Should have said no

Bilbo then decided he was going to have to look for a book in westron language. And so he continued looking on the bookshelf book. At first all he found was a large amount of books in Khuzdul. Only one book was in westron out of all the books on the shelves it was titled Dwarven courting for Dummies. seeing little in the way options Bilbo decided to read the book of courting it may have nothing to do with dwarves and coffee but Ori seemed to think it would . He looked around the library for a chair to sit and read . It seemed as though this library must be rarely used to have so little in the way of seating. After walking for quite a bit he found the perfect seat to sit in and sat down and opened the book. It was far into the book that Coffee was actually mentioned and its uses made Bilbo blush Furiously. Bilbo rushed to stand tucking the book under his arm unable to believe that Thorin would let him give coffee to his Nephews when it had such effects.
"Thorin!" Bilbo shouted. Then he ran off to find The dwarven King. Bilbo had to have searched half the mountain before giving up and deciding to simply check Thorin's chambers. Their sitting at the desk Thorin was writing a writing a letter with just the smallest candle to light the page. Thorin turned as Bilbo walked in and was about to say something when Bilbo covered his mouth with his hand.
" before you say anything let me just say why didn't you tell me. !?"
Thorin looked utterly confused and Bilbo removed his hand "Tell you what?"
"The effects of coffee on dwarfs you stubborn dwarf I can't believe you let me give that to your nephews!"
"I let you give my nephews? I knew something was off about that coffee! what did it do to my nephews and I? "
"You mean you don't know?"
"Just tell me Halfling! What has it done to my sister-sons and myself?"
Bilbo flushed a deeper shade of red opening and closing his mouth in an attempts to tell the dwarf king exactly what the substance caused. After several tries he gave up pulling out the book "Just Read page 454 Thorin. I wouldn't have known at all if I hadn't found this book in the Library today"
Thorin took the book from Bilbo and opened the book to page reading for a few moments he paused and his jaw dropped.
"Fili... Kili... oh no Legolas ! not the elf! Anyone but the elf! fuck! I can't go after him like this. " Thorin blurted out after a few minutes of silence.
"what should we do? it say the effects are long term if a dwarf drinks allot or even a full cup.?" Bilbo asked not sure what to do next.
" Not we Bilbo you. You must get my nephew before he can court that elf scum! And you are to return to my chamber after with him and his brother. They must be restrained until the effects wear off him. It is your responsibility to bring them to me since you started this." Thorin said " after I deal with them I will deal with you ."
"deal with me I didn't even know what I was doing!" Bilbo blurted "look I am sorry for what happened and I will help fix this by making sure they don't leave the mountain at all when they are back but it's not my fault so just stay here and wait it out ok?" Bilbo couldn't read the expression on Thorin's face and waited for a response. "Just go we will deal with this when you get back" Thorin turned and pulled over the paper continuing to write. Taking this as a sign to leave Bilbo began his search for the Kings nephews with the dwarf most likely to know everything going on in Erebor, Nori.

~~~~~~
"Your looking for Kili and Fili eh? Rumor has it Dwalin had to restrain Kili a few days ago from heading to Mirkwood but that was last I heard on him. I just saw Fili myself a few hours ago with Bofur not too sure where they were going though Mister Baggins" Nori offered picking his nails with a dagger. "You wouldn't happen to know anything about why the king hasn't come out of his chambers since breakfast with his nephews and yourself a few days past do you?" Bilbo refused to meet Nori's eyes "It seems there was a …. Cultural difference so to speak and that's why he asked me to find his nephews and bring them to him"

"What kind of cultural differences? Surely what you did could not be as bad you think?" Nori asked Bilbo
" Oh , but it was. I accidently gave them coffee." Bilbo said
"Coffee! Mister Baggins what a mistake you made. Simply put coffee is only used when courting someone." Nori asked.
" I know that now! my intention was to give them a beverage that hobbits have regularly. Hobbits quite enjoy coffee it doesn't have the same effects on us as it does dwarfs." Bilbo said
" oh well then mister Baggins I believe you have some babysitting to do. " Nori said.
"Yes I believe I do. If you excuse me, I must be going to collect the Durins.

"Yes well good luck prying them off who ever they've taken interest in master Baggins you'll need it" Nori grossed with a smile that promised nothing but trouble for Bilbo. "Yes well thank you Nori" Bilbo said heading in the direction of the front gate. If Nori didn't know where they were then it was highly probable that the youngest of the line of Durin were not in Erebor at all.