Jane Shepard POV
Standing there staring at the beams, a thousand thoughts running through my mind with one major theme, I'm not ready to be done. I've only just gotten Thane back from the brink of death. I've only started to live. The words of Mordin rang through like a clear bell...It had to be me, someone else might of got it wrong. So, it had to be me.
I'm Commander Shepherd. This was where my story would end so that millions of stories could continue. So that Thane's story could go on. So that every story that belonged to my team, my friends, my family all would continue. No matter how I wished this could be different it had to be like this.
Pain seared through me, I could feel myself slowly fading, even as the numerous cybernetics fought valiantly to repair the massive damage. Blood, warm and thick dripped down my arm as I held the wound on my side. I stared at the beams, trying to decide... But, all at once it became clear. No one should ever go through this again so destroying technology was out. Besides that would mean certainly death of those close to me... Thane, Tali, EDI... Not just them though. The geth, the quarians, the volus, and every person living only because technology kept them alive, would end. So that wasn't a viable solution and not a permanent one. No one should ever control the reapers, not even me. So that was out too.
That left only one thing left... Synthesis. It would save everyone, and cost only one life, mine. I walked to the beam, pain searing with every step. I closed my eyes and I could almost feel his skin against my hand.
My heart pounded in my chest, my hand on his cheek. My forehead against his. The scent of his skin filled my lungs and seemed to swirl around me and fill me up, he gave me strength. He pulled back a little, his dark eyes meeting mine. My hands slid down his neck, his smooth, lithe muscles under my hands, as they moved to his arms. A soft smile crossed my lips as I looked at him, my destiny was there in his eyes in that moment."I Love you Thane Krios, don't you forget that" I ran my hands across his skin down his arms and pulled him close and pressed my lips to his, my head swimming, my heart aching in both joy and sadness.
I opened my eyes, standing at the beam, the edge at my feet. There was no way to know at that time, that would be one of the last times I'd see him. But if that was one of the last, Im glad it was a good memory for us to share. In that moment fear courses through me, my heart hammering away. What would happen now, what came next?
I turned to look at the catalyst. I opened my mouth but he cut me off. His distaste for organics showing in his harsh words.
"If you want this war to end, there is no way to guarantee you survive, it's the cost of what you want, no amount of begging will stop this"
His disgust clear as he spoke. I looked away for a moment shaking my head. For a moment he was confused.
"No, I hold very little regard for my life. It is those I care for that I was hoping to beg for. Thane, my crew... Their loved ones... Please, if you can, save them, spare them please. Take care of them if you can."
His face went blank... Trying to understand. But love was complex and hard for those who never felt it to understand. Love is why Legion was special, his love for me and the crew is why he gave his life. Nothing motivates like love. It's why I willingly give my life now, for love.
The catalyst, was silent and nodded staring out at the war torn Earth. For a split second it seemed like it finally understood, what I was doing, what had really happened and what he had done.
I closed my eyes and leaned backwards over the edge into the beam. Only memories of Thane to keep me company in my last moments, love was my greatest accomplishment.
Soon the background melted away. The bombs in the background, gone. The nervous energy, gone. Everyone but him, gone. He was my greatest regret, leaving him behind. I held him tight against me. It was our good bye before the push to the beam. He told me to come back in one piece, it was the only promise I knew somehow, I couldn't keep. I had only this memory left to keep with me so I wouldn't be alone in this time, as everything came to a close. I took one more look into his eyes, the love there was enough to last me wherever I was going next as even he faded away.
My eyes opened, a blurry green, above me. Confused I lifted my hands, pain flooded through me. I was alive, but how? I touched my side, the hole gone, healed. Things slowly came to focus. I slowly sat up, achey pain shooting through me. I looked down at the dead grass under me, how long had I been laying here? I scanned around me and seen a massive green covered mass relay glowing under all the green. It must of crashed into the planet at some point. But how did I get here?
A little green blinking light caught my eye on my Omni tool. I opened the message.
A holo of the catalyst appeared. "My calculations say a massive energy burst from your biotics would give you a 15 percent chance of survival. On the chance it worked, I programmed the citadel to push you through the prothean made gate here on the citadel to the prothean relay that we pushed into their planet, long ago." Shame washed over his face for a moment. "Hopefully it's not in an ocean. If anyone could care for your people it's you, not me. So I hope you get this, and good luck"
The prothean home world... I looked around seeing things a little more differently. I felt like an ant in a rainforest. I was alone and on a planet uninhabited and far away from those that mattered most. I sighed, and gathered myself together. I'd just beaten the odds, won the second chance lottery.
I climbed weakly to my feet, stiff from head to toe. I had to make it, I had to get off this planet and find Thane so I can tell him, I love him. I'd do anything to see him again. So I began walking. My footfalls were slow, by I was determined to keep moving forward.
The sun set after a few hours and the starlight filtered through the thick canopy. I'd turn on my omni light but I didn't want to make myself a target. I knew nothing about this place or it's predators. I stumbled over things I couldn't see. I tumbled down a steep decline. I landed at the bottom with a grunt as I layed splayed on my back. Instead of the canopy, I seen only stars glittering above me. I slowly sat up and peered over the grass, a beautiful meadow. I smiled to myself, it was stunning. What was better was the sound I heard...the soft trickling of water. I scrambled toward it and fell into the crystal clear water and laughed. The cold water felt amazing on my sore, achey body. I grabbed for my lower leg pocket that was thankfully intact. I pulled out my self filtering canteen. I filled it over and over, each time guzzling down the water. I didn't realize how thirsty I was until I had found the water.
Finding water was something good, because whatever was left of the prothean cities would be near water. So now I had a direction to go too. I climbed out of the river as my teeth began to chatter. I stripped down pulling the rest of my small survival kit from my lower leg pocket. I pulled out a small pocket laser. I dug into the sand and put sticks and grasses into the hole then aimed the laser into the piles center. It was great for cutting things my omni blade couldn't cut, but also made a stellar fire starter. The flames crackled as I blew on the smoking pile. I smiled sitting close, letting the fire warm me and slowly dry my clothes. My stomach churned as it threatened to repel the contents from it. I choked back the urge to puke an laid back in the grass hoping that would settle my stomach. It did.
Staring at the stars I wondered where Thane was right now? Why here? Was this the only mass relay on a planet where I could survive? I suppose only time would tell.
I missed Thane but knowing he was probably out there, somewhere, made me happy. I would find him one day. After I find a working shuttle and get off this planet, find the nearest comm buoy and contact home. There are a lot of steps in that plan but, it's better than no plan.
I drifted off to sleep and dreamed of him. I could feel him in my dreams, it felt so real. When my eyes fluttered open to the bright sunlight overhead, I frowned wishing my dreams were reality. I got to my feet. I checked my clothes, they were dry enough. I slipped my clothes on and buckled up the few pads that still had straps. I'd pulled off all the bits of melted metal, what was left of my armor last night. Id miss that set, customized for me in royal blue that had a deep purple camo gleam to it. It took a full on reaper laser and I was still walking. That's the true test of armor right there.
I filled my canteen once more and started walking. For a couple weeks all I did was walk, study the plants with my Omni tool to see which ones were safe enough to consume, for the most part I stopped only to sleep and hunt. I followed miles upon miles of river, most days my stomach were fine but I was sure that it only got upset because of the new foods.
I could feel the pain slowly die away with each day I kept moving. I almost felt back to normal. Soon cramping took over for the nausea. The good news was I was gaining weight so despite the drawbacks of the food, I was digesting it and flourishing health wise.
At dusk of the 26th day, I seen it the outline of a broken city just one more days walk. The next day was exciting, knowing I'd be the first to set foot in the city in over 50,000 years. It was amazing anything was still standing.
That first feel of pavement beneath my boots set a thrill through my blood. I jogged down the street, in awe of how intact everything was. Looking at how little foliage was growing through made me suspect the crash off the mass effect gate into the planet must of knocked it off its rotation and by the look of how wet even the streets were still that it was likely frozen for a good portion of that 50 thousand years. Otherwise things would be a lot worse for wear.
I spotted a building that looked almost completely intact except for a tree buckling part of a wall and a broken window. I headed for the front door, locked. Then I remembered the tree! I jogged around the building and climbed over the buckled wall, careful of the thick black plate glass. I picked up a piece and noticed it wasn't black, it was solar panels. I got very excited at this point. From what I could understand of the symbols outside... This should be an apartment building. If it had power that meant, hot water!
Inside everything was very cut and dry. Then again from what Liara had told me, from her exploration of the broken ruins she'd been through they were a no frills group with no real comforts. I tried opening the apartment door but there were no buttons. I managed to hack the access panel though. I wandered down the halls until I seen one door that stood out compared to the rest. It had a mural painted on it. I touched the painting and the door slid right open. Inside there were lifelike murals on the walls, this must of been what it looked like... Before.
I stared at each one before looking in a room with a table and 2 chairs. Two bodies were in the chairs, holding hands. My heart was heavy at the sight. They must have gone out before the end, on their own terms. The same thing had happened on Earth. I sighed and went to what looked like a dispenser of some kind. I touched it and a selection panel popped up with pictures of food dishes in it.
I selected one that looked good and hoped that, like the rest of their tech, held the test of time. After 15 minutes a piping hot dish of... I'm not sure what, was produced in the tray. I was just happy for anything besides the furry birds Id been catching and eating.
It tastes like beef from Earth but sweet and spicy. I sighed, my stomach content with a full meal. I peeked around a bit more and found a shower and sure enough... Hot water. I took the longest shower ever. Lastly I looked for a bed, I found a panel in an empty room and sure enough, a bed folded out from the wall. I flopped onto it and smiled glad to have a spot to relax.
I dozed off thinking about, Thane and how happy we would be to see one another again. For the first time in weeks, I could relax.
