A/N: I'm trying to do some updates before I travel for two weeks and am away from a computer for that time. Hope y'all enjoy.
Of course Pearl had known all along that they weren't likely to see the return of a great many of their friends and comrades. She had scarcely made it back herself. She tried not to think of the shattered gem pieces she'd seen as she sprinted by desperately trying to avoid the white light. She knew that it hadn't been only the Crystal Gems that had suffered. A great many Home World gems had been caught in the cross hairs. She didn't begrudge them because it was so much easier to fall into line then risk being shattered for being different. Even if she was frustrated with their compliance did not mean she wanted to see the glimmering, glittering remains of these gems ground into the dirt like they meant nothing at all.
To the Diamond Authority though, they did mean nothing. They all did. Whatever served to glorify and strengthen their power was what reigned supreme. Hot anger panged through her light form, even as she remembered her own past and the past of Rose Quartz. Their secret that she was forever bound to. She sighed and turned away from the fire. Garnet had disappeared into the cave to her left. She assumed it was to unfuse and process everything the two gems had witnessed. Pearl couldn't say that she blamed them. She wished Rose was here now so she too could do the same but her leader was nowhere to be found.
She couldn't help but wonder if she felt the same guilt and shame about the lost lives of all the gems. They both knew that this strike was a direct retaliation to the supposed shattering of Pink Diamond. It made her face hot and her eyes burn. This was all her fault. Tears stung her cool cheeks as they spilled out then dripped off her chin. From there they either soaked into her tunic or created a puddle in the dirt below her. As much as she had hated her life as a servant she wondered if it was worth giving it all up at the cost of her kinfolk.
She trembled and curled in on herself, clasping her knees to her thin chest. A warm hand on her shoulder caused her to jump and reach for a sword. Garnet looked back at her apologetically. "I didn't mean to frighten you," she murmured.
"You've gotten so quiet these days. Though, I suppose I was distracted." She tried to hastily brush away her tears but Garnet stepped forward again and took her hand.
"It's OK to be upset, you know. There's been a lot of loss. You're not the only one who feels bad either."
A fresh wave hit and she scooted forward to wrap her arms around the fusion. "I didn't know," she choked out.
"None of us did, not even me."
Pearl looked up at her. "This isn't your fault."
"Nor is it yours."
"I... You..." Her mouth worked furiously but the words wouldn't come out. She couldn't say it despite how much she wanted to.
A twig snapped and the pair whipped around, weapons ready as Rose stepped into the light. "Still no sign of anyone. I guess this is it then. It's the three of us."
Pearl wilted. Their ranks had dwindled to the three of them. How were they ever going to survive on this primitive planet with nothing but the three of them? Not that she didn't love Rose and Garnet dearly but surely at some point they would all tire of one another.
While Rose was very much interested in the humans Pearl and Garnet more or less kept their distance from them.
She remembered the bubbled gem she had tucked away in her own and wondered if anything could be done to fix her. Maybe it would be a little less lonely with four of them.
"We should move from here. We've been at this camp for quite some time and I don't want to get caught by anyone they may be sending back to shatter the rest of us that made it."
The two subordinates nodded in agreement, quickly kicking dirt to extinguish and hide the fire that they had made.
"What are we going to do now, Rose?" Pearl asked in a small voice.
"I don't know just yet but we will figure something out."
She nodded and fell quiet. The maroon gem had fallen into step beside the others without a word. She seemed deeply troubled and lost in thought. They all were.
The trio walked for a long time soundlessly until they came to a warp pad. It was cracked but still usable if need be.
"W-what's happening?"
"We need to start fresh. Get away from this place and start a new life. This place holds too much sorrow for anything good to grow," Rose said.
Garnet nodded and stepped onto the pad beside her leader with Pearl following tentatively behind her. The pad gleamed a bright white and they were whisked away from the war zone. They touched down gently in a thick forest. This one was much different than the one they had just left. The trees were more lush and less touched by the humans on the planet.
What is this place?" The white gem inquired, stepping down and turning her head to look around her. It smelled rich here. Piney and sweet with a hint of salt.
"Isn't it lovely?" hummed the leader.
She lead them onward through the woods, still on alert. She didn't think they'd be followed here but she still wanted to keep a close eye out for a while. Again, their trek was without talk but it didn't feel as dense as before. It was as if they had shed a heavy jacket when they stepped off the warp and into their new home.
Rose finally came to a halt in front of the mouth of a cave that overlooked a grand beach.
"I figured this could give us shelter and a vantage point. Plus it's so pretty look at."
They all swiveled around to watch as the sun began its slow climb into the sky turning it a brilliant pinky orange. Even the most skeptical among them had to agree it was pretty magical. They sat down in the sand, shoulder to shoulder and watched as the sun fully rose and warmed their skin.
Meanwhile inside Pearl's gem there was a bubbled Lapis Lazuli. She knew that she was hurt, she could feel the pulsing throb of it. She couldn't reform. Not that she really wanted to at this point. The fear of being found or shattered or seeing what had happened when the great big white light had consumed everything around it. Perhaps that was why she was in so much agony. Or maybe this was what it felt like to be shattered. An eternity of pure pain and inescapable replaying of ones mistakes and fears.
In her central system the same images played over and over again. All the times she had stepped out of line. All the times she had failed her diamond. All the times she had been a disobedient gem. She knew in her heart of hearts that the punishment she was receiving was her own fault. If only she had been a better gem.
