Ok! First story in the series!

Disclaimer: I don't won Loveless or any of the characters.

Rating: T

Song: "The Way She Feels" By Between the Trees

-X

"AH! Mom stop it!"

"What have you done with my Ritsuka?! Bring him back to me!"

"Mom I am Ritsuka! How many times do I have to tell you that?!"

"Shut up! You lie!"

Ritsuka then quickly threw his hands in front of his face to shield it from a large glass vase that was now hurdling towards him. He luckily was able to avoid it without injury and it simply fell to the ground and shattered into pieces. The distraught woman then finally collapsed to the ground in tears as she usually did after one of these all too regular fits; and as usual, Ritsuka took that as his cue to quietly slip away upstairs to his bedroom. Once he made it safely to his room, the small cat eared boy made sure to lock his door before walking solemnly to his bed. He sat down on the edge of the small twin bed with his head hung low and small tears streaming down his red cheeks.

"Why…why does this happen to me? All I do is hurt everyone around me…Mother, father and Seimei all hate me…Why? What have I done? What is wrong with me? I even hurt the people I care about…I always make Yuiko cry…and I always push Soubi away. Soubi…"

As he vented aloud to himself, all alone in his small room, he quickly found himself thinking only of the tall blonde. He then placed his small hands over his face and began sobbing uncontrollably as he thought of all the times he had caused Soubi pain; all the times that he had yelled at him, all the times he shoved him away, all the times he had gotten hurt because of him. All of these thoughts consumed him and he felt nothing but agony. He wished so desperately for some sort of relief from this pain.

He then slowly lifted his head from his hands, wiping away angry tears as he did, and stood from his bed to walk over to his large dresser. He opened up the top drawer to find dozens of scattered pictures of himself and Soubi. He had hoped that this would bring him relief but it only brought on more tears as he came to the realization that Soubi, being the way he was, would always come to his rescue, always come to protect him even if he would get hurt in the process. Ritsuka then let out a staggered sigh through his sobs and pushed all the pictures aside until he found the small pocket knife that lay at the very bottom of his drawer.

"S-Soubi…you would be better off if you had never met me…everyone would…."

He then gently gripped the small knife and flipped it open. Then with shaky hands and eyes full of tears, he pressed it firmly to the soft skin of his left wrist and slowly but gently dragged it across the skin.

"Ah…"

Ritsuka was a little surprised by the amount of blood dripping from the somewhat shallow cut he had just made but was more surprised at how little it had hurt.

"M-maybe it really is better this way…"

Ritsuka, now full of despair, again placed the knife against his wrist in the spot just above the first cut and this time pressed down much harder as he pulled it along.

"AH!"

This time Ritsuka bit down on his lip at the pain as the knife cut deep and the blood quickly began flowing and trickling down his arm and down to stain the floor in a steady flow. He then began crying hysterically as he finally made up his mind to end the suffering, not only his own but the suffering that he caused to everyone around him. He shifted the knife from one shaky hand to the other and swiftly made another deep cut through the veins on his other wrist before letting the knife slide out of his hands and onto the floor.

"Mother…You won't ever have to see this Ritsuka ever again, I hope that you can finally find closure in this….Yuiko, I won't ever make you cry ever again…"

Ritsuka then collapsed to the floor, the entire room seemed to be spinning and his vision was beginning to blur and get darker. He soon curled up as best he could in attempt to feel comfort one last time despite the fact that he was now laying in an ever growing pool of crimson. He then tried desperately to get out all of his apologies and farewells before everything went completely black.

"S-Soubi…I…I'm sorry I never told you…j-just how much I…l-love you…."

Ritsuka could then feel that it was getting harder and harder and to keep his eyes open and he felt his whole body growing cold. Even though he had hoped for so much more from his life, he took some kind of happiness in the fact that no one would have to suffer on his account any longer. He then closed his eyes and accepted his decision and prepared to embrace the looming darkness.

Out of the cold darkness, Ritsuka suddenly felt a familiar warmth that caused him to slowly open his eyes. When he did however, he was surprised to see that the warmth was not coming from the relief of death but from two strong arms being tightly wrapped around him.

"S-Soubi…?"

"Ritsuka….Why?!"

The boy then gathered the last of his strength to look up at the blonde whose eyes were full of tears, with tear filled eyes of his own.

"I…I don't want to make any one s-suffer anymore…"

"Ritsuka…how can you think that you make anyone suffer? This…." Soubi then gently placed a large hand over Ritsuka's bleeding wrist and began to cry more deeply. "This makes me hurt Ritsuka…this will hurt Yuiko and Yayoi and everyone else that loves you. Ritsuka…you are so special to so many people, you are so special to me…how can you not see that?"

"S-Soubi….I…I'm s-sorry…."

"Shhh Ritsuka…I will absolutely not let you slip away…I will not let you die here."

Soubi then quickly ripped off several pieces of his baby blue shirt and tied them tightly around the cuts on Ritsuka's wrist to try and stop the bleeding. He then pulled the small boy into his lap and lifted his delicate limp arms and placed them so that they were resting high on his shoulders.

"We need to keep your wrists above your heart to stop the bleeding. Please hold on Ritsuka….please…"

This whole time Ritsuka had never taken his eyes off of Soubi's and now as he lay in their in the blondes lap he finally realized that this was what love really was. As he looked up into Soubi's crying eyes, for the first time in his life he felt like someone needed him and he now saw his life as something meaningful through Soubi's eyes. He wanted to live…for himself, for his friends….for Soubi.

"S-Soubi…I promise…I won't go anywhere….I…I love you Soubi"