Story: "Even Heroes Bleed" by Saoirse Robinson

Chapter 2: "Black Hat"

Individual Chapter Rating: T for mild sexual descriptions and language.

Word Count: 4,900

Chapter Description: Kirito is forced to work for the CGA, and slowly begins to understand the consequences.


Black Hat

A boy with sandy-blond hair took off his shoes in the foyer. Everything was quiet in the house, though he could smell something cooking in the kitchen.

"Gene, is that you? Gene?" A man appeared in the doorway. "Hey, Gene, shout that you're home or something, okay buddy?"

"Sorry, Dad," Gene said, pushing his glasses up on his nose. "I'll do it next time."

"Dinner isn't for an hour. Do you want to go outside and play?"

"I've got to go do homework," Gene said, then headed upstairs, his father staring bemusedly after him.

Once upstairs, Gene locked his door behind him. His bedroom was decorated with little murals on the walls, some of alligators, some of Calvin and Hobbes. His bookshelf was filled with things like Percy Jackson and the Magic Tree House series, and there were baseball cards and a gameboy on his nightstand. On his desk, however, was a sleek, unadorned computer, and beside it was an AmuSphere. Going to his desk, he turned on the computer.

"Antean," he whispered.

The whispered word revealed a hidden user icon.

It required a password, then his fingerprint. After that his desktop appeared. He had several notifications waiting, one of them a message containing photos. They were photos of the same person he'd been keeping an eye on, Kazuto Kirigaya, though these looked to have been taken in-game. He was outside a big house next to a lake, with Yuuki Asuna and...a child?

A message bubble popped up. He is working for Alpha.

Gene's eyes widened.

Who is the girl? He asked.

In the photos, the girl-child had no player cursor. A bug perhaps? No, it couldn't be. The child looked ordinary, but after all that he'd learned, he would never assume anything about the legendary Kirito – the game savior, the Black Swordsman – was ordinary.

We don't know yet. We are still investigating.

Move faster, Gene replied.

He examined the photos more closely. The girl and Yuuki smiled in all of them, but Kazuto...

Time is of the essence.


"No, please don't," Kirito begged, but Magdalene's arms were all around him, like tentacles, pulling him close in a kiss.

He didn't want to kiss her, he didn't. He was trapped, and someone was standing across the room, recording them. Or...?

"Asuna!" Kirito cried, spying her out of the corner of his eye. He shoved Magdalene away. Asuna had tears in her eyes.

"Kirito, how could you?" she gasped, backing away from him.

"Asuna," he cried, "Asuna, let me explain. I love you..."

"I hate you!"

She was running away. Kirito chased after her, but the faster he ran, the further away she got...

Then he woke up.

He awoke with his head on his desk, blinking at the picture of the three of them. A puddle of drool had formed under his mouth.

Sitting up straight, he looked around, realizing that it was morning. Just a dream. He shook himself. His study was messy, as it usually was, crisp packets scattered about, his futon rumpled and unmade. It must've been early: the apartment was quiet, Asuna probably still fast asleep. His computer had fallen asleep during the night too, the screen black. He tried to remember what he'd been working on only hours ago. Entering his password, he brought up the screen again, searching through his code. Whatever he'd been doing last night had worked: a large ACCESS GRANTED screen flashed at him, and there was a file on his desktop that had just finished downloading. He dropped in into the secured folder that linked straight to the Core Group's servers. Well, that's done, he thought, not particularly pleased with himself. He yawned.

Opening his internet browser, he decided to check the news. A poor decision. The first big news story that popped up read: Small User-Owned Gaming World Hacked. Making sure the volume was turned down low, he let the video report play.

"I'm standing here with Marie Aiswalder, one of many users who have designed custom worlds in what is known as the VRMMORPG World Sphere, popular with all sorts of gamers all over the globe." The reporter was holding a microphone between herself and a distraught-looking young woman. "Marie's gaming world was hacked two weeks ago, and there have been no leads since. Marie, can you tell us how many users your world has?"

"Two hundred and fourteen," Marie said, her voice unsteady. "Or at least it did...all but fifty have deleted their accounts."

Kirito's heart clenched. Two weeks ago...that was the night after he'd met with Magdalene for the first time. He remembered hacking into several worlds that night, at the behest of the CGA. He didn't much like to think about what they wanted with the information.

"Now, your world is called Harbinger of Conquest Online, is that correct?"

Marie nodded, and suddenly Kirito remembered. He felt a pang inside as he watched Marie begin to cry.

"What happened when Harbinger of Conquest Online was hacked?"

Marie took a deep breath, speaking into the mic. "It was me and ten other admins running the whole gaming world, but now none of us can log in. Someone else is administrating the system, making changes...we warned the users. The police can't do anything, they're trying. There's just no trace..."

"So the police have no idea who is behind this?"

"They say," Marie stammered, "they just said it's an unidentifiable hacker group. And there's no way to stop them at this time. Harbinger was my dream, my livelihood. I was able to pay my rent from the funds from two-hundred players, but now..."

The camera flashed back to the reporter. "Some are protesting that this hacker group is hurting small-business gamers, while others are saying that small, user-created worlds are dangerous, and are the most prone to exploitation–"

He couldn't take it anymore. Kirito clicked the red button in the corner, exiting the video.

As he puttered around in the kitchen making tea, Kirito thought about what there was to be done. Nothing was all he could come up with. He'd already spent an entire day and a night trying to hack into the more secure part of the CGA's servers – which was where the video they were using to blackmail him was presumably stored – to no avail. But say he did hack into their servers. How many copies of the video were there? How many places had they stored it? Perhaps on a personal drive, not even connected to the internet. What then? No, there was no way he could risk them using that blackmail against him. He couldn't risk Asuna. He'd never wanted to be the bad guy...but then he never imagined himself being put into a position like this.

Just then, Asuna came out of her room, yawning and stretching. She took one look at Kirito and her brow furrowed.

"What?" he was pouring hot water into tea cups, his hand shaking slightly.

"Kirito, have you been sleeping at all?" she came close to him, taking his head in her hands.

He looked down guiltily, "I...I've had trouble sleeping. Finals are hanging over our heads, and grad school..." Asuna was stroking his face. Looking down, he could see she was wearing only a nightie, and a thin one at that. He felt himself blushing.

"Thanks for making tea," she said, smiling. Leaning in, she kissed him.

Her kiss was gentle, tender, and it flooded him with a warmth that was nearly dizzying. He thought of the dream, and felt relieved that Asuna would never know, would never find out what he had done. He would never willingly betray her trust... He placed a hand on her waist, and another in her hair, remembering the day they'd announced their intent to marry...

"Well, you're eighteen now, and Yuuki's nineteen. It's clear to me how much you love my daughter," Asuna's father had said. "Take good care of her."

"Be sure to give us lots of grandchildren!" Her mother had said.

Kirito's own sister – cousin – had been happy for them. "You two were meant to be together. After all you've been through..."

Asuna was pulling Kirito away from the counter, back toward the bedroom.

"A-Asuna..." Kirito glanced at the clock. "It's almost time to go. We have to catch the L train."

"I don't care," she said, pulling him past the doors to the bedroom, kissing him all the while.

The sun rose higher in the sky as the sheets of their little bed became rumpled. Birds were already chirping outside their window, but they took flight when they heard the noises come from within. As Kirito held Asuna in his arms, sweat beading on his brow, he felt relieved. He was able to forget about his problems when he was close to her, if only for a little while.

After, as the couple lay in bed, it felt to Kirito as though not much time had passed, but when he looked at the clock, he realized that his first class started in ten minutes. "Asuna..."

She was dozing on his chest, wrapped up in their sheets. "Sorry, I fell asleep... Oh no!" She spotted the time as well, leaping to her feet. She searched around for her clothes, throwing them on, and Kirito smiled despite himself. When she caught him grinning, she scowled at him. "Find my hairbrush. Please!"

Eventually they arrived in the Upper West Side, through Kirito was so late he decided it would be better to go straight to his second class. Standing in the midst of the huge sandstone buildings, he gave Asuna a kiss goodbye, then watched her head off in the direction of the lab where she did her internship. As soon as she was out of sight, Kirito checked his eyeglass for notifications. Sure enough, there was one pending from Sylver.

New task. Copy all admin data from Tygris Serum Online by 6 a.m. tomorrow.

Kirito's heart sank. Another small-world hack? He'd never even heard of Tygris Serum Online. He was beginning to grow disturbed by the CGA's interest in user-created worlds. These made up the bulk of the World Sphere, after all. Why weren't they sending him after the big corporations? That's what Kirito used to do, before the CGA had found him: attempt to hack into the corporation-created worlds, to find and repair loopholes the administrators may have built into the world for the company's benefit. It was all about preventing the next death game...wasn't it? He was beginning to realize that, well... no, it wasn't. At least not for the CGA. They had some other motive...

Which was none of his concern, as long as they had blackmail. Sighing, he slouched off to class, lamenting over the hot green tea sitting untouched on his kitchen counter back home.

Later that night, after eating dinner and spending some time in-game with Asuna and Yui, Kirito actually slept. Curled up against Asuna in their shared futon, his expression was peaceful...until he felt his eyeglass vibrating in the pocket of his pajamas. Fetching it, he remembered he had purposefully set an alarm for midnight. Easing himself away from Asuna, he tiptoed out of the room and over to his study, where he logged onto his computer like he did every night.

Hack into Tygris Serum Online...obtain admin files...

Opening the console, Kirito began entering code. Over the course of an hour, his screen flashed red several times: Access Denied. He tried again, entering line after line of code, filling page after page. Access Denied. An hour past, then two. Access Denied. This was a tough server, but he'd faced tougher before...

It's the hype, he realized, after two more hours of fruitless attempts. The hacks have been all over the news, and any world-builder with half a brain has doubled their defenses against hackers. Kirito experienced a brief moment of angst when he realized that they might actually be fishing for people who were trying to break in – trying to discover his identity. No, that wasn't possible. He was safe. His own defenses were impenetrable, he had made sure of that. No one could trace him. No one could hack him, not his desktop, not his eyeglass, not even his NerveGear. He'd spent years making sure of that. It didn't matter how good this gamemaster was: he was better.

Reassured, he plowed onward, thinking all the while of the video, the way they'd framed him, the way they were blackmailing him. It was the only thing keeping him going. Yet he kept seeing the same screen: Access Denied. Whoever had built Tygris Serum Online was a pro, and knew how to encrypt, protect, and hide important files. Kirito started to sweat around 4:30 a.m. What could he do?

5:00 a.m., another Access Denied screen. He pressed on. There was no way he could fail. What if he did? He didn't want to think about that. 5:15 a.m... Tygris' backend was labyrinthine. It was finally around 5:30 a.m. that Kirito slumped back in his chair, starving, thirsty, and resigned to the truth: he could not break in.

His eyeglass beeped quietly. Opening the one eye, he saw a notification from Sylver.

Progress?

Kirito sighed. Unable to break in, he whispered. His message appeared as text on the screen, and after a minute it appeared as received.

Unacceptable, was the response. Keep trying.

Give me more time. I need until tomorrow morning, Kirito messaged.

Tonight. You have until 6 p.m. If you fail we send your video to Asuna.

After that last message, Kirito took off his eyeglass, set it on the desk, and let his head fall into his hands. He stayed that way until the sun rose outside his window, the Access Denied screen shining black and red in front of him.

Asuna caught onto his mood while they were swaying on the train together. "Is everything okay?"

The sound of her voice made him start, "I'm okay. I'm just tired. I have an exam coming up on Friday."

Asuna rubbed his arm. "I made you a pork sandwich." She dangled the bag in front of him, "it's your favorite recipe."

She was smiling, offering a wrapped lunchbox to him as she rested her head on his shoulder. How much longer could this last? Asuna, would you still do this for me if you knew what I've done? Would you still love me?

When they arrived on the Upper West Side, Kirito walked Asuna to the building where she had her first class. She gave him a kiss, eying him with concern before she entered the building. "You should go take a nap in the library," she said.

"I'll try."

He waved at her as she disappeared. The moment she was out of sight, he strode back the way they had come: back toward the train station.

Once back in Brooklyn, Kirito ran through the streets, heading back to the heart of Williamsburg. He fumbled with the keys to get back into their apartment, and once upstairs, he went to his study. He was breathing hard. He had an idea – a crazy idea to be sure, but it was his only chance. Laying down on his futon, he slipped on his NerveGear and took the dive...

Rather than entering New Aincrad, however, Kirito flipped through the world catalog, searching for Tygris Serum Online.

There. Selecting a random avatar and an alternate player name, he logged in.

When he came too, he was in a Town of Beginnings. Tygris Serum Online looked to be some kind of sailing game. This was a port town, and all the characters seemed to be dressed up as pirates. He could see the sea in the distance, and there were several stalls where players were purchasing pirate-like wares. As he looked around, Yui flew out from his pocket in navigation-pixie form, as she often did when he switched worlds.

"Daddy!" she shouted, flying toward him. Then her face fell. "Where's Mama?"

"She'll come visit later," he said, then lowered his voice. "Yui, I need your help."

Hovering next to him, Yui saluted him adorably. "Aye-aye, captain!"

Kirito smiled despite himself. "Yui..."

"What is it?"

Kirito sighed, "Before I tell you, you have to promise me to keep this a secret from your...from your Mama."

Yui looked confused, "Why?"

How can I explain this? "It's complicated, Yui. But I need to do this for all of us."

"Okay," Yui agreed, though she still seemed confused. "What do you need me to help with?"

Kirito took a deep breath. "I need your help locating a GM console in this world."

Yui's brow furrowed. "I think I can help." She closed her eyes. "I'm detecting thirty different islands. It will take me a minute to scan them."

Yui glowed softly as she performed the search. After a minute, she opened her eyes.

"We'll have to teleport. Let me take you there, Daddy." Reaching out, Yui placed a tiny hand on his nose, and they disappeared together in a wash of blue light.

When they reappeared, they were in a jungle-like environment. Kirito pulled up his map. They were on a large island, and when he looked around, he didn't see other monsters or players around.

"The monsters here are high-level," Yui said, "but I've executed a command that will make us invisible to them unless we attack first."

"Thanks, Yui," he said. "Now, do you know where the GM console is?"

"That way," she pointed. "Follow me." She flew off. Kirito followed at a run behind her.

Sure enough, they passed plenty of monsters, though none of them noticed as Kirito and Yui went by. It seemed they were also sufficiently high-level to act as a deterrent against players coming to this island, because he didn't see anyone else around. They went for a while, but eventually Yui stopped in front of what appeared to be a tree covered in vines. When she touched it, a black cube appeared, protruding from the trunk. Looking down, Kirito could see a keypad on it. He placed his fingers on it, and a screen appeared in midair. He began entering code, but he quickly got the same screen as before: Access Denied.

"Yui," Kirito said, thinking fast, "you still have the code from that ALfheim admin card in your system, don't you?" I know she does, I saved it there myself.

Yui nodded, "Here, let me." She flew down to the cube, and when she landed, it began to glow.

The screen flashed green. Kirito's heart leapt when he saw it: Access Granted.

He began typing quickly now, entering line after line of commands. Even as he did this, however, he thought about how much energy the game master had spent designing this world. Exotic birds cawed around him, and he could hear the rush of waves in the distance. This world was crafted with love. Why did the CGA want it? Would they do what they'd done to Harbinger of Conquest? Was it right to allow all this to happen, just so he could keep Asuna from seeing that video? He'd already gone to so much effort to hide it, at this point he looked more guilty than ever. Still, a part of him was clamoring for him to stop, to show Asuna the video, and damn the consequences. How could he just stand by while the CGA did this? Worse, he was a part of it...

Kirito was sweating as he coded, despite the fact that he still had several hours to send the files to the Core Group. Things were going swiftly now. He got a few more Access Denied warnings, but it seemed that Yui had somehow bypassed most of the blockades he'd been running up against before. His fingers moved in a blur, the screen filling up with green letters and numbers.

"Get ready Yui," he said. "When I say so, capture these files and save them to my NerveGear."

"Got it!"

Another five minutes..four...he was getting closer. The virtual jungle wasn't even really hot, and he was sweating. Finally the screen flashed it's message one final time: Access Granted. Splitting the files off as game items, they flew out of the console, sparkling like gems. Yui caught them in her arms, glowing as she saved them to his NerveGear. When she was done, the items had disappeared.

Kirito let out a whoop, "We did it! We did it, Yui!"

Yui was clapping, flying around in circling and giggling. Kirito was happy...or was he? Inwardly, he felt bad about what he had used her to do. What he had done...

"Yui," he said, "What we did just now...I only did it because I had to. I did it to protect us."

"I know, Daddy," Yui smiled, her wings fluttering. "I know you're good."

Kirito flushed. He patted her head. Despite her childlike reassurances, he felt guilty. He had been her father for years now, and had come to realize that Yui was so much more than a computer program. She was capable of things he still didn't understand, even after all he'd learned. Although she existed only in the local memory of his NerveGear and Asuna's AmuSphere, she was also his daughter. He couldn't explain it. And this was the first time he could ever remember feeling like he was a bad parent.

A little while later, Kirito awoke on his futon, staring up at the ceiling. He rolled over, taking off his NerveGear, and went to connect it to his computer. As soon as he did, the download started. After a while he could see all the files he'd stolen, every last one. He sighed. Dropping the files into the secure folder, he leaned back in his chair, telling himself that he was just lucky he'd completed the task in time.

After he ate the pork sandwich Asuna had made him, he realized he still had several hours until Asuna would arrive home, and he didn't feel like going all the way back to campus. Perhaps he'd go have a drink, maybe pick up some things for dinner. He could have it all prepared by the time Asuna got home. Struck with renewed inspiration, he searched through the house for their grocery totes, then headed off to the local grocery, humming to himself.

When Asuna finally came home the sun was setting, and the kitchen was filled with fragrant steam. Although she was clearly tired, she perked up when she realized what Kirito had done.

"Oh, my...you made dinner?" she seemed beside herself. "I didn't think you'd be home in time."

Kirito laughed, "I left early to make this for you." He dipped a spoon into the broth, then brought it up to her nose.

"Oden!" Asuna cried. "Oh, you are the best husband in the world!"

Kirito blushed, the praise making his heart swell. But as he ladled the Oden out into dishes, a nagging voice reminded him that she didn't know the whole story. She didn't even know him anymore. He'd started hacking before they were married, before they'd even met, but his obsession with stopping power-hungry game masters had only increased after the death game. She didn't know what he did after she went to sleep, after he slipped out of bed. She never had. And now, since becoming involved with the CGA, he'd become someone else entirely. She wouldn't love that person, Kirito thought. She wouldn't love me if she knew.

He kept a smile on his face, though, as they finished their dinner and talked about school, exams, and their friends from the World Sphere. When they finally took the dishes over to the sink, they washed them together, Asuna smiling to herself. After they were done, the dishes drying on the mat, She took him by the hand, leading him back to their bedroom.

Leading him over to the futon, she helped him off with his shirt, then took off her own. They kissed. The kisses lasted for a long while, until they were pulling at each other's jeans, trying to get them off. Naked, they pulled the sheets over them, and for a while afterward the room was filled with the sounds of lips on skin, and the occasional gasp of joy. The sky outside grew dark. Eventually, Kirito reached toward the nightside, opening the drawer to grab a condom. He was surprised, however, when Asuna's hand shot out to stop him.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "Do you not want...?"

"I want it," she whispered. "Just...don't use protection."

Kirito stared at her. Don't use...?

"I-I have to use a condom..." he stammered. "You could get pregnant."

Asuna's face darkened. Rolling away from him, she curled up on the opposite side of the bed, leaving Kirito crouched with one hand in the drawer, confused.

He drew closer to her, but she didn't look at him. "Asuna..."

He was about to reach out a hand to comfort her when he realized she was crying.

"Asuna," he came up behind her, putting his arms around her. "What's wrong? Tell me."

"I don't know what I'm thinking," she sobbed. "I'm an awful person."

Kirito's heart squeezed painfully. What was causing her so much pain? "You're not. Asuna, please, tell me what's going on."

"I am awful. Because we already have a child. What would we do if...if...what would we tell Yui?"

It suddenly struck him what she was talking about. "Asuna..."

She turned to him, "Don't you ever wonder, Kirito? What it would be like to have a...a child in this world?" Tears were shining in her eyes. "Is it bad to wonder?"

Kirito felt what she wasn't saying. What would it be like to have a real child? But he knew, they both knew, Yui was real. She was just confined to one side...

Kirito hugged her tightly. "I don't think it's bad. I wonder sometimes too. Sometimes I wish Yui were here, with us. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a child here in this world."

Asuna sniffed. "Why does it have to be so difficult? I feel like every day we're choosing...choosing whether to live in this world or that one, and we can never bring ourselves to do it."

Kirito closed his eyes, sharing her pain. Everything she said was true. If he were honest with himself, he didn't know which world he belonged to. Why was it so difficult? "I don't know, Asuna."

They stayed like that for a long time, huddled naked under the sheets, wrapped in each other's arms. It was late when Kirito awoke, realizing he had dozed off. Asuna stirred when he did, blinking in the lamplight.

"I've got to finish my homework. I have stuff due tomorrow," she mumbled.

As they got up and dressed, Kirito looked at the time. "I know it's late, but...should we go see Yui later?"

Asuna thought for a moment, then nodded.

It was almost two o'clock in the morning when they finally returned from New Aincrad. Kirito was in the bathroom, brushing his teeth when he felt his eyeglass vibrate in his pocket.

We have received the files, Sylver wrote. You will meet me tomorrow, in person, in the back room of the Azure Kitty Parlor at 2 p.m. If you do not comply, we will show the video footage to Asuna.

Kirito stared at the message in his eyeglass. Shifting his focus, he could see his expression in the bathroom mirror. He looked like a ghost.

Hadn't he done everything they asked? Retrieved the files? Handed them control of yet another user-created world? Now he was being summoned, and in-person meeting, as if he'd done something wrong. What did they want from him? Kirito didn't know what to think anymore. When he was done in the bathroom, he crept into Asuna's bed and curled up next to her, like always, but despite how tired he was, he found he could not sleep. Getting up once more, he retired to his study, turning on his computer and flipping through the news outlets. He stayed like that until dawn, then went to the window to watch the sun come up.


Thank you so much for reading. I appreciate your feedback and knowing what you think in the form of a review. I also appreciate faves. Follow the story if you want to read more. It will be updated regularly. I'm planning for it to have 50,000+ words by the end. ~Saoirse

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New Story Title Contest is GO! Just submit your idea for what you think the title of this fanfic should be changed to in the form of a review, tweet or a PM. For tweets, hashtag "storytitlecontest." I will select my favorite, the winner can send me a description of an Original Character they want to be featured in this fanfic, and I will include that OC in the upcoming chapters.