LMFAO at Hogwarts

Chapter Two – Potions Rock Anthem

Theo was bored once again. It had been a week since he had turned his dorm room into a dance club and aside from a few calculating looks from Blaise Zabini no one seemed to suspect him at all. He figured if it worked to cure his boredom once, maybe the spell could alleviate the crushing boredom of sitting through a Potions class with the Gryffindors. Before he could really think out any possible consequences, which wasn't very Slytherin of him, he had his wand out and was whispering the spell. Just like last time music seemed to come from all around them, a different tune however.

Everyone in class began to sing as one.

"Potions rock is in the class tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you explode your cauldron

Everybody just have a good time

Potions rock is in the class tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you explode your cauldron

We just wanna see you-"

"Stir that." Professor Snape stated calmly from the front of the room, before everyone jumped out of their chairs potions forgotten and began dancing, robes flying everywhere. Harry Potter danced his way up front and began to sing while doing a strange shuffling dance.

"In class, Potions rock, lookin' for your witch?

She's on my broom. Nonstop when we in the class,

cauldron bubblin' while she's choppin' plants.

Where the butterbeer? I gots to know,

tight jeans, lightning bolt cause I'm rock 'n' roll

Pure blood, Half blood, domino, got the money, mom's a doe."

Dancing his way up the aisle Draco Malfoy was nearly purple, his hair flying everywhere- Theo could hear him thinking 'wait till I tell my father about this'. He started laughing harder as he watched Potter's Muggleborn take over the song

"Running through these wizards like Accio

I got that Muggleborn flow, Rock 'n' roll no halo

We Potions rock, yeah that's the crew that I'm reppin

Flyin to the top no lead in our zeppelin"

Granger was actually smiling, and seemed to be the only one who could perform this bouncy, Muggle dance well. Maybe she had done this before. And once again everyone joined in to sing. Most every one was huffing or holding on to tables, it seems Wizards weren't the fittest of people. Seamus Finnegan accidently knocked over his cauldron burning his eyebrows off in the process, but kept dancing.

"Potions rock is in the class tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you explode your cauldron

Everybody just have a good time

Potions rock is in the class tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you explode your cauldron

We just wanna see you-"

"Stir that," Professor Snape added again, not even looking up from his notes.

"Everyday I'm shufflin', shufflin',shufflin'," the boy-who-lived-to-dance-badly, sang out. Neville Longbottom wheezing and sweating jumped up on a stool and began to belt out.

"Step up fast and be the first witch to make me throw these galleons.

We gettin' money, don't be mad, now stop, hatin' is bad."

Then Draco nearly purple with rage climbed on a table, Theo laughed as Longbottom fell like a lump off the stool. Draco's dancing shook the table causing cauldrons to fly, and people to slip all over the place, Theo hid under his table while Draco started his verse.

"One more brew for us, another round

Please fill up my cup, don't mess around.

We just wanna see you shake it now

Now you wanna be, you're naked now."

Then Granger, who was laughing at Weasley's horrible dancing started one more time.

"Stir it up, chop it down, put your wands up to the sound.

Stir it up, chop it down, put your wands up to the sound.

Stir it up, chop it down, put your wands up to the sound,

put your wands up to the sound,

put your wands up to the sound"

After that everyone joined in, Theo even good naturedly hummed a bit from under the table.

"Stir it up, chop it down, stir it up, chop it down

Stir it up, chop it down, stir it up, chop it down

Get up, put your wands up to the sound,

put your wands up, put your wands up,

put your wands up, put your wands up"

It continued like that for a few more minutes, Theo had to admit Crabbe and Goyle had really gotten into the spirit, they were holding Weasley up on their shoulders, and still dancing, their voices really added depth to the whole affair. Blaise was glaring at him while sedately shuffling in the aisle. As the song was about to end Professor Snape once more spoke up.

"Stir that, everyday I'm Potionin'."

With those last words everyone slumped down, some into their chairs, most fell to the floor exhausted, covered in potions, Finnegan, hesitantly touching his eyebrows.

"Fifty points from Gryffindor for disrupting class."

Omake by KrazyAngelKat

Neville was sitting next to Hermione in Greenhouse Three working on an extra credit assignment when he dropped his trowel for the third time. Hermione looked at him wondering why he was clumsy like he was in Potions not acting like the Herbological genius that he normally was. She was planning on ignoring it until he got bitten by a Gnawing Geranium, a plant she had seen him handle perfectly hundreds of times before.

"Neville, what is wrong with you? You are spacing out and if you don't get it together WE WILL FAIL." The Bushy headed-bossy-know-it-all huffed in frustration while he bandaged his fingers

"Sorry, I just can't focus today," he mumbled, "I keep thinking about… um, Potions," he stammered, a fierce blush rising on his cheeks.

"Oh, well don't worry about that, if you simply follow the study regiment I drafted for you then you should be just fine." She told him, ignoring the glaring fact that he couldn't brew even the simplest potions to save his life.

"I, um, wasn't thinking about my grade…"he trailed off as he caught sight of her horrified expression. It clearly said 'how can anyone not be always thinking about their grades'. He then rushed through trying to avert a Hermione Granger patented lecture #4 entitled 'Grades and Why They Will Control the Rest of Your Life'.

"No I was thinking of the class we all ended up dancing," he explained.

"Oh yes that was an interesting effect, I wonder if it was caused by the fumes from one of the potions or by a spell?" She proceeded to go on at length about possible spells, outside forces and the effects of fumes from incorrect potions.

Neville sighed to himself, she may have been the best dancer he had ever seen and smoking hot when she was at it but all this noise just wasn't worth it. He pulled on a set of earmuffs while he turned to work on the next tray of plants, maybe he'd just admire her from afar- specifically the out of hearing range kind of afar.

"Do you think you could remember exactly what was in your cauldron Neville?" Fifteen minutes later when she finally turned back to him, she found him humming "Potions Rock" while wearing the fuzzy pink earmuffs even though she was sure they weren't planning on working with Mandrakes.