A/N: Thank you Njgirl4ever for my first ever review :) it really made me happy. Also, thank you to everyone else who reviewed. I will be really busy this coming week and I probably won't be able to update, so I'm going to do it early! Ha-ha, well anyways, here's the next chapter. Enjoy!
xoxo PeetaMellarkLove :)
I duck my head as I step into the long, black limousine. I had never been in a car before; everything between the Seam and the School was within a 6 mile radius from my home, so there was never a need for a car. Besides, there was no way in hell my family could afford one.
Until now… I think. But I wasn't about to go off buying a car. There were more important things; helping out the people in the Seam, for one. The winners of the Hunger Games get showered with money, food and clothes from the Capitol. But their district also gets enough supplies to keep them out of poverty for up to a year.
But what happens after the year is over? Everyone gets to go back to being dirt poor. That's what happens. I have to help them, because I know what its like to live that way. Trust me, it sucks.
When I get home, I almost start tearing up. It feels good to be home. The musty smell of my house washes over me as I step in.
Home, sweet home I think, and then mentally correct myself, well until I get to the new house.
I take a look around and see that the living room is empty. The only furnishings left were the small table that my father made and the old, pull-out couch. The rest of our decorations were packed into two small boxes. The unnecessary things were going to be left behind because they would be replaced at the new house.
"Katniss?" a voice says to me. I turn around and see my mother standing there.
"Mom… hi, is everything okay?" I see a tear rolling down her cheek.
"Oh, I am fine, it's just that… I'm so happy." She walks forward and embraces me. "Of course I'm not happy that you had to live through all that, but I'm happy because you finally get to grow up not being, you know… poor. I'm sorry I was never there. It's just… just that it was hard. Dealing with your father's death was the hardest thing I ever had to go through." She starts to cry harder now.
"You know, Katniss, I loved that man so much. He was everything to me. When he… died… a part of me left with him, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving you to take care of things without me." I realize that tears are spilling from my eyes and I am also crying.
"When Prim was picked," she continues, "I was so scared of losing someone else. Then I saw you go up and volunteer for her, and I realized what a horrible mother I had been." Then she whispers so quiet that I can barely hear her, "I'm so sorry Katniss." She apologizes again and again and each time I tell her that I forgive her. At first, I was reluctant to truly forgive her, but I could see in her eyes how much she meant each apology.
I didn't know what to say. Over the years, walls of frustration and anger had built up inside me. It hurt me that she could never seem to move on, leaving me with a huge load on my shoulders. For a while, I was the hunter, the provider and the mother, doing what I could to keep my family alive. At twelve years old, I was feeding two mouths plus my own, and doing things that twelve year olds should never have to do. She left me and never even lifted a finger in attempt to help me.
But with those four words 'I'm so sorry Katniss', those walls that had built up over all those years came crashing down. So, I stood there and cried out four years of anger and hurt.
***
I was sitting on my bed when I found the note. When I saw it, my heart fluttered. It was from Gale.
Catnip,
When you find this, meet me at our usual spot.
I'll be there waiting. We need to talk.
Gale.
I read the note and my heart dropped to my stomach. Why did Gale need to speak to me? Did he..? No, it couldn't be. He wouldn't.
Any way, he was waiting for me and the next thing I know, I am running toward the fence at the edge of the forest.
I find the loose spot in the fence and crawl under carefully, and then make my way to the old, hallowed tree where I kept my hunting tools and weapons. They are there; exactly the same since I had left them. After using the Capitols' high end bows, my flimsy wooden one feels alien in my hands. I take a couple of practice shots on a tree, and find familiarity in the hand made bow. The first few arrows I shoot goes slightly off target but each of the next hits closer and closer to my mark. Finally, I feel comfortable with the weapon. I collected my arrows and head off towards me and Gale's usual meeting spot.
When I get there, I see him and gasp. He is sitting on a boulder with his back towards me, his hair wet and dripping. His wet shirt is strewn across the rock beside him lying in the sun to dry.
When he hears my gasp he turns around to face me. I've never noticed before just how good looking Gale was. I knew every little thing that the girls at school whispered about him when he passed them in the halls. They all wanted him. As desired as Gale was, he never seemed to take interest in any of them.
Still, his half nakedness was making me a bit fidgety.
As I walk towards him, his eyes scan over me and then focus on my eyes. His grey ones are illuminated by the beam of sunlight that is passing through the clearing in the trees. He smiles at me, but his eyes are solemn.
"Katniss…" he says and beckons me over to sit beside him. His eyes are on me the whole time and I drop my gaze as I feel the blood pool into my face. I drop my bow and quiver of arrows on the rock and take a seat next to him. We sit close to each other; the warm skin of his arm pressing against mine.
"I missed you." he says
"I missed you too Gale." It was true; I had missed him so much.
"I was so worried." Gale says and his eyes are sad. "You have no idea what I went through."
"Gale, let's not talk about this. I just got home and besides, I'm safe and here with you."
"When that District 2 girl caught you, I almost lost it. They way she was trying to cut you up into shreds… It made me SICK." His voice is getting angrier and angrier by the second. Suddenly, he gets up and whips around to face me, his body towering over mine.
"Do you have ANY idea how scared I was?" he shouts. His expression changes from pain to anger.
I feel my body recoil back as he yells at me. I've never seen him this angry before. Gale was usually good at hiding his emotions and this anger scares me.
"I thought I was going to lose you." he says through gritted teeth. Grief strikes across his features.
I try lightening the mood with a joke, "I'm sure you would have found another hunting partner." I guess I'm not much of a comedian because Gale picks up a heavy rock and with a grunt, throws it into the stream next to us. It lands with a thump and a huge splash.
If I thought he was angry earlier, he was furious now.
"You think this is a joke?" he yells. "Do you think watching you starve and dehydrate to death was EASY for me? Do you understand how hard it was for me, knowing I couldn't do anything to help you?"
"Gale, you know that I'm just as good a hunter as you. I would have been totally fine and –." I argue, but he interrupts me.
"Is that all it comes down to? Hunting? Is that all?" he barks. "You didn't hear what those Careers were scheming. You didn't have to listen to their sick jokes and hundred different ways they were planning to kill you." His whole body is shaking violently now, so I get up and take his hands in an attempt to steady him. He closes his eyes and sucks in a deep, calming breath. When his eyes open again, they're wet with tears. He quickly swipes at his eyes with the back of his hand. I reclaim his hand; bring both of them up to my heart, then lean against his chest.
"Gale, I'm so sorry" I whisper. We stand there for a minute until Gale pulls back, away from me. His eyes bear into mine, searching. I don't know what he's looking for.
He speaks, breaking the silence. "Katniss, do you know what the hardest thing for me to watch was?"
"I don't know Gale. What?" I sigh.
He pauses and then softly murmurs, "The hardest part was watching you be with him." He looks down and waits for me to say something. I don't know what to say so we stand there in an awkward silence.
Please, let's not talk about Peeta… I think to myself.
Gale repeats his question from earlier, "Katniss, do you love him? Do you love Peeta? Because I'm sick of not knowing."
I seriously don't know if I did or not, so I tell him that. "Gale, I don't know. I'm so confused about what's happening between me and Peeta." I sigh.
"Tell me the truth Katniss! I watched every single one of those kisses between you and him." He's getting angry again and his hands are crushing mine.
"Ow! Gale, stop it!" I shout, pulling my hands out of his. He freezes, grimaces, and then takes a step back. "Why do you care?" I ask.
I swear his jaw nearly touches the floor.
"Katniss are you blind?" He asks, incredulous.
"No, I'm not."
"Do you really not see how much I care for you?"
"Of course I can, best friends are supposed to care about each other." I did see how much he cared about me. I just didn't know whether our friendship could be… more.
"Katniss, I love you." he says.
"I love you too Gale." I look at him, uncomprehending.
"Ugh," he sighs, exasperated. "Katniss. I'm IN love with you."
Oh. I continue to stare at him like an idiot. I shake my head, trying to understand this new revelation.
"Oh Gale… I don't know what to think. Every time I try to figure out what is happening between me and Peeta and me and you, my mind draws a blank."
"I can help you fill in the blank" he murmurs and the next thing I know I'm kissing Gale.
He pulls me into his sturdy arms and I place my hands on his chest. His soft lips crush down on mine in eagerness. After a minute, we break apart breathing heavily. Just as soon as our breath returns, Gale is once again pressing his lips to mine. I feel safe in his strong muscular arms and his lips are warm and inviting. I'd once imagined what it was like to kiss Gale, and to tell the truth, this was better than what I imagined.
But then guilt washes over me and I find myself breaking away from Gale. His lips try to find mine but I put a hand to his mouth to stop him.
"Gale, please stop. We can't—I can't do this. Not now, not here." I pant. "I need to go!" I shout, suddenly remembering that I have to go to the Mayor's with Peeta for supper.
"Can't you stay Catnip?" Gale asks.
"I really have to go." I say, turning around to leave. "I'll talk to you later."
Before I can run off, Gale catches my arm and pulls me back to him. He kisses me sweetly on the cheek."Okay, talk to you later." he says, grinning hugely.
Thank you so so so much for reading my story! Please review, it will absolutely make my day 10000000000000x more wonderful! :)
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