Alright I didn't need much persuading to continue it to be honest, I just really like writing this story so… :L Right on it goes.
'Beep, Beep, Beep'
The alarm shockingly seemed even more annoying today than usual. It then dawned on me that it wasn't just me being tired that made me not want to move, not even Harry's warm embrace around me…it was the sinking feeling in my stomach that I was terrified of the consequences of this audition. All I'd ever wanted could be gone with those 6 words "You. Are. All. Free. To. Go." It was stupid really, it's not like if I don't get this then I'll never get it, they'll be other auditions…but I still wanted it.
More than anything.
I finally got the energy to pull myself from Harry's arms who didn't twitch an eyelid at the movement (He was a deeper sleeper than even I was!). Turning off the alarm clock and getting dressed into the outfit I had picked out months ago; smart but casual. I made my way down stairs not daring to eat anything due to two facts.
I'd probably throw it up.
I believed I sang better on an empty stomach.
Glancing at the clock I saw it was 8am…my audition was at 10 and took half an hour to get to. Fuck. I couldn't just sit around here for an hour and a half. I wanted Harry…I needed Harry to be there for me and he had said last night that he was devastated about missing my last show so why should I be worried about waking him up now? Truthfully I knew why, I was scared he'd say I was being silly and to get over myself. I guess somewhere deep down I knew he wouldn't say that but I couldn't deal with any possible chance of an argument today so I did the only thing that seemed rational…I left early. I walked into the cold, polluted air of London and decided to head for a Starbucks I knew was situated around the corner from where my audition was being held; plus I knew a friend of mine that worked there on Wednesday mornings. The tube journey was filled with the bustle of people trying to get to work on time, or people just living their lives but this somehow made me feel worse. It might be stupid but if I didn't get this part I knew I would probably end up like these very people, in a dead end job; or at least that is what it was to me. To anyone else, in this current climate it would be a godsend to get a job and if banking or working in a office was their dream then great, but…mine was so much bigger and I couldn't end up in a dead end job. It would literally kill me, it's the biggest fear I have. With all my day dreaming I nearly missed my stop but luckily, luck must have been on my side! Only a short 5 minute walk and I was waiting in a long queue praying that Pansy would be able to take a break.
"Hi Pansy, You got time for a chat?"
"I suppose so" mocked Pansy as she jumped over the counter.
"You know you could have just used the door thing at the side?"
"Yeah but it's more fun this way" she laughed as we sat down at an empty table.
"So what did you want to talk about?"
"Well you know that audition…"
"Yeah the one today that's in 45 minutes"
"You…you remembered" I asked in awe of how considerate it was for her to have remembered it in so much detail.
"Course I did! I know it means the world to you so why wouldn't I remember?"
"It's just even Harry didn't remember that much! And he has to cope with me going on about it 24/7"
"Well I'm not Harry so that's probably why…"
"Yes I can see your not Harry, thank you very much. God the way you treat me it's a good thing I'm good at singing or I'd never get a job!"
"Just telling the truth" she smiled. Now I love Harry with all my heart but…Pansy is my best friend. If truth be told I probably love her as much as Harry, I can talk to her for hours and not get bored…which is exactly why I'm speed walking to my audition right now. I managed to be left with enough time to take one deep breath before entering the building and walking into a waiting room crammed with about 30 other men.
I had No chance.
There were varied types of men and they hung around in pacts like they would only stick with their own kind, reminded me of Hogwarts in a way.
The models.
The average's.
The one's you wouldn't think had a chance.
The muscles.
The arty types.
I didn't want to speak to any of them; I felt too nervous to talk but I didn't want to come across arrogant so I started chatting to some of the arty types. I made small talk but I tried to keep it to a minimum; happily the others looked like they wanted exactly the same and it worked out for us. It got to the point that all the artsy types had got called into their audition…actually nearly everyone had got called in apart from this one tall man. I observed him from the other side of the room; he was in fairly good shape, seemed nicely groomed; quite handsome to say the least but I could see a kindness behind his eyes as he was called into his audition. He gave me a polite nod and a fearful yet reassuring smile as he walked in; if I wasn't so scared I probably would have hoped to meet him in person some time but that's isn't my main priority at the moment. I couldn't keep still my hands kept fidgeting with anything they could find but…it came.
"If you'd like to come through Mr…Malfoy!" sang a cheery looking ginger woman.
"Ahh yes thank you…do you get to watch the auditions?" I said trying to make small talk as she seemed like a nice enough woman and truth be told you never know who people are and what their status is within the production, so you should be nice to Everyone.
"Yes I do actually! You're the first person who's asked me that!"
"Pretty good job no? Bet you've seen some right crackers today!"
"The best job! I love it. There's definitely been some good ones! Pretty good batch today"
"Batch? Oh so that's how it works! Were just like a new batch of cookies that you can throw away when you get bored!" I smiled. And she actually laughed, loud enough for the three 'Judges' to turn around and smile at us.
"You hit the nail on the head! Now break a leg" she whispered in my ear as she squeezed my arm and pushed me up the stage stairs.
I smiled as I walked to centre stage not feeling as nervous as I had previously.
"Hello Mr…Malfoy. I am Carl the director! This is Susan the casting director and finally this is Mark the producer"
"Pleased to meet you! And please since I am on first term names with you feel free to call me Draco if you wish"
"Thank you…Draco. Now if you'd like to start within your own time"
I turned my head and smiled to the pianist giving him a sympathetic look as he quite clearly looked worn out from all the songs he'd probably had to play today.
As I started singing I stared straight ahead as apposed to the 'judges' expressions. I felt nervous, I felt like my voice sounded crap but I had a revelation…this wasn't going to be good because I was thinking about the singing. I wasn't thinking about the emotion that the song held for me, the emotion I felt singing on a Broadway stage despite not have gotten the part yet…probably that I was never going to get the part. This is more than I could have ever hoped for, and I should at least show my passion for musical theatre even if my voice sounded below average. So I stopped thinking and…I listened; listened to the words, the meaning, the emotion and as I sang I felt love but I didn't cry even though my eyes were glistening, it needed to be kept in and poured into the performance and before I knew it my song came to an end. I finally focused my eyesight on the 'judges' Susan had a warm smile on her face but the other two seemed pretty motionless, but I knew I had done the best I could and if it wasn't good enough then…next time I'd try harder.
"Thank you Draco, we'll be in touch"
"Thanks! And luckily I think you don't have any more auditions to see today! You look exhausted!"
"That's probably because we are Draco" I heard Mark chuckle as I walked off the stage into an awaiting hug from the cheery ginger girl…I should probably ask her what her name is.
"Wow that was amazing! Really that was one of the best I've seen today"
"Ha-ha yeah right and you're naturally blonde"
"I am actually" she whispered in my ear as I mocked gasped.
"Wow well then I must have definitely got that part then!" I laughed as we linked arms and walked out of the theatre into the busy streets of London.
"Your gay aren't you?" she said as we stood on some steps.
"Yeah…how did you know?"
"I've got a sixth sense"
"Yeah right" I scoffed nudging her.
"Anyway erm I have to be somewhere now but…here's my number and we should meet up sometime" she said scribbling her number on a piece of paper…with her name on it!
"Yeah that'd be good, see you later" I said as we exchanged a quick hug and went our separate ways. I would have gone to see Pansy but her shift was over and we said we'd catch some dinner later so all I have to do is head back to Harry.
"Harry? I called as I unlocked the door and walked into the living room that was scattered with papers.
"Hello Draco, sorry about the mess but a case came up so…"
"Oh no it's okay" I said but honestly it might have been selfish but I wanted him to have asked about my audition as soon as I had walked in the door.
"Aren't you going to…" but I stopped myself before I asked him to ask me how my audition went because I wanted him to ask because he wanted to.
"Sorry what Draco?" He hadn't even been listening.
"Erm…nothing Harry" I sighed as I walked toward the bedroom to curl up with a book and my mobile beside me just praying for the right call.
It was nearly five o'clock by the time I had finished 6 chapters of my book and played an hour long game of 'Sims 3 ambitions' on my ipod touch with 'Holding on' by Alex Day playing in the background before I thought it would be wise to get ready for my dinner with Pansy. To be honest when I say dinner, I know Pansy and 'dinner' in her speak is a movie with crap-loads of popcorn and sweets. I looked in the mirror and saw a small timeline of photo's from one of those booths that consisted of me and Harry pulling an array of silly faces. I loved him but…he still hadn't mentioned my audition and he'd had plenty of chances to as I had passed his way to make a snack more times than I can remember. It was time for me to bring this up, and there was going to be shouting.
"Harry love, I'm going out with Pansy"
"Okay, see you later!"
"Oh and Harry…haven't you got anything to say to me?"
"Erm…I love you?" ventured Harry. He had been so wrong.
"Harry do you remember why I left so early today?"
"To meet Pansy?"
"Sorry but…you can't be this clueless! Have you got something planned for me?" I said a bit louder and with a hint of excitement as I looked in all the rooms looking for a surprise; truth be told I knew he hadn't but I just wanted this little charade to go on that little bit longer before it dawns on me that my boyfriend forgot about the thing that is most dear to my heart…well actually it was second after Harry…once.
"Draco…why would I have anything planned?"
"MY AUDITION! MY FUCKING AUDITION!" I screamed grabbing my coat. Realization dawned on Harry as he stared up at me from beneath all the papers.
"Shit! Draco I forget I'm so sorry! It's just work and…"
"Work? WORK? Right more important than me…if you had asked I would have not gone to that audition. It would have killed me but I wouldn't have gone. Fuck off Harry" I said calmly as I slammed the door walking toward the elevator ready for a lot of alcohol, a movie and a pep talk from my best friend. As I watched the elevator doors closing I wanted him to run out saying sorry to me again…but he never did.
He let me leave.
Might add more chapters because honestly I like writing this story because it comes from the heart. Love you all ;)
