Gollum: Well peopleses, welcomeses to the secondses chapters of the Enterses Apocol-

Gollum's head explodes in a horrific shower of blood as Jack strides on set, holding a smoking Longshot 3000

Jack: Sorry 'bout that folks, everything's okay around here, nothing to see here, move along.

ThePyro: Judging by the way his head came off, I would say there's quite a bit to see.

Jack: you wanna end up like him? draws an AR2 rifle from nowhere and points it at the author

ThePyro: I would ask the same question. However, I AM THE ALMIGHTY AUTHOR! NONE MAY DEFEAT ME! I AM ALL POWERFUL! I CAN CREATE AND DESTROY WORLDS IN A MATTER OF A FEW KEYSTROKES! I SHALL-

Jack: throws a stapler and knocks ThePyro out All right, I have no idea how that worked,
nor how I got that stapler...

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The Bathysphere Plunged into the icy depths forcefully, as if Chuck Norris himself kicked it into the sea with all his Chuckish might.

"wow, it's pretty deep..."

The other hooded guy turned to face Jack in his seat.

"yeah, I guess this Thing must be pretty strong to withstand this pressure."

the hooded figure shuffled a little in his seat.

"Yeah. Why exactly is this thing here. I mean like, who in the world goes out of their way to build a weird submarine in the middle of nowhere inside a lighthouse? More to the point, why the hell did we get in?"

The guy wearing the hood reached up to his hood.

"Why would we just get in? I mean like, there's no real reason other than pure stupidity on our behalf, it's not like we were brainwashed into doing something, that would be stupid, and how come-"

Gordon Freeman lowered the hood and stretched his arms lazily.

"GORDON FREEMAN?"

Gordon merely smiled and polished his crowbar with a shred of the seat he ripped off.

"Why are you here? More to the point, did you just use revealing your identity to avoid me picking holes in the plot like why yo-"

Suddenly, Neo seemingly phase shifted into existance beside Jack cutting his sentence short, holding a strange machination.

"What in all that is purple is that?" Jack said.

Neo simply replied, "Ooga woogla nerfurgager." Suddenly, the unusual metallic object in his hand unfolded, whirring and clicking like a manhack.

"IT'S A BOMB!!!" Jack roared, before trying to open the Bathysphere door.

"No. I Am The One. It Is A Plot Device." Neo stated with dramatic apathy, speaking each word with an upper case letter.

"You can't do that! It's...it's... just not... grammatical!" To which Neo replied,
"Yes I Can. I Am The One." The strange object, now identified as a Plot Device, radiated a pure blue glow and seemed to supernova in Neo's palm.

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"What just happened? I remember trying to speak about plot holes, then everything went blue..." Jack mumbled, rising from his coma-like stupor.

"Hmm... must've docked automatically while we were out. Nice piece of it, this." Jack stated, patting the metal interior of the Bathysphere.

Jack scanned the small space like a blind hawk and sighted a person curled into the corner between the lever and the seats.

Gordon Freeman was simply lying on the floor, shaking nervously with his arms hugging his knees into his chest.

Jack looked at Gordon and spoke up,"Dude, what's wrong?"

Gordon slowly swiveled his whole body, somehow pivoting on an invisible axis whilst sitting [Just try it yourself...

Jack almost shed a tear, skaing in shock.

"He...he...h-he did w-what?"

Gordon just stood up shakily, and looked out the window of the Bathysphere, pointing at a lone figure, shadowed by the light filtering through the watery depths outside the docks.

"I need...yes..we needs monies...monies for him...the Human Paladin must reach level 50 before Tuesday..."

"What was that?" Jack piped up.

They both peered out through the steamed up glass of the Bathysphere, focusing on a distant figure.

"Yessssss...my precioussssss epiccccssssss..." The strange, hunched over silhouette muttered.

"What is that?" Jack inquired to noone in particular.

Gordon turned to face Jack and made a few varied waves and shrugs.

"Warcraft Splicer?"

Yes, I Apologise for the Chapter length so far, but the Intro/Bathysphere sequence is far too restricting, yet I feel that I will rush it horribly and then we might need to call in Neo to wipe their minds again. Im making a vow to make nearly every chapter at least 100-150 words longer than its predecessor. Sorry, but i'm just not a real marathon style typist, i'm more suited to saying "Hlp medc" or "bloody camper n00b" over Team Fortress and the like. Next chapter will only come when I get ONE review. Not very demanding, I just feel a little like a train without tracks, I really don't have a clue if people are actually liking this, or are people just going, "Meh. Useless. Back Button." Open to comments of any kind, be it criticizing, thanks, flaming, or appraisal. Even flames have some kind of basis on what's wrong. Call what you want parodied, any characters, or just an idea you want to see. Hell, even leave a few random words at the bottom of the review if you do type one. Maybe the random words could be the hidden inspiration i'm searching for. Sincere thanks to the 10 people who actually spared a short glance at my work, they're the people who are keeping my fingers moving.

P.S. CRITICIZE GRAMMAR! POINT OUT FLAWS WHEN POSSIBLE PLEASE!

Thanks for reading, Hope you enjoyed it so far and what's to come.
ThePyro