[A/N: so the first two chapters are more like prologue, and at the end of this chapter their perspectives sync up :) the italicized paragraphs in both chapters are flashbacks if it wasn't clear :P I'm not entirely sure which direction this is going, but there will probably be some drama down the line here shortly]
CRAIG:
I never thought I could ever be friends with the twitchy little spaz kid in the back corner. I guess I have those assholes to thank, for helping me find one person I actually care about.
Tweek's not a bad guy, he's just fucked up.
Like me.
That first night we ever spent together in the hospital, I listened to him sink into frantic despair for hours…
I finally sat up.
"Tweek." I say softly.
"GAH! Oh Jesus I'm sorry! I didn't mean to wake you up!" he spasms, smothering himself in his bedding.
[Wake me? Like I could fall asleep with all your whimpering in the first place.]
I sigh, swinging my legs over the side of my bed. He's shaking so hard the bed frame is rattling.
I lift the covers off him.
"GAH!" he shouts again, eyes wide in shock. He flinches curling into himself, anticipating a blow. I sigh again, climbing in beside him, wrapping both of us in the covers and pulling him to my chest. He stops shaking and tilts his head up, fixing me with those huge coffee and cream eyes.
"C-Craig?! What're you doing?!"
I flip him off with my free hand and sigh.
"Just shut up and go to sleep."
He fidgets, whimpering a few "gah's".
"Shhh," I whisper, his wild hair tickling my chin. "It's okay, just go to sleep Tweek. You're okay, just sleep."
He twitches a few more times and then is still, his breathing slow and deep. I sigh again.
[Finally.]
I'm still not sure how I knew that would work. I guess he just kind of reminded me of Stripe, when he's all shaky and panicked, and I just couldn't help but want to comfort him.
Every weekend.
I found myself looking forward to subduing his trembling and feeling him relax against me. I can't explain it, just something so fucking satisfying about being the only one to be able to do that for him.
We're in my room tonight; he's sitting on the floor next to me, watching me play my new assassins creed.
Suddenly he gets up, nearly yanking my controller out of the port as he trips over the wire.
"Hey, careful." I frown looking up at him.
His expression freezes my insides. All of the color is drained from his slender features, which is saying something, since he barely has any color to begin with. His eyes are blank and unfocused, as if he can't remember who I am. He tears his gaze away as if burned, and lurches toward my bedroom door.
"I'm-gotta bathhhhroom… nee-eed co-ffee…" he slurs out through clenched, chattering teeth.
He fumbles, trying to find the doorknob. I'm on my feet now, striding towards him.
"Dude, what's wrong?" I say, knowing he must be having another panic attack. He doesn't reply, still fumbling clumsily for the doorknob, his breathing erratic and forced. Fuck I hate when this happens, it always tears me apart seeing him like this. Jesus, he's so out of it he's still looking for the doorknob.
On the wrong side of the door. Grinding his teeth together so hard I can hear them creaking.
"Fuck dude." I say my heart climbing into my throat, as I encircle him in my arms.
"Tweek." I breathe in his ear.
He takes a huge shuddering breath and makes a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sob, then starts sobbing in earnest.
Tears sting my eyes as I twist him around burying my face into his hair.
"Tweek…" I hear my voice crack.
"Cra-aig?" he chokes out between sobs.
I pull back holding him at arm's length, studying his face.
He's staring at me, wild eyed, with those huge anxious eyes of his. I swallow around the heart in my throat, entranced in his deep gaze. It's like I can hear him. Worrying about me.
"Why does Craig look so upset? Is it my fault? Oh Jesus I made Craig cry! I'm so sorry Craig! I didn't mean to!"
Something like that is probably what's going on in the ridiculous head of his. His lips are trembling, and he looks on the verge of breaking down again. My heart throbs painfully in my throat.
Jesus, Tweek…
I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding, and lean in pressing my lips against his, wanting more than anything to stop them from trembling.
Oh, wow…
I tug him closer, abruptly needing much more than to just stop his shaking. His breath hitches, and he melts into me, arms hesitantly wrapping around my neck.
Tweek…
I break apart adjusting my head before meeting his lips again, pushing further. A small sound escapes him and he clutches at my shirt, clinging closer. I slip my tongue easily past his lips, probing, coaxing him to do the same. He obliges timidly, and I push him against the door, losing myself in his warmth and the growing heat of my lips sliding against his, pumping up my heart rate with each twist and pop.
We finally break apart panting, tangled in each other's arms, his fingers knotted deftly in my hair. I push my forehead against his grinning.
He's adorable. Face flushed, flustered, beaming dazedly back up at me between pants.
It's like floodgates had opened. All I want is to touch him, bury my face in his erratic, unkempt hair, taste his coffee stained lips, feel the warmth emanating from his shaky little coffee stunted form. I smother him in my arms.
"Tweek," I murmur nuzzling into the crook of his neck, gathering him closer and closer, as close as possible into my arms, as he lets out shaky little gasps and sighs, fingers dragging deliciously through my hair, over my shoulders, along my spine…
"Tweek I love you. I swear, I'll never leave you to hurt alone. I l-love you…" I gasp before my brain can process this new revelation. I swallow nervously, realizing what I had just said.
Tweek is dead still in my arms, and I'm afraid to meet his eyes. I open my mouth trying to say something, anything, to remedy this awkward silence. Nothing comes. I close it, clearing my throat instead. At the same time, Tweek takes a shuddering breath.
Shit.
I pull back to study his face. Eyes shut tight, tears flowing down his cheeks
"Tweek, I'm so sorr-"
"I love you too Craig!" he wails, burying his face in my chest.
I stand dumbstruck for a moment.
He's crying because, he loves me too…?
I laugh softly, stroking his tangled hair tenderly. That does seem like a very Tweek thing to do. I grin.
How long has he loved me?
The question flashes through my mind, immediately followed by
How long have I loved him?
My chest swells in response. A while apparently. I smile softly, gently tugging Tweek loose and pulling him into another kiss.
I cradle his face between my hands. He gazes at me, tears trapped in his long eyelashes making his already shining eyes sparkle dazzlingly. I can't help staring and he blushes.
"Ngh! Wh-why are you looking at me like that?" he whines bashfully.
I flash him a grin.
"Because I love you." I state, kissing the tip of his nose. I can't get enough of saying it, it feels… so right.
His eyes widen and his blush darkens as he fidgets, agitated. I chuckle and bend down to scoop his knees out from under him. He shrieks, clutching frantically at anything he can grab hold of.
"I think it's time for bed." I say teasingly, sweeping him towards my bed and plopping him down on his back, before climbing over him, pinning him underneath me and smirking down at him. He gapes up at me mouth hanging open in shock, his face so red I worry for a second I might give the poor spaz a heart attack.
"Craig," he sighs breathlessly, giving me the heart attack. I swallow dryly, rolling off him and flopping down beside him.
"Your face is all red," he says shifting sideways to face me.
"Oh," I mumble, still trying to calm my galloping heart. "…So is yours,"
"My face always d-does that," he quips. "But I've never seen you make so many faces in the entire seven years I've k-known you." I can feel his eyes on the side of my face, scrutinizing me. I turn to the side facing him as well.
"It's cause I just realized I love you." I say it again, gazing deep into his eyes. He stares back chewing on his lip mindlessly.
"Really?" he asks meekly.
"No, not really, I just put my tongue in your mouth and told you I loved you, because I don't really love you." I roll my eyes at him. "Of course fucking really." I finish, pulling him into me. He's gnawing on his lip now.
"Well, i-it's just that I've… I've loved you for a long time. Ngh! A-and I just d-didn't think you would ever… could ever f-feel that way ab-bout me." He admits to my chest. I tilt his chin up so he's looking at me instead of my sternum, and peck him lightly on the lips.
"Tweek, why would you think I couldn't love you," I say softly. "Even before I wanted to suck on your tongue and undress you, I still loved you as a friend. Hell, I thought that's all it was for the longest time… I guess I never thought about what it would be like to be more," I brush a strand of hair off his forehead as he gapes at me with saucer eyes, cheeks blazing red.
"What?" I wonder aloud.
"Y-y-you wanna… oh JESUS CHRIST!" he stammers, burying his face in my shoulder. I smirk, realizing my bluntness, and trace my fingers lightly down his spine. He shudders and squeaks in surprise as I slip my fingers underneath the hem of his shirt. Shifting him comfortably against me, I draw invisible shapes absentmindedly on his soft skin, all the while pondering when exactly I fell in love with Tweek Tweak.
He's soon asleep, looking the most peaceful I'd ever seen him. I smile, and run my fingers through his hair. He murmurs in his sleep, nuzzling into me oh-so endearingly. My chest does that swelling thing again, flipping my stomach upside down, and I heave to catch my breath as my heart pounds in my ears.
I can't be sure when it happened, but oh man have I got it bad.
