What happened? Where am I? There was nothing but darkness around me, endlessly sucking me in as I drifted further and further away. From where? From who? I'm not sure. Let's see, what was I doing last time? I was giving a speech….

That's it! The speech!

I remember now!

A man from one of the supremacy groups managed to sneak in and assassinate me!

That means…

I really am dead.

If I had a body right now, I would be crying.

I wish I..

I wish I had another chance.

I failed everyone.

I'll never see my loved ones again.

I never got to tell Nicolas..

That I was..

That we were…

A bright light interrupted my plight. And soon, everything around me was white and blinding. The air, brittle and cold, was icing my frail skin. Skin? I felt myself touching a surface. Yes, skin indeed. My vision went from an absence of light, to a messy blur. I might not be able to see clearly, but at least I was seeing something.

I heard a flurry of voices. I could barely make out what they were saying.

"Someone get the…"

"I need a… over here!"

I could feel the air around me shift as a cause of their flittering. I tried to move my body to see if I could figure out where I was, but I noticed something strange. My arms were short. Like really short, and my legs seemed to share the same fate. Am I in a new body? Reincarnation? That can't be..

A pair of giant arms corrected that thought as it picked me up. It turned out to be a woman, I figured, as she held me close to her chest.

"Aww," she cooed. "Don't you want to say hi to your new daughter?" I guess she was talking to my mother.

"No," A cold voice spat out, "Get that thing away from me!" Well, I could tell that I was born a wanted child. Yeesh.

I felt the arms holding me droop slightly. At least this lady cared. A thought flashed through my head.

If I had a body right now, I would be crying.

And so, as a way to express my sorrow and to get back at my so-called mother to a lesser extent. I started to wail.

The body holding me tensed. "See madam? You're hurting her feelings."

I heard a low growl coming from the left of me. "I don't care, now get that child out of here!"

The breath from the woman's sigh brushed against my forehead and I was swiftly taken away from my mother.

I was placed in a crib in a room where the walls were green? At least, I think it's green. My vision is still blurry.

A warm hand caressed my cheek. "Don't worry," she whispered affectionately. "She'll come around, I'm sure of it."

Umm, no. I doubt it. I've heard of post-partum depression, but I think this is something beyond that. That women hates me. Hopefully, I won't have to interact with her much. I'm not in the mood to live through an abusive childhood.

And on the topic of parenting, where was my father? Is that why I was welcomed with such disdain in this world? Was I the product of a one-night stand? Or an unrequited love, perhaps? Maybe even a…

No, let's not go there.

If I was so unwanted, then why not abort me? Is the technology and laws of where I was born strict and outdated? Was I born in a third-world country? Or a fascist regime? I hate being left in the dark like this! But the only thing I can do is wait and observe my surroundings to the best of my abilities.

How much time has passed since I died? Hopefully not too much, because then, maybe I can find Nicolas and the others and…

And what?

Walk up to them out of the blue and say, "Hey! You remember that chick you loved that was killed? Well guess what? I'm her!" Not only would they look at me like I was crazy, but they would also see me as a disgusting imposter trying to emotionally manipulate them for fame or supernatural powers like those women who claim to be the reincarnation of Anne Frank.

How about just meeting them "coincidentally" and start a natural relationship with them?

But that's too painful for me. I don't think I could handle pretending everything is normal and fine when it's not. I'd be too busy mourning what it once was and try to recreate some fucked-up version of our past relationship.

Then…should I just let them go?

A pang struck my chest.

I-

The door struck open before I could finish my thoughts. "Time for your feeding!" She sing-songs while holding up a bottle.

It was that lady again, I'm guessing she is my official nanny or the mid-wife who is temporarily taking care of me until further notice.

Hmm, that's strange. I wonder why my mother decided to give birth in the house instead of going to a hospital? You would think someone who was giving birth to an unwanted child would do it in the hospital full of drugs to dull the pain and get it over with, but she didn't. Is this just the custom of the country I am in? I figured I was born in Germany with all the German being spoken about. In my old life, I spoke up to five languages to prepare for my long-standing goal of being president. It's a good thing this skill can aid me somewhat in this new life.

But that makes this even more confusing. Germany was considered a progressive country when it came to reproductive rights and birth control, so why didn't she abort me? And furthermore, their hospitals are far from being dangerous to check into.

I didn't get my answer until months later when the nanny, whose named I learned was Annika, decided to take me for a stroll for the first time in my new life.

After being cooped up for so long with nothing to do besides eat, sleep, and use the bathroom, a rush of excitement and wonder shot through my body. I wonder what the world outside is for all this time, I wonder what technology has improved since my untimely departure, I wonder what the current world events are as of now, and I wonder what the state of my country is after I left.

I might not get all the answers, but I should be able to gather something from all of the conversations around me.

We exited through the door and I saw a carriage waiting for me. A carriage? Isn't that a bit old fashioned? I took a look at my surroundings, we were on a farm. Oh, that explains it I guess. Maybe they just wanted to take the horses out for a spin. It could also explain why I was born in the house. It must have been too far to go to a hospital.

But something is off, I can feel it. I survey the area and realized something. No, I must be off. It can't be.

But the dread in my stomach settled in as we passed by more and more carriages. I understand that I'm in a rural area, but shouldn't there be at least a smidgen of modern technology? No phones, no tractors, no anything?

Was I born in an Amish community? It could explain why my mother hated me, maybe I was born out of an unwanted polygamous marriage? But wait, Amish communities haven't existed in Europe for ages.

Then, that meant that I was reincarnated to the past!

My blood froze. The past? This is literally the worst discovery I have ever came across! I can't live in the past! I'm used to technology and luxurious and convenient foods at my disposal. Now the only thing I'll be able to eat is unsalted rotten food. I won't be able to enjoy the past time of movies or using a computer. I could get sick and die at the simplicity of a splinter. Oh god, what if I was born in the age of the bubonic plaque!?

Annika must have noticed that I was upset. She cradled me and her arms and rocked me for a bit. "Now, now," she comforted, "There is nothing scary about a carriage ride, we're almost into town. Isn't this exciting?"

No, this isn't exciting! This is a nightmare!

My infant body couldn't handle this much stress and I started to cry again.

"Aww," Annika cooed, "It's alright darling." But her assurances just made me cry harder.

I just, I just can't take it anymore! I'll never see Nicolas and other loved ones again, I'll never be the leader that I worked so hard for. I bet back at home, I'll just be remembered as the president that was assassinated on her first term, along with the other rejects. I can't even grow up in the comforts of a time period I'm used to.

It hasn't even been a year yet and I already want to give up on life. I feel so lost and broken, and the tears that fall on my cheeks can't even begin to adequately express the inner turmoil I'm suffering through.

"Look! We're into town!" Annika pulled me up so I could see it. The buildings looked oddly familiar, with the orange-tan tiles sitting on top of the white buildings. Where could I have seen it before?

I was still crying when we pulled up to the town to get out, and my wails were attracting attention of the folks around us.

Their reactions were what you expected of a baby crying in public, some disgruntled muttering under their breath, others basking in nostalgia of when their children were babies, and the absolute adoration that usually befall on those of the child-loving persuasion.

"Busy day huh, Annika." An older man wearing tan pants with a brown vest walked towards us.

Annika breamed. "Oh, you know how it is, Jim. It's her first time out and she's a little nervous." I shifted a little as I felt his gaze on me.

"Well, she certainly is too pretty to be crying this much." I could feel the warmth from his smile.

Annika giggled. "Yeah, she really is beautiful. She'll grow up to be a stunner."

"What's her name?" I quieted down my wails a little. I never knew what my name was in this life. I never really cared that much as I had my own, but I was a little curious.

She smiled down with adoration in her eyes. "Her name is Historia."

My wails were silenced instantly.

What?

That can't be, it's just a coincidence.

"What's wrong?" Annika tensed up at my sudden silence. Jim leaned in a little to see if he could figure it out.

I ignored them as I heard another conversation passing by.

"Yeah, so she went to Wall Rose to see if they were selling the product there."

"That's ridiculous, if it isn't here then why would it be there?"

No

A group of children were running past us playing a game.

"Rawr! You better run, I'm gonna eat you!" A boy in a white blouse stomped.

"Aaaah!" The other children screamed and giggled. "It's a Titan!"

No

Two men in a familiar uniform walked by us.

"I can't believe that crazy bastard joined the Scouting Legion!"

"I know, he got a death wish or something?"

I felt cold and clammy. Annika was starting to panic.

"I think she's sick. Look how pale she has gotten." Jim grunted in agreement.

"You go on ahead back, I'll send a doctor on over." Annika nodded in thanks and took us back on the carriage.

It was deathly silent, the ride back. Annika was too worried about me to do anything. Her fretting kept her frozen and stiff.

As for me, I felt like my life was over even before it begun.

If I thought simply living in the past was a nightmare…

Then this was unadulterated hell.