I couldn't answer. My voice was there somewhere, but I couldn't find it. All I could do was think of how much trouble I was in.

"Put it down. Now." Darry's voice was calm, angry.

My whole body started to shake, but I managed to do as I was told setting the gun down on the coffee table.

"I want an explanation Ponyboy ... what on earth do you think you're doing messing around with a gun? Huh?!"

Hearing Darry's angry voice made Steve and Soda come out from the kitchen as Two-Bit stirred from his position on the couch. Johnny looked terrified - like he wanted to run, while Dally just stood there watching the latest Curtis family drama unfold like it was nothing. I was speechless. I mean what could I say? I had just been caught doing something Darry's warned me about a million times.

"I asked you a question Ponyboy Curtis!" my brother was bellowing now.

Why couldn't I just answer him? I was frozen ... scared.

"Easy Dar, he didn't mean to do nothing bad ... he just ..." Soda had started to defend me as usual, but Darry cut him off.

"You shut up and stay out of this Sodapop. I'm sick and tired of you sticking up for him when he does something stupid and reckless!"

"Why are you hollering at Soda?" Steve jumped in. "He didn't even touch the stupid thing! All he did was tell Winston to put it away!"

And that's when Darry whirled around. His icy, cold stare now directed toward Dallas. "It's yours? You brought a gun into my house?!"

Dally returned the glare and shrugged. "Yeah, it's mine. Relax man ... the kid was just holding it."

Before he could say another word Darry was on him. He grabbed Dallas by the collar with his left hand and slammed his fist hard into Dally's face with his right. Then he hit him again. Dally lost his balance and fell against the wall, blood gushing from his nose. My stomach dropped. I'd seen Darry fight plenty of times, but I'd never seen him hit a member of our gang that hard. I hoped I wasn't next.

"If you EVER bring a gun into this house again Dallas Winston so help me I will fucking END you! Do you hear me?! Darry yelled.

I saw the anger flash in Dally's eyes and I knew he was about to lose it on my brother. Then Darry added one more comment ... one that stopped Dally right there in his tracks.

"She'd be ashamed of you."

That hurt him worse than the broken nose. I could tell. He held Darry's icy stare for a second or two then dropped his gaze to the side, shaking his head slightly. He said nothing. Darry is the unspoken leader of our gang and even Dallas Winston knows how to honor something like that. Dally wiped his bloody nose on his sleeve and stood up. Then everyone's eyes turned to me...including Darry's. I wanted to disappear. Instead I hung my head and looked at the floor. I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I bit my bottom lip nervously.

"Go to your room Ponyboy."

I didn't move. Couldn't move.

"I know you heard me Pony..." his volume increasing. "What do you want? You want me to humble you right here with everyone watching?"

"No, Darry ..." My voice was barely a whisper.

"Then you've got 3 seconds to do as you're told..."

I willed my feet to move, but they wouldn't. I was stuck, shaking, and scared of my big brother.

True to his word Darry was next to me 3 seconds later. He grabbed me by my upper arm squeezing hard and spun me around landing a loud, heavy swat on my backside. Before I could get my hand back to protect myself from more he landed 3. They were harder than the first and I cried out. After 6 more I had tears streaming down my face. Darry's hands are big and he spanks hard. Even through my jeans I felt the sting, but mostly it was my pride that was hurting. I couldn't believe he was tanning me like a little kid in front of the gang. When he decided I'd had enough he turned me around to face him, his hands holding my shoulders. He bent down so he could look me in the eyes.

"If I EVER see something like that again Ponyboy Curtis you'll be getting my belt. Do I make myself clear?"

I sniffled, then answered "Yes, Darry."

"Good. Now, go to your room." He pointed down the hall.

This time I obeyed. I wasn't risking any more humiliation in front of the guys. I took a few steps then turned and looked over my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Darry." Even to my own ears my voice sounded small and young.

I turned back towards my room, but caught a glimpse of my brother's face before I walked away ... when he wasn't so angry he looked really young. Young and scared ... like me.