Chapter Two: - Donatello-
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I swallowed the knot forming in my throat.
So much had changed in thirty five years, I don't even recognize any of the city's landscape anymore.
Walking away from the memorial graveyard, my fleshy hand grabbing tightly to April's, to the point her knuckles started turning white. I panicked, fearing that I have probably crushed her small hand, but panicked even more when I realized I was being guided away from the memorial area that was placed in honor of my brothers, and towards a bustling crowded street!
My heart raced, finding myself being guided down towards a public street, many, many countless and numerous humans eye me lazily, but none of them fretting, panicking or saying anything, they just pass us by.
I panicked so badly, I fled her touch and stifled a scream, I ran back towards the memorial area, and though I knew it was barely three minutes away, my heart was throbbing in my chest and in my head, almost as if I had run for miles!
Gasping, latching to the nearest tree in my path, trying my best to calm my racing breath, the throbbing in my chest, the heat in my eyes, the chill in my bones, causing my legs to shake, and the pumps of my bionic heart slightly pump faster, responding to the robotic side of my brain, and I feel my limbs shivering again.
I'm scared. God I'm so scared.
Terror must have been clear on my face, because when April found me, she assured me that it's fine, and that no one will come near me, that I'm safe, but if I still don't feel comfortable with walking out in public, then it is alright. She reached into her belt pocket and pulled out what I recognized as some soft of cell phone, and watched her make a call.
I stared aimlessly at my surroundings, though keeping my ears to her voice, it was enough to comfort me, even if I were hearing her voice, I weren't really listening, I was just pleased to hear her voice again. Now eyeing the trees and the grass, watching squirrels scurry around, birds chirped, life was overwhelming, I've spent long, painful hours in Bishop's lab, to the point I forgot how it felt to be alive!
April ended the call, claiming that some guy named Tyler was coming over with a car, and they'll take us home.
I have no home, without my brothers and father, I no longer have a home.
April took off her long, black cape, despite the obvious cuts on the sides, caused by my treacherous claws, and draped it over my shoulders, and for the life of me, I never could remember the last time I've slipped into a nice, warm piece of clothing, and it had her scent, it helped me relax. Slowly my shivering and trembling eased down, and I felt much better.
She said it was the same one Leo wore till the day he died, and I grew too hesitant to stay dressed in it, not wanting to damage something one of my brothers wore, it carried too many emotions and memories, it hurt.
Slipping my fleshy arm into the fabric of the sleeve, I felt my fingertips caress it, sensing the somewhat leathery-like feeling. It reminded me so much of Leo, soft yet strong, tough around the edges, yet still lean and comfortable, and the warmth, it just makes me feel so safe, so content, so close to a brother I have lost. I felt the slightest twitch at the corner of my mouth, as a single tear trickled down my face, and I realized I was smiling, the memory was so fresh, yet so far away, I was happy, and yet so alone.
I have not smiled in years, in thirty five years, to be exact.
Thirty five years, that makes me fifty years old now, right?
What of April, then? She is at least six years older than me, so is she about sixty years old now?
A black car drove near the clearing, and April carefully placed her hand on my shoulders, she tugged gently, asking me to release the tree and follow her, begging me to listen, and I hesitated, the shivering returned to my fleshy leg, while the pumps in my robotic leg began to rattle, it bothered me, I really need to repair the cylinder, it's hurting me.
I was cold, Leo's cape kept me warm, I opened my eyes and looked at April, she looked so old, either it be all the turmoil she had went through, or all the time that had passed, if not both, I'll never know.
"Donny, please." She soothed, her warm needle-like fingers smoothly caressing my cold cheek, carefully trailing lines between my head plate and my flesh, she flicked away the teardrop, smiling softly, "Let us go home."
Listening to my breath, feeling the air going in and out of my throat, sensing the heat and the coolness, I closed my eyes.
She placed her lips on my cheek, kissing me softly, "C'mon."
In a heartbeat, a torrent of forgotten emotions bedazzled me, swelling in my chest, so slowly I nodded, allowing myself to smile again; I eyed her, trying to hold back the tears. Smiling, she tugged at my hand, and she guided me towards the car's door. I hunched down a bit, despite the pain that jolted my spin, but I dare not show it.
Bishop had fun scrapping the edges of my shell off my back, wanting to reach the base of my spine, and I don't want to think about how much of my shell he had already removed, it's frightening enough thinking about it.
I stepped into the car, now seating myself on the backseat, and April climbed in after me, now picking my fleshy hand, soothing it, smiling lovingly. I nodded in gratitude, and closed my eyes.
God, I was so tired.
….
I opened my eyes, and atop of me, I saw the white light.
I gasped, jumping in my bed, wanting to bolt.
It took me a second glance to realize I weren't in the dissection chamber, not tied down with straps and belt, no wires, needles or pins attached to my skin, no poking and prodding, and most important of all, no Bishop! No, not any more.
I was in a casual white bedroom, it smelled like a hospital, but milder and with the scent of – strawberries? With a wooden-tile floor, a door and a window, with drapes and a carpet, a study desk, a computer, a wardrobe and a privet bathroom, I relaxed, if only a little. I mean, the room did look kind of homey. Although white used to be one of my favorite colors, I am beginning to gain a sense of loathing against the color, it frightens me, it reminded me too much of the dissection room Bishop would hold me in when he's in a foul mood.
"Good morning." A voice spoke.
Sitting at the side of the bed, with my feet touching the soft, wood-tiled floor, ignoring the welcomed cool sensation in my toes, I, or my ears actually, could not process the voice's sound waves that entered my ears, it was insufficient data, I could not recognize it, nor remember it, and it did not match any of the sound samples stored in my memory bank either, it was new.
I turned around, slowly and steadily, if not a little hesitant, though turning hurt my neck and spine, all due to the bionic cords Bishop had implanted into my backside, and tried to look at who had entered the bedroom.
The figure was feminine and slender, with purplish hair and brown eyes.
It was a woman, probably thirty years old; or five to ten years younger than I am.
"You- look familiar." I murmured, my memory frizzed for a second, and the data base at the core of my brain began to function, retrieving lost files and stored memory files from the base date system, trying to find matching results.
"Don, it's me," The woman spoke, unafraid by my appearance; she walked closer; slowly, she eased down on the bed, now sitting next to me, she smiled with a twinkle in her glittery eyes, and dare put her hand on my fleshy hand, "Angel." She identified herself.
I stared, a gasp slowly slitting my throat, I bolted up, walking backwards and away from her.
It- it couldn't be! She- she hardly looked anything like that Purple-Dragon-punk-wannabe teen, she looked- like- like- well, like a woman! A delicate, narrow shouldered, humble lady, with her hair down, her strands curly and lazing over her shoulders, those bangs over her eyes, she- she was something else! Someone else completely!
"Y- you- you've- …?" I stuttered, unable to speak.
She smiled, "Yeah, long time no see." She giggled, "And Yes, Donny, it is me."
"You've changed." I whispered, eyeing her, my brain already saving copies of her image, storing them in the date base, "I- didn't recognize you." I admitted, ignoring the buzzing of the memory bank burning saved data to the backup system.
"Same goes to you." she got up and soothed her knee length skirt, her black-lined-in-white business suite looked so pretty, hugging her fine slender figure like that, "We thought you were dead." She admitted quietly, "I'm glad we were wrong."
I swallowed, not really sure what approach to take.
It's- been so long since I've been near a woman, and damn, just look at Angel right now is making all these funny, very old teenager thoughts and feelings resurface; but who am I kidding? In the way I am now, no woman in her right mind would want to be anywhere near me, so why should they even befriend me, unless they have a good reason.
"Right now," I began, swallowing my sorrow, "I wish if Bishop had killed me." I ignored the drained, shocked look in her eyes, "At least, I could have died painlessly, to have joined my brothers and father! You wouldn't have had to look at me, like- like this!" I hissed bitterly, gesturing to my half robotic, half flesh body, it sickened me, how I used to be so fascinated by such things.
If anyone would have told me, when I was a teenager, that this is the life I would spend my last days living, I would have been interested, maybe even excited, I had such a simple, shallow mind back then, it sickens me.
Pulled out of my thoughts, I felt her body pressing onto mine in a fierce hug, her sobbing wrenched my heart.
"You idiot! Don't you dare say that!" she scolded, her fist harmlessly hitting my bionic shoulder, wanting to emphasize her distaste with my statement, "Do you have any idea how much it hurt to lose you? We thought you were dead, goddamnit!" she cried, anger and pain battling in her voice, "Master Splinter knew you'd come back, he said you will! Even Raph believed you'd come back! He refused to give up, he knew you'd come back to us again!" she sobbed, now sniffling, calming herself, if only a little, "M- Mikey, he was so broken when you were gone, you have no idea how he and Leo needed you! They needed you so badly! They all needed you!"
I shivered, and I could no longer support my own weight; my legs, my knees gave up on me, giving up to gravity, and they buckled, dropping me with Angel, still hugging me to the floor, but we both managed to balance ourselves, not falling on each other, and we collapsed to the floor. She pulled a little back, sniffling and upset, her tears running down her pale face, her hands on my cheeks, her thumb brushing back tears that I never felt trickling down my face, she breathed out, trying to force a small smile.
"R- Raph," she began, breathlessly trying to calm herself, "I promised him, I promised him that when you come back, and he's not around to greet you, I promised I'd beat you up!" she laughed, but her smile broke and more hot, salty tears trickled like a river down her face, and only now, with our closeness, did I take note of her pink lipstick and faint, purple eyeshade, "H- he asked me to tell you, to tell you that he loved you, that he's sorry he never got the chance to say goodbye." She whimpered.
She broke into a heart wrenching sob, her shoulders sagging, she sobbed and hiccupped, sniffling and latching on to my tighter than before, she buried her face in my neck, and all I could do was stare at the far wall.
More tears trickled down my face, and all I could do was stare.
I closed my eyes, and I hugged her, I screwed my eyes shut and I hugged her so tightly, I was in too much pain to care if my bionic arm hurt her or not, it was just too much to bare, it hurt, and the buzzing in my memory bank was not helping! Flashing images from my frizzed memory in the back of my mind, reminding me of everything, the good times and the bad times.
At that moment, I never felt so alone in my entire life.
I- I want to see them again.
I- I'm so alone.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
A/N: Um, yeah, whatever… review please!
