I was so lost in thoughts that i didn't even realize that i was home.
i lived alone of course cause i killed my mom when i was birth and killed my dad 4 years ago cause i was angry on him, only because he didn't want me to have friends, and he was right, but i killed him anyway.
i just laid on my bed and thought of Edward, i would need to cancel the dates, i really need to,, i will kill him and i really don't want that, my less noble side of my brain keeps repeating: 'wear gloves!! Go on the date and have fun!! Just wear gloves!!'
i could do that, i mean, it does work, when i wear gloves i don't kill, but still, if he takes me to a restaurant it would be weird to weir gloves when it's not even cold.
i would really need to cancel the date, tomorrow, when I'll see him i will say 'no.'
But a part of my brain really wants to say 'yes yes yes!!'
i fell asleep after that.
That night i had an awful dream.
I went on the date with Edward and he reached his hand to grab mine.
He did it and fell down, i killed him!!
I screamed and fell out of my bed.
I really couldn't go on a date with him, what was i thinking?
I think i like him a little bit, i can't kill him, he doesn't deserve it.
nobody does.
It is Sunday today so I did chores.
When Edward would arrive I will say that I can't.
Yes I WILL do that, I will do that, even if I don't want to.
It was already 7.30 pm, he would be here any time.
Just remember Bella, say no.
My thoughts were disturbed by a knock on the door.
Shit, he's here, shit shit shit.
Okay, play cool, breath in and say no.
I forgot everything that I wanted to say when I opened the door.
There he stood, Edward in a smoking and a red rose in his hand.
'Hi Bells, you aren't ready?' he asked while he handed me the rose.
'Thanks, it's beautiful and I'm sorry, I forgot all about it.' What? Aw, common mouth, work with me here, it isn't easy for me either!
'Do you have another minute?' my stupid mouth asked.
'sure.' I let him in.
I stumbled to my bedroom and got dressed.
A black dress, just above the knee, it was cute and my favourite.
Knowing my clumsy me I put on my all-stars.
And some black, elbow length gloves.
When I got out of my room, Edward was waiting, when he saw his eyes almost popped out of his eye-socket.
He walked towards me but I quickly made my way to the door.
'let's go.' I said.
He just nodded.
We arrived to a cute, little restaurant.
The dinner was fun and we talked allot, but he always tried to reach for my hand. It was a sweet gesture but o so annoying.
Then it happened, I was a little lost in thoughts and he touched my hand!
The gloves worked but I ran away.
'Bella!! Wait!!.' He yelled but I kept running.
After a mile or two I thought I lost him and went to sit on a bench and let the tears flow.
I heard footsteps and I couldn't believe it, he followed me? After 2 miles he still followed me?
That guy will never give up.
'Bella…why…did…you…run.' He said out of breath.
'Don't you understand? I'm dangerous Edward, I don't want to hurt you. But you're making it so damn harsh.' I whispered between tears.
'Bella, I don't really follow, how can you hurt me?' he asked.
Of course he didn't know, I didn't explain to him yet, and he would definitely freak out and run away.
'Listen, Edward.' Oh, here goes my freaking mouth with his own freaking will 'I'm not what you think I am, with words it's hard to describe so I'll just show you.' I got up and went to a plant.
Putting my glove off me, I touched the plant and it turned black and then in ashes.
'you see? I'm dangerous, you probably don't want me anymore so I'll just leave.' I said while walking away.
I looked back and saw him sitting with a strange look on his face, it probably was fear.
So I walked away to who knows where, but I knew, starting now, Edward would be scared of me and never be my friend.
