Disclaimer I DON'T ANYTHING


Derek takes a sip of his coffee, looking the time on the kitchen clock. It's 18:30, but she hasn't come yet. That's more than an hour late.

He torments himself with masochist theories. Maybe she cleared her mind. Maybe at that very moment, she is making love to her boyfriend. His temples throb because he doesn't want to think about that possibility.

Derek is aware that he'd never get involved in such situations, because always someone gets hurt. And he had all the winning cards. Why would she choose a tormented man like him? Some day, Penelope would realize she was losing her time. Then, like every other, she'd end up married to a respectable man.

It's ironic that he always thought about himself as a great player. But his reality was very different. It was women who allowed themselves to be seduced by him, they knew he was lover material. Wild sex without commitment. That was Derek Morgan for all women. Maybe that was Derek to Penelope's mind. Her lover and nothing else.

Of course he wasn't happy with the whole situation. He wanted to be her man and have her all for himself. Derek didn't want to share her body and her love with the damn Kevin Lynch. But then he was nobody. Just a guy who fucked her occasionally. Just a guy who was by her side when she argued with her boyfriend, a guy who would give his life for her. But that doesn't matter. Because Penelope took her decision five years back.

Derek kicks a dining room chair in complete frustration. He begins to despair, sinking in his own misery again. That is his routine from the day he decided that Penelope would be in his bed, without thinking of the consequences. At that moment, he cared very little that she was a taken woman that belonged to another man.

He just wanted to feel her bare skin against his body, his fingers walking all her curves and her lustful mouth kissing every bit of him. She surrendered to him as a divine offering, with total abandon and he took everything she had to offer. And Derek wouldn't change that for anything. Despite all his pain.

A sound at the door is like heavenly music for him. Derek practically holds his breath while he turning the knob. His lungs release the air and his hungry eyes look at her body up and down. That damn white dress clings to her body like a glove. Her breasts are imprisoned under the soft cloth, leaving pretty little to his imagination. With something similar to a growl, Derek chained his arm around her waist to crash her body against him. "I've missed you so much"

He devours her lips with abandon, dying to get into her mouth. She seems to surrenders to his passion by opening her lips, eager to feel his tongue.

Derek pushes their bodies against the door, placing his hands on her hips. His mouth falls down her throat, leaving wet kisses against her skin.

"Derek... stop, please"

"I want you so badly, baby. Need you"

Penelope felt his hands grabbing her butt and she opens her legs like an unconscious gesture. Derek placed himself between her thighs, rubbing up his sex against her wet throbbing center. His thrusts cause moans of pure pleasure that just makes him feel more aroused.

With his face lost in her cleavage, Derek manages forget everything else. He has no doubts with her body trembling against his. He isn't jealous, with her breath brushing his skin and her hands wandering over her body. In those moments of pleasure, she is his. They just are Derek and Penelope, two friends, two people who love each other, two souls destined to be together.

He closed his mouth around her swollen nipple over the fabric of her dress, but she placed her hands on his shoulders. "Derek ...listen to me "

"We'll talk later, ok?"

Penelope grabs his face with both her hands, pulling his mouth from her chest. "We need to talk" she whispers, with watery eyes.

Then he knows that there is nothing good for his heart behind that moistened look. Derek moves away from her, his heart beating madly in his chest "What do you talk about?"

She runs her hand through her hair, breathing normally again. "I asked for a transfer. I'll leave Virginia tomorrow"

Derek feels dying from the first moment the words left her mouth. He shakes his head slowly, placing his hands on his waist,"Where are you going?"

"Away from here"

"Why?"

She looks at him with some guilt, biting her lower lip.

"This isn't right, Derek. I can't keep living this life. You don't deserve this, Kevin don't deserve this "

Derek snorts with some sarcasm "So all this crap is about Kevin's feelings"

"This is necessary. Please, don't make it harder"

He sees her tears fall down her cheeks, and then he dried its wet trail with his knuckles. Derek can't help it. She's his friend, his lover, the love of his life. Not for anything he wants to see her tears.

Derek feels helplessness, anger and disappointment. Because he is sure they both can be happy together. But Penelope is robbing them that possibility, she is taking away their happiness.

"You're a coward," he whispers, looking straight into her eyes, "You're such a coward"

She closes her eyes for a moment, freeing more tears "This is the hardest decision of my life. I just want you to be able to move on without me "

Derek frowns totally shocked. He feels the desperation in his veins. Without thinking too much, he surrounds her waist with his arms again, placing her mouth brushing hers.

"How can you say that?" He whispered, resting his forehead on hers "How can I move on, when I'm still in love with you? How can I be happy, when no one is like you to me?"

Penelope can't help but brushing his lips for the last time, "I have to go, Derek"

"No, don't go"

"Please"

"I can make you happy. I can give you all that you dream" he starts kissing her lips softly, his voice whispering "I can be your husband and the father of your children. Just say the word "

Derek can see the hope in her eyes for a few seconds, "You'll get tired of me, Derek"

"That didn't happen never. I'd love you my whole life, baby girl "

"You'll meet another woman or maybe you'll find a better job. I'll just be an annoying rock in your path. You deserve more than that, honey" she says with conviction, as she strokes his cheek with a trembling hand "You deserve all the best"

He places his hand over hers, turning his face to kiss her palm "But I just want you"

"Goodbye, my love"

Derek felt her lips caress his chin, his jaw... and he knows that this is the last time. "Don't leave me" he whispered weakly.

Penelope sighs deeper and her breath hits his mouth. She gives him one last hug, but Derek released himself from her arms.

She can't bear to look at his full tears eyes anymore, and closes her eyes.

"If you're gonna go, then go away right now"

"Derek, don't hate me please"

He opens the door of his house, "You don't want me to love you, but don't want me to hate you. What the fuck you want from me?" he yells in exasperation.

She smiles bitterly, standing in front of him, "This is my Derek. You'll never lose your temper "

"I'm glad" he mutters with feigned indifference "Wish you well"

Derek closes the door with excessive force, while the truth slams his mind. He doesn't want her to do well. He wants Penelope fails and then she returns sorry into his arms. But his heart knows the real truth. He wants this woman to live a very happy life. Because that's what love is all about. That is to love unconditionally.

As tears go down his face, he thinks of all the songs, movies and books that tell the wonders of love. All of that is bullshit. Derek has loved with all his heart and his soul is broken now. Because his love was not enough for her...

It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone. (Anonymous)

AN I'll write a sequel, I promise