It was unpredictable. Confusing.
Pathetic.
I pulled away from him quickly in anger, I was not going to allow myself drain away in hope. He didn't love me. It was only lust.
His whole kiss was nothing, just a lust.
And before I knew it, I was out the door.
I wasn't going to let him say anything to me; there was nothing to explain. It was nothing.
My running ceased, then started to walk, and finally came to a stop in the middle of nowhere. I honestly had no idea where I was but it really didn't matter, I need time to think. Time to be alone. Tears were demanding me to let them out yet I refused.
"Kyo? What are you doing?"
Confusion rang through my mind hearing a familiar voice, perhaps someone that would help me. I opened my eyes slowly to see Aya staring down at me filled with concern.
But before any word came out of my mouth Aya pressed his finger against my lips to hush me. "Don't tell me anything yet Kyo. You must be freezing…let's go to my store and get you warmed up."
It was true. I was cold but I didn't realize it, I suppose I was too much in shock or in depression to notice.
Later I found myself inside Aya's store wrapped up in a blanket, his assistance was there to make me some hot chocolate, which I only stared at.
As I stared at the steam Aya sat down across from me in silence. I never knew that he could be so serious; it almost made me want to laugh.
Ironically I could not.
Finally the silence broke with him talking.
"Kyo, I want you to tell me what happened…why were you out by yourself?"
Stupid question. So dear god help this stupid man.
"…I don't answer stupid questions," I grumbled rudely not looking at him nor did I touch the hot chocolate.
Once again there was a long period of silence.
Finally I decided to pick up the warm drink and took a sip. The warm chocolate flavor melted into my tongue, quickly warming my insides. I felt so much better that I took a few quicker sips before staring at Aya once more. Sighing I could see that Aya's facial expression didn't change, I had to give him an explanation…of something.
If I tell him about Haru and what he did with me then…that stupid snake would laugh his guts out. I won't let that happen since I am in no mood for it.
Should I make it up?
No, I shouldn't since I would be able to make it noticeable anyway.
Yet I didn't want to tell him the truth.
Again I took another sip and thought carefully on how I was going to talk to Aya and looked up to see his stupid ass smile.
The hell?
"Kyon-Kyon" the silver haired cooed, "Your in love aren't you? And is too shy to admit it" His grin widened when he saw my shocked face.
I wasn't so sure if I should slap him or run…or both? Either one was fine but my body couldn't move whatsoever. "What was that?" I stated boldly, I very knew what the snake said but I just had to make sure…just in case.
"You heard me Kyon-Kyon, you're in love with someone aren't you?"
I found my face heating up from either from what Aya said to me or the hot chocolate, I was going for hot chocolate but everyone knows that it was not possible. "I'm not in love, stop saying such stupid things…idiot"
Only a small chuckle was heard "Well Kyon-Kyon…"
"STOP CALLING ME THAT!! Just call my Kyo!!"
"But…I like calling you that…plus its rude to interrupt your elders when they are speaking to you"
"Yer no elder of mine" I growled, he was annoying me and I wanted to leave so I stood up.
"Going somewhere Kyon-Ky…I mean…Kyo-kun?"
"I'm getting out of here! No one in this family can understand how I feel! I hate everyone here!! So get out of my life!"
In a flash the door was shut right in front of my face. I knew I was standing behind a very angry Aya. Taking a deep breath I slowly turned around to stare at his yellow eyes.
"Kyo. I may not understand you. But, you shouldn't say such harsh words towards people who try to help you…do you understand that? You haven't said a word so I took my chances of giving a guess. Your hot-temper will lead you NO WHERE!" The two of us stared for a second before he let out his cheerful happy smile "Now then! Sit back down Kyo and drink more hot chocolate. It'll cool your mind, hopefully."
Once more I found myself sitting on his couch with the blanket still placed around my body, listening to Aya's stupid stories about his past. Though I hate to admit it I actually enjoyed listening to Aya.
We laughed, ate, drank more hot chocolate, and I left to go back home.
Aya, that man never cease to amaze me…
I turned around to see him waving at me "Bye Kyon-Kyon. Come visit me anytime when your not feel good!"
For a moment I twitched hearing my nickname being used out loud in public but I grew used to it.
A huge smile came across my face and waved back at him promising that I would come back.
I walked back to Shigure's house to see what surprises lied within the house but shockingly the house remained quiet. Slowly I opened the door to find that the house was completely empty, no one in sight. The house was completely dark, so I made myself inside and noticed a note written by Tohru:
Dear Kyo-kun,
Yuki and I had to go to the shopping mall to pick up some supplies for dinner. There are some left over pasta if you get hungry. I don't know what time we will be back but don't worry since we'll be fine.
If your wondering where Shigure is, he went out as well but he didn't tell us where he went. So please don't worry about Shigure too, ok?
-Tohru
'Don't worry about Shigure' I kept reading that ONE part the whole time, which made me snort in annoyance. "Whatever, I never worry about that idiotic pervert". Then I rather have him around then to be alone inside the house…I felt lonely. I walked up to my room in silence and felt a presence I wasn't comfortable with at all. It was…
"I see you came back home…pussy"
My heart started racing harshly and felt Haru's hand touching my chin from behind. "Ha…ru" I huffed nervously "When…did you get here…without getting lost?"
"You think too little of me Kyo. You think I'm really that stupid that I can't find my way to any place? Did you REALLY think that I was in love with Yuki?"
My mind was going all over the place in confusion and brought myself to pull away from him "Then what the hell are you trying to say to me you stupid cow?" I was angry and I wanted my questions to be answered even if it meant to beat Haru to death.
A small smirk was given out. "Your so stupid, I was in love with you the whole time Kyo…just wanted to see if you could ever notice it. I may say that Yuki was my first love but that was only to get you jealous. It's about time I tell you know since you seem so clueless. So let me start out with this, I was always good with directions I know where everything is. I just pretend not to know so you could guide me all around…ALONE"
"Then why you care about Yuki so much instead of me?" I asked suspiciously "Not to mention when I asked you if you could love me you shook your head at me. What is the meaning of that?"
"My god you're so slow"
"Just answer my stupid question then Haru! It's not my fault that I'm confused because it's just all coming to me now! Don't you understand that I'm going insane? Why doesn't anyone understand or see that?"
"Oh shut up, drama queen! You only think for yourself that you never notice how other people really feel about you! I care for Yuki a lot because I know he cared deeply for me back then, you never did. So how can I pretend to not love you if you never cared for me? Plus you only wanted me to be with you back then because Tohru dumped you. Why would I want you, if you were just going to use me? It's not right. I want you to love me"
Guilt came all over my body. And I fell on me knees holding back tears "Haru, your right…I never cared for anyone…because…maybe…its part of my curse. You deserve better Haru…so it's better if you forget about me"
Nothing else was said. So I assumed Haru didn't want me anymore, I could understand that since I misjudged him. "I'm sorry Haru…I…I'll leave then…so…I mean…there are a lot of better people…I'm no good for you…well…I'll see you later" God! I sounded so weak…I need to get out before he sees me crying.
"…No…you're not going anywhere"
"No, I have to go…I can't face you right now" I opened the door as quick as I could but Haru was so much faster that he slammed the door in front of my face from behind. Shocked I turned to look at him to meet with his lips against mine. I muffled, smacking his hands against his shoulders. I don't deserve him! He deserves so much better…why did he still want me!
"Haru?"
I blinked to hear Yuki calling out Haru's name and the cow pulled away from me to see a shocked Yuki and Tohru. Then I saw it, Haru's saddened face…no…he still loved Yuki…he said he loved me but in reality he was in love with Yuki…trying to get YUKI jealous…
I backed away slowly in tears "Haru…thanks for lying to me…for a second…I hoped that someone might love me…and…that it'd be you. That hope was for naught. Its better if you didn't love me anyway…"
Dramatic?
Yes, I admit I was but I…I felt that Haru did love me…perhaps he did…and when he started to care for Yuki he fell for him without knowing. It pained me deeply but no words of complaint could come through my mouth.
"KYO!!"
Sobbing I turned to see who called and my eyes widened to see Haru chasing after me in full speed.
"WHAT THE HELL??" (Kyo)
"Come back here Kyo!! I'm not letting you go even if you don't want me!!" (Haru)
"Get the hell away from me you moron!! GO back to Yuki and fuck his little ass!! I'm sure he'll spread his legs and allow you to stick you big ass dick inside him!!" (Kyo)
"The fuck is wrong with you? Didn't I tell you I was in love with YOU??" (Haru)
"Shut up I saw you giving him that 'look' of lust just then" (Kyo)
"Well! You're thinking crazy you stupid pussy cat!!" (Haru)
Ohhhh…that did it for me, I was going to kill the white haired kid if he liked it or not. He was REALLY pushing it today.
"You know NOTHING about me!!" I shouted on the top of my lungs and lunged at him.
To be continued…
Yes, it took me so long just to make this…er…chapter? I take forever to update since I got now finals…damn straight hate them.
Anyway please review…not really satisfied with 3 or 4 reviews…or maybe it was five? Whatever XP
