Disclaimer: I don't own Hinata nor Naruto. They own each other. Bwahahahaha!!
Author's Note: Yay! This is the alternative ending of chapter one, as promised.
Unbeta-ed as always. Constructive criticisms for the poor authoress will be greatly appreciated. Happy birthday to me! Haha. Winks.
HINATA'S POV
I'm aching to run away from here. I had to… I badly wanted to…Somebody take me away from here…
Damn it… My knees felt weak and no matter how I want to run, I just cant. I just don't have the strength.
The guild activities were over five hours ago and still I'm right here. I can't move… If I'd move even a single bit I'm afraid I would just break down and cry.
Damn it… Of all people… I just had to be the one to hear it from him. Why do I have to be here in the first place? I should have gone home and not attend the club activities today...I should have gone home…
Is it too much of a fault that I badly wanted to see him?!
'Hinata? She's just a friend. Come on, that's stupid!'
I couldn't believe it…
'She's just a friend…'
I just had to hear it…
'She's just a friend…'
His words keep ringing back my head.
'Just a friend…'
I cursed as I slowly got up towards my locker to change my shoes. I have to get away from here…Please…
'That's stupid!'
I didn't imagine that such few words would be enough to hurt me like this. After all, what was so wrong by voicing out his opinion that falling in love with me is plain stupid? Or rather… that's my interpretation of what I've heard.
Kami… I didn't know it would hurt this bad… If I had known… If I had known I would probably try so hard to stop it…
Damn it, I tried hard to stop it! But it seemed like it's never enough… I couldn't…Why did it have to be him? Why do I have to fall for Naruto-kun? That Naruto who clearly made me feel stupid by falling in love with a friend? That Naruto whom I never stand a chance…That Naruto who can't possibly return my feelings…?
I hate to admit it… I hate to say that I am hurt because I… Hyuuga Hinata has already fallen in love with him…
Perhaps I'm stupid enough… Perhaps If he knows what I feel right now, he would probably laugh at my face…Perhaps, I'm not the intelligent, strong and confident girl they thought I am today… because right now…
Right now… I feel that I'm useless… that I'm so stupid… that I'm so weak…
Damn it…
Even the heaven seemed to be against me. It's so dark outside and the hard wind blows my hair against my face.
I stopped walking when I felt a cold droplet touched my cheek.
'Rain…?'
I looked up on the dark sky as the droplets of water started to grow heavier. I felt my uniform got soaked and the coldness of the rain grew onto me.
'Cold…'
Just like the cold hands that squished my heart until it was gone into pieces…
I smiled bitterly. Perhaps, the heaven's was not that cruel to me…
"More please…" I whispered. Just like a tramp begging for some mercy. And as if hearing my words, the rain falls heavier.
'Please… More… '
My sight was blurry… It seems like I'm being covered so that I won't be able to see the cruelness of the world.
Perhaps…Perhaps, I could cry here…
Perhaps, I could be weak here and no one will see my pain. It's not like I'm hoping that he would come and save me, right…? I have no hopes that would happen right?
A tear fell. Then followed by another and another. It made quite a contrast against the cold rain.
I tried to stop and yet I can't. I wanted to shout. Yell out load until I couldn't hear my voice. But I couldn't speak…
'More please… More…'
I wanted to embrace the coldness… I wanted to turn numb… I want the coldness of the rain beat the coldness I feel in my heart…
'Please…'
The pain wouldn't disappear. Like a broken piece of glass stabbing my heart over and over.
And in the darkness of the sky… Under the heavy rain that covers my sight…I hide the warm tears falling through my eyes…
'Please…'
--
NARUTO'S POV
'So, do you like Hinata?'
I had to stop and think back then. No, Hinata is just a friend. Nothing more and nothing less.
'Are you sure? Think about it Naruto.'
I don't have to think about it. I don't want to.
I don't want to commit the same mistake of falling in love with a friend and having my heart broken.
No… I don't want to…
I sighed begrudgingly when her image suddenly appeared on the white ceiling. And then I felt it.
That familiar pang in my heart…
'No…'
I shifted position and closed my eyes. I don't want to think about her but like some sort of magic, she kept on appearing in my mind.
Another pang. I fought the urge to clutch my chest.
'No…'
Damn it… Why do I feel like I've said something wrong…? Ah… I guess, I just have to chill out.
I jumped out of the bed and decided to buy something. Anything…
Anything that will make her gone out of my mind.
I opened the door and cursed…
It's raining outside…
And I hate the rain… So much…
I took my umbrella and slowly find my way to the nearest department store. I watched as the rain got heavier that I almost couldn't see. I should have worn my glasses…
It feels cold…
'Neh, neh Naruto! Do you like the rain…?'
Cursed it… why do those memories keep coming back?
'It seems like it cleanses the world, isn't it?'
Cleanses the world huh…? And yet it gave me all the dirty feelings… Anxiety… Hatred… Jealousy…Pain…
'We're best of friends' right?'
I smiled bitterly. I was a fool back then. I was blinded by love and I destroyed something precious.
'So do you like Hinata?'
No…I won't ever…
'Are you sure?'
I clenched my fist. I want to cursed and punched Shikamaru's guts for doing this to me,
'You're not being stupid again are you..?' a voice inside me spoke.
"Shut up…"
It's not like I wanted to think about her every minute, damn it! It's not even my fault that my eyes keep on seeing her even though she's not there.
Just like now… Damn it…I'm seeing her standing on the cold wet street.
Get out of my mind Hinata…
I walked forward expecting that Hinata will disappear anytime sooner. She did not.
I felt it again. That pang in my heart. The uprising beat of my pulse.
"Hinata…?" I whispered. And then…
Time stopped.
She looked at me with those sad puffy eyes.
She's crying…
'No…'
No…
It felt like someone broke my heart…
'No…'
I wanted to run… But my feet won't move.
'Move feet! Move! Damn it!'
"You came…?" a whisper from her. And then, as if on cue, she ran away from me.
'No…'
I dropped on my knees as I felt another great pang. With wide eyes, I clutched my chest. Her crying face stuck on my mind.
It hurts…It hurts…
Kami…Take it away from me please… This pain…
Tears fell in my eyes along with the cold rain. I wished it could wash away my pain…
The realization hit me hard….
I was a liar…A coward…The past blinded me to restrain myself in finding happiness.
I was afraid…of getting hurt again…Of destroying something wonderful again…
But then again… I still got hurt...
Can't I do things without great assurance of the future? That I won't get hurt? That I won't fall in love?
I was the one who had gone stupid all along… How could I not notice that…?
I want to protect her smiling face…Was it so bad now?
This pain I have in my chest… I couldn't push it any longer…
Oh, Kami…I love that girl…
'I love you…'
(Start of Alternative ending)
--
HINATA'S POV
I couldn't hear anything… other than the splash of water against my feet. It seems like I'm running forever. Seems like I'm lost and I don't know where to go.
I couldn't forget his face back then… His handsome face, the contours of his nose, his eyes, his lips… I couldn't forget the hope that suddenly lifted me back into a dream.
I'm… such… a fool…
How could I think that he came for me like the idiot that I was? That he came to save me, to heal my broken heart…?
Realizing the reality that was slapped hard into my face, I ran… I had to…
Because it breaks my heart to see him…It breaks my heart to hope for something that wouldn't be given to me at all…
'Damn it! Why do I have to hope?! Why…on earth… does hope exists at all…? I don't want to hope… No… Not anymore…'
My knees felt wobbly and it's getting darker.
'Somebody…take me…away from here…' I thought as my knees gave up on me, so as my strength.
I'm probably such a pathetic sight…Damn…Why did my knees give up on me but the pain still remains?!
"Why…?" I shouted but only a murmur was heard.
As the rain covers my sight, I felt my body crouches heavily. The sound of rain slowly disappearing in my ears…
And then… I saw his illusion… Running at me with an umbrella at hand…
I'm pathetic…I know he can't love me… so why was it, that even my sight and my mind betrayed me?
"Why…? Naruto-kun…" I asked before I was swallowed by darkness.
--
I woke up to see an unfamiliar room colored with blue. No, this is definitely not my room. I glanced outside the window and noticed that it is raining hard. Looking around, I saw a Ragnarok poster on the wall facing the bed with a basket ball laid carelessly in a corner. There's also a study table with a laptop open and a background too familiar to me…
'Wasn't that mine and Naruto's Ragnarok characters when they got married?' I thought quizzically.
Beside the laptop, laid a digital alarm clock that said it's already 4:00 am. I shifted, suddenly feeling a rapid rush of pain coursed through my head. I discerned that it was unbelievably cold and I began to cough with difficulty.
"A-are you alright?" a familiar voice asked. I almost jumped in shock to see Naruto sitting on the floor beside the bed. He looked like he just woke up as he rubbed his eyes groggily.
I froze.
He looked ethereal through my own eyes. Just like an angel of some sort, less the wings, altogether with the sadness and the blush and a look in his eyes I couldn't understand.
'Is he…by any chance…?'
"I saw you yesterday. You passed out under the rain. Why were you running away? Who were you running away from?"
I didn't talk or rather I just couldn't talk. I just stared at him like he's an illusion…a hallucination…yet I can't help but notice how he's so vivid in my eyes. Aren't mirages supposed to be vague?
'It was you I'm running away from! I was running away from the hurt, from the pain! From the feelings that you make me feel…How could you… even… asked that on me…?' I shouted but nothing came. My lips are locked but my eyes spoke of what I feel because suddenly I felt the stinging of my eyes, the lump on my throat, the powerful squeeze in my heart…
I remained silent.
But he, on the other hand, just… out of the sudden…
"You are such an idiot you know! Why were you even standing in the rain like that?! Had you have no umbrella? Really, you are so killing me in worry! Tell me, did someone hurt you?! I'll kill him whoever he is!! Urgh! "He snapped out, shaking my shoulders in a firm grasp.
I looked away. The pain in my heart seemed like it was touched by a healing hand, just because of the concern and worry written lucidly on his face.
"Why…do you care…?" I asked in a murmur. He stopped rambling on and on.
I decided to be bold for a moment. If the answer is his rejection, I could always say that I'm just joking, ain't I?
With a shaking nervous smile in my lips, "Do you…by any chance…like me?"
It was his turn to freeze. A shock expression was written in his face but the silence lingered on.
Ah…rejection… It hurts more when it was slapped against your face the second time…in the front of the one you love.
The tension was so thick it could be cut by a knife. I decided to break the silence, and with a feigned laugh said, "Gotcha! I got you there didn't I?"
The shock never left his face. I had decided to go…or I would break down… I would never like him to see my weakness nor take away the little pride I have. I would never allow that anymore.
Suppressing the urge to cry, I uttered in a wobbly voice, "Uhm… ahm… I-I think I'm disturbing you for quite some time now eh? T-thank you for your help. I don't want to be such a b-burden to you anymore so I gotta be going now. THANK YOU!"
Darn…that sounded like it was forced out of my mouth even in my own ears.
I spun around and headed to the door. I was about to open the door knob when I felt strong arms snaked around my waist, imprisoning me.
In that instant, all I could think of is the warmth of Naruto-kun against my back. The manly scent residing on my nose, the small kisses he was planting against my hair, and how that particular moment felt so right…
"Yes… "He murmured softly but enough for me to hear.
"Huh…?"Was all I could reply as I felt more bewildered every passing second.
"Yes…" he repeated as he burrowed his head against the soft flesh of my neck.
"Just what the hell—"I spun around irritably just to be cut off by the warmth of his lips crashing into mine.
The sound of the rain has stopped, the tick of the clock seemed silent and the time seemed to impede all my thoughts for the moment. I would have never guessed how my eyes went from bulging open to close. I would have never guessed how his left hand went to clutch my head for a deeper kiss and his other hand pulling me closer into him either. Nor would I deduced how on earth my arms suddenly found itself clinging to his neck, asking for more, begging him not to stop.
I would have never speculated such impossible things…But it happened…
The next thing I knew the warmth on my lips was gone.
With closed eyes, I just knew that everything couldn't be true. That I was just dreaming and the dream has come to an end.
I couldn't help the tears that started to fall nor the shaking of my whole body in utter hurt and disappointment.
"H-Hinata… Look at me…" his begging voice rang against my ears.
But I know that he wasn't there…I dare not to go through just another disappointment. I couldn't possibly take any more… I'm so full of it… So tired… And never in my whole life...
did I feel so weak…
"Y-you asked me a while ago, if I like you…Yes…I like you so much… Would you choose to hate me forever…just because… I have fallen in love with you?"
I opened my eyes in shock. I'm positive I never did take any drugs, so why…?
Why was it that this illusion seemed so real?
"L-liar… Why won't you just go away! Why do you keep bugging my mind?! You're just an illusion! You're just a dream! The real Naruto-kun won't love me in any way!! He won't love me…no matter what I do…"
The look in his eyes transformed from hurt to amusement to plain and pure happiness. But no matter how, the feeling of love and tenderness never left his gaze.
"Silly girl. So you mean, you love Naruto-kun?" he started to talk as if he's really an illusion.
"Yes…I love him so much… that I'm seeing him now even if he's not here…" I sighed. I sound like crazy.
"Uhuh…" he reverberates as if he's trying to stop his coming laughter. "But I'm real."
He grabbed my hand and placed it on his cheeks. "Come on. Pinch me, slap me. Do whatever you like."
I obeyed and slapped him with all the force I could muster. Expecting him to be gone sooner, I grimaced.
But he never did. Not believing the truth, I pinched my cheeks.
Right, that hurt. I'm not dreaming and the Naruto-kun that I slapped who, by the way, flew into a corner because of the impact, is damned way… real…
"It c-can't be…But I'm certain I heard you saying that you don't like me… That that is stupid… I heard you…"
He stood up, walking closer to me once more.
"Are you simply playing on me? Are you simply fooling around my feelings? Do you really want to see me this hurt?!"
"No…I never want to see you hurt… Please…Don't cry…I j-just plainly foolishly honestly…love you…" he whispered, hugging my petite frame yet again.
I sobbed. I couldn't control it. The pain that was washed way, the overflowing relief and happiness, that heavy burden that was suddenly gone…
Everything seems too good to be true…
The tears kept on coming, but the pain was gone. Instead, I am smiling with all that I could give.
"I love you…" I whispered before I collapsed into his arms and gave him an extensive passionate kiss.
And yes, the rain has stopped…
Completely…
And is never coming back…
-OWARI-
A/N JUST ONCE MORE: Yatta! Finished the alternative ending! I like this so far. Not bad, after spending two years on hiatus. Oi, caga, tell me what you think ok?
