Disclaimer: I don't own Zoids.
Wild Card
CHAPTER II
It was during the rise of the zoid Eve when Raven was last spotted. By the time the chaos finally came to its end, he was nowhere to be seen. The whereabouts of Reese, known to many as the Blue Devil, were likewise undetermined to this day.
Lieutenant Thomas Schubaltz understood, though, that Raven eventually came to help Van stop the zoid Eve from unleashing the cataclysm of ending the existence of all the zoids and organoids on Planet Zi… a sign that speaks perhaps of setting aside differences being achievable even with the worst of blood feuds (at least in the face of adversity). With Reese, however, it's a different story for him; if her control over Karl's mind were not released in time, he would have pounded the DiBison into a pulp (killing brother Thomas in it) with his Iron Kong.
At least everyone would agree with Thomas if he were to say that he wasn't too keen on the idea of Reese still being at large. Nevertheless, that doesn't change things much for him now. He had always perceived his becoming a member of the Guardian Force as the best thing that has ever happened to him; everything was a blast since he heard of the affirmation of his application. Alas, at present, he feels like there is some sort of unexplainable energy – like an invisible noose - that regularly binds him from keeping up (as much as he wanted to) with the standards of the Guardian Force (and doubtless the Schubaltzes), like it was his star-crossed fate to be a perpetual screw-up.
Hating so much to be bothered by the thought, he took a deep breath, and threw it into the back of his mind, where he hopes it would stay, at least for the next twenty-four hours or so.
In half an hour, Thomas is supposed to report to Rob Herman, whose rank was recently promoted from Captain to Major. All the same, he wasn't in a hurry to do so, as he was expecting probably another sermon from him for some mistake he wasn't sure he did. He decided to spend his remaining time examining the photograph of the whole group in front of the destroyed Death Stinger… a cenotaph to their celebrated victory over evil. President Camford suggested that the picture be enlarged and made into a mural; Emperor Rudolph apparently heeded this.
Thomas approached the picture, studied his own features, and wondered why on earth he had to make that silly smile!
"Man, I really look stupid! All the other guys are much better looking than I am," He thought to himself. "I know I'm a nice person despite everything! Unless Fiona saw it from the beginning, I'll never get her to really notice me."
He then shifted his eyes to the features of Fiona. He marveled at her beauty.
"Who says she isn't photogenic?" he reasoned.
Ever since he laid his eyes on her, she has become his purpose to live. He knows he had been having some trouble adjusting as a new member of the Guardian Force a few years back (because everyone had the same expectations of him as his brother, Karl). Fiona has become his saving grace, making him strive to become better with each passing day. That was until he was dealt the blow when Irvine insensitively blurted out that it was Van whom Fiona is really in love with all along. It was like someone dug into his chest, ripped his heart out, shredded it to pieces, and fed it to the dogs.
At that moment, he started recollecting the time when it all happened. His brain played flashbacks of Van and his Blade Liger being knocked off a cliff by Raven and his Geno Breaker. In search for their missing teammate, he rappelled along with Irvine down the canyon where Van fell. He recalls Fiona being distressed at the fact of losing Van. He recalled starting to have suspicions back then, which were later confirmed when Irvine sensed his qualms and was just too quick and too happy to spell the whole thing out to him.
If it weren't for Fiona, he would have left the Guardian Force a long time ago. But now that his suspicions had truth in it…
"What am I thinking?" he signed. "She's only got eyes for Van. I can never make her love me."
As others find his situation rather trivial and hilarious… for Thomas, it was a nightmare. It was like his whole world came crashing down on him. Having the misfortune of falling in love with Fiona at first sight was bad enough, but having insult added to injury was even worse. He hoped that every bit of the taunting would go away… but they just wouldn't stop! What hurt the most, though, was Fiona being oblivious of his feelings towards her. The pain was often too hard to bear that he considered suicide at one point. Providentially, Thomas didn't pursue his gruesome plan. Through some ethereal manipulation, it became tattooed in his head that taking the easy way out wasn't the answer.
In his desire to put the whole issue behind him, he decided he'd be happy for both Fiona and Van… happy for them having found each other, and happy for them having a whole lifetime together ahead. But time and again, he imagined how Fiona could have been his. As much as he wanted to, it was hard to move on. It was so difficult to get over the fact that his first love had fallen head-over-heels with someone else a long time ago… the bond between her and Van unbroken by time, remaining strong as ever.
All Thomas could do for now was to close his eyes and take a few seconds of cogitation. Later, he opened them again, and then looked at the image of Marianne, Rudolph's fiancée, on the mural.
Marianne was the only person who actually cared for Thomas. She was the only one who believed that there was a way for Fiona and him. She can be annoying at times, but in truth, she has always supported him like he was her own brother, if she had one. Thomas felt that if he died, Marianne would be the only one who'd feel the void. Lightheartedly, he imagined her standing by his grave, crying over the missed chances by which he could have won over Fiona's heart.
"Typical Marianne. Always the matchmaker," Thomas thought. This put a smile across his face.
When everyone else would choose to solely reminisce the instances Thomas tripped and fell, Marianne would recall the same number of times he would pick himself up with grace and poise. She'd be the only one who'd understand how much he wanted to make his mark in the world. She was aware of how circumstance was often unkind to him. She'd be the only one who could deduce that if ever Thomas had a choice on how he desired to go down in history, he wanted to be remembered not so much as a soldier who purely follows commands, but more as an advocate of science who saves lives in the process. Strangely yet contentedly, he'd feel from her the kind of love a sibling would give, something he didn't readily feel from Karl. But then again, he'd cut Karl some slack. He knows he loves him (albeit not openly), despite that stern, tough-guy façade. After all, he's his big brother, and brothers are supposed to look out for each other.
"Thank you, Marianne…" he whispered to the picture, as if Marianne was actually in front of him.
Just then, he heard the voice of Moonbay approaching, chanting the same crappy song ("I'm a transporter from the wasteland…") with her downrightly unsupported singing voice. She comes out of the corner of one of the hallways that lead to the lobby, hands behind her, singing audaciously like she just didn't care. Good thing, though, she was nearing the end of her song. Those within hearing range of her gave out sighs of relief. She noticed the younger Schubaltz standing in front of the mural. He was still studying the picture.
"Thomas! Surprised to see you up so early," she said, nearing Thomas. "Careful, don't stare too long at the picture or those in it might actually scurry away!"
Thomas gave an almost indistinct grunt as an answer to Moonbay's humor. She, on the other hand, perceived an unusual look on his face; it was basically the same forlorn expression he has been wearing all morning.
"Well… you're not your perky self this morning," Moonbay exclaimed mockingly.
Thomas could feel goose bumps grow over his arms with annoyance on hearing the insolent tone of Moonbay's voice. "God! These people don't seem to know of anything else to do around me," he thought. He was amazed at how snide remarks such as that still affected him, considering he had years under his sleeve trying his best to numb himself emotionally against them. He tried as much as possible not to show his displeasure. Moonbay, however, took it wrongly and retorted at Thomas' paucity of feelings.
"Whoa, wait…" she continued, preserving the sardonic timbre in her voice. "Suddenly I felt this wave of sympathy for you come over me." She then made a gesture of shrugging something imaginary off her shoulders. "Hmmm, never mind that. It'll pass."
This time, her insensitivity hit a nerve. Thomas did his best not to let her condescendence distort his face in disgust. He tried to not to lash out at her, for fear of acting out another fit of immaturity. "Remember the high road, Thomas!" he kept telling himself until the turmoil in his chest subsided.
He turned his head slightly to Moonbay, gazing at her with piercing green eyes that looked even more unnerving now. Moonbay was taken aback at the sight. At that instant, it sent a chill down her spine that made her feel like her hairs were standing on end. She felt like a computer with a reset button that was suddenly pushed. It took her some time to regain her bearings, as she was speechless for a good number of seconds. That was her first chance to see Thomas look that way. She had always considered him to be this gawky geek whom she'd sooner ignore than take a look at… a slapstick who'd blush furiously and lose himself when Fiona would so much as look at him… a doofus who'd positively screw-up every mission entrusted to him.
That gaze he had thrown her at that instant, however, was indeed unexpected. Normally, when Thomas would lose his temper, Moonbay would simply disregard it in a hurry; in her perspective, a teed-off Thomas was tantamount to something trivial, like a teenager throwing a tantrum. But now something was definitely very eerie and different about him and his stare that it unquestionably shocked her. Did she actually see a small fraction of the sum of all his anger and frustration penned up inside him all these years?
Thomas saw that Moonbay got the message. Still looking at her with fierce eyes, he bowed his head a little in a civilized greeting. He then gently turned around and walked away. He was so amazed at how he actually got her to shut up! How he wished he could do the same thing to Irvine… as well as to his superiors, for that matter.
"Thomas… Uh… I…" Moonbay faintly uttered in a feeble attempt to express her regret. She realized she had gone a bit too far that time. However, Thomas was already a good distance from her for him to hear the apology. He was already on his way to meet Major Herman.
He finally reached one of the many briefing rooms in the palace where he was supposed to meet Rob Herman. As he entered, he saw him sitting by the far end of the table, waiting intently for him. Outside the window behind the major, Thomas could see that the sun has already risen high up on the horizon. He closed the door and gave his generically snappy and stiff salute to his superior officer. "Now I'm the one getting nervous," Thomas thought. Herman got up from his chair and returned the salute unperturbedly.
"At ease, Lieutenant," he said.
Thomas' physical inflexibility lessened a bit as he placed his hands behind his back and brought his feet a few inches apart, preparing himself to hear what the major was about to say. He could now feel his heart rate rising. Herman could sense the anxiety betrayed by the lanky lieutenant's rigid posture.
"Uh, Thomas, why don't you sit down," Herman concernedly said as he offered him a seat.
"Yessir!" came Thomas' swift answer, as he expeditiously accepted the major's simple offer out of respect. Just when he was about to sit himself down, he unexpectedly sneezed. He barely had enough time to cover his nose and mouth; some of the documents laid on the table in front of him flew and landed on the floor.
Everyone knows Thomas sneezes whenever he was nervous. It's another one of his traits he finds abominable; others find it very amusing on the other hand. He felt so frustrated thinking how he just couldn't overcome that particular drawback of his.
"This kid is really something," Herman thought, while sighing and shaking his head gently. He'd never seen anyone else move so uneasily besides Thomas. A corner of his mouth curled up in a discreet smile as he watched Thomas wipe his nostrils, itchy and a bit moist from the sneeze.
"Sorry, Major Herman, sir…" Thomas mumbled tensely as he hurriedly picked up the sheets of paper on the floor. He flapped all of the retrieved documents on the table and went through them one by one in an effort to figure out where each previously laid on the table before his sneeze sent them airborne.
"W-well, t-this one goes here… and this one I think was the-ere…" Thomas said timidly as he put each paper back in place, his hands shaking a little while doing so.
"Just leave that for later, Lieutenant. There are more important matters at hand," Herman said, with the smile on his face now replaced by a more serious look.
"Yes, sir," Thomas replied. He dropped everything on the table and finally sat himself down.
Herman continued. "I'm sure you're aware that there are still some factions stealing zoid parts… parts which they manufacture as weapons and sell in underground markets. I take it that you're also knowledgeable of the fact that proceeds from these underground transactions benefit certain high-ranking officials. I'm quite certain you're familiar with the former General Garth."
"Yes, sir," the lieutenant answered, his eyes turning bright as he felt a tinge of enthusiasm seep back in his spirit. Thomas remembers Garth quite vividly. He has been on his tail for some time. He had known all along that the former general was involved in this kind of untrustworthy business, but just wasn't able to get any military clearance to start investigations for the simple reason that there 'wasn't enough evidence' to pin him down. They dismissed it as a lost cause. Even Van thought the whole thing was stupid, and that it was nothing but a waste of time. He could recall the same words Van spoke…
Van: You know Garth's not the only corrupt official involved in illegal arms dealing. The ranks are infested with people like them! What use would it be if you'd go after only one? You might just as well go after the rest of the horde.
Those words made Thomas want to punch Van in the face back then. He was glad, though, that his efforts finally bared fruit when the both of them were sent to stage an attack at General Garth's place. The thought of the event being mentioned (and hopefully recognized at length) by Major Herman made him feel his morale rising once again.
"It was a good thing Irvine was able to infiltrate their network. I guess we were lucky he stumbled upon that Gustav carrying those stolen zoid parts," Herman said, interjecting Thomas' train of thought.
Upon hearing these words, the enthusiasm quickly dissipated. Thomas' soul quickly came screaming in anger. It infuriated him how Herman could just discount all the investigative work he has done on this corrupt general these past years. He genuinely hated the notion of someone like Irvine, an obnoxious ex-mercenary who refuses to be part of the Guardian Force, hog up all the credit for something someone else has been working on for a long time. It should've been him who'd break their underground network, not Irvine.
He was careful not to show his anger, though, lest he'd bury himself deeper into trouble.
"It seems I'm the underdog… God! I should be smart enough to realize that most good things are just too good to be true!" he thought. He just tried to forget about it. After all, Garth has been brought to justice. That's all that matters really. Not who gets the acclaim and who doesn't.
"One reason I called you here, Thomas, is because it has come to my attention that you have been after Garth for some months prior to his arrest," said Herman. "I've just known from Van, too, that you mentioned to him time and again about certain materials that can be used as evidence against him in court of law. You know that his case is still pending, and he hasn't been convicted yet due to some reasonable doubt."
Thomas stared at Major Herman fixedly. Somehow, he could feel what the major was going to say next.
"I was hoping we could use the information you have researched on this man to help clear the doubt, and bring Garth to justice," Herman added… exactly how Thomas predicted. "Could you give those files to me later in the afternoon?"
"S-sure, sir, no problem," answered Thomas.
"Thank you, lieutenant," the major said plainly. It wasn't the kind of positive reception Thomas had in mind, but as long as it helps serve justice, he can live with it. He was glad, nonetheless, that Van volunteered this bit of information to Rob Herman in the first place.
"Glad I could be of help, sir," Thomas said, with a fake smile on his lips. "Is there anything else that you wanted to tell me, sir?" he continued politely after noticing several seconds of silence following his last phrase. He hoped to be dismissed as soon as possible before the topic of discussion takes a nasty turn.
"No, no," Herman responded. "That'll be all for today, lieutenant."
Thomas got up from his chair, and gave his usual salute. He thought that the sooner he was out of the room, the better. But as he was about to turn his back, he heard the major speak again: "Oh, yes, Thomas, there is one more thing."
Thomas got that sickening feeling in his chest again. He had no choice but to turn around to face Herman once more. "Now what?" he asked himself.
"I have been noticing quite a number of blunders from you in your previous missions, Thomas," came Herman's firm rejoinder. "The worst was during your last search-and-rescue to Mount Isolina. Your serious lack of judgment almost cost your assignment's life and yours! You practically risked everyone's safety. You know from history how fogs complicate it's treacherous landscape. You should have let Lieutenant Fleiheit handle her removal from the ravine because he knows the terrain better!"
"With all due respect, major," began Thomas, mustering a little courage to reason out. "I had to make that call. I had to climb down the cliff! She was too frightened to grab on to the rope Van lowered."
He wanted to add that the rope was too short to reach the victim, something that was due to Irvine's miscalculation (for which he was stubborn to admit) that they had enough equipment to accomplish the mission. He apparently did not recheck what they would need prior to departure. He also wanted to say that Van – being the swashbuckler he is – wanted Irvine to tie the rope tightly around his ankles in the hope of increasing the length of their improvised lifeline and lower him down so he can reach the stranded girl. Thomas foresighted that what they planned on doing would be extremely dangerous, even for an ex-mercenary like Irvine. The slabs of rock he would be standing on were muddy and slippery. He had to sustain the load of two people (with one who'd expectedly shake in frenzied terror) while clenching the rope in an awkward position. Plus, they had the thick fog to worry about; they couldn't see a thing beyond five meters from them.
"Besides, I had Beek to guide me," is what Thomas said instead. But he didn't want to sell his friend Van out.
He remembered he anticipated a lot of mountaineering in this mission, so he installed special auxiliary gear onto his suit to help him in climbing up and down steep piles of earth and rock. He suggested to his two companions that he do the same with theirs. Van and Irvine, on the other hand, thought they won't need it, and instead, brought their own equipment. He barely had enough time to conduct a substantial number of test drives on his new installations because of the urgency of the matter at hand, so testing it on real-life situations definitely carried it own considerable risks. Seeing that the peril of Van's plan outweighed that what Thomas was taking on, he called out to them to stop whatever they were doing. Since he was the only one who could understand Beek's bleeping noises, he thought it would be best if he were the one who'd climb down the abyss.
Thomas: "Hey guys… whatever you're planning on doing… don't do it! It's too dangerous!"
Irvine: "Oh, really? If you've got any better ideas, c'mon… let's hear it!"
Thomas: "Here's one… I'm climbing down to get her."
Irvine: "Don't be stupid, Thomas!"
Van: "Yeah, Thomas. If this is about proving yourself, forget it!"
Thomas: "Will you two shut up? It's the only way… Beek, scan the rock face for anything I can grab hold on."
After processing Beek's input, Thomas wished himself luck, gulped in a fearful yet comical way, and started climbing down the steep mountainside. Just the idea of hanging over the edge of the sheer drop made him extremely woozy. He did some rock-climbing as leisurely exercises during his free time, but he never thought that the real thing was so much harder than it looked, probably because there weren't any ropes tied around him to give him a sense of security. While he was actually climbing down the steep incline, he made it clear to himself that he doesn't have an assurance that he won't be plummeting to the bottom. At least his 'upgraded suit' made the job a bit easier. The rocks were covered in moss, but with the modifications on Thomas' suit and Beek's guiding noises, he was able to tread over them without that much slipping. With the help of thermo-scan goggles, he spotted their assignment curled up on an overhanging rock, which was bit-by-bit eroding due to her weight. He knew he had to act fast before the overhanging rock's foundation wears away, bringing about an ultimate fall to death.
As he approached the stranded girl, things began to get more precarious. She became more hysterical. Her shaking and screaming made it hard for Thomas to grab hold of her, so he had to make use of some parenteral sedatives. Even the undertaking of administering the tranquilizer was hard enough because of the girl's kicking and shoving. Somehow, he managed to inject the sedative into one of the girl's deltoids. As the anxiolytic started to kick in, her hysteria lessened a great deal. But this time, the girl was too drowsy to grab on tightly to her rescuer. Unluckily, it so happened that the overlying rock had already completely eroded. Thomas made it a point from the start to seize one of the girl's wrists in case of any eventualities, that is, before she meets her untimely demise by completely disappearing into the abyss. Though he maintained his firm grip on the girl, the sudden jolt caused by her weight, on the other hand, made him lose his grasp on the mossy rocks, making both of them slide down the steep incline a few meters. He could hear the horror-struck voices of Van and Irvine calling out in the background.
Keeping his cool, Thomas pulled out a retractable ice axe built in his suit and jabbed it fiercely on the rocky incline, preempting their plunge to doom. He could feel the blood draining from his face in fright. His heart was pounding fast in his chest. While hanging on to dear life, he couldn't help but wonder what could have possessed him to climb down the treacherous terrain in the first place. Grueling as it has been, he managed to secure the rescued party onto his back. Afterwards, they slowly made their way to the top, and eventually to their safety. He was, of course, greeted by Van and Irvine's angry, scolding voices, telling him that what he just did was the stupidest and craziest thing he has ever done. Van was relieved, though, that everyone was safe…
Thomas suspected it was Irvine who relayed to Herman what had happened – as part of protocol, no doubt; there may have been a few unintentional exaggerations, or else the major wouldn't be acting so uptight. Thomas couldn't imagine Van Fleiheit, on the other hand, giving him away just like that. He'd trust Van with that sort of thing, and is truly appreciative of it. But time and again he couldn't help being jealous of him, obviously because Van had Fiona while he had no one.
The flashback came to an abrupt end when Thomas heard Major Herman make a retaliatory reply to his earlier statement.
"This is just like you: you're too dependent on your machines!"
Thomas' heart sank upon hearing the comment. Herman then turned his back to look outside the window. "Thomas, I'm sorry, but according to the recent reports, it seems that you've been acting rather impulsive lately," he said with a hint of disquiet in his voice. "Whatever it is you're trying to prove to us or to your teammates or to yourself… please don't pursue it." He then turned back to face Thomas. He strode alongside the table while tapping his fingers on its edge uneasily. He snorted inconspicuously before continuing voicing the rest of his concerns.
"How do I put it…? Um… While you were still in the academy doing battle simulations, Van was already on the combat zone seeing and fighting actual battles with real zoids," he said warily. "He's grown to become a much more skillful and seasoned soldier; you, on the other hand…"
There came an abrupt pause, followed by Herman clearing his throat. He realized he might not have used the correct words in his last unfinished sentence. Although Thomas was his subordinate, he understands how criticisms can sometimes be vicious, so he tried his best to at least deliver the message to him in a diplomatic manner. "What I mean to say is, know your limitations. Just learn to understand that you can't change who you are."
Thomas, however, couldn't believe what he just heard. As much as he wanted to express his outrage, he can't. At that instant, he wanted so much to put his foot down and question the major with no holds barred what he really meant by what he just said. He also wanted to know why they had entrusted huge responsibilities to him in the first place, as a member of the Guardian Force, only to find out that they doubted his capabilities all along.
"I hope you're aware that we have to take the necessary disciplinary actions so these kinds of mistakes don't happen again!" continued Herman, with the stern reprimanding character reintroduced in his tone. "So it's best you'd take every effort to redeem yourself in the future to make up for those previous slip-ups. Dismissed!"
Thomas felt like another stake was driven through his heart. He again gave his usual stiff salute. As he exited the room, he quickly gave out a sigh of exasperation. Even though the briefing had its usual dose of admonishment, he was glad this time it didn't take all morning. Infuriated as he is, he still maintained a mask-like face to hide his real disposition. As he briskly paced down the hallway back into the lobby, he noticed a glimpse of Moonbay in his peripheral vision. Apparently, she had entirely gotten over her penitence for putting Thomas down earlier, as she was obviously engaged in an energetic chat (which, in Thomas' point of view, looked more like a lover's squabble) with Irvine.
He felt his stomach grumble with hunger. He realized he hadn't taken any breakfast yet. It was a good thing he didn't fall unconscious from hypoglycemia back in the briefing room, lest he provides another opportunity for Major Herman to catch him flat-footed. He hurried back to his quarters, because he wanted to start Beek up first before attending to his personal necessities; he decided he'd just proceed to the cafeteria as soon as everything was in order.
A soufflé of emotions were gyrating within Lieutenant Schubaltz's psyche at the moment – resentment at Moonbay for her thoughtlessness, frustration at Fiona's obliviousness towards his feeling for her, jealously at Van for getting the girl without even trying, apprehension at Rob Herman's caveat, and disgust at Irvine's smug attitude. By and large, he wasn't sure to any further extent how to feel or what to feel first. Nevertheless he was certain of one thing – he's now holding a position requiring him to answer to disparagement and accusations.
Chapter III coming soon.
