Chapter 2

I arrived in France, after a long horrid month of traveling. It was very late by the time we had arrived and i was quickly escorted to the manor house in which my mother was residing. It was a large house, with massive pillars wrapped in ivory standing proud at the front entrance of the house. The house's inside, was lavishly decorated with shiny marble floors, plush carpets, with a wide oak staircase dominating the front centre of the house. Coming down the staircase was an elder woman carrying a bowl of what looked to be water and towels.

"Miss Lucrezia, you are here! My, your mother will be pleased, she has been asking for you non-stop since she learnt you received her letter!" The woman had a heavy french accent, and looked extremely tired and run down.

"How is she?" Not caring much to ask for the woman's name, but feeling a pressing, almost frantic need to go seek my mother. I knew it was to reassure myself that i had left Rome for purely selfless reasons, and not because i was running away from the problems I was facing.

The woman looks down, "Not well, miss! She has been getting worse these last few days!" The poor woman looks close to tears, I had heard rumours of how fair a mistress my mother was to her household staff, and by the deeply forlorn look on the woman face I could tell there was some truth to the rumour. I wasn't proud of the small bout of jealousy i felt at the idea of this maid having a closer relationship to my mother than my brothers and I.

"Take me to her?" I request rather rudely. I can't begin to describe how lost I was feeling, i was here to see a dying woman who had abandoned my family more than 10 years ago. I had come to France because I had felt it was my duty as a daughter, but now, the idea of facing that abandonment filled me with a sense of dread I hadn't felt the likes of since my wedding night.

The woman's face hardened, and I quickly felt the need to apologise for my rude tone.

"I must—"

The woman's back had already turned, "Follow me if you will, miss!"

I was lead up the wide staircase, and was taken through a dark hallway with dimmed lanterns that dotted above the portraits lining the walls. At the end of the corridor a heavy oak set of double doors stood, and I sharp pang of nervousness filled my stomach.

"Where is everyone?" I blurted out randomly, trying to distract myself from the rapidly approaching doors.

"They all left a month ago, back when her condition was thought to be contagious, miss."

"You stayed though?" I couldn't keep the surprise out of my voice at the amount of loyalty this woman showed to my mother.

"Of course I did! I owe your mother my life, miss. She gave me a job when she needn't have, and because of the kindness she saved both mine and my daughters life."

I once again have to fight to keep the surprise off my face at the woman's words. How could this possibly be the same woman that left us at such a tender age, knowingly leaving us with the man that is our father?

I don't have time to reply, we are facing the doors, and the woman is already reaching for the handle to push open the door.

"Lady Capello? Your daughter, Lucrezia, has arrived."

We step into the in the room, and into what looks to be a small living room area.

"Come in, Isabel!" A weak husky voice carried out through an adjoining room.

"Follow me!" Isabel whispered quietly.

We walk into the room and sitting up in the centre of the four poster bed is my mother. My first thought is that this isn't my mother. The mother I remembered had the most bright blue eyes i had ever seen, and had such vibrant red hair that fell in soft silky waves down her back. She used to be called the most beautiful woman in Italy, and before her marriage to my father, she was rumoured to have hundreds of suitors lining up to court her. This woman had none of the above. Her eyes were glassy and dull, and her once beautiful hair, had faded and hung limp and greasy on her head. Looking at her face, I looked for any sign of the woman who nursed me as a babe, and found none.

"Lucrezia, my darling! You came." Her weak whisper caused a rush of warmth to spread through my stomach, I wanted to weep tears of remorse over all the years i had spent motherless, and the feeling i had carried of being unworthy and unloved.

"Mother, how are you feeling?" I ask with strength that I no longer felt I possessed.

"Better, much better, I'm glad you came! I didn't think you would!"

"I wasn't entirely sure I would as well, but here I am."

The air in the room suddenly seemed to hot, and a thick blanket of awkwardness settled in the room. I had no idea what to say to this woman, she was practically a stranger to me. So many questions i wanted to scream and demand from her, but looking at her now, a skeleton of the woman she used to be, i couldn't muster the courage and kept silent.

" Come here, dear Lucrezia!" She weakly patted the space on the bed next to her. I sat down and looked at her.

"Why did you want me here, mama? It's been years since we last saw each other, surely you must have wanted to see Giovanni and Lorenzo as well, why haven't they been informed of your condition?"

I look down into my lap, feeling so overwhelmed and exhausted with it all, I felt like i wanted to sleep for 100 years.

Her hand gripped mine with more strength than I realised someone so frail could posses.

"I have regretted my decision of leaving you and your brothers with your father in Italy for years, but i was young and foolish, and haven't got a good enough excuse to justify my actions, I just hope that one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me."

Everything I had kept bottled up since I learnt of her declining health, threatened to burst free from the fragile wall I'd built within myself to protect from the tears, that would surely last forever. The lump formed in my throat, and i stood quickly.

"I'm sorry, mother! I've spent a long time traveling, and i'm exhausted. Is it okay if i retire for the evening?"

"Of course, silly me! Of course you are tired…ISABEL!" Isabel quickly ran into the room with a worried look on her face, that changed when she noticed mother was okay.

"Could you please show Lucrezia to her room? Make sure she is comfortable, and has everything she needs."

"Right away, mistress!"

With that I was quickly shown to my room, and left in the darkness to cry the tears i'd been holding at bay since the moment my feet landed on French soil.