**********EXPLICIT SLASH**********
A/N - To the anonymous reviewer who mentioned Rick and Daryl. I'm sorry but this isn't Rick and Daryl. I couldn't respond to tell you that. But if you want Rick and Daryl I'm happy to oblige, let me know!
Chapter 2.
His groan bounced off the shower walls. He was bracing his left hand on the wall letting the water cascade over the back of his shoulders and flow down the rest of his body. His right hand was grasping his cock. He was bringing himself to orgasm thinking purely about what had happened in the kitchen two nights ago. Finally he'd picked up on the vibe. He wasn't sure if he himself had been deliberately trying to give them off or not. He didn't want to analyse that part of himself to be honest. He just wanted to come. Thinking of his voice and the way he'd spoken to him. The way he'd told him what to do. The way he'd ordered him to suck him off. And the taste of him when he had. Again he groaned as he reached orgasm and his seed splashed down the drain. He continued to hold himself for minutes longer as the shocks receded. God, that was good. It was so much better when he had a memory to think of than a fantasy. What he'd fantasised about didn't even come close to reality. He hadn't experienced anything like this in years. Since before Carl had been born.
It was not his finest moment he thought as he switched off the shower and grabbed his towel. He walked to the bench wrapping the towel around his waist as he sat down just taking a moment. It was so hard to just get time to himself, for himself. But he leaned back on the wall as he thought about what might have been. He'd found someone once. Like him and yet not. If Lori hadn't gotten pregnant he would more than likely have left her. He'd tried to be a good husband. And he knew he was a reasonable Father, he'd been a better Father before all of this shit in the world had happened but beggars couldn't be chooser's. He did the best he could and lead everyone. He'd taken the leadership because he got sick and tired of talking every freaking decision over and arguing and fighting about it. But he hadn't counted on the toll it would take on him. Or his family. But he still had Carl and he still had Judith. Which was why he hadn't followed him that night and begged for more. He'd wanted to. God had he wanted to. He was still so hot from that night that he got hard when he thought about it. Case in point he thought wryly. He'd only just gotten off and thinking of it again now was getting him hot all over again. Fuck.
But he needed to take the time. As he'd been ordered to. If he pursued this further he knew he'd be used. He'd most certainly be abused, that little kink with the wooden spoon was confirmation of that. And that meant marks and bruises. The whole idea of this was to not be in control. He wanted to hand it over. And that meant handing over control of whether he was marked for other's to see. Could he cope with that? Could the group cope with that? His son? They all thought they hated each other. And maybe he was hated. But he'd never hated him. He thought back to the very first time he'd seen him. His blood had just thickened as he'd looked at him standing there. And then he'd had to pull his gun on him and leave him. He'd fleetingly wished it was just the two of them there but that didn't happen. And when he'd gone back for him with Daryl he'd already cut himself loose. Literally.
Rick knew he'd never forgive himself for leaving Merle that day. And he knew if he said yes he wanted to enter into this...thing. He supposed thing was as good a word as any that he'd be paid back in as many sexually vicious ways as Merle could think of. And God, he was getting even harder thinking of that. He lowered his head to his chest as he sat there just letting his erection throb. Physically he knew he wanted it. And mentally he knew he wanted it. But...he was leader of this group. If he did this how would it effect the group? He couldn't very well tell everyone to fuck off, it was his choice. Because leading them meant he had the responsibility to be there for them at all times. Being leader gave him an absence of choice in that respect. Which is why he was in this fucking mess in the first place. All his life he'd been telling people what to do. Class President, Football Captain, Captain of the Debate team. In charge his whole fucking life. Which is why when he was with someone it was so nice to hand over the reins. He needed to be told what to do sometimes. And he knew it was sick that he needed it from Merle of all people. No one else here would be able to help him achieve that mental release via ordered orgasm that Merle had already proven so very capable of giving him. Even being told not to come was a release because that decision was being made for him.
And God was he grateful that he'd not ordered him to abstain until he'd spoken to him about the decision. He was so very grateful for that. Because he thought that might have just killed him. The amount of times he'd wanked off to that memory two days ago was already double digits. And he was grateful for the order to clean himself up. But, was he really going to do this? He had to make this decision himself. And he had to make it soon. Because if he wasn't going down this path then he needed to get himself back under control and strap that part of him down in the deep dark place it had torn itself out of when he'd seen Daryl show back up that day with Merle. They had saved his life. Both of them whether Merle admitted to it or not. Why he'd done so he wasn't sure. And he would never ask him. He was just grateful that he had.
It had been that night that piece of him that liked taking orders had torn free. He'd been on watch, the group had argued and decided to keep Merle around. Daryl had led him outside to wash-up before putting him in the cell. And he'd watched him strip down take off his prosthesis and clean himself up. As he'd watched Merle had seen him. But he hadn't said anything. That was when Rick wondered and when he wondered that part of him had shaken loose.
And so it had begun.
He realised he would say yes. Regardless of whatever Merle made him do. And how he made him do it. He would say yes. Because he was so very tired of telling people what to do. He was so tired of making decisions. For once he was going to make a decision that benefited him and him alone. And fuck what anyone thought.
Having made the decision he stood up removing the towel and running it over his head briefly. He realised as he did so that he needed a haircut and who the hell was gonna do that? Fuck it he thought. Same thought he'd had with underwear when it had gotten too threadbare to wear. It was just easier not to bother replacing it. His cock twitched as he thought how Merle had liked discovering he wasn't wearing any. He dressed in clean jeans, shirt, socks and his boots. They needed a polish too or they'd wear out even quicker. He wondered if they even had any polish anywhere. He'd have to check. He slung the towel around his neck as he walked toward the entry. Just as he got there Merle stepped into the room.
Rick stopped immediately. His hands gripped the towel around his neck until the knuckles turned white. Merle stopped and watched him. The silence lengthened. Rick saw him start forward. His walk was silent, slow and predatory. He was being stalked even though he'd already surrendered. As he thought of that he lowered his head breaking eye contact to stare down at the floor. He felt Merle stop behind him. His heat flowed over his back and a, what could only be described as a purr rumbled in his chest before he said "So you're answer is yes then Cop?" Before Rick can answer he goes on "If you say yes, you don't get to back the fuck away later. You'll pay in every way possible if you even fuckin' try. You fuckin' got that? If you're serious you don't get to say when, where and how. I'm the one that decides that. You don't even get to decide if you fuckin' come. You're all mine from now on."
Rick nodded still looking at the floor. All of the words he'd wanted to say dried with the spit in his mouth as Merle stroked his right arm down his back. It was a slow stroke. And cold as the metal on his arm. He couldn't stop himself from shivering as that metal reached his arse before rubbing over his right cheek. "Well then I'm gonna have this next. I'm gonna fuck this like it's never been fucked before. And then you're gonna suck me off. And if you're good and you do everything I fuckin' say I may let you come. I may even help you." Rick shudders as the words are whispered into his ear. His cock is straining at his jeans again. He feels Merle's left hand at his hip pulling him back to his own erection and his head comes up to fall back until it rests on Merles right shoulder. Merles fingers were digging mercilessly into his left hip as he ground himself on Ricks arse. He knew he was already giving him bruises. But he couldn't find it in himself to care as that heat surrounded him again. He felt like he was being enclosed in a furnace. He could smell him, sweat and blood and that smell unique to him and him alone. He breathed deeply trying to imprint it on his sinuses before he gasped as Merle's left hand sneaks around and grabs his cock in an iron grip. He squeezes it relentlessly as he grinds himself on Ricks arse.
Rick winces at the pain but his cock surges in it's prison. Suddenly Merle groans behind him and Rick feels wetness soak through his jeans as Merle pulls him back harder against him and groans himself. He gives one more squeeze of Ricks cock which is still throbbing so painfully and deliciously in his iron grip before he releases it and uses his right arm to push him forward. Rick stumbles a few steps before coming to a stop. His hands still grip the towel around his neck. He straightens up and turns around to face Merle but keeps his head down.
Merle stands there, breathing heavily. His head thrown back; his left hand now grips his cock. He looks over at Rick standing there with his hands still gripping his towel and his head down. Rick hears his breathing slow and settle. And he almost feels the menace enter the room as if it were a third person. He feels Merles eyes crawl up him, linger at his own still hard cock and continue up to look at his bowed head. He hears Merle take a breath. "Rule number one, you look at me, fuck that look at the floor shit." He almost sighed as he walked forward standing in front of Rick an arm's length away. "But someone sure did train you well Cop." His left hand gripped his cock again using it to pull Rick forward to him. "On your knees, unlace my boots and get 'em off." Rick let go of the towel as he knelt doing as he was ordered he unlaced Merle's boots and when he'd toed out of them sat back waiting. "Undo my belt, take my pants off." Kneeling up Rick undid the belt holding up Merle's pants, they were baggy, most all of everyone's clothes were baggy now. Belts were needed to keep pants on literally. Merle took his own t-shirt off as Rick got him out of his pants and underwear. When he was standing there naked Rick could smell his come. It was on his cock and in his pubic hair. He inhaled deeply loving the smell of it. "Clean it off." The words are soft accompanied by a thrust of Merles hips toward his face. Without hesitation he leans in knowing this is what he wanted. To be told what to do. His mouth opens as he takes Merle's cock in his mouth laving it all over sucking and licking off the semen with relish. It is tangy and sharp, flavoured with the day's sweat. Once his cock is clean he moves on to his balls and pubic hair, nuzzling he cleans the pubic hair of semen. When he finishes he sits back on his heels.
Merle jerks his head at the bench he'd been sitting on before. "Sit, and fuckin' stay." He obeys going over to sit down while Merle walked to the shower. He turned it on before un-strapping his prosthesis and walking over to drop it on the bench next to Rick. He showers as Rick watches. He is graceful despite his missing hand, moving economically as he cleans himself and washes his hair. As he runs his hand over his groin soaping it up Rick's cock again surges. Fuck he can not get enough of his man. This man who would gleefully shoot him if the mood struck him. All for what he perceives that he did to him. And Rick supposed he did. He was the one who handcuffed him after all. And didn't that bring to mind some interesting scenarios? Before his mind could head in that direction the shower switches off and Merle is in front of him skin dripping wet. "Dry me off" He says simply as he stands there looking at Rick. Rick has to fight to not lower his eyes as he'd been taught instead looking at Merle steadily he takes his towel from around his neck. Before he moves he raises his eyebrow at Merle as he holds the towel silently asking if he's okay to use his own towel. Merle nods his acceptance so Rick stands and throws the towel over his head. He towels the gray hair in a couple of swipes, it's not as long as his is. Then he pats Merle's face dry and continues down his body swiping and patting the towel over his skin.
He's enjoying it. His cock is certainly enjoying it. Before he gets to Merle's cock he moves around to his back. He feels Merle stiffen slightly as Rick starts towelling dry his shoulders and back. He can see why. He has scars like Daryl. Older of course and not as severe but they're there nonetheless. He doesn't remark on them. Merle may have said he could look at him but he remembers the kitchen when he'd gotten trouble for speaking. He dries his buttocks before kneeling down to dry his legs. As he finishes this he stands up and again moves to the front. Water is still dripping from Merle's pubic hair. He looks at Merle. He wants his cock. His is straining at his pants. Merle's is semi-erect and getting harder. He wants it in his mouth again. And he wants it inside him almost more than he can say. He wants that painfully pleasurable burn. He wants to feel the result of Merle's cock in his arse every time he sits down for days afterward. He wants to be made to feel it, every single inch that sinks into him.
Of his own volition his hand is at his own cock palming it before Merle can say anything. His left hand is at Merle's. Suddenly his neck is gripped in an iron vice. He winces as he feels fingers pulling his hair to tilt his neck back exposing him vulnerably. He feels Merles right arm slide around his waist and suddenly he is biting his neck. His teeth are worrying his flesh like a dog with a bone. And he is sucking on his neck. This causes Rick to groan loudly as he tries to undo his pants to touch himself while he jerks Merle's cock with his other hand. He feels Merle push up against him. He is walking him back toward the wall of the bathroom. Rick's back comes up against the wall with force but he is beyond caring. He finally has his jeans open and his hand on his own cock as he handles Merle's as well. As Merle pulls his hair and sucks on his neck like he trying to drain him of blood he begins to thrust at Rick grinding his hips against him and sliding their cocks together. He stops sucking and biting at Rick's neck long enough to order "Hands by your side" Rick groans in protest his eyes opening to plead with Merle but he shakes his head with such glee Rick can only close his eyes as he struggles to take his hands off his own cock along with Merle's. He wants nothing more than to keep jerking them off so they come together.
Merle starts thrusting at Rick as if he's fucking him. His hips piston into Rick. Their cocks grind together with each thrust. Rick cannot help grasping Merle's hips and thrusting his own to meet Merle's each time. Merle suddenly groans himself the sound echoing against the walls as he comes again spurting all over Ricks cock as he continues to thrust. Merle's orgasm triggers his own and he feels his cock spurt in return over them both. Merle leans his whole on body Rick as they both get their breath back. As their heartbeats settle down Rick cannot help stroking his fingers over Merle's hips and up his back before he drags them back down his nails dragging along the skin. Merle shivers as he pulls himself away.
He uses Ricks towel to wipe himself off before dressing. When Rick goes to move he looks over "Fuckin' stay." His words are a hiss. Rick wonders if he has done anything wrong. He hopes not because it felt amazing. Rick leans back on the wall watching Merle get dressed. His own cock is limp now hanging outside his jeans. But as ordered he makes no move. When Merle is dressed he takes the towel and turns to Rick. "Wipe yourself off." Rick takes the towel and does as he's ordered. When he's finished he looks over. Merle is simply looking at him. "Now take off your shirt." Rick obeys. An inner fire lights Merles eyes as he looks Rick over. Yes he's skinny now, most of them are but he still looks okay. "Now rub it onto your skin, includin' your face." It takes Rick a second before he realises what Merle wants. He wants him to rub the towel with their semen on it onto his skin. So he'll smell like sex. So every time he takes a breath he'll smell Merle and himself. And so will anyone else who gets close.
He knows this is a test. If he says yes then he's truly acknowledging that he's accepting this...thing between them. If he says no then it will be over.
