I sat with Allison on the school's front steps waiting to see if the boys were going to show up. I had to admit that it got a little awkward at times. Regardless of our newfound rapport, we were still from completely different worlds and it was difficult to find similar topics to discuss. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Allison drop her gaze to her shoes and fiddle with her top nervously. I saw why in a few seconds as I saw Andy get out of the car that had just pulled up. He looked a little angry and upset and, I could only guess that it was his father in the car with him, but he looked around and when he saw us his face brightened and he ran over.
"Hey," he exclaimed cheerily taking a seat beside Allison. Allison looked uncomfortable for a second before she relaxed. She must feel as unsure as I did about all of this.
"Are we the only ones here yet?" he continued, looking from Allison to me. I nodded and studied him. He looked nervous and was fidgeting a little and it brought a small smile to my face as I deduced that he was affected as Allison was. There was hope for them yet.
We sat there talking about trivial things when suddenly the question I dreaded came up again.
"Hey Claire, Are you okay?" Andy asked looking concerned. Damn it! How did people notice? I had checked in the mirror earlier and it looked fine! I started to panic and became defensive.
"I'm fine! Why does everyone keep asking me that?" Andy quietened and looked away awkwardly knowing not to push it.
Thankfully Brian decided to show up at this moment. He looked like a nervous wreck and was eyeing us carefully. I intervened and sent him an inviting smile. He looked positively relieved and he almost skipped over.
"Hey everyone!" he said a little awkwardly. We all smiled at him warmly in welcome. He took a seat next to me and joined in on our simple chatter quickly. Brian had soon studied me for a little too long but before I could protest again, Andy simply shook his head at Brian and the boy said nothing. I sent Andy a relieved smile and the bell rang then signalling us all to split up and make our way to our respective classes.
During English I could not concentrate properly. My mind just kept replaying things I had not taken into account on Saturday. Like the fact that John was not into the whole 'one guy, one girl' thing. There were so many girls I had seen in his wallet and all of them seemed prettier, sexier and cooler than me. I was just going out of my way to get hurt, I knew that but I did not want to give up yet. There was just something about him that drew me in. I never thought that I would be a sucker for a bad boy but here I was. There was more to him than that though. I knew there was.
I had not been able to focus all day. I could not stop thinking about the possible horrific confrontation that was sure to happen with John. Every class I walked into I hesitantly scanned the crowd, afraid that I had never noticed that he was in one of them but I had not encountered him at all. A part of me was disappointed but the bigger part of me was overjoyed at being able to put off what was sure to be a travesty.
Suddenly lunch came and I walked into the cafeteria and sat with my 'friends'. I was surprised though when I saw Andy was sitting at my table and Allison sitting far away over the other side of the cafeteria alone. I sighed unhappily. I had so much hope for them to work out. If they couldn't how would me and John? We were a bigger fucked up mess than they were that was for sure.
Andy seemed to notice me staring then and he smiled and waved at me, which I returned half-heartedly. I had seen the look of guilt in his eyes though. I sighed and dropped my head onto the table. I felt someone nudge my arm and I peeked upwards. It was Sarah, the biggest bitch of the group.
"Hey Claire, didn't you get enough sleep? Oh well, guess what?" she said conspiratorially lowering her voice and addressing me and the rest of the girls in the vicinity, "I saw Andy Clark kissing that freak that always wears black."
I clenched my fists under the table trying to suppress my anger. Sarah made a noise of disgust as she spotted Allison across the cafeteria.
"I mean seriously can you believe her? And as for Andy, well he probably got her drunk and pregnant and now he feels guilty…."
By this point I had had enough. I stood and turned to Sarah.
"Sarah, why don't you get the fuck over yourself! Who gives a shit who Andy is dating? Allison is a really nice girl and by the way is so much prettier than you!" And with that I stormed out of the cafeteria while Sarah stood there, mouth opening and closing as if still trying to find a comeback.
