Unorthodox Chapter 2

"VOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIII! YOU STUPID SHITTY BOSS!"
Awoken from her fitful sleep by Squalo, her new alarm clock, Yubi sat up and stared blearily around her room. It had been a month since she had started as the Varia's Cloud Commander, but even so, she had not completely adjusted to the room she slept in. It wasn't so much as the room that bothered her, but the furnishings. Courtesy of Lussuria, an entire wall of her room was dedicated to the core members. Filled with everything from stickers and framed pictures to plushies, it had been part of Lussuria's "New Member Welcoming" plan.

In addition to the countless stickers littering her wall, beside them hung large posters of each Commander/core member, complete with printed profiles tacked onto the side. Looking at them and cringing, Yubi resolved to redecorate her room on her next free day. Nobody needed to see Bel's blood-stained face in the middle of cutting down several men at a time. It should have only been one.

So into her thoughts about redecorating (read: getting rid of unwanted fan items and selling them to those of the Vongola who were obsessed over the main members of the Varia when she had the chance) Yubi failed to notice Lussuria at the door, knocking away.

"Yubi-chan, are you awake? The boss sent me to get you. Five minutes, he said."

And thus began the mad rush of getting ready and booting her butt out of her room and into Xanxus's office. Whilst flying into the room, Yubi spotted Bel outside the doors with a stopwatch, timing her arrival.

" 4 minutes and 47 seconds. Ushishishi. Good job."

Ugh. Yubi made a face at him and turned, facing a pissed off and wine covered Squalo, with Xanxus "scolding" him, his gaze now turned towards her.

"Fucking shit. What I say is what goes."

Not bothering to address the clearly annoyed and tantrum-ready Squalo, Xanxus grabbed a packet he had been looking at earlier and flung it across the room to Yubi, downing a glass of wine simultaneously.

"Woman, the little runt sent some fucking stupid official notice to me. Wants you for something. Little shit, who does he think he is..."

Leaving the room quickly, Yubi flipped through the packet, searching for Xanxus' stamp, finding it directly in the center of the last page. Seeing it, Yubi smiled fondly. It was the sole reason (besides the fact she faithfully restocked his alcohol) that Xanxus had stopped calling her "bitch".

She'd given him a large stamp that read "DO WHAT YOU NEED TO AND DON'T FUCKING DISTURB ME UNTIL YOU'RE DONE" and several dozen ink pads, just in case he decided to use them against Squalo instead. It had become his official stamp for mission approval.

However, her happiness at not being referred to as "bitch" anymore dissolved to confusion upon reading the contents of the packet. Apparently, Tsuna wanted her to take part in his infiltration mission. She smirked to herself. This was the perfect opportunity, just presented to her on a silver platter.

As Yubi slowly walked to room, making a list of the things she needed to purchase, Bel stealthily approached her way, ready to bother her until he was hungry again. Reading over the daydreaming Yubi's shoulder, he snickered silently and slinked away, calling Lussuria as soon as he was out of her earshot.

"Ushishishi. I heard Yubi was going shopping?"

"Eh?! Yubi-chan, wait for me!"

"Oops, was I not supposed to tell? Ushishishi. Oh well~"

And with that, Bel grinned at the complications he had been the mastermind of and watched as Lussuria flagged Yubi down and dragged her to an awaiting car.


"Ne, how about just one more dress?"

"Don't need another one. Besides the dress for me, you've bought one for Bianchi and another for Rin, not including the several you purchased for Kyoko-chan and Haru-chan."

"Ja, another pair of shoes? I saw this really cute pair of shoes that I think would look really good with-"

"Lussuria-chan, I can't carry any more."

If any passerby were to glance at the pair, their gaze would fall upon four pairs of arms, heavily laden down with what seemed like hundreds of shopping bags, the majority being from clothing stores and various scattered bags here and there from interior decorating boutiques. The difference, however, lay in the way the bags were being carried. While Lussuria carried his bags with relative ease whilst whistling and skipping happily to the awaiting car, Yubi walked normally, if just a little slower than normal.

Sitting down in the lush seat of the air conditioned car, Yubi's head could just barely be seen. Instead of dropping the numerous bags in the trunk like Lussuria had done, she had craved the comfort of sitting over practicality, and so ended up sitting uncomfortably with the majority of her purchases piled on top of her lap (the rest had been picked up and carefully placed on the floor by Lussuria).

Upon arrival to Headquarters, the first thing Lussuria had done was to call for a trolley to carry all of his newly acquired treasures and parade them in front of the core members. Swiftly snatching her decor items, shoes, and dresses, Yubi fled to her room as Lussuria turned the lounge into a fashion show, parading around and reveling in his new purchases.

"Squ-kun, how does it look? Nice, right?"

"Hell if I know!"

Annoyed, Squalo stormed out of the room, muttering about how he needed to kill someone, specifically, a certain ragdoll for taking him shopping. As Lussuria's gaze turned towards Bel, the prince turned into a magician, pulling a vanishing act. Bel hastily fled the lounge, and in his place stood Fran, as emotionless as ever.

"Are~? Senpai, what a chicken you turned out to be. Cluck, cluck. Chicken~."

"Shut up, you stupid frog!"

Bel's voice reverberated through the halls of Headquarters. Subordinates of every commander flinched at the sound of Prince the Ripper's rage towards the unemotional Fran. While most began padlocking their doors in fear, a trio made their way timidly down the halls. They warily approached the door they had been searching for and lightly knocked, afraid for their lives although they strongly believed the owner of the room was the most sane compared to the rest.

"Uh, Yubi-san? May I ask you something?"

"What is it?"

The muffled voice of a female passed through the ornate door. Sweating profusely, the men were relieved. A monster had yet to be awakened.

"Uh, well, I need to ask you in person... M-may we come in?"

"Don't touch anything inside."

From behind the door, the distinct sound of an object being thrown against the lock could be heard, making the already nervous trio even more anxious to approach. Jolting in surprise, they waited until Yubi gave permission. They knew enough from personal experience from their own commanders that doing anything without given permission was strongly advised against, for personal safety.

"Door's open now, I think. If it's not, tell me and I'll throw something else to open it."

"No, no, no! It's open, it's open!"

"If you say so."

The door was tentatively pushed open, and peering inside, a mess of a room was found. The large posters of the commanders had been (gently) torn down and lay on the floor, with framed pictures of glass art taking their place. The plushies had been set aside in a large cardboard box labeled "Donation" and all of the stickers (except for Bel's) were in another, smaller box since the Prince had stopped by earlier during his escape and placed a claim on them for target practice.

While two of the men hung back, one approached Yubi steadily, clutching a letter in his hand. Looking calm and maintaning a suave demeanor, Yubi couldn't help but stare at him a little longer than was necessary. After all, it wasn't every day one found a member of the Varia that wasn't much older and/or unattractive (in her eyes).

"Whose command are you under?

"Lussuria's. It's actually the reason I'm here."

"What's your name?"

As he handed the letter over to Yubi, his entourage had their hands clasped and wished him luck with the results.

"It's Alessio."

Opening the envelope enclosed letter, Yubi read it over carefully, and when finished, looked over at Alessio.

"Are you sure about what you're asking here?"

"Yes. Even if you don't pick me, I'd still like to try."

"Sure, but who's telling him?"

At those words, Alessio's sculpted face slightly stiffened. He was uncomfortable with admitting that he'd prefer Yubi give the news, but his chivalry won out and Alessio took action.

"I can tell him."

And with that, he confidently strode out of the room after getting Yubi's signature on the transfer forms and made a (slow) beeline for Lussuria, his comrades, once again, wishing him luck.


"Alessio-kun, Yubi-chan is my very precious baby! If you hurt her in any way, I WILL come after you."

"Sir, like I've been saying, you're misunderstanding something. I didn't transfer divisions to date or stare at Yubi-san."

"That's what you say, but they're lies. I never mentioned dating or staring at all.

"But it was implied..."

Eyeing the way to Yubi's room, Lussuria scoffed. The kid was an amateur, thinking he could fool the Lussuria and say he had no ulterior motives for transferring. Seeing through liars such as Alessio was child's play.

His eyes narrowed toward the retreating (and handsome) figure. They would have to be informed.


Stepping across the doorway of the Vongola mansion, Yubi was greeted by the rockets Rin and Kai. The mission bags full of clothing, shoes, and accessories courtesy of Lussuria went unnoticed by the duo, and both bags and ragdoll promptly collapsed to the floor.

"What the hell?!"

While the two sisters worked on cleaning the mess up, the phone rang insistently. Being the closest, Kyoko daintily picked it up, hoping it was someone she at least knew of.

"Vongola."

"Kyoko-chan, this is Lussuria. I need to tell you something very important."

As she listened with bated breath, her eyes grew wide and disbelieving. After thanking the assassin, she hung up the phone and fled to Haru's side, whispering in her ear the details of the conversation she had just partaken

in.

"Eh?! Haru will not let this happen!"

By now, several heads had turned curiously, for Haru's voice had a tendency to carry when agitated. They watched Haru grumpily make her way towards Yubi, firmly plant her feet into the ground, and stare the now nervous Varia commander down.

" Don't even think about cheating on poor Hibari-san with that...that Alessio!"

Tsuna's jaw dropped down to the floor. There was no way his cousin had actually cheated, was there? Then again, she had "entertained" a good number of mafiosos... He surveyed the room. Haru was lecturing nonstop about the reasons why cheating on a significant other was horrible alongside Kyoko who nodded in agreement. Looking over at his Cloud Guardian, he gulped. While Hibari Kyoya seemed indifferent to the situation at hand, his eyes told a different story, murderously burning a hole into the wall.

Ryohei watched in confusion as his boss slowly sunk down onto the floor, whimpering. A moment later, he glanced at Hibari and immediately understood. Hibari and rage were never a good combination.