Title: This is Not a Love Story

Pairing: Brittany / Santana

Sub-pairings: Tina/Artie; Quinn/Mike, I really don't care about the others' love-lives, LOL

Rating: T

Summary: Santana Lopez is a high-maintenance girl. Brittany Pierce is an outgoing, go-with-the-flow type of girl. They can never be more different from each other. They say opposites attract. But then again, they say opposites clash as well.

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. Thank heavens.

A/N: Warning: Mild-racism and other political incorrectness. Views of the characters are entirely their own and do not reflect the author's views. At all.

All mistakes are mine, will proof-read another time, etc.


Chapter two


xox

"Yo, Britt," Tina called out to her blonde friend as she entered her home uninvited. "Wow, I see you've put up new pictures," she added, highly impressed.

Tina always thought Brittany's house looks more like an art gallery. She had advised her friend many times to just open one up and put them for auction or reproduce and sell them. She's sure that Brittany would make more money that way instead of just waiting for those cheques she receives from time to time. But Brittany always insisted that she liked the field work too much to even think of settling down on one place.

"Hey," Brittany crouched down a bit so her friend can reach her cheek for a kiss, her attention still on the new 12R-sized print she's adding in her collage.

"Where's Oma?"

"At the store," Brittany answered absentmindedly referring to her housekeeper whom she considers family.

When her parents died in a plane crash when she was twelve, Oma is the one who took care of her and loved her like her own. Oma is an old-maiden so like Brittany, she didn't have a family of her own so the bond between them only grew stronger through time, forgetting labels and their supposed role in life. It is partly due to her that Brittany is what she is now as Oma continued to foster the same values her parents find admirable in a person. And for that and more, she's grateful of her and loves her dearly.

When Brittany was happy with the positioning of the print, she turned back to her friend who had already made herself comfortable on the couch with two bottles of water in hand. She immediately jumped next to her and tucked her legs under her as she reached for one of the bottles.

"So, how's the date?" Brittany asked as she sips her water.

"It's not a date but… it's great. He's great as always," Tina blushed demurely.

"I thought you and Artie are…" Brittany eyed her friend.

"Artie and I are friends," Tina finished for her, almost despondently. "You know that, you dated him."

"I did?" Brittany deadpanned but couldn't stop her grin when Tina slapped her arm.

"Yes, you did. Back in high school," Tina laughed. "Anyway, I'm not here about that. I'm here because…" Tina paused for more suspense wanting her friend to beg.

When Brittany just stared at her blankly, she gave in "…you're gonna love me."

"I already do," Brittany winked and smiled cheekily.

Tina blushed despite being used to Brittany and her sweet and charming ways for a long time now. She's still not over how anyone can shoot her friend down, thinking back to two days ago. That girl must have had super powers to be able to resist her charm or just a downright bitch. Now, she's not entirely sure if she should tell Brittany.

"Okay, I realize that I'd probably gonna regret this and hate myself for it but I'm only telling you because I'm really proud of my gossiping skills," Tina warned her. She's pretty well known for it back in high school and now she rarely has the chance to brag about what she knows.

She took Brittany's blank stare as a sign to continue. "Okay, remember Mike?" At her friend's casual nod, she added, "I gave him your number."

Brittany scratched the back of her neck as she eyed her friend curiously. She's pretty sure that Tina is into Mike. "Alright… He's not really my type but sure, I'll go out with him," the blonde clicked her tongue with a half shrug.

Tina's eyes widened, alarmed. "No, no, that's not what I meant," she backtracked as she shook her head adamantly.

The shorter girl sighed. This is not the reaction she was hoping for. At all.

She wanted her friend to… I don't know… say… look at her with admiration and excitement? Probably… I don't know… drop to her knees and beg her for information? Possibly even… maybe… I don't know… bribe her with gifts and her servitude?

Okay, so she had obviously thought about this for a while. Big deal.

She looked at her friend who was still staring at her blankly. Tina shook her head. She probably just needed to change her tactics.

"Okay," she started again more confidently. "Remember the girl from the club?"

Brittany looked at her friend incredulously. "Duh. You of all people know how I get with these sorts of things," Brittany reminded her friend.

Tina smiled mischievously noting the glint in blue eyes when she mentioned the girl. Finally. This is going to be fun.

"Well… what if I tell you I know how you could see her again?" Tina smirked, eyes gleaming with mirth.

On cue, Brittany's eyes widened—eyes full of hope and endless possibilities. "H-how?" Brittany shot from her seat to kneel closer to her friend, forcefully grabbing her arms and shaking her wildly.

Tina faked a yawn and disentangled herself from the blonde. "Oh, I'm so tiiiirrred… I think I'm gonna recline here first. Can you move?"

Brittany scratched her head, lost on why her friend is changing the topic. They were just getting to the best part. But she moved nonetheless and hesitantly stood up as she just watched her friend getting comfortable in the couch.

"Oh, and while you're up, can you open your best wine and order pizza? You're paying by the way, but I don't have to tell you that. Oh, also, can you get me a comforter, it's a little chilly in here. And put in…"

"What are you doing?" Brittany finally got her bearings back as she eyed Tina suspiciously.

Tina watched her friend incredulously. "This is how it works. I give you everything you want to know, but you have to give me everything I want first. It's in the ten commandments or something."

"No, it's not."

"Fine. I made that up. But still, you have to do what I say. I promise you it's gonna be worth it."

"Oh. So this is how you want to play, huh?" Brittany nodded her headed and cracked her joints, getting ready for another epic battle of wits.

Tina just grinned smugly, completely satisfied and sure of herself.

"How would I know I could trust you and that you would hold your end of the bargain?" Brittany challenged, tilting her head to the side.

"Because my Mike just so happens to be friends with her." Tina beamed, thinking it wouldn't hurt to give her another hint.

"But you already gave him my number."

"Yeah, so?" Tina asked, missing her point.

"So…" Brittany caught the smaller girl's wrists and dragged her lazy butt off of the couch and plopped herself lengthwise in it instead, resting her head on her hands. "I'll just have to wait for him to text me."

Tina scoffed, rubbing her tailbone where it hit the floor. "Well…" she searched her mind for one last ammunition. "I'll just have to text him to call it off then. Ha!" Tina raised her arm pointing at the blonde in victory.

"Not when I have you phone." Brittany raised her eyebrow, waving a cell phone in her hand.

"How did you… But it's in…" Tina's eyes widened in awe as she searched her pockets in vain. "Oh, you're good," she finally conceded.

"I know." Brittany grinned triumphantly.

"You're no fun," Tina huffed as she slumped dejectedly in one of the armchairs. "So… do you want to know how I knew?"

"Nah, you're just gonna tell me anyway."

"At least, give me something! I'll take anything!" Tina begged.

Brittany chuckled at her friend's desperation. She's really making this hard on her.

"Alright," she conceded. "How about, if we get together, I'm gonna name our first child after you."

"A child? Already?"

Brittany merely shrugged. "Life's short. The first chance I get into her pants, I'm gonna make sure I get her pregnant," she deadpanned.

Tina laughed at her friend's humour. "Alright, I'll take it."

"Nice doing business with you, partner." Brittany reached her hand out and they shook on it.

xox


"Ugh, I can't believe you are friends with Rachel!" Quinn whined as she went to La Casa Lopez's pool area.

"I can't believe I'm friends with her, either," Santana commented thoughtlessly, as she examined her new nail polish. She is currently reclining in a $5000 intricately woven rattan lounge chair in her black bikini with her personal masseur working on her feet and legs, a help carrying an umbrella for her, and another on standby ready to serve her every whim.

Santana met Rachel in NYADA where both of them are majoring in Performance Arts. Turns out, they are both from Ohio but Rachel went to this thug public high school for the poor called McSomething where they probably learn how to rob banks and beg for money.

At first, they didn't know each other. Well, everybody knew Santana—she is, after all, God's gift to this miserable, basic human race and she just can't help but stand out in whatever she does and doesn't do. But Rachel is what you call, for the lack of a better term, a loser. So like the saint that she is, Santana took her under her wing and made her do her term papers for her and carry her books and bag around—it's a win-win.

They only became sort of friends when they were both casted as Anita and Maria, respectively in the contemporary version of West Side Story for one of their class projects in sophomore year. And here they are now, two years later, in their last year of college, about to start to become the world's finest' new performers, with Rachel probably doing Way-Off Broadway stints, living in a dingy apartment with her cats as an old-maid and Santana, never aging a day, starring in The Real Housewives of Ohio or a "leaked" sex scandal—whichever comes first.

Santana can't help it. Rachel grew on her. Whenever she gets sad and lonely, Rachel's mere presence alone reminds her how much better her life is and she almost immediately pops right back up. It also helps that Rachel has a funny face.

"Why, what did she do now?" Santana eyed her bff as she shoo-ed her staff away to their other menial jobs around the mansion.

"Well, Mike and I are casually hanging out at my house, then Rachel video-calls me—you know how she is…" Santana merely nodded, scrunching her face in disgust. Rachel insists on video-calls so people would see the emotions on her face when she talks. Whenever she calls her, Santana puts her on speaker and lays her phone face down so she would be spared from the nightmares.

"And then Mike pops in to say 'hi' and then, she has this huge grin, like she's judging us!" Quinn finished, waving her arms in exasperation.

Santana smirked at her friend. "How was she judging you?" she asked as if she didn't know already.

"Like, I don't know… like we're a couple or something and that we're hiding something… I don't know… It just doesn't make any sense!" Quinn huffed.

"Oh, I think it makes sense," Santana sing-sang teasingly.

Quinn eyed her, not so affably. "Don't tell me you too."

The Latina faked shock and sympathy as she dramatically reached her hand on her chest. "Oh, I am with you. That girl is a complete nutzo. Crazy, crazy girl, that one is! Cc-raaaaaa-zy!"

The blonde continued to eye her friend, waiting for her to continue but the Latina didn't as she resumed her comfortable position on the lounge chair, bringing down her Dior sunglasses to her eyes. Quinn sighed contentedly and settled to her own chair to enjoy the rest of the sun, thinking the conversation is over.

"So have you found out?" Santana broke the silence after a minute.

"Found out what?"

"Mike." Santana simply says, still with a straight face. "Is he or isn't she a lesbian dressing like a man?"

Quinn sighed exasperatedly. "For the millionth time, Santana, you need to stop with the lesbian jokes on him!"

"What?" Santana shrugged nonchalantly. "Who says I'm joking? I'm genuinely curious. I mean, that 'boy' is too neat and proper to be a straight guy. He is obviously not a gay boy since I've caught her staring at my boobs and ass a couple of times so…"

"He is a guy! He has a penis for god sake!"

Santana merely shrugged again. "For all I know she just likes to wear strap ons and socks down there like Brandon Teena. Unless…"

Quinn eyed her friend, irritated. "Unless?"

Santana smirked, getting harder to maintain a straight face. "Unless you're talking from experience," she teased, finally letting out a Cheshire grin.

"I hate you!" Quinn slapped her friend's arm, earning a full fit of giggle from the Latina. "Fine! You know what, I don't know if he's a boy or a girl and I don't care either. Because he and I are just friends."

Santana continued to laugh at her friend's defensiveness.

"Besides," Quinn continued in a softer, sadder tone. "He likes someone else. He just went out with this girl named Tina and they're going out again this week."

Santana feigned sympathy, thinking Quinn is being overdramatic. "Aww, is little Quinny jea-wous?" she cooed in her baby-talk voice.

"I am not," Quinn chuckled and shrugged half-heartedly still with a serious, contemplative tone. "They both come from an Asian family so they have a lot in common," Quinn shrugged, almost dejectedly.

Santana bit her lip, knowing they are now in serious territory. Quinn rarely wears her heart on her sleeves—it's one of the things they had in common. She searched her brain for something that could lift her spirits up.

"Hey," Santana brought her finger to her friend's chin, lifting her gaze to meet her genuinely sympathetic brown eyes.

"You, my dear," Santana started. "Are the most Asian girl I ever know."

Quinn chuckled lightly.

But Santana nodded, as if she's letting her take the information in and like she really meant it.

"You love Chinese food, you're in love with an Asian guy, your skin is so pale and yellow like you've been puking your guts out," she listed out, undeterred. "Seriously, if I didn't know your parents, I'd call you Blonde Kung Fu. Honestly, I still think you're adopted, so you might want to look into that. Who knows, maybe you really are Chinese," Santana shrugged, giving her a sympathetic smile.

Quinn smiled at her friend. Even when Santana is being genuinely comforting and nice, she still tends to be racist, inappropriate, and insulting. "Thank you," the blonde said sincerely.

Santana merely sighed dramatically and shook her head from side to side. "Being nice is hard work," she commented, earning a first real laugh from her friend. Her phone suddenly vibrated. "Ooh, speaking of the devil!" Santana grinned mischievously towards the blonde, showing her the name 'Jet Lee' on the screen.

"Hey, Mike. Quinn and I are just talking about you."

The blonde's eyes widened, horrified, mouthing 'don't you dare' to her best friend. But Santana merely turned her back on her.

"Mhm… mhm… Really? Meh, whatever. I don't have anything better to do, anyway. Mhm… mhm… mhm…" Santana spoke nonchalantly to her phone as she examined her nails again. "Alright, bye—or in your language, sayonara."

Quinn eyed her friend quizzically, saying "He's not Japanese, you know" in passing, knowing the other girl would simply shrug it off. "So, what was that about?"

Santana merely resumed her comfortable position in the lounge chair, not even looking at Quinn. "I told you he's not into that girl 'China'."

"It's Tina. And how did you know?" Quinn asked feigning nonchalance but her whole face lights up nonetheless.

"Because," Santana deadpanned. "He just asked me out."

Quinn's face dropped and she swears her heart stopped beating. That is, until she hears Santana's evil, so evil laugh.

"You… should… have seen… your face!" Santana breathed through her bouts of laughter as she clutched her stomach fiercely and threw her head back.

"I fucking hate you!" Quinn screamed in anger, her fists clenched tightly at her sides to prevent them from going for Santana's slim and fragile neck. It's really tempting, though. Like, really.

"Aww, come on, it's funny!" Santana grinned cheekily at the blonde. When she still didn't smile, Santana gave her the deets. "He knows this girl who he thinks I would like and asked me if he could set me up and I said okay."

Quinn was still staring daggers at her. "I hope she turns out to be a he."

Santana just laughed her friend's childishness off. "Oh, come on. You seriously didn't think I would go out with him, did you?"

Quinn only scoffed, still irritated with the Latina.

"Unless, of course, she is really a lesbian… Yep, Mike is too pretty for her own good."

Quinn let out a snort despite her resolve to give Santana a hard time in earning her forgiveness. I mean, let's face it, Santana doesn't really know the word 'sorry' and Quinn is still pretending she doesn't have the hots for Mike.

And just like that, all is forgiven.

xox


A/N #2: I hope you all like this chapter, even if there's no Brittana here yet. Next chapter: the date.

A friendly reminder:

Reviews make a happy author. A happy author makes updates. Updates make a happy reader. A happy reader makes reviews. And the cycle continues. What I want to say is, I hope you are all happy with this chapter. :)