked more to distract Rei and Minako then to get real progress, and Makoto admired her friend's diplomacy. It wasn't the first time the question had come up, and they still didn't have an answer.
For Makoto, the answer was obvious. "I still say we attack first. Take them by surprise, and they won't have a chance to fight back."
Ami swept her bangs out of her face, and looked lost in thought for a moment. "It's a good idea, but we can't formulate a solid plan until we can find that portal." Ami took out her Mercury computer and typed on it furiously. "Minako, are you sure you can't remember anything more? Anything that would give us a clue on where to start looking?"
"He just said he was going to go calibrate the whatsit. Does that help?"
Rei ground her teeth in frustration. "Were you even listening to him?"
"No, not really," Minako admitted. "Artemis is always telling me that I have a mind like a sleeve."
"Sieve," Ami automatically corrected, and it made Makoto smile. Ami's eyes hadn't even left the computer screen.
Minako toyed with the bow in her hair anxiously. "I just wish he'd come back."
It was a scary thing when even Minako sounded depressed. "We'll find him, don't worry," Makoto tried to reassure her.
Ami put her computer down. "Let's assume we know where the portal is. What would be our plan then?"
The other three senshi looked at each other.
"Destroy her remaining generals," Minako said. Makoto noticed there there was something in her eyes, a hardness that the bubbly blonde usually kept well hidden.
"So Kunzite and Endymion." Rei said bluntly.
"I don't see the problem." Minako said. "This Mamoru guy," she frowned, "I don't like him. He seems to always been near Usagi in battle, or not."
"He wasn't much better even before he was brainwashed," Makoto muttered. She still couldn't forgive the guy for the way he treated her friend. "Okay, destroy the generals, but how do we do that? Without Usagi's wand, it takes us twice the time even to kill regular youma."
"They're youma," Rei fumed. "Dusting them's not supposed to be a walk in the park!"
"It's getting annoying," Makoto said vehemently. "We're supposed to be senshi, but we can't defeat a few youma without getting banged up?"
"It's possible we haven't awoken into our full powers yet," Ami said thoughtfully.
"So how can we?" asked Minako.
"I don't know," Ami said sheepishly. "Normally I'd ask one of the cats –"
"Well we don't have that option right now!" Rei snapped.
"Okay, enough's enough, guys. Fighting with each other isn't going to help," Makoto said.
"No, Rei's right." Ami suddenly looked exhausted, and Makoto couldn't blame her. "We don't have anything new, so lets not waste our energy debating this. It's not going to help."
"If we're done," Minako looked at the others, "I'm going to head home and start calling those animal hospitals."
Rei ran her fingers through her hair agitatedly. "Yeah, okay. Ami's right, we won't solve anything like this. Who's turn is it to take the ginzuishou?"
Since youma were attracted to it, the senshi had decided that each of them would take turns carrying it, to try and confuse the enemy. Ami had theorized that it took youma a while to "lock on" to it's energy, and if the senshi kept it moving, they would have even more trouble. So far it seemed to be working, and there had been less attacks in a week than Usagi had had in three days.
"Mine," said Makoto. It was hard not to admire the shimmering crystal when Rei placed it into her hands, but she still found it hard to believe that such a little thing would be the weapon to destroy or help the Dark Kingdom. Or that it was the source of Usagi's power. "Ami, you still want to keep the broach?"
"The youma don't seem to be able to sense like they can the ginzuishou, so it should be safe with only one keeper."
"Bye everyone!" Minako shouted as she left for the door.
Rei had left for the kitchen to clean the dishes, and it was just Makoto and Ami in the shrine's spare room. Makoto was hungry, and just the thought of cooking relaxed her, but there was one more thing she had to do. "Ami?"
"Yes?"
"Usagi, how's she's doing in her new school?" she asked bluntly.
"I checked her records a few days ago. Even though she's not enrolled in Juuban any more, she's not scheduled to start classes at Mugen for another few days."
"It's just hard transferring to a new school, and I wish we'd picked something other than that snooty Mugen place to send her to." Ami smiled lightly, and that gave Makoto the courage to ask her next question. "Are you glad we did it?"
"We need to do everything in our power to keep Usagi safe. Besides, Usagi's always liked to draw, and Mugen has one of the best fine art programmes in Japan. That's why I chose it. She might even improve in her other studies while she's there."
Makoto grinned. Leave it to Ami to go all out. "I'm glad too. See you tomorrow, Ami."
"Goodnight."
xXx
Usagi sat nervously at the train station beside her mother and brother. She had asked to be driven to her new apartment, but since her father had needed the car for work, she had had to take the train. Alone. Her mother held her hand reassuringly, but Usagi couldn't help the tears that pooled on the edge of her vision, or the way her breath hitched.
"Now, have you forgotten anything?"
Her mother's voice pulled Usagi out of her melancholy thoughts. She shook her head. "No, I don't think so, Mama."
"Luna's carrier is beside you? Good. Your new school uniforms are packed?"
"Wish they weren't," Usagi pouted. "They're ugly. And plaid." Probably designed by a youma, she thought uncharitably to herself. A blind youma.
Ikuko ignored her. "Your school books?
"Yes," Usagi said sullenly.
"I know you have your clothes with you. What about your pocket money for the next week?"
"That too."
"Good. Now, don't forget that money is for food and getting yourself settled. I made a list of things you'll need to buy, so I don't want you to call in a few days complaining you spent it all on arcade machines."
Usagi scowled. "I won't Mama."
"Well, now that's all out of the way, I know something you did forget." Ikuko pulled out a small, pink leather address book out of her purse.
"Oh, Mama, thank you!" she squealed.
Usagi clutched onto the book like a talisman and cradled it protectively against her chest. How had she forgotten her address book? She had memorized her friends' information ages ago, but Motoki had given her his number when she had said goodbye to him at the arcade. He'd made her promise to call if she needed anything, and as soon as she had got home, Usagi had carefully written the number in the book, right underneath Naru's.
"Don't lose it," Ikuko warned. "We don't want that nice young man Motoki calling for a date when your father's home."
Usagi's cheeks burned. "It's not like that, Mama!"
"Of course not, dear."
"He's got a girlfriend!"
"Yeah," Shingo said sagely, "and unless Godzilla's become desperate, who'd want to date her?"
"Shingo!" Usagi screamed, drawing curious looks from the other travellers in the station.
"That's enough you two!" Ikuko said sternly. "No more arguing."
They sat in silence, and Usagi watched the minutes pass by on the station clock. All to soon, her train pulled up in the station, and it was time for her to go.
"Mama?" she asked timidly.
Ikuko squeezed her hand. "Yes, Usagi?"
"I still don't want to go."
"Aw, stop being such a crybaby, Usagi!" Shingo cut in. "You'll have no curfew—"
"Shingo!" Ikuko protested.
"Won't have to eat carrots ... Hey! You could have cake for breakfast if you wanted!"
"Cut it out right this minute, Tsukino Shingo!"
"You think?" asked Usagi.
"Uh huh. I'll be great, you'll see. Wish I could go."
Usagi grinned and ruffled his hair. Strange that Shingo would be the one to make her feel better. "You're not so bad for an obnoxious brat."
Shingo flushed, and smoothed down his messed hair to cover his embarrassment. "I guess I could do worse for a sister," he grumbled.
Usagi beamed at him and boarded her train.
xXx
Three hours later, Usagi found herself in an unfamiliar part of the city, completely lost. The directions her mother gave her confused Usagi, and she desperately wanted to be somewhere, anywhere but where she was. And worse of all, even though she had let Luna out of the carrier, the cat couldn't help her for fear of being overheard in the crowd! Stupid Mugen Academy, she thought viciously. Stupid Mama for making her go. Stupid life.
Usagi finally gave into her anguish and collapsed on a nearby bench. The urge to cry overwhelmed her, and she wailed pitifully. Nothing seemed to be going right for her. First the senshi didn't want her any more, and then going this new school, and now she couldn't even find the stupid apartment complex! Usagi buried her face in her hands and, ignoring the strange looks from passersby, started to sob.
What was she going to do?
"Usagi," Luna's voice in her ear startled her out of her thoughts. "Usagi!" Luna whispered again. That cat's hiss tickled her neck, and Usagi couldn't help but giggle. "Oh for heaven's sake, Usagi. Stop crying and ask for directions!"
Directions? Usagi looked down at her mother's hand drawn map, marked with squiggles and squares and felt like an idiot. Why hadn't she thought of that herself? "Oops, sorry Luna," she said sheepishly. "Guess I wasn't thinking."
"That's nothing new," Luna muttered crossly.
"Now, who should I ask?" Luna rolled her eyes, but Usagi didn't see it. She looked around, and stopped when she spotted girl with green hair wearing a school uniform. A very familiar, very ugly, very plaid school uniform. Bingo. Usagi's heart felt lighter already. She smiled happily and wiped the stray tears from her eyes.
"Hi!" she said with a bow when the girl came closer. "I'm Tsukino Usagi!"
If the girl was taken aback with Usagi's forwardness, she didn't show it. "Hello, Tsukino-san, I'm Kaioh Michiru. Is there anything I can help you with?" The girl – Michiru-san – raised a delicate eyebrow and Usagi suddenly felt childish.
Usagi tried to ignore the heat in her cheeks. "Well, um, it's just..." Usagi stammered.
Michiru brushed a loose lock of green hair behind her ear. "Yes?" she asked patiently.
"It's just I'm, I'm lost, and I saw your uniform, and thought you could help. I'm going to Mugen now, too!"
"You're a new student of the Academy?"
"Um, yeah." Usagi tugged on her shirt nervously. "I don't really look it, though."
Michiru smiled. "Most don't, but I will certainly help a new student. Where do you need to go?"
"Sakura House Apartments. Do you know where that is?"
Michiru laughed and pointed down the street with an elegant gesture. "Yes, it's a common apartment building for students who don't live in the area. It's two blocks down that way and to the left. Had you gone just a little further, you would have seen the sign."
Usagi blinked. She wasn't lost? "Thank you so much, Michiru!"
"You're very welcome, Tsukino-san."
"Oh, no, it's just Usagi!" she chirped happily.
"Usagi, then. I'm afraid I can't take you there myself, I have an appointment to get to. Are you sure you'll be all right alone?"
"Yep! Besides, I've got Luna with me and she never gets lost!" Michiru blinked, but said nothing. Usagi bowed to her again, and with one grateful, but rapid wave, she scooped up Luna and hurried off to find her new home.
She never noticed the curious, teal eyes that followed her until she was out of sight.
