DISCLAIMER: If I owned Naruto trust me Hinata would've totally owned Pein's over pierced ass. Kay? Kay.

Chapter 1- Sasuke meets the Host Club

Sasuke's P.O.V

The girl stepped forward,

"My name's Haruhi Fujioka" she declared matter of factly, "And you ar—"

Then the louder ginger interrupted her, "Who the hell are you you're not a first year"

"He's not a third year" said the small one. Awww he's kinda cute, damn I feel like a pedo now.

"He's not a second year "said the obnoxious blond

"Again who the hell are you" the twins said simultaneously.

Damn gingers stop that I don't like chicks with pink what the fuck makes you think I'm gonna like two guy gingers to close to pink.

"I'm Sasuke Uchiha that's who the hell I am" I say and almost instinctively put my hand on my hip.

"Oooo spicy little one aren't you" they said in unison.

Damn it that's the last straw.

"Look. I don't even know where the hell I am or who the hell you are, well except for you Haruki or whatever" I scoffed. Suddenly there was the little one that made me feel like a pedophile before. What the hell where did he come from!

"Well Sas-chan you're in the Host Club" he said.

The Host Club. Like a girls version of a gentlemen's club! My jaw must have dropped, because they all just stared at me.

"What?" I said. Then I felt the need to duck again. Once again a vase flew at my head, smashing when it hit the wall.

"Daddy doesn't like him" said the obnoxious blond one who doesn't make me feel like a pedo.

"Tamaki for the last time you're not my father!" Haruhi yelled at him.

"But Haruhi" he whined.

"No buts Senpai" she said "Sorry about him"

"Well anywaaaaaaayyyy" the twins said. Together. Again. Damn annoying gingers,"We're the Hitaachin brothers".

"I'm Hikaru" one said

"I'm Kaouru" the other said.

"Sasuke" I said.

"I'm Mitskuni Haninozouka" Mitskuni said, "But you can just call me Honey-senpai. Oh and this is Usa-chan." Damn it I feel like a pedophile again.

"I'm Mori" said another one. Geeze and I thought I was a stoic.

"He's Tamaki Souh" the twins said. TOGETHER. AGAIN! They only have one more time and swear I'll chidori their asses into next week.

"Ummm, why is he growing mushrooms in a corner?" I asked

"We're just not going to talk about that right name my name is Kyouya" Mr. Four-eyed said, "I'm the vice president of this club. The one you see in the corner currently managing his mushr4oom farm is our president."

"Mommy you're not helping. I don't like him he reminds me way too much of those damn doppelgangers!" Tamaki said no scratch that he whined.

"Tamaki you're not helping either quit growing mushrooms just because the girls aren't coming today doesn't mean you can do whatever you want to" Kyouya said. Wow I'm surprised he's not president, he's way more competent than this other one.

"And do please stop calling me mommy" he said, "I am not Haruhi's mother nor are you her father okay?"

"Yes" Tamaki said then he came out of the corner.

"So I'm guessing you're new here. How old are you?" Tamaki asked me

"I'm 15" I stated simply.

"Cool then that means that you're a first year with us" the twins said. TOGETHER! AGAIN!

"Look could you two not talk at the same time its really fucking annoying and I'm trying not to chidori your ass okay?" I snapped okay leave me alone.

"What the hell is a chiori" they said TOGETHER! That's it I'm gonna barque me some ginger! I did a few quick hand signs and watched as they all observed in awe. HA! Suck on that I don't know what wack job village this is but I'll show them.

"CHIDORI!"I yelled but nothing happened. WTF! They all started laughing. I tried everything the only thing that seemed to still work was my taijutsu.

Okay where the hell am I