Thanks for the reviews, if i get more, it means a free pair of ghd's or some pancakes.
Tbh I want the pancakes more. *Sigh, I really really do.
I dont own greys
The next morning began just as the other one prior. She would wake up first, go through her bout of morning sickness then hear Derek turn on the kettle and fix her some tea as she showered. Then, as if practiced, he would leave her and shower himself making their total conversation time with each other a good seven and a half minutes, excluding work, sessions and the evenings; although she was sometimes already fast asleep when he came in.
"So I have a scan later today."
He put down his cup of coffee "Ok. What time do you want me to be there?"
"Well the appointment's at three."
"I'll meet you 2:50."
"Great."
He sipped at his coffee once more then put the cup down "Are we going to learn the baby's sex? Or is that a surprise?"
She shrugged "How do you feel on the situation?"
"I guess maybe not now, when we're more eager."
"Explain."
He looked her square in the eye "It just doesn't bother me right now."
"Ok" she brushed her skirt down "I'll see you at work, don't forget your appointment later today."
"Are we still meeting for lunch?"
She shook her head "No, my only time slot is the scan, then after its just patients and surgeries."
"Want me to buy you anything cravewise?"
She shook her head once more "If it comes up I'll page you"
"Good, I'll see you at work, good luck on the surgeries."
"You too." she said before she closed the trailer door shut.
XXXXXXX
"I don't even see her naked any more" Derek shifted in the chair "Its like we're two people having a baby who live in a trailer and that's it. I mean we don't even argue that much."
"Isn't that what was part of the problem? The arguing?"
"Yes, but it meant we were fighting, we were actually being ourselves, now its just like she lets things slide."
"Slide? How do you mean?"
He sighed "Well this morning, she told me she had a scan I asked if we were going to learn the sex of the baby and she just wondered what I wanted to do."
"What did you want to do?"
"I said it didn't bother me that much, but we could wait till later, and she just sort of stood there and took it."
"Hmm." she wrote down something then looked back at Derek "Ok so you were saying you don't see her naked, I'm guessing you're sex life has been on the rocks lately?"
He snorted "Or non existent." he sat forward a little "She changes while I shower and is usually asleep when I get in."
"So you want to be more intimate with Addison?"
"Yes. No. Yes." he leaned back "I just wouldn't know how to go about it if I did."
"I see." she scribbled some more "Can I just quickly ask, how often do you both talk to each other?"
"Not long, couple of minutes in the morning, maybe we have a lunch together sometimes."
"Ok so wouldn't it be easier just to tell her these things? Sit her down or wake her up just to talk? From the way you put it the very little car journeys you both might take are silent, so why not utilise that time, seize it and make it yours."
"And say what?"
"Anything you like." she pushed her glasses further up the bridge of her nose "Tell her you miss hearing her voice sometimes, that you miss her and the closeness you once shared."
"So she could just look at me and just kinda say ok?"
"Hmm. Tell me Derek, do you feel as if you're…somewhat always being judged by Addison?"
"Well that's how its always been hasn't it?" he sighed "From the moment I met her it was non stop speculation, I guess I felt I deserved it because I was sleeping with her friend and then all of a sudden looking at her differently."
"Why did you start to look at her differently?"
He shrugged "I dunno I guess she just kinda got to me. I remember she used to be really funny, always making comments that she thought nobody heard until I started to listen, always tucking her hair behind her ear, or brushing it out of her face before I gave her an elastic band…I guess it got to her?"
"I guess, only Addison can tell you that if you really want to know. From what I can make of it Addison only does something drastic when some things not going to plan."
"So that's why she slept with Mark?"
"If you really want to see it that way then you can, but Addison was in a relationship at the time, and in speculating if you were the drastic good she ended three years and began to love you."
He stayed silent, looked out the window fleetingly then turned back "I was indifferent, I'll see it that way, makes it easier to deal with."
XXXXXX
"Hey, I got you something" he said announcing his presence as he moved closer to the gurney she was sitting on, the hallway somewhat empty as nurses moved in and out of rooms.
She looked at him as he handed her a meatball sub. Smiling gratefully she unwrapped, and tucked into it heartily "Thanks" she said muffled by the food in her mouth.
He nodded "How was your day?"
Swallowing she turned to him "Good thanks, my feet are killing me but I'm ok."
He looked down to see that she was wearing her crocs, her hand resting on her belly gently as she slowly devoured her sub.
"Been busy yourself?" she asked him before taking another bite.
"Huh? Oh, not really most of my surgeries were pushed back, I can leave after the scan."
"Ok" she scrunched up the foil paper and waited. He saw her jump a little and then settle back happy with her small release of gas.
Briefly he looked at his watch "We have five minutes."
She nodded and slid of the gurney carefully, brushing down her skirt and fixing her appearance. Together they walked to the office of the other OB.
"So Addison, how are you feeling today?"
"Fine, nothing unusual."
"Good good, still having morning sickness I hear?"
"Yeah." she scooted onto the gurney.
"Well we can be hopeful."
"Mhmm."
"Ok so if you lie back I can start."
Complying she laid back and rolled up her top also, eager to get things started. Mesmerized, Derek looked down at his wife's bare stomach, watched at how the smooth mound rose and fell just slightly with every breath she took.
"This is going to be cold"
Ghe gasped when the gel his her stomach, the wand pressing lightly until a grainy image came up on the screen; she didn't need any help with identifying her baby, she was its mother, not to mention the countries best, and it took no time at all to see the sex.
"You know don't you?"
She turned to look at him "Its hard not to look, I can tell you if you want?"
He shook his head "No, not yet."
"Ok" she turned back to the screen, his sigh making the hairs on her skin rise.
XXXXXX
"We have twenty more minutes Derek, for the last five you haven't said anything, what are you thinking?"
"As of this moment? Or the last five minutes?"
"It's up to you."
"Is it weird that I'm not excited about this pregnancy?"
"We all have our reasons."
"Well its not that I'm not excited...I mean there are men becoming fathers as we speak, why am I any different?"
"True" the counsellor fell silent, searching for her next answer then spoke again "If things were different, the whole slate was completely clean and this was still your first baby together, you're saying you still wouldn't feel anything?"
"I don't know." he twisted in the chair "There's such a selfishness factor of pregnancy don't you think?"
"Really? Care to elaborate?"
"Its just that she gets to know everything, do everything, eat anything and I'm on the outside looking in on what should be a shared occasion for us."
"Did you try the talking?"
He looked grim "That lasted only a few minutes, and it was about work." he rubbed at his face "I think the only time where we aren't talking but somehow connected is when we sleep." he smiled softly "We always end up cuddling, I watch her before she nods off and then…" he trailed off.
"I don't think that seems like the outside looking in."
"I suppose, but the feeling will ease up, it always does with me and her."
Ahhh that took ages to dot every i and cross every t.
Oh any suggestions with when I should update? I'm thinking every two days or something...depends how my manga obsession goes to plan.
Review, and I'll recommend you the greatest story ever told! (Be prepared to read right to left)
