DISCLAIMER: Thor belongs to Marvel and Disney. This story is written purely for enjoyment and no money is being made from this fiction.
Author Note: There is one review I want to address, because I think it makes some excellent points. Thank you to guest jaquelinelittle, for bringing this to my attention. In the Marvel universe, Thor's hammer, Mjollnir can only be lifted by Thor or someone deemed worthy by Odin. How then, did the giants steal it? Well, for the sake of this story, I will go with mythology version of Thor's hammer. Others may lift the hammer, but only Thor can summon and use its power. Since it was one of the only defenses against the giants, they stole it so that they would be defenseless and would be forced to accept the frost giants' terms to avoid bloodshed. As for the rest of your review, those questions shall be addressed in this chapter, by Loki himself. Also, in a further note, I know Sif in the movie has dark hair, but in the myth she has golden hair (like Thor's). I will be using this version. I hope you'll enjoy. Thanks for everyone's support so far!
Trust the Trickster
"Calm yourself, Thor!" Sif's furious voice rang out into the hall. Loki snorted in amusement as Thor shouted something furiously back. Obviously Sif and the Warriors Three had failed to talk some sense into his raging brother. He shook his head. He had to do everything.
"Are you still raging, brother?" asked Loki calmly as he strode into the room, expertly ducking as a goblet came flying at his head.
"Loki!" said Sif angrily turning towards him. "Take your tricksome tongue elsewhere. The last thing Thor needs is your mocking laughter!"
Loki's eyes danced with brief merriment. He loved teasing Sif. She was such an easy target. "Lady Sif," he said with a mock bow. "Charming as ever, I see. But wrong, as usual." Loki's grin widened as she clenched her fists and took a step towards him. "I come not to laugh at my brother, which would be foolish, given his angry state, but to speak with him." He paused and looked over to Thor. "I have news of Mjollnir."
Thor ceased his angry bellowing at once. He practically ran to Loki's side and clapped a huge hand on Loki's shoulder. "You have news, brother? Come, tell me at once!"
Loki nodded, casting a smug glance at Sif before continuing. "Of course brother." He slid out of Thors's grasp and began walking around the room, surveying the damage Thor had inflicted in his rage as he did so. It was quite extensive. "I have journeyed to Jotunheim, brother, and spoken with the frost giants' acting king, Thrym. It was he who stole your hammer, Thor, and he has hidden it far in the depths of the earth where none may find it."
Thor's reaction was instantaneous and completely predictable. His eyes narrowed in anger and he made a move for the door. "Then there is not a second to waste! Come, my friends and brother, we shall go to Jotunheim and retrieve Mjollnir, even if we must beat it out of the beast Thrym with our bare hands!"
Suddenly everyone was speaking at once. Loki watched with a slightly bored expression.
"Now wait just a moment, Thor, we can't—" Fandral started.
"This is madness," said Hogun with a grim expression.
"How could we possibly—" said Volstagg, pausing to take a bite of the leg of turkey he had in one hand, "We can't—"
"STOP!" shouted Sif, who had moved to block the door.
Thor walked up to her. "Lady Sif, we can't delay. Every second we wait the frost giants could be gathering their armies to march on Asgard!"
Sif held her position at the door. "Exactly, Thor. But if it was the frost giants who stole Mjollnir, why have they not already sent their army marching against our gates? Why are they not inside our cities at this very moment, slaying our people?"
Thor looked shocked. "I had not thought of that," he said, furrowing his brow in thought. Loki was impressed. Perhaps there was hope for Lady Sif yet. Thor looked questioningly up at Sif. "If it was the frost giants, you say. Have you reason to believe someone else is responsible?"
Sif's eyes hardened and she shot a glance at Loki. "I do," she said firmly. Loki sighed and prepared for some ill-formed accusations. The rest of the Warriors Three glanced curiously between Sif and Loki. Satisfied that Thor was not going to charge out of the palace, Sif left her position at the door to approach Loki. "You journeyed to Jotunheim, alone and unaided. Not even the fiercest of our warriors would attempt such a feat. How is it that you managed it?"
Loki rolled his eyes. "None of our warriors would attempt such a feat because they are fools who go looking for battle. Anyone may journey between the realms if they are not searching for blood. I merely went as an ambassador seeking answers. And I was given them."
Sif narrowed her eyes, possibly insulted by the "foolish warriors" comment. "And how did you even know to search in Jotunheim? What previous knowledge did you have of this theft?"
Loki rolled his eyes again. "My dear Lady Sif, please use your brain. Who else would have reason or even dare to steal Mjollnir? The dwarves? They made the hammer for Thor and have often been our allies. What cause would they have to steal it? The elves? They spend their days gazing at the stars. The Fae squabble amongst themselves and Midgard is barely aware of our presence, if indeed they know anything of us at all. So tell me, who else could have stolen the hammer? The frost giants were the obvious culprits, a fact that I was quickly certain of after my arrival in Jotunheim."
"And what of those on Asgard?" demanded Sif, her fiery gaze still trained on Loki.
"Sif!" burst out Fandral. "Surely you don't mean to imply someone on Asgard would steal Mjollnir!"
Thor straightened his stance and puffed out his chest. "Indeed, Lady Sif. There are none on Asgard who would threaten our safety in such away, nor betray us by handing it over to the frost giants." Loki waited patiently for her to get straight to the point with her accusation. He did not have to wait long.
"Are you certain of that?" said Sif defiantly. "And what of Loki? This is just the kind of thing he would do. He just loves to cause a little chaos, the safety of others be damned." She threw him a nasty glare.
"Here now!" said Thor warningly, but Loki waved him off. He did not need Thor to defend him in this.
To Sif's fury, Loki laughed. "Indeed, Lady Sif, I do like to have a little fun. But threatening the safety of all the people of Asgard is not in my repertoire. And as for anyone else on Asgard; the people adore Thor. There is none who would betray him like this. So I will tell you again: the frost giant Thrym is responsible."
"And just how did you find this out?" she asked, her voice still laced with suspicion. "Did you just waltz into the throne room and ask?"
"Well, yes," Loki said simply. He enjoyed the sudden look of shock that crossed Sif and Fandral's faces. Hogun looked as he always did, which was grim, Volstagg chewed on his turkey leg, and Thor merely waited for the rest of the explanation.
"But what if you had been wrong?" demanded Sif. "You would have given away our weakness to our greatest enemy! What of your famed silvertongue? Why not trick the answer out of him?"
Loki smiled. "But I was not. I knew from the moment I arrived in Jotunheim I had been correct in my hypothesis. Thrym was in a jovial mood, and he was expecting me—or at the very least, someone from Asgard. I decided a direct approach would be best."
Sif started to protest again, but Hogun interrupted. "What do you mean; he was expecting someone from Asgard? If he had stolen our greatest weapon, why wait for us to come to him? Why not attack us when he knows we are vulnerable?"
"A good question, my grim friend," said Loki. Sif sneered at his tone. Loki smirked back, but quickly became serious as he addressed his answer to Thor. "Because Thrym is not looking for battle. He is looking for a bargain."
Thor's brow furrowed. "A bargain? What does the beast want?"
"Well, he—" Loki started, but was cut off by Sif.
"Wait, wait, wait. Are you seriously considering everything he's saying? Him, the God of Lies? How can you trust him?" she shouted, looking at Thor, Fandral, Hogun and Volstagg in turn, outrage shining in her eyes.
"Loki may be a trickster at times, Lady Sif, but he is my brother and I trust him with my life," said Thor seriously.
"Yes, I know exactly the kind of trickster he can be," Sif said bitterly.
Loki sighed in frustration. "It was only hair, Sif, and I did replace it," he said. It was true. Loki had once cut Sif's long golden hair as a joke, but Sif was beyond furious. As punishment, Loki was forced to replace it with strands of gold spun by the dwarves. Now that was an interesting trip to Svartalfheim. A faint smile played about his lips. "I merely thought since you had proclaimed your admiration for my brother's hair, you would like yours to match it. It was a favor to you, dear Lady."
Fandral burst into laughter. "You have admired his hair often enough, Sif," he said cheerfully.
Sif glared at him. "I have not!" she said furiously. "And this is beside the point."
"And just what is your point, Sif?" asked Loki with amusement.
"That you are not to be trusted!" she burst out. "How do we know that it wasn't you who stole Thor's hammer and gave it to the giants? I think you would think that a fine joke!"
"Enough of this," Thor said, breaking in between them. "Lady Sif, do you trust me?"
Sif looked surprised. "Of course, Thor, I trust you with my life."
Thor nodded. "Good. Because I trust Loki with mine. If you doubt him, you doubt me. So let us have no more words about this and listen to what he has to tell us." Sif looked sour, but nodded stiffly. He turned towards Loki. "Continue, brother. What is it the giant demands of us?"
Loki gave his brother a grim smile. "A bride," he said. "Freya, to be exact. He wants Freya to be his bride. We must send her to him or he will send his armies to march on Asgard."
"What?" everyone in the room shouted at once.
"Impossible," said Thor at once. "We cannot give the fair goddess to that monster."
"I agree, brother," said Loki. "But we must tell the All-Father of this development and Freya. There will likely be a meeting to discuss what must be done."
"But what can be done?" exclaimed Fandral. "The giants will only accept Freya. You tried to negotiate other terms, did you not?" he asked Loki.
"I did," answered Loki. "I am sorry to say that Thrym is adamant in his terms. There will be no swaying him."
"We must go to the All-Father at once," said Sif. The others agreed.
"Let us go," said Thor. He led them straight to the throne room and wasted no time getting to his father's feet. After quickly dropping to one knee he stood. "Father, I must request an audience with you. Loki brings urgent news of Mjollnir."
Odin got to his feet and cleared the room with a wave of his hand. "What news, my son?"
Thor nodded respectfully to Odin. "Father, I think the lady Freya should be present for this conference. The matter which I have to relate to you concerns her as well."
Odin nodded, looking grim. "Very well." He summoned a servant to fetch her, and also called his wife Frigga to join them.
Freya arrived very shortly after, looking confused. "You summoned me, All-Father?"
"Yes," said Odin. "My sons have news of the missing Mjollnir, and they say it concerns you. Please listen."
"Yes, my king," said Freya with a deep curtsey. Odin nodded and gestured for Thor to continue.
"Father, Loki has just returned from a journey to Jotunheim, where he spoke with the giant Thrym. It was he who stole Mjollnir and now holds it ransom for that which we cannot give."
Odin furrowed his brow. "What does he demand?"
Thor glanced at Freya. "He demands that we send him Lady Freya to be his bride."
"No!" cried Frigga. Freya herself gasped. Odin shook her head.
"We cannot give into these demands." He looked at Loki, who had been silently watching the proceedings. "Loki? My son, is this true?"
Loki inclined his head. "It is true, Father. All other attempts to negotiate were ill met. Thrym will accept nothing but Freya as his bride."
"Very well." Odin looked even graver than before. "I must consider our options."
"But Father, what options are there? We cannot give Lady Freya to that monster, so we must march on Jotunheim and take the hammer back by force!" Thor exclaimed. Loki shook his head at his brother's thirst for battle and remained silent while Thor, Odin, and the others argued about the best course of action. As he stood there, it seemed to him that there was only one option guaranteed to work with the most success. But he decided to wait until Thor somehow managed to insult Sif by claiming women were the weaker sex before intervening.
"If I may speak," he said loudly. Odin held up a hand to silence everyone. "Thank you, father. It seems to me that there is only one course of action that will be met with the most success."
"Well? What is it, brother?" Thor asked eagerly.
Loki grinned. "I say it will work, brother. But you're not going to like it."
Thor started to protest, but Odin stopped him. "Go on, Loki. Tell us your plan."
Loki stood all and walked to the front of the room. "Thrym has demanded a bride and nothing else. So that is what we must give him. Only we will send Thor disguised as Freya in her wedding gown."
Fandral and Volstagg immediately burst in to raucous laughter. Even Sif cracked a smile. "The mighty Thor!" Volstagg burst out. "Decked out in lace! Oh, that is just too much!" He laughed so hard that tears came out his eyes.
"Oh, oh! Will he have a bouquet of wildflowers too?" laughed Fandral. Sif giggled. Hogun did not laugh, but his eyes crinkled with mirth.
Thor looked outraged. "What mockery is this, brother? Would you have me be the laughingstock of Asgard?"
Loki grinned. "Of course not, Thor. But this is the best way. You shall arrive in Jotunheim disguised as Freya. A thick veil will hide your face and beard, and when Thrym places Mjollnir on your lap for the wedding ceremony—"
"I shall grab my weapon and smite the giants where they stand! It is a strange plan, brother, but with satisfying results. Could I not just accompany Freya herself to Jotunheim?" Thor asked hopefully.
Loki shook his head. "Thrym will not allow any warriors into Jotunheim, I am sure of it. This is the only way. But fret not, dear brother. I will accompany you as your bridesmaid."
This pronouncement was met with more laughter from Fandral and Volstagg, and this time Sif joined in. "Oh what a lovely pair you two will make!" said Fandral.
Loki ignored them. Instead he turned to Odin. "Father? What say you of this plan?"
Odin was silent for a while, his eye looking over each of them in turn. At last he turned to Freya. "I think it is a good plan. And what say you, Lady Freya, to Thor going in your place?"
"I think would be very brave of him," she said with a twinkle in her eye. "And may I ask for the honor of dressing our princes for the wedding?"
There was more laughter from the Warriors Three and Odin smiled. "Of course, Lady Freya. I leave them in your capable hands. Go my sons, with my blessing, and bring Mjollnir back to us."
Loki grinned. "Thank you, Father." Thor looked less enthusiastic and he kept glaring at the Warriors Three, but he too said his thanks to the All-Father. Then both of them said their goodbyes to the Warriors Three and Lady Sif and followed Freya out of the throne room.
As they were leaving, Frigga hurried over to join them. "Lady Freya," she said, her eyes shining as she looked at her sons. "Might I join you?"
Freya smiled conspiratorially. "Of course, my queen. Let us make your sons beautiful." Together the women laughed and started discussing designs and patterns, while Thor walked sullenly behind them, mumbling under his breath.
Loki could hardly contain his glee. The situation was well in control now; there was no need to worry. Though he would have to suffer wearing a dress, it would be entirely worth it to see Thor in a wedding gown. He smiled with all his teeth. This was going to be so much fun.
