Author's Note: Thank you everyone for reading (or re-reading) this story. This story is my favourite I've ever written and I hope everyone enjoys. I'm interested always in hearing feedback. It helps me shape my stories.
Sirius woke to the muffled sounds of crying coming from the next room. He blinked slowly, the sun drifting in from the open window momentarily blinding him. He had fallen asleep on the incredibly over-ornamented divan he had taken from Black Manor and his neck had a terrible cramp.
"Coming!" Sirius called out, his voice hoarse with sleep.
Harry was screaming at the top of his lungs, waving his small hands and kicking his feet.
This had been their ritual for the past couple days. At the crack of dawn, Harry would cry from the bedroom and wake Sirius up who would then stumble off towards the sound. When Sirius had broken Harry's bassinet while building it several nights ago, he had reconciled himself to the fact that he couldn't afford another and that they would have to sleep in the same bed. For the first night or so, Sirius and Harry had shared the bed, but after receiving a mouthful of baby feet one time too many, he had set up camp in the sitting room.
Sirius scooped Harry up into his arms and bounced him up and down.
"There's a good boy." Sirius cooed, rubbing Harry's back.
Harry calmed down and then buried his face into Sirius' neck, leaving a gooey trail of bogies behind.
"Gross." Sirius grumbled, carrying Harry out into the sitting room. He set Harry down on the floor and began rummaging through the fridge. They had eaten at the bakery below for almost every meal since they had arrived and, while he loved pastries, he was starting to dream of vegetables.
"How about the grocery store?" Sirius asked Harry, crouching down and handing the baby part of a croissant left over from yesterday.
Harry didn't reply. Sirius wasn't surprised.
The sun was shining down for the first time since they had arrived and he felt the strong desire to go outside. If there was one thing he learned from Azkaban it was how to long for sunlight. After Harry had finished eating, he wrapped him up in the same hat and jumper from Mrs. Weasley and stuck him in the pram. Just as he had before, Harry laughed hysterically as Sirius slowly bumped the pram down the stairs, trying desperately not to lose control of it.
They passed by the bakery and Sirius stopped to look in the window. He could see several people inside as well as a stack of freshly-baked lemon tarts. When he saw Ainsley walk around from behind the counter, Sirius ducked out of sight and pushed the pram away down the street.
This was the first time he had made an attempt to leave the confines of their street. From what Ainsley had told him, this neighbourhood, Portobello, used to be a resort but was appropriated into Edinburgh sometime within the last century or so. The sea was quite close to their flat and Sirius imagined Harry would quite like splashing in the ocean when it warmed up in the summer; November in this part of Edinburgh had seemed, so far, very wet and very cold.
They meandered their way down the street and Sirius made it a mission to point out everything they passed to Harry. From dogs walking along next to them to seagulls, Sirius named them and sounded them out slowly in a way he assumed it would be easier for a one year-old to understand. To Harry's great delight, a team of ducks waddled across their path right before they turned into the green grocer's.
The grocer's was a new experience for Harry full of bright, extraordinary colours and shapes. Sirius had barely made it five feet into the store before Harry had lunged to grab a particularly delicious-looking grapefruit from a pile near the door. They were stopped once in the tinned food aisle by a very large woman with an almost incomprehensible accent who insisted on giving Harry a bright pink lolly. Sirius thanked the lady grudgingly, silently resolving himself to the fact that he would be scrubbing pink lolly out of Harry's hair later that night.
Sirius balanced various fruits and vegetables in the basket on his arm and took his time checking for ripeness and quality. He barely knew how to make grilled cheese and he found himself quite grateful for the fact that Harry was too young to realize his cooking would not be entirely up to par in the taste department. If the past couple days had been any indication, Harry would eat anything placed in front of him.
The walk through the grocery store finally ended when Sirius couldn't put anything more into his basket. As he walked towards the checkout counter, he realized that the small amount of muggle money Dumbledore had given him was even more confusing than he had originally thought.
As he approached the cash register, Sirius found himself worrying about being able to get out without embarrassing himself. When the time finally came for the cashier to ring his food through, Sirius was a worried mess.
"Twenty pound thirty." the cashier said, smiling as she leaned over to look in the pram at Harry.
Sirius' hands were shaking slightly as he pulled the paper bills from the wallet in his back pocket.
"Um..." Sirius said quietly, painfully aware of the queue forming behind him.
"Not from around here are you?" the cashier asked, smacking her chewing gum loudly.
"Um, no." Sirius chuckled, placing a paper bill with a ten on it on the conveyor belt.
"One more of those, luv." the cashier said, leaning forward and tapping another one of the bills in Sirius' hand with her finger.
Sirius nodded and rested the note down.
"Thirty, you said?" Sirius pulled out a note with a 20 on it.
"Coins, luv." the cashier said patiently, opening her hand.
Sirius handed over the coins and she counted them out for him.
"There you go." the cashier smiled, handing back the change. "You want plastic?"
"Um, no, I brought my own." Sirius said, reaching into the basket under the pram and pulling out three canvas bags with 'Portobello Bakers' printed on them in broad gold letters.
The cashier filled them and handed them back to Sirius. "See you again, luv. Next!"
Sirius rushed out of the grocery store with the bags swinging from the handles of the pram.
"That was fun, wasn't it, Harry?" Sirius sighed, letting out a deep breath.
I have to get this anxiety under control, Sirius thought, his hands shaking as he pushed Harry back down the road towards the flat.
When Sirius had finally put the last head of lettuce into the crisper, he turned around to the sound of tapping coming from the window. Harry had fallen asleep in the pram and he had left him in the front hall for his nap. He was worried the sound might wake him up, but the boy's breathing didn't change at all.
Sirius was slightly shocked to see a bright white snowy owl tapping its beak expectantly against the glass. It had been quite a while since he had received a letter.
He opened the window and the owl stepped gingerly inside, a tightly rolled scroll fixed to its leg. Sirius quickly grabbed an animal biscuit from the table and offered it to the owl after he had untied the letter. It hooted merrily and poised itself on the window sill, clearly waiting for a reply.
When Sirius unfurled the parchment, he recognized Dumbledore's handwriting at once.
Sirius,
I hope this letter finds you and Harry well. I am quite envious of your living arrangements – in my youth I lived in Paris over a patisserie. Please have a cherry tart for me when you find the time.
I am writing to you with a message that may come as more of a surprise than a discussion of Parisian patisseries and I warn you that it may come as a bit of a shock. Remus Lupin was hospitalized over the weekend after a very severe transformation. He is in quite a bit of pain and has put you down as his next-of-kin.
Sirius lowered the letter slowly. Both Remus' parents had passed – his mother during their school years and his father only slightly after – but surely he had other family? Surely he wasn't the only person Remus had left?
Unfortunately, he is between living arrangements at the moment. And -
"Homeless." Sirius muttered, frowning.
- he is not fit to recover without someone to look after him. While I realize it may be quite difficult to deal with another mouth to feed right now, he has nobody else.
Please send your reply as soon as possible back with this owl.
Yours truly,
Albus.
P.S: I've enclosed a small amount of muggle money to see you through; I very much doubt there is an exchange post near you.
Sirius put the parchment down on the table and covered his mouth with his hand. He had half a mind to write back to tell Dumbledore to find someone else, but the other half realized that no one would take him. How many people were likely to take in a destitute werewolf on short notice?
Sirius glanced over to Harry, asleep in the pram and covered in pastry crumbs.
He set to rummaging around in the various boxes still littered around the flat until he found a quill and ink. He flipped over the letter from Dumbledore and scrawled,
How soon will he be here?
"Something's got you down." Ainsley said, giving Harry a chunk of dough to play with.
"A... friend is coming to visit." Sirius said, rubbing his temples. "I haven't seen him in a long time."
"How long?" Ainsley asked, leaning against the counter and running his hands through his caramel brown hair.
"Two months." Sirius said. "Last time I saw him I accused him of..." He trailed off. "Basically it was a huge cock-up and betrayal on my part."
Ainsley frowned. "Why's he coming then?"
Sirius took a sip of his cappuccino, "He's had an accident. He doesn't have anyone else to look after him."
Ainsley let out a low whistle and then pulled a large hunk of dough out of Harry's mouth. "He sure likes to put things in his mouth doesn't he?"
"He's incorrigible." Sirius sighed, "I think it's because he was half-starved where he was staying before I got him."
"Where was he before?" Ainsley asked.
He had found it very easy to talk to Ainsley. Sirius had come down to the bakery at least once a day, Harry in tow, just to talk to him. It was the simple way Ainsley asked about matters that seemed so complicated that drew answers out of him more easily than to anyone he had ever met. Even James, to whom he told everything, didn't hold the same persuasive personality. Sirius was also almost entirely certain that Ainsley was a muggle and the confirmation of that fact had been when Sirius had tentatively taken off Harry's hat. When Ainsley had only mentioned the scar's unusual shape and had said nothing about the Boy Who Lived or any other "bullshit name" Sirius had heard in the past months, Sirius knew Ainsley had no inkling of the world Sirius belonged to. So when Ainsley asked questions about his past, he had tried to simplify his answers into muggle terms. He had left out the parts about being tried for murder and being sent to prison because those were shocking in any world, but other than that, Sirius had been quite honest with him.
"Aunt and uncle. His aunt is a piece of work, let me tell you." Sirius said, "after her sister died, Harry's mum, they were given immediate custody and she wanted to send him to foster care instead of letting me have him."
"Despicable. I'm sure Harry doesn't need to hear any more about it, though." Ainsley shook his head and leaned forwards on the counter. "So, tell me more about your mysterious, accident-prone friend."
"Remus?" Sirius scratched his chin. "He's a funny bloke. Bookish, smart, but unorganized and kind of prone to depression and melodrama."
"Sounds like fun." Ainsley grinned.
"Yeah, we were together for two years." Sirius said, bringing the cappuccino to his lips and watching for Ainsley's reaction. When Ainsley didn't react, Sirius smiled. "I should know."
"Messy breakup, then? Big betrayal, you said?" Ainsley asked, taking the dough away from Harry and replacing it with a sippy cup full of juice.
"Very." Sirius sighed, swirling the foam around in his cup. "But I think it's good for Harry to spend some time with Remus - he's quite good with children."
Ainsley stiffened slightly.
"He didn't have any siblings, though. Nobody can know more about children than those who grew up with them." Sirius added diplomatically.
Ainsley let out a small laugh and relaxed. He ruffled Harry's hair.
"When is this Remus coming in then?" Ainsley asked.
"Unsure. I haven't heard back yet." Sirius said, realizing suddenly that it might be extremely hard to explain if an owl returned with his reply and began pecking at the bakery windows.
"Then do you have time for another?" Ainsley asked, lifting Sirius' empty cup and wiggling his eyebrows in a way that caused Sirius to burst out in laughter.
"I might." Sirius smiled.
Dearest Sirius,
I have heard word from St. Mungo's and the faculty says that an afternoon discharge would be the most convenient for all involved. I seem to recall finding you an apartment with a fireplace? The floo network would be the best way to bring him through because of the distance.
It might be best to give him the bed, Sirius, if you only have one. I have it on good authority that you took your mother's best chesterfield and for this, I am grateful. It was both an eyesore and looked extremely comfortable. Remind me to visit.
Yours truly,
Albus.
Sirius set the letter down on the coffee table and began to pace madly back and forth across the sitting room. Remus is coming tomorrow? Harry was asleep in the other room and there were preparations to be made. He needed a way to make Remus comfortable; after everything they had gone through he could at least do that for him. He set to frantically cleaning the apartment, starting first in the bathroom.
When he passed by the mirror, however, he realized what a fright he looked. He hadn't shaved in several days and he hadn't cut his hair since before Azkaban. He already had the scissors halfway to his hair before he realized what a stupid idea it would be to attempt to cut his hair in a bathroom with a mirror that was barely large enough to shave in. In a second, he had crossed the apartment, picked up the telephone and dialled tentatively. It had been quite a while since he had used a muggle telephone.
"Portobello Bakers, Ainsley MacEwan speaking!" a cheerful voice on the other end greeted him.
"Hey, do you want to do me a favour?"
"...Sirius?"
"Yeah. This is going to sound mad, but..." Sirius chuckled, "Do you want to come cut my hair for me?"
"You can't be bothered to pop round to the barber? I'm off in an hour. I'll come then." Ainsley laughed, " Why are you calling me from upstairs? Is Harry asleep?"
"Yeah. He's down for his nap. A bit later than I'd like, but... What are you gonna do?" Sirius said, leaning against the wall, the telephone chord wrapped around his fingers.
"He's going to be up all night." Ainsley chuckled. "6:00 is not nap time. You should have kept him awake until bed time."
Sirius sighed, "Thank you, Mother."
On the other end, Ainsley sighed back. "Be there around 7:00."
Sirius had left the door ajar and was elbow deep in boxes when Ainsley arrived. Sirius had almost managed to unpack everything. All that was left were a few odds and ends – pictures, mostly – that Sirius had been holding off on hanging up.
"Can I help?"
Sirius turned around and almost didn't recognize him out of his baker's uniform. Ainsley had let his shaggy hair down and was wearing a black jacket and a t-shirt advertising some muggle band he had never heard of tucked into a pair of ripped jeans. Sirius realized he was staring and looked away.
"Oh, no. Don't worry about it" Sirius smiled, straightening up. He felt quite out of place against the well dressed Ainsley. Much of the clothes he had brought with him were from the early 70's and were quite worn through and barely fit him; He was sure Ainsley had noticed, but, of course, he hadn't said much of anything besides cursory remarks about how skinny he was.
"Harry's still asleep. I'm actually hoping he'll sleep through the night."
He kicked the photographs out of sight; the last thing he needed was to scare away his only friend by having to explain why his pictures were moving.
"Doubtful." Ainsley said, standing awkwardly in the middle of the sitting room.
Sirius could tell Ainsley thought the decorations odd. Almost all of the furniture was in the Victorian style – dark, heavy wood inlaid with carving and covered in dark red velvet – but the rest of the apartment was a rather haphazard tossing-together of baby accoutrements, muggle books and records and a general feeling of disorder. "He'll be up sometime around 4:00 this morning and you will be quite awake with him."
"Always the harbinger of good news." Sirius said, shaking the hair away from his face and getting to his feet.
"About that hair, then." Ainsley said, eyeing Sirius with a mischievous smile.
"About that hair." Sirius echoed with a sigh, crossing over to the bathroom to grab a pair of scissors and a towel.
"Where do you want to do this?" Ainsley asked.
"Probably right here." Sirius said, walking back into the kitchen and hopping up on the dark oak table.
"I don't know why you called me." Ainsley said, scooting in next to Sirius and draping the towel around his shoulders. "It's not like I know how to cut hair. I just bake cookies. Maybe the occasional loaf of bread, but even - "
"I just can't see the back." Sirius interrupted him. He had learned very quickly that Ainsley wasn't offended by interruptions; there would have been no way to have a two-sided conversation with him otherwise.
"How short?" Ainsley asked, tentatively gathering and smoothing down Sirius' long black hair halfway down his back.
Sirius relaxed slightly against Ainsley's hands. It had been quite a long time since anyone besides a goopy baby had voluntarily wanted to touch him.
"Up around the shoulders, I would say." Sirius shrugged.
"I like it long." Ainsley said, experimentally folding Sirius' hair to see the length, "You don't see men with long hair much anymore. Died along with the 70's, I suppose."
"I like it long, too," Sirius said, "But I... I guess it's just a reminder of another time."
"Fair enough." Ainsley took up the scissors. "Are you sure?"
"Yes." Sirius sighed, straightening up and steeling himself for the inevitable sound of scissors on hair.
After Ainsley had ceremoniously cut off the length of hair in his hand, he passed it to Sirius. "Do you want to keep it? You could braid it and put it in a box. My sister did that when she cut off her hair."
"No, not really." Sirius laughed, tossing it onto the linoleum floor of the kitchen.
"You're not much of a romantic." Ainsley sighed, chopping through the rest of the hair on a slightly lower level than his shoulders.
"Never have been." Sirius said, immediately feeling the weight lifting from his shoulders as hair began to drop to the floor.
They stood together for about fifteen minutes as Ainsley parted Sirius from the hair that was more a reminder of his former lifestyle than a stylistic statement. Sirius swung his legs absent-mindedly while Ainsley chatted away happily about how he had completely destroyed an entire batch of almondine croissants that afternoon and had to feed them to the neighbour's dog in order to not feel guilty about it. Sirius laughed along with Ainsley, but didn't say much. In the past, he had found talkative people obnoxious, but after the silence of the halls of Azkaban, Sirius found the chattiness more comforting than anything he had experienced in many months. Ainsley was someone who had totally missed the trials and horrors of the war he himself had so recently survived and he found it oddly comforting that in this world where he had lost so much, there was still someone who had so much to give.
As the setting sun began to cast pink and orange light into the apartment, Ainsley made his last cut.
"You could have gone longer, you know." Ainsley said, brushing hair gently off Sirius' shoulders.
Ainsley walked around in front of Sirius and swatted at his shoulders, shaking long black strands of hair onto the linoleum. Sirius gave Ainsley an apologetic look.
"I didn't want to cut it this short." Ainsley said, pouting slightly. He pulled a long white hair off of Sirius' black t-shirt. "You're awfully grey for a 21 year-old."
"Stress does that to you." Sirius said, taking it from Ainsley and looking it over. "I've been going grey since I was fifteen."
"Amazing."
Ainsley began to ruffle Sirius' hair with his hands, checking for uneven length and missed sections. Sirius bent his head back to look up at him and when he did, Ainsley smiled. He rested his hands in the hair at the back of Sirius' head.
"You have quite odd eyes, Sirius." Ainsley said, staring into Sirius' eyes with such a sense of innocent curiosity it made him laugh.
"Always the charmer." Sirius grinned, only just now noticing the various shades of honey and cocoa in Ainsley's eyes.
"I should let you get back to cleaning." Ainsley said, his voice soft.
"Should you?" Sirius asked, enjoying the sensation of the gentle movements of Ainsley's fingers in his hair.
Ainsley cleared his throat suddenly and dropped his hands from the back of Sirius' head. "If you don't mind, I'll just pop out. I'm afraid me roommates are expecting to me."
Sirius nodded maybe a bit too vigorously. He could feel heat creeping up his face and he rubbed at his arm awkwardly.
"Wouldn't want to keep them waiting." Sirius said, watching as Ainsley grabbed his jacket from the back of one of the dining chairs.
"No. Especially Alice." Ainsley sighed, shaking his head, "You'd swear she thought she was me mum! Just last week I was late for dinner and she hollered at me for a quarter of an hour!"
"She your girlfriend?" Sirius asked, curiously. The awkwardness he had felt earlier was quickly disappearing. It was impossible to stay uncomfortable for long around him.
"Hardly." Ainsley shook his head. He swung his jacket over his shoulder and walked to the door. Sirius followed him and leaned against the doorframe as Ainsley stepped out into the stairwell. "I don't date girls. They talk too much."
Sirius shut the door behind him, locked it and wandered into the bedroom with a smile on his face.
